Lanhdanan
121742
1590
60
Jan 14, 2022 12:28 PM
Lanhdanan
121742
1590
60
Elroydb
Guarantee this kid is 16 and is a communist because they want to abolish bedtime and homework
Grillparzer
Here's a word about jails. All of them suck. Some might be better than others, but they all suck.
DiDaVinci
The Norwegians put bar codes on their warships so they can scan da navy in.
bushpotato
No, actually you don't. You're making an exaggerated comparison for the sake of being sensationalist.
skittlesbane
I think about this every f*cking day. I wish I could afford the trip.
CompressedInfo
Better commit a pretty heinous crime, or you'll be turfed out in only a few years
AGRIADR
Just say something bad about Herring, in the slammer you go!!
hotrodny
https://youtu.be/zNpehw-Yjvs
heller8790
What now? No way, magnesium BOXERS!!!! This is some DNA undergarments I for once can’t meet those pre- requisite!
Acarus
Sorry, you will just be extradited back to the states.. ?
djangojazz
Just say Big Bang sucks as loud as possible and see what happens.
Kingstad
people will assume you mean the show and agree
CorgisButtsDriveMeNuts
LOL free in the US
pohohthepanda
I'd rather be a fish than continue to live in trumpland
CommanderHamDemander
This would make a great bumper sticker!
loopthegif
But what if they don’t reoffend? How do Norway keep their supply of cheap labour??
wrinklyflute
CabFran
Don’t forget the sex 3 times a day
grandpasonlylivingheir
After 73 years I've never felt that I wanted someone to take care of me. I've had hard times, so I moved. I was poor so I changed what I 1/2
grandpasonlylivingheir
I did to try to get better. I've gone bankrupt twice. Only now do i have a little savings. A little. But live in a cell? You are so naive.
damogen
The trick is that in Norway it is also nice to live outside of jails.
theworldcouldbeflat
Really if you're American you probably qualify as a refugee in a lot of countries 1/2
theworldcouldbeflat
Just make sure your choice doesn't write countries into their refugee laws and you probably qualify, definitely diabetics, minorities..
Mpete
...wanted for a crime so heinous that you risk a death peanøtt.
Mpete
PENALTY...damn auto correct.. peanøtt=peanut btw
theworldcouldbeflat
That would keep you alive but probably still in Jail.
danishjuggler21
Plot twist, get deported back to US and get thrown in prison
JustAnotherVictimOfAmbientMorality
Recently the Danish navy set some pirates free on a boat w/ food as they thought putting them in danish prisons might incentivize piracy.
donorkort
That's... a fourth of the story. The real reason is that Ghana refused to take them, so they'd have to be tried in Denmark ->
donorkort
> and with Ghana already refusing to take them, we'd be stuck with them forever.
donorkort
Couple this with Danish prison sentences being ridiculously short, this convicted pirate would be out on the street in few years.
UneventfulLover
The British avoid arresting pirates for the same reason since their laws says pirates shall go on trial in London.
Mpete
I guarantee that if you come to Norway you will not find a single person who ever met a troll. That's how dangerous they are.
spitfires2000
You go to Norway and say, out loud and in public "Those trolls of yours are NOT REAL!" Straight to jail you go!
Datnorwegian
We are coming for you!!
miasmamma
N0S4A2
TexMexHex
Wait.....Trollhunter isnt a documentary?
spitfires2000
Awesome docu... movie!
v
UneventfulLover
Well that would elicit a 'talking to' by the Troll Security Service and very little is known about their holding facility.
LisaSimps0nsDr3aM
Just read out loud a GQP pamphlet at immigration … you will straight go to jail for a hate crime there /s
bananaramana
Norwegian here, can confirm.
Kij22
What would burning down churches in the name of black metal get me?
amishjosh
An album deal
hotrodny
Even if you say "you horse cock" to a police in Trondheim, he will not arrest you :)
Richter12x2
The problem is, people in Norway are so nice, it'd be hard to do something bad enough to anyone to go to jail.
PcJunky
Straight to your own countries jail though. Have fun with that
Inarticulated
"Sweden is way better than Norway" Boom. Jail.
TotallyNotFakeFacts
"Norway is better than Sweden" boom. Jail. But in Sweden, which is not as nice but still OK as far as jails go.
FlatPlutoSociety
Either that or some nine-foot-tall blonde guy just steps on you.
STGxDante
Don't tempt these ppl. They got out of control with the giant woman from Resident Evil Village.
PudgyPigeon
Possboi
Please, our sexuality is "Tall"
SlaaneshiBreastEnthusiast
Nah, for that, you get a visit from Olaf, the Scandinavian Strangler.
TheGrumpyViking
Look up "blood eagle"
Perkunas687
Promise?
Oniloke
Bonk.jpg
Gayforbae
HeraldOfTheBadger
Our whatever the guy version is of sploosh ... which i guess is still just sploosh... but with semen
SergeiBoobtitsky
UnrealDreamer
I thought Olaf was a snowman?
ArgJargon
... There is more than one Olaf.
Targe0
He's a man of many skills and hobbies.
danishjuggler21
Overcook herring? Jail. Undercook herring, jail.
surelyoneoftheseusernamesisavailable
Pickle the herring.
DigiT00l
Perfectly cooked herring? Also jail because that is suspicious
ZimKat
Lol
iamthugnasty
You forgot that the general public in the us are essentially already slave labor.
TheAngryMarineBiologist
As opposed to the prison population in the US that are literally slave labor.
Gonnaderpya
Look, life in the US pisses me off, but we're not at slavery levels, and to say so ignores the actual hardships of it.
Targe0
Ok the US is after civil war levels of Freed Slaves labour. You get paid but its not really enough to live on for many people.
Rookie8286
“EveRyOnE iN tHe Us aRe AlreaDY slaVes”. Great perspective you have on actual slavery.
iamthugnasty
I mean... actually slaves had food, shelter, and basic needs met including health care because they were valued. Not treated well, but seen
iamthugnasty
As an investment. Here we don't even get those met working full time with benefits. Most of the people I know don't get medical/dental work
iamthugnasty
Done because it would bankrupt them. I know people working full time who have had their power and water shut off at the same time.
iamthugnasty
I'm not saying that the slaves had it easy or good. I'm saying they had their basic needs met. And many Americans don't.
[deleted]
[deleted]
buttfullofluckycharms
We're literally undergoing a seditious coup while trying to root out the treason that's made progress impossible the past 60 years. STFU ?
iamthugnasty
Have you seen the way politics work here. Republicans have been making democracy and change nearly impossible for years.
nukesontheway
No cause when a slave got hurt the master had an interesting in their healthcare because the slave was an investment. Workers can be fired.
nukesontheway
Interest*
iamthugnasty
Good point. Here they try everything in their power to not take care of you.
AsAHistorian
Uh you guys it might be diminishing the actual horrors of slavery to say that modern-day job-having is in any way worse than chattel slavery
nukesontheway
It wasn’t all chattel. Especially in America. In fact if you’ve heard the phrase being sold up the river… that was a threat to sell a slave
nukesontheway
To a chattel plantation where their quality of life would be significantly lower then their current situation in a non chattel bondage
AriaYuki
So, that'd be like being forced to take a job at an Amazon warehouse to afford food/shelter?
parkerh17
Yeah, doesn't feel too far off from indentured servitude though.
MrNardtastic
Solid plan. You'll also have free health care. No chance of getting shot either.
wtforero
As a person who’s been shot at, that’d be nice.
ahachoo
These times, I swear. When you said shot, I thought whoa, Norway isn’t vaccinating prisoners?
MrNardtastic
Lol no that would be a plus in my book. And it's mainly just "these times" in the US sadly
Ryanator50
your chances of getting shot in norway are low, but never zero. same for canada (Likelyhood of getting shot in canada doubles in Ontario)
MechaNinja
The chance of getting shot is never 0%. It is certainly lower there than here in the states, but it's never nil.
crazyspelling
It can be reaaaaaly close to nil though.
MechaNinja
Oh yeah absolutely. Don't get me started.
rbudrick
Ander Breivik has entered the chat.
MrNardtastic
Enlighten me please
rbudrick
Racist asshole who shot and killed many innocents in Norway.
ArghhhMyGroin
This is the comment I was looking for.
Felberin
Unless you are politically inclined kid on an island. That seems to drastically increase chances of being shot
N0S4A2
This one time at political camp.
zenoshogun
The odd of both being in prison and be a politically inclined kid on an island aren't that high.
CountMontagueDub
But never zero
crlhmltn
You'll get an education to.
tattoogigolo
To what? Don’t leave us hangin’.
crlhmltn
Mechanical, electrical, carpentry. In one prison they have a studio to make music. And I'm pretty sure you can do a lot of college courses.
MrNardtastic
Too*
crlhmltn
I see. Make fun of the non native English speaker. ?
crlhmltn
But now I understood.
masteryoplait
Everyone has an opinion without ever traveling. While I love NO, the long cold & grey of winter tests your fortitude even when free.
UnBobaLievable
Makes you understand why Jól was such a pivotal celebration for the ancient peoples.
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
I like winter. My eyes are sensitive to light and I'm pale so I burn easily. I wouldn't mind a longer winter. It gets colder than /1
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
Oslo where I live now. And their summers aren't sweltering like ours, so that would be another plus. /2
Sahrelli
Those are my favorite kind of days. I miss the perma night in Iceland's winter
Kringon
Nah, get a good gaming-rig and u are set.
OwMyRupturedSpleen
The long cold grey winters are one of the reasons I love living here.
jekath
As a Dane - the dark winters will get you. I'm still not used to it and I'm almost 50.
masteryoplait
Same here. The saving grace in those places is that at least you have decent laws. I love Lima, Perú as it has so much freedom & perfect
masteryoplait
weather but not much justice or good laws, so we get to pick what fits our preferences.
Dilldall
Dont you have indoor lightning? The darkness is just annoying in that it limits what outside work i can do in the winter
Aryaforthewin
But those long summer nights are something special too
jekath
I don't have words for how much I love those nights in June. Absolutely wonderful.
Haemaelaeinen
I love the heart of winter, when it is all white and black and silvery when the full moon shines on the virgin snow.... That is bliss.
Haemaelaeinen
And in 5pm or so.
IOnlyFavoriteDickButtAndImNotEvenMad
Psh. Ohio would like a word.
Respectablecrazy
Agreed. I live in eu-from usa- and the posts from usa are unrealistic and even silly at times regarding what they think life is like here.
grhope
You guys don't have universal healthcare, inexpensive college, guaranteed paid parental leave, and 30+ vacation days?
Dilldall
We sure do, well 25 days vacation unless you are 60+. Guy above have no idea how lucky we are.
SatanTheAlmighty
Nothing beats a good, white, Northern Norwegian winter with northern lights and 1.5 deep snow. Lived here all my life and won't leave.
masteryoplait
To each their own. As animals humans are amazing in how many climates we love! Suck it gorillas!
KlatnYelox
God I miss the long winters in northern Wisconsin. Give me Norway, and let dummy bad with languages me live there
AeroEngineer
Very envious
BortymcBortfeis
1.5 meter deep snow? Do you live in the Mountain?
StormtrooperFKD47
No? Its not unusual with that much.
BortymcBortfeis
Where?
SatanTheAlmighty
Troms, Norway. The recorded snow depth record is 2.4 meters in my town. What a brilliant year that was!
APointlessBee
Yeah, one time it rained for like... 2 wks in texas and I was literally in a bad mood. Idk why ppl live up north (in the US at least).
HenryLongfellowIII
On the plus side there are a lot fewer things (humans and suicidal deer aside) trying to kill us.
TallyReign
Having spent a year in Texas (in and around San Antonio) idk why people live in Texas and not other parts of the habitable South, with trees
jiicorBaron
Tornadoes. Living in north Texas about 10 years, and tornados usually start in the south.
APointlessBee
I really liked the weather of Tennessee. Now THAT longitude is the sweet spot. Wife missed the fam in dallas tho.
covideokilledtheradiostar
We don't like Scorpions. That and the remnants of the confederacy still alive and well in the mindsets of many southern politicians. But
covideokilledtheradiostar
mainly the scorpions.
APointlessBee
Man i aint seen a scorpion since i was 6 and ppl told me they'd crawl in my shoes... Which i think they were pulling my leg but still...
JustSomePersonThere
Fuck your bullshit ass state. And yes the pot has every right to call your kettle ass black. (Floridian here)
APointlessBee
Uhhhhh.... ok? I hope your day gets better after reading my comment..
JustSomePersonThere
I hope so too, and I genuinely hope your day and weekend goes well. I have no problem with you personally. I just loathe your stat, so it’s
JustSomePersonThere
bitterly ironic that someone would want to live there instead of further north. Same for my state.
poormilk
Guessing you haven't left Texas much
APointlessBee
I have. Close to half the states and I can't live in the areas that have perpetual cloud coverage... Which is what the NO dude was saying.
poormilk
thats fair, people do really under estimate how dark and shitty Norways winters are.
APointlessBee
Wife and I wanted to move to chicago till the angriest person i met was like "Why wtf? Rain clouds all year? It'll change a man..."