#12 What should a person even do in this situation? Instinct says paddle to shore, but the splashing will likely get the sharks attention as a possible snack. Maybe instead hold very still and ride out an exploratory bump or two on the boat and hope it just views him as a log and moves on?
From videos I've seen in the past, if a shark bites on to the boat it'll probably just take a second or two before realizing "Oh, not food" and leave. Probably best to cut the lines like they did and just wait for the shark to leave first? Then probably also leave because it's now the sharks fishing spot.
#12 what you mean "WAS"?!?!?! you still plenty deep & away from land for you to red flag the fukken "WAS" out there like you a shark slayer.... bruh talk about balls of steel to throw that out while shark still up your ass waiting for a slice...
I'm no sharkologist, but it seems silly the way he's reacting. You ain't paddling away faster than a shark can swim, not even close. I mean do paddle away, but stop thrashing around in an obvious panic, that just makes you seem like prey and it's probably the main reason why the shark kept following him
#1 That's nothing. We used to put 2-3 mattresses down in the back yard, twins with springs maybe 8" thick in a single stack, then jump off the 2nd story balcony onto them. Man are boys dumb as shit.
The only way he would actually suffocate should be if he started hyperventilating. I was a his size and was trapped in one of these partially against my will. It would still be terrifying though, even non-claustrophobic people can be overtaken by panic. I just kinda sat in there, breathing was easy, but I was just sitting there fuming and thinking things over.
#9 - Any time I think about engaging with some moron on the Internet, I remember this scene and move on. Do Not Feed the Trolls. They might actually be vampires, don't risk it.
It's really fun to troll Trump supporters though. You just have to remind them that Donald Trump is a child rapist and only the real sleaze bags respond but they eventually tire out too
Back in the USEnet days (late 90's) I posted into alt.animals.dolphins that I had a dolphin in my backyard swimming pool and was feeding it canned creamed corn but it was developing blisters on its back and asked if that was normal. I cross posted it into 40 other groups, like rec.cars.ford and some McDonalds employee groups, and almost all the responses went to all 40+ groups. That troll's shenanigans went on for 4 months - it was glorious.
It was a long time ago, when there were literally organized armies (think alt.hellflamewars) doing stuff like this a lot. In a part of the Internet (USEnet) that wasn't part of the world wide web, to boot.
relsky
#3 makes me so happy.
markiel
#4 wtf
deckai
#12
rhuala
#9, my new hero
bloobiebloob
#3 This touches my heart.
yeahhedugit
#7 mid dump interlude.
NearHereThere
#11 Wow I have the exact same step stool. Just repainted it Brunswick Green last weekend : ) : )
IWantToHugEveryCat
#10
boobsalot
#2 Drugs are a terrible drug .
BullittGT
#5 Asshole
divingin
Does outsmarting (using the term loosely) an animal really make you feel that much better about yourself?
BullittGT
That person was a complete jerk teasing the animal.
zoeytg
#2 good way to get yourself shot.
TheInternetNeedsMoreCats
#12 What should a person even do in this situation? Instinct says paddle to shore, but the splashing will likely get the sharks attention as a possible snack. Maybe instead hold very still and ride out an exploratory bump or two on the boat and hope it just views him as a log and moves on?
Capum15
From videos I've seen in the past, if a shark bites on to the boat it'll probably just take a second or two before realizing "Oh, not food" and leave. Probably best to cut the lines like they did and just wait for the shark to leave first? Then probably also leave because it's now the sharks fishing spot.
Warune
#2 *being stabbed* ahhh your killing me smalls!
Paullovespizza
Titanslayerzeus
#3 what a good brother.
snarkybitch
Yea that was sweet
yamamasyamaha
U know where there aren’t any great white sharks?
Land.
But What does land have?
Bears.
You can see how this is a predicament
OobedoobScoobyDoobyBenubi
#3 don’t lie bro we can tell lol
earthlingextraordinaire
#11
beerlady
We know where John was for 3 hours
Blze001
#1 Looking back on me as a kid: it's a miracle I survived.
Kugartun
We had a game where we'd get every blanket in the house and tie you in by layers. We would let you out after you screamed too much
Arakon
#2 Dude even walks like an asshole.
AlexSomething
Dude suffers from ILS, Invisible Lat Syndrome.
Brommith
He walks like he's got muscles and has a dad body instead
Ifekinlovesauerkraut
That's called waddling, not walking.
Snezko
#12 what you mean "WAS"?!?!?! you still plenty deep & away from land for you to red flag the fukken "WAS" out there like you a shark slayer.... bruh talk about balls of steel to throw that out while shark still up your ass waiting for a slice...
garbuhj
I'm no sharkologist, but it seems silly the way he's reacting. You ain't paddling away faster than a shark can swim, not even close. I mean do paddle away, but stop thrashing around in an obvious panic, that just makes you seem like prey and it's probably the main reason why the shark kept following him
Chaoticgoodsoul
Last one: Australia?
RandomStuffsandThings
#1 That's nothing. We used to put 2-3 mattresses down in the back yard, twins with springs maybe 8" thick in a single stack, then jump off the 2nd story balcony onto them. Man are boys dumb as shit.
TheInternetNeedsMoreCats
I was so worried he'd get trapped and suffocate.
Yrmsteak
The only way he would actually suffocate should be if he started hyperventilating. I was a his size and was trapped in one of these partially against my will. It would still be terrifying though, even non-claustrophobic people can be overtaken by panic. I just kinda sat in there, breathing was easy, but I was just sitting there fuming and thinking things over.
triptolemus510
I broke my friend's arm doing this bullshit.
PalaverQuader
#2 put the video on social media an let AI narrate the story? yes? no?
byronwilliams4010
#4 I bet the driver of the truck towing that thing had a moment where he seriously considered just driving on. Maybe even speeding up.
IlTerribile
hell, even i thinked that.
Rogerwilco1974
*thunked
azgrak1
He could have been the hero and slowed down to stop the drum.
SteamPriest
"That thing's not mine, it's been riding my ass me for miles."
moleander
#12 you need a bigger boat.
Ardranor
And maybe a couple flash bangs
Djkb6718
https://media0.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1M2Q0enR5em54M2Nsemdza20ybTlpMzQwbnc5YzFmbGZoaHB0Ymc5NCZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/LoNTNKvZNN08YSxuAw/200w.webp
earthlingextraordinaire
#2
andrewgrr1
As he's actively stabbing you, "You're killin me, Smalls! Heh, got'em. *dies*"
earthlingextraordinaire
nefroye
I still use that expression all the time.
DoctorSciencePothead
#9 - Any time I think about engaging with some moron on the Internet, I remember this scene and move on. Do Not Feed the Trolls. They might actually be vampires, don't risk it.
TopFurret
"Nice try energy vampire."
Arbitrarynamehere
That's not how trolling works. Read a book.
DianNaoChong
Don't wrestle a pig in the mud, you both get dirty and the pig enjoys it
PolarHailStorm
This is true. These days it's even easier, because the chance of it being a bot response, or some sort of AI farm for clicks is so high.
stoots24
Like the monkeys in the new Superman movie.
lovehandlesmessiah
My groan was audible and exhausting at that. Much like Lex Luthor’s ultimate goal being yet another real estate scam.
SeanBeanJovi
Lex's goal for Jarhanpur is similar to Trump's goal for Gaza.
lovehandlesmessiah
Lex is at least intelligent and innovative. I wouldn’t trust Trump to read the warning of a bottle of Clorox before he drank it.
worldrecordstudios
It's really fun to troll Trump supporters though. You just have to remind them that Donald Trump is a child rapist and only the real sleaze bags respond but they eventually tire out too
HandoB4Javert
majortool
I find that to be a very racist opinion.
masarian
Username checks out?
TeamSpicyTacos
Must.... Fight.... The urge.... Aughuaughsugh
RuBisCO1
Yeah, vampires and trolls are two completely different species let alone races!
TheHillsHaveNostrils
...Must...resist...urge...to...salute
Jwhite777
Back in the USEnet days (late 90's) I posted into alt.animals.dolphins that I had a dolphin in my backyard swimming pool and was feeding it canned creamed corn but it was developing blisters on its back and asked if that was normal. I cross posted it into 40 other groups, like rec.cars.ford and some McDonalds employee groups, and almost all the responses went to all 40+ groups. That troll's shenanigans went on for 4 months - it was glorious.
Chagrinnish
alt.jwhite777.die.die.die
Jwhite777
It was a long time ago, when there were literally organized armies (think alt.hellflamewars) doing stuff like this a lot. In a part of the Internet (USEnet) that wasn't part of the world wide web, to boot.
lovehandlesmessiah
rec.arts.dolphins.erotica