"Cruisin' the murky waters of User Sub for pearls and sunken treasure." That's me motto. ...y'know what. Nobody ever comes to these things. I'm not famous. If you're reading this, it's because you've made a real commitment to learning more about me, and I want to reward you for that. Let's start with 10 simple rules for life: 1. Using Spanish words casually will make you seem cool, hombre. 2. When you're chatting up a girl/boy, ask yourself "Is dis easy?" If yes, is diseasy. 3. Name your dog 'Bucket'. That way, you can set him loose in your ex's yard and repeatedly shout "Come Bucket!" without getting arrested again. 4. To all you young whippersnappers out there: stop snapping whips! We old folks need them. You don't need to know why. 5. Your perfect girl is kind, intelligent, and a little shorter than you - so in a word she is 'understanding'. 6. Apparently, you can't describe colours to a blind person: you have to say 'black people'. 7. The key to comedy is it's all about the delivery. Unfortunately, mine is like a petite woman with octuplets. (The great thing about that joke is either you're laughing or I'm right) 8. If someone insults you, don't retaliate in kind. Kindness should have nothing to do with it. 9. Write a book about a stranger in prison; it's about time someone did. 10. You should only ever have sex three times in a row, maximum, because four fucks ache guys... They call my penis The Treasure: - it's like, so precious - I can never find it - help me bury it? - whaddya know, the Treasure was inside you all along Pretty poem #1 - Love is staring at the skies Reflected in another's eyes And ever seeing stars inside Some username suggestions (all free as at time of writing): @LordYoinkethaway (now taken!) @ThePantychrist @iSpeakImglish @SteeeeroooiiidJeeeeeenkiiiiins @MyLoveIsLikeAHurricaneAKANewWhoreLeans @TheScientits @TakeMyLoveTakeMyLandTakeAwayMyHotdogStand @iDontCareCosImStill3 @YouCantTakeThisPieFromMe (now taken!) Strategy #1: 1. Gain doctorate. 2. Teach a university class. 3. ??? 4. Prof it. Strategy #2: 1. Learn to fake seizures. 2. Make living hustling passers-by. 3. ??? 4. Pro fit Strategy #3: 1. Have a superficial TV show. 2. Support family member's decision to change gender. 3. ??? 4. P.R. off it Seriously though, ask me anything. I'm a problem solver by nature and I like to help people out. Big talk: we all have too few outlets for it, and that's a shame.
Honestly? Because most of them were focused on doing their jobs. Remember when politicians did jobs? Like, actually deliberated policy or sat on hearing committees? It's why half of them get into politics. The other half look or sound good at the podium. Neither group is innately good at probing for opposition weaknesses - that's a new breed of politician.
On our cistern.
Oh shit it's the Rapture, better sell my car!
Hasn't that been the US' official position for decades? That Taiwan both exists and doesn't?
#20 this posters name reminded me that we still haven't caught Joseph Kony :(
Or you're unable to take even the slightest critique of your worldview, even from an ally on the same side. And so instead of welcoming discussion as to why we might not fully agree, you move to shut it down, and call me pedantic and wrong. That's gatekeeping. It does us more harm than good.
Ok.... Except this whole post is about cancelling and not "free speech". Again, I'm clued up on what's happening and supportive, but this tweet is bad.
There was such a golden era of comedy when Always Sunny, The League and Blue Mountain State were all active at the same time.
If I had written Twilight, I would have sought psychological help
I get the sentiment, but this a false narrative. In-groups always use mob mentality to attack out-groups, it's not a partisan issue and the damages are not limited to either side. There's a good book called "So You've Been Publicly Shamed" (Jon Ronson) that covers the ill effects of "well-meaning" mobs enacting social justice.
My wife is "the best bargain in the bin"
Lmao imagine if there were horses in the sea, that's cray
This guy bangs
"the Blacks" fuggin' YEESH
Advancing with some assault moves
Did he spend billions, or make billions? Did he create the modern conservative movement or benefit from being its champion?
What do you think of this then - will it be adorning your living room (or any other rooms) any time soon?
Maybe I'm being dumb, but what does "fully depreciated woman" mean?
Presumably, the owners released the video?
In Japan: what kids?
I think I remember this, wasn't it was from... 2018 or so?
My big evil corpo makes catalysts, and it's incredible how well AI can sort through millions of potential formulations to find the best fit for selectivity, light-off, speed etc. I can only imagine what they're achieving over in the protein space.
Heaven is wasted on the heathen
Nah the world's better off, mate
Sick
She's watching her weight
Balls to do
Lmao at Elon fighting. Even his bullets would come out as limp noodles
Are you having a nice day?
His legacy dies on.