Zewzur
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Feb 24, 2015 4:14 PM
Zewzur
471016
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PORTUGUESETORTURING
What about clip. You can clip together two clips, or clip a clip from a clip.
MarietteEasley3
Are you pulling your hair or my hair?
VeritasEtAequitas
I found out that "Bi-weekly" can mean either twice a week, or once every two weeks.
xooberon
It means twice a week, but apparently in the States they don't have the word fortnight? So they use it for both instead of using fortnightly
UnemployedInGreenland
Biweekly is every other week. Semi-weekly is twice a week.
bobatomic
Check out the definition for "cleave"
sharpsheers
Literally.
Threns
So I guess Fucktorious can be both catastrophically bad and gloriously awesome....
BootsCatsBootsCatsBootsCats
This post is sick
ocswing
A reason why evolving language can be bad. Idiots end up doing things like this.
Islander255
I've always used "chuffed" in its positive connotation
wadenelson1
Wicked.
ravnicrasol
English is my second language studied it all my life, been asked how the pronunciation works, and I still don't know how to answer them.
kindsoberandfullydressed
"Just say the word and I'll tell you if you're saying it right."
ArdentSlacker
It doesn't, so you have to study harder. But not like, mandarin hard, so you can actually get proficient.
MrE158
It depends a lot on which of the other 190 languages on Earth that English stole the word from.
MrE158
(number for illustrative purposes only)
Dispari
As a native English speaker, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Queeditch
At first, I thought you were lying, because in my language your username means "get off" and/or "get lost". LOL
Dispari
Apparently it's Italian and means something in another language too.
Queeditch
Pronounciation is key, after all. And the way one's brain is wired.
tovarischkrasnyjeshi
If you know the vowel chart, stressed vowels just rose/diphthongized. Before we had a 7 vowel system with tense/lax distinctions (14).
InSovietRussiaNudesSendYou
Take a course in English phonetics. You'd be surprised how useful phonetics is, in any language :)
lotny
Easy, the pronunciation changed while the spelling stayed the same. Old English was read as it was written for the most part.
Slothdrivebynapping
Ayy great vowel shift!
TattooedWife
Lol. We dunno either!
nightsider
English is my first language and I still don't know how it fucking works.
Katalliaan
Basically, for every rule, there is at least one exception.
bthighlander
There are only 16 words that follow "i before e except after c" rule. All the rest are exceptions.
qussow
There are no rules to english pronunciation. Just bulldoze right through a sentence and anyone who says otherwise is wrong.
svent
You have to memorize the pronunciation of each word separately :( The emphasis is a real killer.
warick
Well, the thing is it's a Germanic language that got ass-raped by the French language and it's been recovering ever since.
keioto
Wreck it till someone corrects it.
iPeeRivers
Its because we kept the spelling of middle English but our modern English pronunciation continues to change over time.
RosesAreRedMyBedIsGreenIWantYouInItIfYouKnowWhatIMean
Basically, sound it out. Except for when you don't.
superippednobody
Whenever you get mad at english spelling, just go get mad at french instead
ButtAmbassador
Excuse you have you ever even SEEN Welsh? Lwc yn ffycin da!
superippednobody
where are all the vowels!?! 9 letters before you reach a real vowel, zheesh
ButtAmbassador
My theory is that the French stole them. All of them. What few vowels Welsh does have we borrowed from the Scots.
Slartibartfaster
They stole them, and don't even use all of them.
dirkdigglerdancing
Pronunciation changes with context. Easy Peasy.
pmmeyourtitsforpuns
1Tell them that to take the gh in tough, the o in women, and the ti in nation to make the word ghoti, pronounced fish 2Conclude it is insane
EMPeace
English is my first language. There is no system. The people who made this language had no idea what they were doing.
PotatoHamer
a teacher once told me that is how they catch spies
Loren1350
Second and third?
BMANN
English is my first language and I'm 24. There have been times I've read a word online, like 'vinyl', and I've completely mispronounced it.
ViridianLancer
The problem is that English is the bastard child of about 5 languages, and we have the bad habit of adapting the pronunciation of the (1/?)
ViridianLancer
original language. For example, English is based predominantly on German, if memory serves, with stron influence from the romance (2/?)
ViridianLancer
languages such as French, Italian, and Spanish. All of which have different pronunciations, often for very similar words. Taking it (3/?)
ViridianLancer
further with a simple gloss will reveal that in all four of the romance languages (which is where our word 'no' comes from) you can (4/)
ViridianLancer
see that while French (non) and English (no) have roughly the same word, the French Non is a nasal sound, whereas the English No is (5/6)
downsouthfarm
It has the opposite meaning when used ironically. Us native English speakers are ironic a lot.
wandergeist
Ghoti = fish. We drive on parkways and park in driveways. English speakers should be in a home for the linguistically insane.
Mithi
"English speakers should be in a home for the linguistically insane." is now part of my quotation collection.
LumiVaris
Gotta love pidgin trading languages that evolved to incorporate words, spelling, and grammar from like seven different languages.
wfgodbold
This is how English pronunciation works: http://ncf.idallen.com/english.html
kindsoberandfullydressed
I love this poem.
NationalSecurityAgentC
Ah yes, an educational tool for spurring independent study on excessive profanity.
yy0b
you sort of get a feel for it after years and years of confusion and suffering, but then it shits on you again
NuclearBoxcutter
And during conversation you say something like "sub-toll"
chbarts
Subtle; I like it.
layduhlayduhlay
Or "bass" instead of "bass" wait
sergiosss
The first rule of English Pronunciation club is: read does not rhyme with lead.
sergiosss
The second rule of English Pronunciation club is: read does not rhyme with lead.
SirSidneyRuffDiamond
What if I read a lead book?
ReneDeGames
The second rule of English Pronunciation is: read does rhyme with lead. (as in to lead)
ravnicrasol
This paradox has triggered me.
Shakespeareismyhomeboy
Inflammable vs Flammable. That annoys me all the time.
FullPlateHero
LITERALLY
copingcabana
I sanction this post.
WillJeSuis
When I saw 'chuffed' I was immediately like "Ha! I know what this means!" read more... "I did not know what this means..."
JPBStory
No, trust me you do know what it means. Nobody uses it to mean displeased.
CarltheMexicanWhoopingLlama
Jimmies Egregiously Chuffled (nonplussed 1)
Coalface
These are indeed perfectly cromulent words!
pixelsnader
Egregious means awesome.
zbassist
This post is awful.
TherinGreydude
Biweekly can also mean twice a weak or every two weaks.
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
Week*
TherinGreydude
Whoops, yes of course.
GianlucaG
Inflammable means flammable? What a country!
whotheFUCKletthedogsout
This is so aladeen
Pyrowolf1
What's Aladdin got to do with this? ARE YOU JAFAR?!?
nonepizzawithleftbeeef
You're HIV aladeen! *smiles/frowns/smiles again*
ChubbyStyles
Aladeen mothafucka
WhatsAHoya
Seraphim mothafucka
hetnkik
Inflammable means flammable? What a country!
TheWayADrillWorks
Hiya, Dr. Nick!
TheFlyingHellfish
"inflammable" means "able to be inflamed."
hetnkik
I was going say, "Don't watch much Simpsons, do you?" And then I saw your username.
TheFlyingHellfish
jinhikari
It's not like other languages don't do this, either. In Japanese, the word "sugoi" can mean amazing or horrible depending on context.
JohnDWagner
you mean like "wow" or "fuck" in English?
IrohJR
Sugoi is basically Japan's equivalent of "WOW". It's an exclaimation that means diff stuff in diff contexts
Nize426
Yeh, I wouldn't say it sugoi actually has two meanings like the words in the post.
JohnDWagner
Заебись = Fuck Yes!/Fuck No! in Russian. Context is key.
ButtAmbassador
And like Chinese has an entire story made up of the single syllable "shi" and its four tones.
tekkenchoir
Kinda like the work "wicked"?
unresponsivenipples
Sugoi isn't nearly as fun as yabai. I failed my test, yabai! I passed my test, yabai! I got in a car crash, yabai! I'm pregnant, yabai!
AtalanBeardy
I like how that last one still doesn't haven't enough context.
unresponsivenipples
It's a situational word. It's kind of like saying "damn". Say it like "DAMN" it's bad, say it like "DAAAAYM" and it's good.
pandorafalters
I believe @AtalanBeardy's point was that "I'm pregnant" is the only example that isn't clearly good or bad.
unresponsivenipples
In the pregnant one, I can imagine it being like, "FUCK I'm pregnant!" or "OMG I'm actually pregnant finally!" Could be either, so yeaaah..
SwedishElectricianandSchnitzelGuru
Swedish Excels at this: Gift means marriage/poison, Här means army/here, Så means so/plant (verb). And the list goes on...
pandorafalters
None of these are opposites, though. This is like "yes" also meaning "no" . . . which, come to think of it, would explain some things. Hm.
SwedishElectricianandSchnitzelGuru
I was thinking more of words with the same spelling and pronunciation with two different meanings. But I understand what you mean :)
tokomak
YABAI
imguryousuck
And the number four is also death
JohnDWagner
Thank the Chinese overloads for that one.
Nize426
I understand the context, but Imma be that guy and tell you that those are different words that sound the same. Like sea and see
jonestown
"Aloha" means "Hello" and "Goodbye."
kanybal
"It's terrible !" in French can either mean terrible or great. Confusing as an English learner...
UnpopularOpinionPuffinPersonified
Terrible can actually mean horrible or great in English as well. It's just the "great" use has fallen out of common use.
IrohJR
That's a terribly awesome comment
UnpopularOpinionPuffinPersonified
Psalm 47:2 in the Bible is a good example. In 1611 when translated terrible meant great, or mighty.
LiterallyWrote
Ivan the Terrible gettin a bad rap these days.
XaiaX
We can repeat something, but we can't peat it. We have underneath, but not overneath. You can be over-, or under-, but not exactly whelmed.
wadenelson1
Don't be couth, man.
GimlisaurusRex
You can peat things: gardens, malt for whisky... (Has zip to do with the other meaning...)
riiight
These are called autoantonyms, and to the disgust of many, "literally" has been added to their ranks.
millertime89
Good dammit...
svent
The second usage is not really the opposite, it's just used to add emphasis.
riiight
It is the opposite in the sense that one means "not figuratively" and the other means "figuratively"
svent
So people often use it when they're being figurative, but I don't think I've ever heard it used to mean "figuratively", ...
svent
only to intensify. It's just that you can only tell someone doesn't know its original meaning when they use it on a figure of speech.
LiterallyWrote
This shit…
arjan2
"He literally died laughing" is only wrong if the person didn't actually die, but can be right when you mean he didn't? WTF??
Onelesspossibleusername
I wouldn't say that literally's definition has become "the opposite", it's just colloquially used now as an ironic embellishment.
riiight
It is the opposite in the sense that one definition means "not figuratively" and the other means "figuratively"
FreshCaviar
literally (adv.) 1. Really. 2. Not really.
PhaserRave
What does "irony" fall under?
Moxieus
Intense scrutiny
riiight
A misused word. Unfortunately, there is no real word to describe the situations to which is it most often applied, namely (1/2)
riiight
(2/2) coincidences that are drastically unfortunate.
PhaserRave
I hate it when people use it like that.
riiight
But what word should we use?
naughtydismutase
I literally can't
Pumpkinbot
And now I don't know if you really can't, or if you figuratively can't. :(
naughtydismutase
I literally literally can't!
YamatoIouko
THAT ISN'T HELPING! *hairpull*
naughtydismutase
Are you pulling your hair or my hair?
xooberon
I'm usually okay with language changing but that and nonplussed bother me
IsDisassembled
And now "literally" does the same thing. http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/126/314/3cd8a33a.png?1306264975
Imthedroidyouwerelookingfor
They changed the definition in the dictionary.
xboxnolifes
Which is what he basically just said.
GuardsmanMiku
the power of sarcasm
TastyBrainMeats
NO IT FARTING WELL DOES NOT
copingcabana
I sanction this.
XaiaX
"And now" meaning a century ago. Just like "really", which literally means the same thing as literally.
yayfrisbee
Lived in UK all my life and NEVER heard "chuffed" as a bad thing
giveittomestraightlikeapearcidermadefrom100percentpears
I sometimes say "OH CHUFFING HELL!" but i think i use the chuff is just a substitute for a curse word.
MyFavouriteColourIsBlue
I'm in NZ and I've never heard it used to mean something bad either, wtf.
elucidatefurther
I asked my British cousin what it meant when he said it; he said it meant pleased.
DonaldTrumpsPubicCombover
Lived in US all my life and never heard "chuffed" ever. Sometimes I think you guys are just making these words up, even if they are old.
erischilde
I'm Canadian, but i don't know if i can speak for all of us. I've heard it used as "minorly annoyed"
cookiii
I don't chuffing believe it!
peridotstar
American checking in--I only ever heard the word 'chuffed' as the sound that tigers and big cats make like a huffy noise they do.
themexicanwave
Have you heard it used as a replacement for 'farted'? I have...
IDontReadHoroscopes
Yeah I have it's what my mum used to say instead of fart or whatever.
manovsteele
Guffed yes, chuffed no.
themexicanwave
Discount the 3rd Windows machine as it was a fucking Acer the repair shop gave me for nothing while the HP was in for (unsuccesful) repair.
Lazynesse
2/2 Context and inflection is key in determining context, but is undeniably confusing.
MarkViduka
In yorkshire I've heard "you chuffing idiot" which is bad but also a different word. Why did I post this.
agitatedbear
agreed. But never just 'chuffed' as bad. I'm glad you posted it. It meant I didn't feel so alone ;)
martianandy
I've heard chuffed off, but never just on its own to be negative
JPBStory
I second this. I've heard it used to mean pleased hundreds, if not thousands of times but not once have I heard it meaning displeased.
Lazynesse
Lived in Scotland for 6 years. Heard it both ways, but acceptable use is not as broad as the definitions given would suggest. 1/2
Kingkoopa456
chuffing non plussed egregious bastards
WhereIsThatFrogOMine
We should provide them with sanctions
NotACanadian
☐Thanks ☐Fuck you
Sintanan
So, this is the cool new thing? Using contradictory words to be cool?
MikeyDew
you neutral sonofabitch...
Airscape
http://theinfosphere.org/images/e/ea/Neutral_People.jpg
Antipus405
Cleave
toomanythiiiiiiiings
nonplussed**
semaphora
ZapTap
This photo always freaks me out and makes me rally uncomfortable.
RetsamEvalsEht
I'm at least 90% sure that your last word set the tone for assuming the meaning of the ambiguous parts... I'm quite chuffed over your post.
jvjanisse
egregious isn't that uncommon of a word, is it? "you made an egregious error" i've heard multiple times before.
ChuffingNonplussedEgregiousBastard
Oh... hi
JustLivin
RaultxO
That's outrageous!
creatingusernamesgivesmeanxiety
Literally.
chapternine
Are we being insulted or complimented? Little column A, little column B I guess.
RomaniIteDomum
nonplussed is one word you egregious bastard
zackofspades
bas-tard (n): 1. ill-mannered or disloyal 2. chivalrous and outrageously well-hung
hesychasticextrovert
source: urbandictionary.com?
zackofspades
4chan.
BiggestBlackestBeard
U WOT M8?
Summersky
Oh yeah, I'll chuff you baby ;) [rhythmically humps the air like beautiful rhinoceros]
DoctorJungyBrongen
They are everything. But at the same time nothing.
kmikl
NSFW that post, good sir.
Civikjm
I'm pretty sure one of these words is not like the others...
watchrinserepeat
not according to Eddie Izzard
YourNeighborCheerio
One of these words just doesn't belong
ABouchard55
It's Colin.
Rebellion777
Sweet reference bro
CptKoolaid
Igotthatreference.jpg
Glyd
I found the difference! "non" only has one vowel in it.
[deleted]
[deleted]
learningisfun
Good boy
alpoopy
Good boy
learningisfun
Good boy
learningisfun
Good boy
DeathInABottle
Good boly
DeathInABottle
Fcuk!
mashdots
Now with the allocation and the understanding of the lack of understanding, we enter into a new era of science in which we feel nothing 1/3
mashdots
more than so much so as to say that those within themselves, comporary or non-comporary, will figuratively figure into the folding of our2/3
mashdots
non-understanding and our partial understanding to the networks of which we all draw our source and conclusions from. 3/3
matrix86
.............hodor
zimirken
fat rolls to find the cheeseburger within. 3/3
penzick
'Irregardless' is a word. It means 'regardless.' *sigh*
ButtAmbassador
Check your linguistic privilege, prescriptivist shitlord
GonzoTom
False. It means regardless of Ir, lord of all that the sun touches.
LittleAutumnLeaves
...Mufasa..?
NothingRhymesWithClockworkOrange
Regardless, you're still an idiot if you use irregardless.
yayfrisbee
Genius Ingenious
erockinit
Whatwhatsomethingbutt
http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?id=3598#comic
penzick
Okay, that makes me happy. Thanks.
farwall
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8mD2hsxrhQ
kindsoberandfullydressed
It is a word inasmuch as people use it, despite the fact that dissecting the word would reveal it to mean "regarding."
Leuthil
Flammable inflammable
HaniiPuppy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8mD2hsxrhQ
BungalowMonk
Nonflammable
ZebraCockSandwich
this particular one has pissed me off for years.
XaiaX
Iterate and reiterate.
GimlisaurusRex
...are two quite different words in meaning-- iterate meaning to repeat numerous cycles to a goal, reiterate meaning to reinforce a point.
XaiaX
But it literally means "iterate again", so it means "do it again again". It's like table mesa, sahara desert, or the la brea tar pit.
XaiaX
Or, my favorite, the los angeles angels. "The the angels angels"
LizardEnterprises
You will never convince me that 'irregardless' is a word! The line must be drawn heah! This fah! No Furthah!
jofo4242
calm down Ahab
TheBlackShakes
You mean Captain Picard
LizardEnterprises
Noooo!!!! *smashes the imgur mobile app*
jofo4242
.....you broke your little phone...