sleeperkid
30849
1052
28
Jul 23, 2026 8:25 PM
sleeperkid
30849
1052
28
Jimthebutler
A real "alpha male" doesn't concern himself with the howls of his cannibal neighbor, buddy. Good luck, and I hope you can't sleep. You deserve every bit of the discomfort im certain you are exaggerating for sympathy. I wonder how those girls you abused felt you sorry sack of shit.( this message is for Andrew taint)
MarkSoupial
"I'm being trafficked" said the human trafficker
lightfoot2
cool
chefsoda
My lastest book addresses in detail how people like me have no voice, and how our message is censored from reaching the public.
Myotragus
Did Armie Hammer get picked up for something?
Nukls
/gallery/because-andrew-sounds-more-alpha-yQxH437#i0zd1KL
Kenbamazingbutprobablywontbe
So hes right at home?
SuperfluousMeh
Well, I hope that fucking cannibal eats him.
HeHeHebieJeebies
Hoping the cannibals screaming is to cover the sound he makes while tunneling into tates cell.
FlemReid
Oh dear. Anyways....
FiftyShadesOfTiramisu
He and his brother definitely shouldn't have contact with the outside world. Among other crimes, they're facing 19 charges for possession of child pornography. Why are they allowed internet access? So they can procure and spread more? Maybe groom a kid online? Take their phones away and don't let them access a computer for the duration of their sentence.
EggFooYung
He's a fucking liar.
SirDucken
TAKE. HIS. FFFFFUCKING!!! PHONE. AWAY.
Subsound
A cannibal thay screams seems better company than a pedo and dude that kidnaps women to human traffick them.
MaybeIllDisappear
For a manly man he sure bitches a lot
SeriousYouCantBeShirley
Isn't he British? I mean, it's not neighbor. It's neighbour. Fucking pedo
trythebleucheese
Yeah, that doesn't add up
bananabonanza3
GOOD
DrewThe3DPrinterGuy
Fingers crossed that cannibal fuckin eats Tate.
ChicksDigTrucks
In that order, too.
kadaeux
Plot twist. The "cannibal" is just the guards taking turns at night to make his life miserable.
MissMittens
This is hilarious
TheVampireDante
"Prisoner CNB1 has been admitted to the infirmary with a severe case of food poisoning, the world wishes him well"
spiderjohn36
TChallaVanDam
Perfect. Bravo.
LucianKane
Tate has nothing to worry about, he's an Alpha male... So the cannibal will have to do what he says... Right... RIGHT!?!?!
Yellowchopsticks
What did the cannibal do to deserve that?
keelindsey
Good behavior? It has to be better than prison food.
SalmonTheWise
Eat people I presume.
LaffertyDanie1
This guy has a chance to make the funniest last meal request of all time
Pliskin008
And his brother Tristan too.
criticalmassdriver
I mean what about second breakfast.
philmoregraves
Is the cannibal in the room with us now?
PrecogFrogOnALog
No. He's in tate's cell
Dannyalcatraz
Tell him he can have Tate, for Tots.
LeifHietala
"I don't eat junk food. "
TrumpRapesAndEatsChildren0002
Nah, even cannibals have standards. One of them: No junkfood.
SalmonTheWise
You are what you eat.
BonkyMcBonkface
Maybe you could say they have better taste.
TrumpRapesAndEatsChildren0002
I don't know, i never tried one.
SavageDrums
Nah, I'm happier to see him spend the next 460 years in prison.
Thatguywhodidthething
That's a disgusting thing to insinuate.... Cannibals eat humans not piles of dog shit.
FrancsTireur
I say one year off his sentence for every piece of Tate he eats.
MissMittens
I hope the cannibal's critique of Taint's taste goes viral so everyone gets to know how chewy and rancid he tastes.
joshjw454
Probably give him the shits.
arewenotkingsandqueenstogether
He obviously just had someone post this for him.
TheVillageGrouch9000
Frobizzle
Probably, which still makes him full of shit. "No visits."
I doubt he'd prefer to be in genpop anyway.
nintendolunchbox
Little man Tate must be loving the accommodations. The trump family isn't saving him this time. If the tweet is real , I'll just assume he had someone do it from a phone call.
GratuaCuun
Didn't know he was bunking with his brother
DC1123
Oh that sucks. I liked that name.
dynamojoe
The register number checks out! https://www.bop.gov/inmateloc/
GratuaCuun
The sudden realization he's throwing shade at his brother without wanting to come right out 😆
xj4low
Emory...
TheDreadPirateMontoya
Named after the board, because he's fucking abrasive.
chansuke
Named after his dad, who could have actually been a pretty prominent chess player if he wasn't a fucking abusive nut job.
NotSinceTheAccidend
His initials are EAT? How quaint
SkinnerTBD
For some reason, I don't think he's getting the same treatment this guy got... https://www.courthousenews.com/11th-circuit-likely-to-toss-6m-award-to-miami-man-wrongfully-accused-of-terrorism/
usernametakenisthestoryofmylife
So, life sucks for him so badly right now, that he can text about it?
PlayerBhatin
I heard the Cannibal was a pretty cool guy.
MrSwissroll
That's a weird way of saying his cell has a mirror...
00110001001110010011100000110100
He wanted a minor...
friendsofsandwiches
That doesn't sound very much like Hannibal.
BlackTrashTiger
TheVampireDante
I'd like to think that if Dr Lector was shown tate he's just glare at the warden and say "You can't be serious, I am not eating that..."
friendsofsandwiches
Actual Hannibal (shia lebuff) would just convince him to take his own life.
xmaneds
thank you SleeperKid for posting. //// my message to Andrew Tate (not that he would ever read this): "hey DICKBAG, YOU are the one who KIDNAPPED and TRAFFICKED and IMPRISONED and RAPED young girls -- HOW DOES IT FEEL, YOU LIVING PIECE OF SHIT?" . ... i.e. this fate of being locked up is exactly what he did to young girls, so this is absolutely for sure what he deserves, every day forever. then when he dies and goes to Hell, should continue for Eternity
furballsoffury
Needed to be said
BlackTrashTiger
cousteau
Ngl I miss these.
bippityboppitybuttsex
Fun Fact, he thinks you are stupid enough to believe it, and for the incels that worship him, they are.
bippityboppitybuttsex
Sorry, i want to correct a grievous error I made with this comment.
Andrew Tate does not think we are stupid; he knows very well that his comment is asinine and full of dumbfuckery. He also knows that this comment is not for us, we are not the intended audience. Those incels are... and they will believe every word of his victimhood for a crime he is almost guaranteed to have committed, repeatedly.
QuartzPoker
It's possible he had his lawyers post this, too
bippityboppitybuttsex
Maybe... also, the only reason they would move him into the SHU is if he was a danger to others or was in imminent danger himself.... or he fucked around and found out.
QuartzPoker
Guessing off of what I know about him, it took him all of five minutes to fuck around and put himself in imminent danger.
bippityboppitybuttsex
Federal holding is not like a state prison... people tend to be on pretty good behavior since there is a mix of tax fraud dudes and international narco traffickers and serial child rapists like Tate... my guess is that is why trump got him released from a Romanian prison and brought back here (he was born here...)
beelzebob23
"No contact with the outside world." Yet he has a smart phone?
barbarian818
suuup[er tiny phones are a surprisingly popular category on Amazon. You can get feature phones roughly the size of a Bic lighter. Making them quite easy to smuggle in. I just don't know how they recharge them. https://www.amazon.com/tiny-cell-phones/s?k=tiny+cell+phones
BoogiesOogie
As someone who has unfortunately frequented some of this country’s wonderful state sponsored “inns”, you are not getting access to xitter let alone internet until you’ve at least been arraigned and or sentenced. Holding, especially “SHU” or solitary can’t even see a TV, doesn’t have lunch in the Caf or communal space, doesn’t have “yard time”… just enrichment in your enclosure. Although, Tate seems like the type of guy that would boof a phone for no reason.
morganfreemanslarynx
Boof a phone....now some of y'all have never heard of boofing. Well played sir, should be called tickling the tate now.
BoogiesOogie
I will boof that compliment!
imjustagurl87
American justice at its finest.
philmoregraves
No no no, we could do sooooo much better. This is american justice at mids best
EverythingYourMotherWarnedYouAbout
Too true, and you should not have been downvoted. I've had a dear friend for over twenty years who is a lawyer and he'll tell you what an absolute mess our justice system is. And our prisons are corrupt. If there was true justice, we wouldn't be hearing from Andrew Tate, except through his lawyer.
chewmaca2
I was more impressed with the "highest level of security which exists" part. Yet they are not in CECOT nor Guantanamo and he somehow smuggled in a phone.
crazyspelling
Secure Housing Units are primarily meant for inmates who are at a very high risk of getting stabbed. It's for their security, not ours. Sometimes super dangerous people get put in SHU because they can't stop stabbing others, but that's pretty rare, I believe.
ShinksAvoHazaar
I’d polymarket there are darker and deeper places
barbarian818
That shouldn't even be a bet. The CIA has so many black site prisons and holding facilities that they have their own wikipedia page. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CIA_black_sites
Arbitrarynamehere
Is polymarket a verb now
101Medic
Not if we all agree that it isn't. Kalshi you it won't work, though.
IhopeUgetwhatUvoted4
Tells his lawyer what he wants posted.
QuartzPoker
This. He will still have contact with his lawyers if he's anywhere with even the slightest amount of decency.
DukeDarkwood
I thought he was in the U.S., though.
Or did we actually extradite him to the UK like they asked? Doesn't seem like something the Regime would do (especially since it's not even illegal to refuse extradition... anywhere).
QuartzPoker
The US still has a small amount of decency. It's microscopic at this point, but it's still there.
DukeDarkwood
If there's any in our prison or judicial systems these days, it's very microscopic indeed. We need one of them electron microscopes to see it.
There's still decency in a lot of our people, but our systems are broken, mostly by design. Many of them in such ways that it makes it hard for the decent people to do anything.
chansuke
He got shoved to the UK. We need to keep those extradition treaties alive so Trump can import prominent brown people to prosecute. Besides, Tate is part African American so it's not going to upset the die hard maga people to send him somewhere outside of the country. I'm glad Britain at least admitted they dropped the fucking ball into the center of the earth when they initially had the chance to prosecute him.
canigifinpaint
"My life is ruined and I'm the victim in this situation!" /sent from my iphone/
gablestout
Feralkyn
Haaaaa
SlayerOfGoat
He had it shoved up his ass at all times in case he got arrested. A charger too.
Shift137
Nah he hid it in his chin hole.
Trankia12
It’s like a bag of holding up in there.
BastardMan1977
SirBonSama
he has a very big prison basket
CrisprCAS
And some cigars, a change of clothes, an extra pair of shoes, his laptop, his car keys, and a handle of booze.
Alexap30
Oh, so that's why he had to remove fabric from his pants.
Starlatan
All of it easy to reach with his head up in there.
darkoshen
And a violet shirt, too.
Vungor
Hey Vegeta...nice shirt.
spiderjohn36
"The human rectum is nightmarishly elastic." Patton Oswalt doing his Robert Evans bit.
BoogiesOogie
He put a whole Dodge up there!?!? Actually… yeah that tracks, with those slutty little ankles
CUNTDESTROY3R
cousteau
Cronenberg charger
imemewhatimeme
I don't know why I'm asking this... Where's the sound?
bolobass
https://media3.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1djhtdDNhMnI2eGJnZWZwbW55OWozYWVvcHUyc2tiZDBnZmUybmxqYiZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/1zgOBEmZk2M8vSJxqD/200w.webp
Malak224
Nobody is asking to borrow that charger.
PostalHeathen
rbudrick
Several of them. In case he loses one.
MotoCanuck
Not a charger, a battery bank. Big one.
SlayerOfGoat
He's gotta recharge the bank eventually, so he's probably got both up there. I'm sure he's got room for them.
TELunus
Like a Dodge Charger, or a horse?
SlayerOfGoat
A player from the Los Angeles football team the Chargers, who also had a phone charger.
TELunus
That poor man, I'd hate to be smuggled in Emory's ass
cousteau
Where does he plug it? Oh wait, generator up his ass?
DukeDarkwood
No. Usual charging socket. With a USB cable. Leading right to the phone.
cousteau
Do they have USB sockets in prison, or does he have one of those shoved up his ass too?
Laser2000
socket, power cable, usb cable, one of these power to usb adapters, various tools to do electrical work, maybe a drill, tools to cut up the wall and fix it later, my hopes and dreams, world peace, probably all up there somewhere in his ass
HamAdvocate
You can tell what kind of phone a prisoner has by the shape of their bar of soap. When the phone is in circulation, the soap goes in the wallet to keep things elastic.
prosper020
I wish it was ten seconds ago when I hadn’t read this.
SnoiD
And the wallet being….? You know what, don’t answer that
barstr7
I don't know how you've escaped learning what a prison wallet is thus far friend but trust me when I say you should keep not knowing.
tasthesose2
They issue everyone a wallet when you get to prison to hold your raffle tickets and commissary bucks. JK it’s your asshole used a purse
DukeDarkwood
We don't need to. You already know.
cousteau
TacoPoweredHelicopter
Maybe he is sending the message from a fridge?
Evenmoreuselessname
Lol the Internet connected appliance no one asked for
cousteau
One of them, at least.