ruffcats
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Part 90: http://imgur.com/gallery/34bN0
Part 92: http://imgur.com/gallery/WT6NG
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Message me your confessions!
LocutusOfBored
Me after reading these. http://imgur.com/R430rQL
porkiloki
The bedsheet full of holes, isn't that Charlie Brown? Who received a rock in the comics so....it all....fits.
CoolHandRK
http://i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/483/894/463.jpg
piggyhoho
These weren't nearly as terrifying and scarring as they usually are. I can deal.
Supernerdtastic
Except for the period blood. Yikes.
piggyhoho
Lol, I said NEARLY. I still cringed a bit with a few. Especially that one & the guy busting a load on his carpet for years.
pyrobob4
I'll just leave this here:
JonSnowForKing
who the fuck cums on the carpet?
acidjuicemotel
"Oh you shouldn't do that Don't you know you'll stain the carpet"
NotaCop12345
@sovietpenguin ...sigh...cites in the mail.
jazzmatazz
Is the pregnant a new Pokemon we're trying to catch?
RoboticFeline
First a candle, then ice cream, now this?
cookiecakemonster
some pokéball lingere would not go amiss.
Sreds
Meowth, that's right!
batlrar
Hm, not sure if I want to see the shiny version ...
DC1123
twins!
beckadoomsday
I don't have enough badges yet. And by badges, I mean money.
StrideWideMan
It's more like a naturally occurring pokeball that only carries one sort of creature.
IamtheGreatQueenSnugglewombs
It could be, if you dress it properly
MartynMage
#9 WASH THE FLOOR DAMMIT D:
MyNamesMace
May I suggest tearing it up?
Zziltoid
Tissues? Like, wtf. Cummon.
Ohmyglobwhat
Bafum tis
ICannotDecideOnAUsername
Bafum? As a drummer, I want you to show me the drum that makes that sound.
SouthernSig
How is this just now a problem? Should've been a problem the 1st time. Like "oh, I jizzed on da flo, lemme clean that up" normal motherfcker
Soltype
i am extraordinarily lazy, lmao
SouthernSig
An answer from the man himself. You nasty motherfucker.
Thesmithlord
Atleast its not the cumbox.
Kenmeth
I'm not the only one who remembers!
degenerator
*with your own urine. Coming out of the same spout.
Jackalac
probly gonna have to cut that piece out
ButThisBitAlwaysTricksYou
#TeamRuffcatsSnapchat
GimmeYoSandwhich
All of the yes
thebibbee
"Catch the pregnant"
Agorbs
BEDSHEET IS A CHARLIE BROWN REFERENCE PEOPLE
Lugh314159
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tIhwITwhSg We know. It wasn't funny then, it's not funny now.
NoiceSmart
Seriously guys? None of the top comments were disgust at TASTING PERIOD BLOOD?! Come on!!
IhavenoideawhatIamtalkingabout
35 over the limit is pretty damn fast.
TempestChaserZ
Yeah there are VERY few areas in my state you could do that without losing your license and your car being impounded...
DJFluffers115
I've never given any assholes a rock, but I have rocked quite a few assholes.
Idownvotewhenyousayplus1
I'm missing the point on that one, it just sounds like a poor kids costume.
jellybeansRAWOFCOURSE
Nicccceee
drinkbeerdamnit
You.....you sir deserve all the upvotes
relpmeraggy
Damn you post a lot of crap about video games. @DJFluffers115
relpmeraggy
Going on your profile just to upvote a few things based on this comment.
mrpresident76
asporium
@sovietpenguin ugh... math...
othersideofthetree
x=35, for you lazy people
dublet
Why would you not clean the floor after you finish?
cursedlemon
I think he means carpet. Maybe.
RogueFirefighter
The real fucking question..
SmellsLikeFish
"I often taste my own period blood." .....
Vortaka
"catch the pregnant"
theseceretsultana
I'm just replying to this comment just to confuse you due to the amount of time that has past.
pairofsixes
it won't be long if she keeps tripple-dipping
DMBFDP
She sounds really cool
beckadoomsday
http://imgur.com/088mQLK
DMBFDP
?
beckadoomsday
It's an idiom, I'm agreeing with you that I am cool.
BETTYFUCKINWHITE
@beckadoomsday : ProTip - dress as a pregnant nun.
beckadoomsday
Then I'm admitting I'm too old for candy! I'll just have to make sure the baby is born prior to Halloween and then take it to harvest candy.
ionlybrowseimgurwhileatwork
I hope I don't catch the pregnant for awhile
beckadoomsday
Just like you caught my upvotes you harlot. It's okay though I've got the candy ;)
BillyMaysHereWithOxiClean
Gotta be careful, it's pregnancy season.
ahumbledupstart
AKA Ovulation.
MrTurtleWings
I'm imagining a woman sneezing and suddenly they are 7 months in with a big baby bump.....
Oliolioxenfree123
As a guy with a pregnancy fetish: I'd like that season. ;3
chemistrydoc
Some catch the pregnant and some pitch the pregnant. I'm a 2 time all star pitcher.
ThePterodactylSlayer
Congrats on the sex Doc
AliasPeterJones
5.5 time all star here....don't ask about the .5, too much feels
SoOddICantEven
:(
SingingMeAndCthulioDownByRlyehFhtagn
I got vaccinated
theseceretsultana
I'm just replying to this comment just to confuse you due to the amount of time that has past.
SingingMeAndCthulioDownByRlyehFhtagn
Where am I?!? I am so confused!
theseceretsultana
My plan seems to have worked!
SingingMeAndCthulioDownByRlyehFhtagn
Where did you come from!?!
lockesandkeyes
Yeah, but are you on top of your quarterly booster shots?
SingingMeAndCthulioDownByRlyehFhtagn
I'm mostly a bottom
SingingMeAndCthulioDownByRlyehFhtagn
I'm more of a bottom ;-)
AmandaGrace2770
Absolutely yes. I pay for them with my quarterly gst cheques so I always know when it's time for another. It's a good system. :p
JudgeVegas
I have no idea what that means in this context.
beckadoomsday
I can get away with passing for a tween & getting candy until I start showing a baby bump.
ILoveCuteAnimalsAndStuff
whats tripple-dipping tho
beckadoomsday
It means going to the same houses three times, hence more than one costume.
ILoveCuteAnimalsAndStuff
got it, i had a feeling but never heard the expression
JudgeVegas
Oh, I thought the timeline was a single Halloween night. No reason why you can't resume your career after birth.
beckadoomsday
Afterwards I'll just use my baby to reel in the treats ;)
Jasonsson
TIL @ruffcats is @commonwhitegirl
LetTheJimmiesRustle
#8 How bout I taste it for a change?
cavemammajamma
You and I...we'd be friends.
MartynMage
I am honoured to see this in user sub.
cinderbl0ckno
Do you people really still believe these?
StrideWideMan
Who are calling "you people"?
whatactuallyhappened
I believe maybe, like 3 or 4% are real
AngryAndConfused
For real, some of these are fake as hell especially the cop one.
Lugh314159
It's like letters to Penthouse, or guests on Jerry Springer… They started off as real, but when it got popular, people lied to get on.
DTJames
7 billions of normal people. Yes sir!
LazySatan
What difference does it make?
SuchIsLifeInTheTropics
The only one that I felt was *obviously* fake was the @pigeonkitty one.
MindlessGuyAtTheHelm
@pigeonkitty taking imgurs version of "science" to a whole new level actually involving both sciences.
DoctorWatchamacallit
As a physicist, g
DoctorWatchamacallit
as a physicist, this makes me feel at least somewhat dateab'e
superminiatureblackhole
I don't believe that first one at all, @pigeonkitty.
WilsonFisk
My thoughts exactly, kind of killed the fun of the first few after that
daletvak
@katwoman you're a jealous bitch
loveallthebunnies
@soltype may i suggest soap, water, and not doing that anymore.
wtasman
I was so hoping this problem would be solved down here.
sociallyawkward12
Salt water... not that I would know, or would have any reason to...
ThatBabyDontLookLikeMe
You can also rent a carpet cleaner from home depot people.
WaltWITTman
You and me both @soltype... You and me both
tellemurius
Pet stain remover will do a better job. Water can make it like glue and worse.
thegreatquesadilla
Soak it in a solution of warm water and bleach. Clean and repeat the whole process regulary.
OneBugIsFake
Two words... Love sock.
cleverwittyusername
Stanley Steamer gets you carpets cle-oh god.
chiborino
I read the one before it and thought I had seen the worst one. I immediately found out otherwise.
AKfish
i had a similar spot, and i had to rent a steam cleaner
ThePatchyBeard
Vinegar followed by carpet spot remover would be best. Basically it is a protein stain. Source: I run a motel, I have seen... things.
FantaToTheKnees
Storytime! Srsly, get posting :D
ThePatchyBeard
It's kind of repetitive. Mostly involving some sort of poop somewhere it does not belong.
FantaToTheKnees
Doesn't matter. Poop stories are the best.
Palfrost
Or doing it everywhere else until it gets crusty everywhere.
Squeezit
Please Soltype, for the love of God if you ever bring a woman home...
Soltype
Im a big fan of dick so I dont thats gonna be an issue lmao
MarlboroGold
Maybe some bleach??!!
Raider37343
@soltype Depending on how bad it is...in addition to the soap and water you will probably need a shitload of elbow grease
SnootBoopery
I think a shitload of elbow grease was what got us into this mess
VaguelySatisfying
And by golly, it can get you out!
Ifindyourlackofbearddisturbing
My first laugh of the day. Thanks alien!
PissBasin
The manliest thing on the planet: tasting your own period blood
RadionicPsychotronic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Don5d3JeVUQ
ABCDEFGHIJKelemenoPQRSTUVWXYZ
as a girl... yuck.
chaosmage424
*most metal
TraitorousTrump3
Most coppery?
Thorhees
More iron-y.
ElloTherePoppet
As a girl on my period, I kind of wanted to vomit.
TheMooseLord
womanliest?
PissBasin
I've always assumed manliest is gender neutral, I just associate the word with being strong and detached from its original sub-text
AllTheHotUsernamesAreGay
Damn, negative four points? It's a cruel, cruel world, PissBasin. But you're going to come out of this one cursing a -3, not a -4. /brofist
Imaybegotthis
Nope
phyyrus
As a girl, I must say that that one made me physically cringe.
saltyapplejuice
Dear god me too, I closed my eyes and scrolled up...blech!
aquatanica
Ditto. I can't even eat strawberry jelly that time of the month...bleh
crapinabox
@Katwoman such a bitch lol
KatWoman
Thanks bro.
FlayTheGrayZones
The fact that she would even claim they're friends.. wtf dude. Friends don't do that to each other!
Rehrei
best friends would though... but they would admit it afterwards
docmcstuffandjunk
And what kind of adult can't take someone getting more attention. Lame.
NaMaParus
KatWoman is why so many people don't trust woman as friends
Creamofsumyunggai
@katwoman not having a "slutty" outfit had little to do with why she wasn't getting numbers.. She's as ugly outside as she is inside
bufferkiller
But Kat did get the numbers, it was her slutty friend that didn't. Are you confused?
Charsidious
Instead of hating on her I would have teamed up, that way guys could hit on us with their wingmen so less pressure and more guys
BuffyMarsSavesTheWorld
Yeah I had to scroll down before finishing this post just to comment on how shitty of a friend that is! That is just downright vicious!
raidleadergutts
"friend"
bufferkiller
Roommate and friend are rarely synonymous.
harte
x=35
poopiefacemagee
its at 420 no one upvote
Sovereignbuddha
I did that in my head while a lil drunk and felt really proud of myself.
cookiecakemonster
i would be less attracted to someone ((confessionbear.jpg)) if they couldn't do that math in their head.
HeyCasButt
I'm glad you aren't equally attracted to idiots.
rootedchrome
I used Wolfram-Alpha so I didn't have to math.
quantumpacket
you, sir, need to use your additional computation time to fabricate a 3-dimensional softened histogram outlining the relationship between
unculteredswine
Pssh. I could have figured that out on my own
nation543
@SovietPenguin can expect their speeding ticket in the mail this week.
thatoneguyck
X=15
harte
No.
negativedelta
But why would they obscure the figure, now that's the question.
MOTHERFUCKINGALLAH
pre algebra comes back to haunt you every day for the average imgurian
BigWillie86
I did the negative wrong... :'(
lytesafree
Google!
SergioPena
upvote for you. and a fuck you to all teachers who told us to show our work
harte
I feel so popular =) +1 for everyone who commented
SovietPenguin
Holy shit, I started the algebra train rolling! If the train is 1000kg and on an incline of 25 degrees, how fast is it at 200m? No friction.
TAIfromdigimon
5x-20=3x+50 =>5x=3x+50+20=3x+70 =>2x=70 =>x=70/2=35 ; x=35
jimicos
That cop needs to go.
gamerfool
ummm isnt x = 15? subtract 3x to other side, becomes 2x and minus 20 from 50 makes 30, then divide by 2 gives you 15. x=15
OhHowTheTurntablesHave
Nope, add 20 to both sides (rather than subtract) to negate that original -20, so 2x=70.
gamerfool
ahh yeah those negatives always get me. I never pay enough attention to detail and prolly why i suck at math haha.
ProbablyDrunkAgain
Q.E.D.
Derlino
I thought it said 3x*50, no wonder it didn't make any sense. Going -0.1379 over the speed limit just didn't seem that bad.
EchoOfSnac
I love you.
harte
Love you too <3
HowDoIInternet
Proud I can still do that shit in my head without panicking
thedinosaurhipster
After 8 + 70 what do?
UNC1233
Worry about english first.
SomebodyStoleMyCarRadio
I actually stopped reading that entry right there to solve the problem -_-
Moogin
I miss algebra. It was easy.
southboundpachyderm
Calculator AND pen+paper to double check, you're goddamn right :) Cheers +1
BakedOn
Thanks babe!
yoniweil
In middle school, so, y'know, nailed it (pats self on back with single tear rolling down check)
harte
No problem =)
whoah
Babe, wait! Babe. Wait. Babe! Babe! Babe! BAAAABE. WAIT. BABE WAIT! BABE! WAIT! BABE BABE BABE BABE! BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAABE
atrickissomethingawhoredoesformoney
http://media.giphy.com/media/4wEc48iTKHiU0/giphy.gif
trustmeimalinguist
Ohhhh you gave me the thanks babe D:
BiologicallyHazardousMaterial
I got 14
MissMoosette
Literally scrolled to the top comment after solving it to see if my answer was correct. Today was good.
thatclimbingguy
Wish my studies were that easy...
GittOffMee
I was still smiling triumphantly after solving for x when I got to the period blood one. Smile vanished with the quickness.
Jamblesquack
Dope I got it! Welp, studying is not needed for my math test this week.
Warranty
I legit had no idea how to do that. Explain? I'm dumb, I know.
grantypanties
TIL I can still do algebra.
JustASmallTownMinnesotanImgurlLivingInALonelyWorld
It took me like 20 minutes BUT I GOT IT
aberg11
TIL I can't do algebra anymore.
kelsbells
i don't even know how i passed high school t__t
ZacMuerte
TYL computers can do character recognition and algebra processing faster than you can read the equation. shame it's not as easy for calculus
MetaphoricalFox
I thought the same after sloving it in my head.
Lamplovesme
Would you mind breaking down step by step how you solved this? I only had one year of very basic algebra and I would like to learn it now.
dayumdayumdayum
(5x-20=3x+50) -> (5x=3x+70) -> (2x=70) -> x=35
Lamplovesme
Thank you for taking the time to break it down, prepare for upvotes!
dayumdayumdayum
Haha, thanks! I'm a teacher (not math though) so just doin' my job!
dayumdayumdayum
Basically, bring the numbers to one side by adding twenty to both sides (that makes the 20s cancel out on one side)
dayumdayumdayum
then subtract 3x from the other side (to put the Xs together)
dayumdayumdayum
Then divide the whole thing by 2 to get X by itself. You're left with x=35. And that's how you do it!
drita247
Did you need a calculator?
harte
Nope, the perks of being a math major =)
drita247
Math is lovely
harte
I agree!!!
drita247
To some extent ofc.
ShitFactory
If you can't do that math...
undercoverAhole
I don't feel like I've been out of school long enough to have forgotten this, but I have. I'll be brushing up on algebra now.
Faylom
Over a thousand people on imgur thanked him for solving that for them. Crazy world
LoneDirewolf
I came here to laugh, not to do math and cry about said math skills
SoOddICantEven
or lack there of.
harte
I'm a math major so I figured I would help people out
HeyCasButt
I'm a chemistry major I no english too good but math well yes.
Flyndaran
I'm a Laziness major, so...
HeyCasButt
Hey, that's my minor!
CanadiansWilllRule
MILES OR KILOMETRES
Itrytojustbrowseforfunnystuff
It wasn't specified. Units would be the correct identifier.
marsgoose
Parsecs
HeyCasButt
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/7/73/Sonicchannel_tails_cg.png
DragonOnSteroids
Beard-Seconds
Kidiri
But are we talking 35km/h or 35 weird American units?
TheStoatMcGoats
Nuttin' but 'Murican units here, it's 56 of your commieters.
marsgoose
HAHA, my arbitrary units are better than yours, HAHAH silly Americans
CornCobMcGee
but metric units are all incredibly well calculated. only Imperial is arbitrary. based off barley seeds.
marsgoose
Meric is based on the size of the earth and density of water.... Nowdays metric and imperial are caluculated from the same concepts.
marsgoose
I live in a metric country and use both systems. I only dislike politics involved in measuremnt systems, which doesn't fit in 140 chars.
somethingprofound
How did you arrive at that answer? Not for me, I definitely already know, but I just think other people are probably curious is all...
WhyDoIOnlyWantIceCreamWhenImCold
(5x-20=3x+50) = (5x-3x=50+20) = (2x=70) = (x=35) Just bring like terms together and stuff. Bringing them over switches signs.
harte
What he said
ihaxr
And for the incredibly lazy http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=5x+-+20+%3D+3x+%2B+50
NinjaTroii
Fuck. I forgot how to do that so commenting for later. Thank you! I learned this in like 3rd grade so it's been a while...
WhyDoIOnlyWantIceCreamWhenImCold
No problem! Always good to keep this stuff in mind.
WhatthefuckamIseeing
Not how I learnt or did it. I did (5x-20=3x+50) so, (3x+70=5x), minus 3x from both sides to give (2x=70), divide by 2.
beautyinthorns
Fuck, I was 5 off... I accidentally said 50+20=80... I am extremely tired though... :/
somethingprofound
Ah true, I haven't had to do any sort of math in about 6 years and totally forgot. I mean other people probably forgot or something.
HighlySmileyJade
What if the kid in he bedsheet just couldn't afford a real costume?
[deleted]
[deleted]
toyo12
Good grief....
Mokisan
"I got a candy bar!" "I got a popcorn ball!" "I got a rock..." One of my favorite bits.
CalvinandHobbitses
I was looking for this comment. Thank you
aykyle
I don't even understand not giving him candy. If he was young enough and attempted a costume, give him candy. Who the fuck cares?
IAlwaysPupvoteDog
I think they were referencing Charlie Brown?
aykyle
haha now that you mention it, you are right. It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, IIRC. He got a rock from every house. How can I forget.
MobileUserGundam
Guys... it's a direct reference to Charlie Brown.
TeenGirlSquad
At first I thought it was "holy sheet!"
GeeUknit
Exactly. My neighbour kid came to ask if I had a mask for him. Worrying about costumes is the last thing on his parents mind. Not his fault
khaleesimotherofkittycats
This is exactly what I thought after reading that one. I believe everyone who comes to my door deserves candy if they're not assholes.
Bellusros
I believe it was a reference to Charlie Brown for the Great Pumpkin cartoon.
SoOddICantEven
But what if his costume was the Holy Ghost?
Eowyneb
he could of gone as charlie brown on halloween! he had a sheet with holes in it!! if I got the rock I would of thrown it at his window.
KeatonTS
I had to make a costume out of a paper plate and colored pencils.
TheLittleFlyingDutchGirl
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tIhwITwhSg there you go :P
Imaybegotthis
Soot on your face and be a boxer.
TheRicM
Soot is fucking expensive
CanadiansWilllRule
Or just light a few matches, blow them out, and bam soot
TheRicM
Matches are fucking expensive, then you're just gonna blow them out like that?
BorderlineBoozehound
If you're not black, burn the end of a cork, apply it all over your face and put on a ton of red lipstick. Cheap costume for all ages!
fiera
Bedsheet full of holes is still better than my teenage nephews - one wore a Deadmau5 knit hat, the other just a plastic mask.
Mewrulez99
That one made me sad, because I'm just not good at making costumes, and I was that kid once. I always had a really low self esteem.
itwastheninjas
then they make their own. go hard or go home. (this is what I do because I can't afford real costume either :'( )
cerealcomma
IT WAS A CHARLIE BROWN REFERENCE PEOPLE CALM DOWN
anglophilestymie
I'm thinking that one's a joke, Charlie Brown style. Hopedfully.
kindsoberandfullydressed
I thought (and now hope) this too.
MobileUserGundam
Huzzah, someone gets the joke.
LonLonRanchDressing
yea that one kind of made me sad. he was alone and in a shitty costume. just give the poor guy a twizzlers
Kaselehlia
:( i agree.
gourdshavemorefun
I was taking this way too literally I thought she put a rock in his butt and I was so confused.
[deleted]
[deleted]
LonLonRanchDressing
of course! how could I have forgotten Charlie Brown? But just in case: always give the kid a Twizzlers
GetSchwifty
Twizzlers? Might as well have given him the rock.
SmeesNotVeryGoodTwin
Might as well have given him candy; he's going to be lying awake at night asking philosophical questions anyway.
Idownvotewhenyousayplus1
I don't understand what was wrong with it having a bunch of holes.
[deleted]
[deleted]
Idownvotewhenyousayplus1
yeah, I don't remember lots of that comic series/show/movies etc. but thank you for telling me.
MobileUserGundam
I tend to assume if there's some sort of extraneous detail like that, usually it's a reference to something or another.
Idownvotewhenyousayplus1
yeah, I just wanted to know
CaylaMaritime
The...holey ghost?
Idownvotewhenyousayplus1
ohhhhhhhhh