DeepThoughtsByJackHandey

5761 pts ยท October 19, 2015


When a kid asks why it rains I think a cute thing to say is "It's because God is crying." Then if he asks why God is crying, I'd say "Probably because of something you did."

Wat?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

I hate whoever tried to sort the fellowship in #44 they are wrong about nearly everyone.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I don't like that word in this context.

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

I feel like that sword is edited in somehow.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 2

Yes. What was this?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Put your dick in it

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Found something worse than filming vertically.

6 years ago | Likes 579 Dislikes 4

Dude used meteorological skills to time his claims and swindle some peeps.

7 years ago | Likes 225 Dislikes 4

Bush did 9/11

7 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 43

I love my lips!

7 years ago | Likes 24 Dislikes 0

I don't think it would justify her, but does anyone have any context here?

7 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 1

Isn't the earth one upside down?

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Why would shaving that one dog be so bad?

7 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

Are you trying to repeat that?

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I like that the other one just tries to smack him.

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It's obvious greedy bastards won't get into heaven. The issue is conflating God and government. He cares about what we choose to be.

7 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 3

Jesus was also pretty big on personal choice. Being compelled on pain of prison to give to the poor, what reward have ye?

7 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 4

Florida man seen stealing vending machine.

7 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

The most compelling argument against this moron: "another words you have faith."

7 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Brb gotta take a leak.

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It's a boy baggage claim.

7 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Don't wanna be that guy or anything but these are all things parents should be teaching kids. Education has to happen outside of school, too

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Is that poop hanging off his butthole?

8 years ago | Likes 165 Dislikes 11

This gif made me forget to savor my burger

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

As someone who works in a tire shop I hate all these people.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Was he a c-section?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I mean if you're saying he's self aggrandizing, you're giving him credit for something he doesn't deserve.

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

I spent the summer in Alaska hunting wolverines. Yeah, like 50 of 'em. They kept trying to attack my cousins!

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 2