thedanquansaga
1016712
39950
598
The one that started it all...
Sorry for the repeat of a few of these comments.
And from there...
This one's from ThisIsOnlyMyFifthAccount, but I couldn't screenshot it
BUT WHERE IS THE TUBA?
Obviously I'm missing a few posts, but these were my favorites.
And now thanks to @thunder424 we have a webcomic
http://imgur.com/gallery/9fQ3smP
MRW I finished putting all this together
UPDATE: Now someone has stolen my toaster. I am not okay with this.
SilentPhil
I love imgur
IHaveAFetishForReallyLongUsernamesSoIMadeThisOneToTurnMeOn
http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/92/49/9e/92499e34cc96fd56e607e1cae488f020.jpg
widgieqoio
My husband came home from work and said "I haven't been on imgur in two days. What the fuck is happening!?" I tried to explain
theplasticpaddy
HeartLies
Thanks, OP! Now can you explain the 3:32 am lawn masturbating?
MasterOfMyUniverse
http://imgur.com/22E6fHR
PvtHudsn
Why take the toaster?
LainTime
I would love to see some data from the imgur office. Like the traffic compared to other days and things like that.
InnocentValley
People going through posts: Is it Danquan? No? Next. Is this Danquan? Yes? Upvote.
parker8990
I live in Bloomington, I want to find op and congratulate him on his successful fake Internet point scheme.
jgeezy
I used to work in the Check 'N Go in Bloomington
catpr0m
Bloomingtonians unite.
ArthurDentsannoyingalterego
I don't want to brag, but I have the first edition of all of these, I reckon that'll be worth millions in 50 years or so...
poochyfruitland
Millions of fake internet points?
Efreeti
@thedanquansaga - You missed a TON of half-updates and info.
InnocentValley
Would you be so kind? I went to sleep some time ago, I think I did too.
Efreeti
He responded to his own update comments, check it out
InnocentValley
Oh god.. I'll never get that plum jam done. I think I'll just quit from this danquan saga now and wait for more post like this.
TheDeceptiveBanana
This is even more exciting than #rooftopbreakup
OmNachoMama
But the video of #rooftopbreakup up is amazing
SarahFinee
This is really awesome ! This story (as sad as it is to be 16 & pregnant from a guy named dan with a father that steals toaster) is great !
cyanide68
I died at "with a father that steals toaster". All nice and serious, then I nearly spat my coffee out.
goingonanadventure
Hey, I live in Bloomington! I feel so close to the action.
x7j6
I'm near Muncie...so I have the same sentiments.
HaydenD
IU?
goingonanadventure
Half IU/ half the job.
catpr0m
I too live in Bloomingtonnnn!
ThatOnePearlGirl
It's awesome. I like seeing something from my town override the front page.
Studoku
And while the whole world was distracted by Danquan, Scotland tried to escape.
InnocentValley
Yeah how is that one going? Know anything?
Studoku
It was close (about 55-45) but Scotland voted to remain in the UK.
InnocentValley
Ahhdamn. Oh well. I'm sure they have their reasons.
kirkfollower24
Life is good in Scotland, and England promised them all the power.
InnocentValley
It's only that I was hoping for a different outcome. I'm sure they each did what they thought was best. I'm only a friend from far away.
Agent670
Why did this guy reveal his lifes issues and get so much upvotes for it?! Is it made up? Is it just cause the guys name is Dan?!
OmNachoMama
Entertainment
LurkerModeDeactivated
I am waiting for the day he says "hey guys... ilied.gif."
Lyrahani
I think we all just needed this to happen now... :D
WafflesMcGee
Did you not read it?
thisheretexasdude
Social media experiment for his PhD. thesis.
suktupbutterkup
Danquan, there fixed it for you.
Skreamie
The equivalent to soap operas and reality TV shows
Aramahn
The world may never know. But at least we'll be able to say we were there man. We were there.
AvsJoe
I can't say I was there from the beginning, I arrived after the Jimmy John's, but I can say I was there too. What a ride.
NomDePlumage
I'll always remember where I was when the news broke.
coppergod
Be sure to remember where you are when the water breaks, then.
MoccaFixer
This story is like pizza. When it was fresh was good. Now after two days is still pretty good.
bigpileofpun
Thank for clarifying its DANquan and not DAquan... Get it together danquan.
bringingclawstoagunfight
It's Daquan, that's what the original OP had taken to calling him.
Nobodyn0se
Great summary. Favorited to post for people who ask what's going on.
thatsjustcake
Okay. So now that everyone is caught up can we fucking get over it now?
illJustPutTheFireOverHereWithTheRestOfTheFire
I was wondering what was going on earlier, but then I found this :3
GoogleFucker
Agreed, I'm legitimately laughing at this, and desperately trying not to make any noise
PacZeterson
He's an imgur historian. A histimgurian?
FoxyEllie
This guy may be the current internet celebrity, but I remember you and your kidney.
Nobodyn0se
My kidney doesn't sign autographs, so don't ask.
HAMMERHEAD5000
I'm pretty late to the game, but damn, this waaaas good
imguriaaaan
And me even later! :o And it was damn gooooood!
HAMMERHEAD5000
Well played..... your patience astounds even me.
FatElvisWasBest
In case anyone went to the bathroom today....this shit happened
MoccaFixer
This story is like pizza. When it was fresh was good. Now after two days is still pretty good.
PacZeterson
LATE LIKE ANTHONYCAPO'S SISTER
HappierThanASlinkyOnAnEscalator
HAMMERHEAD5000
i laughed harder then i should have at this. and nary a toaster to dry the tears of laughter from my face.
aggressivecuddles
please don't cry into a plugged in toaster. :(
Loraxis
its not plugged in, its a handheld.
fug1t1v3
well everyone was complaining they needed context.....this is all of it in one place
ImJustHereSoIDontGetFined
After finally having read the whole saga...I still don't give a fuck. I really don't understand why this is so popular right now.
fuckyouthen
Favoriting this post for the future
FatElvisWasBest
In a way this isn't fair bc a lot of us had to research, but still....Outfuxkingstanding job *claps*. This is truly neccessary.
dropeleven
yeah and i got yelled at when i asked for context
PacZeterson
ALL OF THE CONTEXT
BYERE
And thank OP for doing so... I've been confused by all the Danquan things, wondering what the hell it all came from and meant...
IthinkItsMe
Only now it just all makes sense. At least to me.
Deadpo0l
As someone who hasn't been on imgur, this was AMAZING
wartoaster
I'm just glad to see OTHER USERS getting points
RazgrizSeed
The updates are out of order and the "half" updates are missing. For example, how delicious the Jimmy John's was.
Macrowaveable
Deadpool movie confirmed
InfiniteSynapse
So... is it over yet?
GoodGraces
I needed it!!
ITookThisUsernameJustToBeAsFancyAsAllOthersHere
oh not all of the contex.. just check all the posts on the frontpage now, everything is about danquan and his andventures :D
DefinitelyUnaware
...aaaaand we're back!
maxdecphoenix
or they could just hit the "danquan" or anthonycapo tag, and... idk.. have everything in one place.
srymissclick
Normally someone writes "previously" , but this time nothing. I had not idea what the hell was going on imgur
SandNigga
You leave imgur for one day and this happens. Thanks OP for this compilation.. So is emily not getting married?
fug1t1v3
apparently not. she said no
SandNigga
ahh, yeah I missed that part at first..
thegriffin88
I caught half of this last night but it's great to have the full story. Also #TeamTuba
howToLoseTheGame
Forgot the actual epic grandma phone conversation
FluffyMan93
I really did need context I haven't been on Imgur for 2 days and shit blows up with Emily and Danquan
drew9000
This was helpful because I had seen every single update except the tuba one and I was so confused as to how a tuba came into this story
goingtogoeatworms
I agree!! I missed the toaster update
AlcoholicsAnonymousBYO
He says tuba, you say toaster, wth
kgirl924
Anyone who hasn't been on Imgur the past and next few days is REALLY going to need this post.
MrFBI
Ten years later and still relevant 😂
Counterfit
I'm so glad I caught it somewhat early
MnemonicMonkeys
As someone who hasn't been on Imgur for the past week due to work: I concur
delico
This whole post really helped
PinkIceFox
Just started surfing imgur and was like "Wtf is a danquan". I am so happy this post is here.
KittenDoomsday
Yes
MauricioGuaura
I HAVE been on imgur, I just ignored the first Danquan post because it used the "dis gun b gud" gif >_>U
PoisonInJest
Can confirm. Was linked today and now my toaster got stolen.
delico
I didn't realize I missed something 'til my friend called and asked "have you been on imgur lately?"
FindusSomKatten
i was searching for the origig of team toaster and this kind of stuff makes the internet arkeology a lot easier
Malkiot
I was on imgur; still missed the main post(s).
AnonymousArtist
That was me! I come back and I was like "WHAT DID I MISS". Now I feel like I know whats up now.
hiyesthisissatan
Same here. So glad to see this post.
Heartlyss
YRW:
LogeeLassleyyy
you lucky dog. this one blew up even bigger than batman masturbating in his neighbor's yard.
groversleeves
So is this the new twitch plays pokemon?
RedHeadedBambi
This is exactly what I was thinking. I've got into it just as much.
InnocentValley
If it were I wouldn't mind. You'd need background for pokemon stuff and I don't have that at all. This I can handle.
mnsu
How many teen pregnancies have you had?
InnocentValley
What's that got to do with it?
emilyaileen
....That guy just got so many fake internet points....
hardtochoose
so? problem?
USD1
Fake or not, hilarious story is hilarious.
duhbruh
SteveRB2
Then you wouldn't mind giving me yours, I'm sure =) ...ᵖᶫˢ
cinnamonster
About 260'000 points. That's gotta be some kind of record.
cinnamonster
He has 267,587 points now. It was under 100k yesterday AFTER the first post blew up. I think he earned basically all of those points in 48h.
kkus
I think the point is that they made points not just for themselves but for so many others as well. AnthonyCapo is literally a wealth creator
kkus
well, worthless point wealth but wealth nevertheless
Thorbane
I'd love to see a graph of his reputation over time.
Argonoch
plot twist, it was all a well fabricated story
Katina
Fo reals.
TheJonSnowShow
He is a hero. A savior. The one.
nickragano10
I was thinking the same thing
AreYouMadAtMeOrAreYouMadAtUrself
roughly 221K according to him
toastyy1990
And so many people leached more points off of him. I hate how the internet works, sometimes.
toastyy1990
Including the OP of this post.
hardtochoose
whats wrong with some1 getting the points
NotACanadian
Why are you so upset about it?
HeWhoWelds
And the guy that's been posting this stuff is milking it as much as he can. Example: Doing updates in comments instead of the post itself.
KeviKirb
Best way of doing it. I liked the flow.
peteyboo
To be fair that DOES give the reactions some sort of chronological flow.
KeviKirb
I would give him more if possible. They don't mean shit and he kept me entertained all day. NFL needs to hire him for play by play analysis.
AbusiveWankerVEVO
THEY'RE NOT FAKE THEY'RE JUST WORTHLESS. GOD YOU'RE ALL MORONS
TheMonsterWithinYou
Worthless you say? I will sell my imgur account for $1500 to whomever wishes to buy it. First come first serve. I have 23,000 points :( lol
ACanadianLostInAustralia
I'm going to upvote you in protest over your opinions. You brought this on yourself.
TheRicM
Except the Mormons part. Oh wait, morons? Maybe you're onto something
DuckAttack
I laughed so hard at this
TheRicM
That is surprisingly accurate
420Dongstorm
Why can't my family have a breakdown so I can get internet points??
MauricioGuaura
I should have uploaded to imgur when my brother was drunk and cut his veins...
420Dongstorm
i feel like there are a few other nore important things to be doing in that situation
MauricioGuaura
Oh, he was fiiiine! Not like he's doing much with his life anyway.
identicalWorlds
Do you have a sister?
Grumpis
No, please, don't fuck your sister.
SanSamis
If a baby eventually ensues from this mess, they should name it Imgur.
ImgurCouncilOfLlamas
No, name it Toaster.
NomDePlumage
We should send baby Imgur a plush giraffe.
x7j6
To the top of the comments with this one!
Gingerzombiehaznosoul
But it could get confusing because how would you pronounce it?
SlightlyRacistBanana69
"gif"
visgurian
Giffy John? Oh yeah, and *whoosh*
CleverClara
I'd like to point out OPs username: thedanquansaga
[deleted]
[deleted]
mariamaomoo
Lol yes
JustKindOfClever
You're so clever, clara.
RealDuva
#TEAMTUBA MOTHAFUCKERS!!
kenpokid4
Yep, for once there's a throwaway instead of whoring karma.
DanquanandEmily
Yes, Notice the T is not capitalized.
MedicalGradeHangover
myspacebarisnotworking
Thats clever of you.
TheMershedPerderder
He archived the whole thing; some resulting memes included
RichardNunez
This needs to be a movie ASAP!!
Rwhejek
There are those who await their relevancy, and then there are those who make themselves relevant.
StorytellingSalem
Still holds today. GJ @op! Never delete this post! It still gets referenced!
SaintBaronNashor
nice username :D
Phenomeno
Why is Danquan named Danquan when his name is Dan?
violentpursuit
Will someone please realize the name given to this "Dan" was "Daquan", not Danquan!!! Bugging the hell out of me
sabbywins
I'm pretty sure Danquan is a play off of an earlier post of a girl taking about her boyfriend Daquan, not what you are saying.
NiftyNips
Right. What @sabbywins said. The Daquan joke came first, then the guys name was Dan so he morphed into Danquan.
ghsdkgb
It's called a "joke", Drax
Heartlyss
http://imgur.com/UKyuAtg
9thDr
Heartlyss
You're my favie Doctor.
9thDr
CleverClara
9thDr
CleverClara
9thDr
FoxyEllie
Were I unwed, I would take you in a manly fasio-... wait, where am I?
FionaBlue
Has anyone tallied the total points gained? I'm really curious but too lazy to do it.
CleverClara
Someone posted it in usersub. The last tally I saw was around 155000
battery1979
He said > 200k when I asked him yesterday.
saffr
AnthonyCapo mentioned going from 25,000 to 125,000 in the original post... last I checked he was ~225K, so >=200K in 24 hrs.
BrotherhoodOfTheTaco
He fucking cheated by taking all the top comments for himself.
darkraix
4
Daddy3Leggs
PacZeterson
He's final relevant!
GoldenSun3DS
@anthonycapo
TheFeelsAreComing
Yes. Final.
idkwhattowriteherehelpme
@ishowupwhensomeonehasarelevantusername
firestorm79
*his
UnarmedandnotdangerousCanadian
*finally actually.
IrrelevantButPlausibleConspiracyTheories
What a coincidence!
TheWizardofTime
I just realized in the original post he is named Daquan.
scuba7jb
I know teen pregnancy happens all the time, but I don't know why this particular case was so interesting.......
ashtonsqueezes
Delivery.
R0da
It was the toaster that sealed the deal for me.
InnocentValley
Everything that happend on imgur is an accident based on pure luck. That guy got everybody elses luck for the day.
NomDePlumage
This teen pregnancy had Jimmy Johns.
KokonutBinks
It's the toaster thievery
elbart
It began with something like "my 16yr old sister wants to move in with her 17yr old boyfriend called Dan". Hilarity ensued.
AvsJoe
*EVERYTHING ensued. The whole Internet stopped for a day to see what would happen next.
somespazzoid
That red shirt gunna die
MyUserNameIsAproposOfNothing
#TeamToaster
Majubin
Toasters and tubas were involved
DistortionUltra
The Danquan incident of 2014 has finally pushed me over the edge. I was an avid lurker for almost a year. Today marks my beginning. #oneofus
turtledove929
Gooble gobble
thunder424
Me too, my good imgur. I understand how you feel, as I too was the very same. Thank you Danquan, thank you Anthony! Thank you WORLD!
craz3d
2014!? Holy shit. Wonder how the baby is.
MattFierce
I was just wondering the same thing.
TeamToasterforlife
same. this is what started my lifetime of imgur slavery
Wipwip
This is me also. What have i done?
Ironreaper091
3 year lurker and Danquan broke me like OP's sister's heart. Welcome to the club.. #gooblegobblegooglegobble
Senikko
You.... will.... never... leave............................again... #Good luck.......I mean.... umm....ONEOFUSONEOFUSONEOFUS!!!
Link007
Senikko
um lol
Link007
pls
SometimesIFallOutOfPlanes
THERE ARE DOZENS OF US!
SilentLambs
ONE OF US... ONE OF US... ONE OF US...
iamgroooot
Welcome!
sodomite
+1 for your username!
EngravedToaster
SAME.
Bigdaddyclean
gooble gobble
rand0mNPC
Me too!
sodomite
Same here.......
JimLaheyandRandy
Gooble gobble gooble gobble one of us ,one of us.
ToasterLiberationFront
For weeks I've been trying to come up with a username. My search is finally over.
StrikingUpvoteHiddenFavorite
Great name :)
Ksjohn
I'm happy you still have this name
Stevethebarbarbarbarbarian
What true joy.
westPAguy
Hasn't posted since 2016... @ToasterLiberationFront are you with us?!
911wasDigiornosnotDelivery
Doesn't look like it
cakebiatch
#TeamTuba
teamtuba4life
4life
MrOriginal
#TEAMJJ
PacZeterson
#TeamToaster
mumfix
She just wanted to play sone tuba! #TeamTuba
feathersoft
It starts with a tuba.....
iseveryusernametakenforreal
Where's this tuba coming from? I hadn't seen a tube mentioned before the hashtag.
joinha
this thread has EVERYTHING in it
cakebiatch
Update 13
iseveryusernametakenforreal
Can't believe i missed just that one.
cakebiatch
Tsk Tsk!
bumpadumpp
wow I completely missed that too! And I REALLY thought I was searching! Thanks for asking & answering @cakebiatch lol
cakebiatch
You're welcome! Glad I could help
lucidcute
Am I only 1 who thinks Dan deserves credit for proposing? It's not the smartest move-but it shows that he is not running from the situation.
Monkeyfighter
Good intentions and whatnot :|
HyperR3al
I'm with you on that. True, marriage doesn't solve anything, but it was ballsy... and fresh. I like your moves Dan.
toxcrusadr
Ball moves is what got him there in the first place.
elbart
Marrying won't change the situation one bit.
ojisama
And in the very first post they were going to move in together. And in one of the others Dan was the only one not shouting.
ojisama
Based on the whole thing, the bloody Danquan sounds like the most mature member of the whole circus.
TheRealCJ
Yeah, OP sounds like a dick "sit the fuck down, you don't deserve an opinion"
badapparu
Also OP making it out like his saintly sister had no part in making a baby, it was all evil ol' "Danquan" who caused this virgin conception.
NomDePlumage
I would have said yes, tbh.
badapparu
There are currently at least 51 others, so no you are not the only one.
toounoriginaltothinkofacleverusername
That was my feeling. They're both dumb teenagers, but at least he's willing to man up and try to support both the mother and the kid.
BowtieAskew
I'm surprised she said no. This whole thing started with her thinking she was grownup enough to move in with him.
tifalif
Marriage =/= support.
toounoriginaltothinkofacleverusername
I'm well aware, currently watching a child that isn't mine because neither parent can be bothered. It's still better than running out though
longbeast
Support is implied since you share everything, including income, in marriage. Again though... dumb teen is dumb.
tifalif
The thing is, you don't have to share all that with marriage, some people do not. I know plenty that do not share income at all.
TheRealCJ
Are you seriously suggesting he proposed as a way if getting out of being a father?
NakedByTheComputer
As someone who came into this very late; I really appreciate this. The real tragedy is the stepsister and her neglected tuba practice.
TheViper69
ONE OF US, ONE OF US
joinha
#teamtuba
RoombaTheAssaultVacuum
#teamtoaster
joinha
brrn here long, have ya?
joinha
*been
8snFail
zoneco
Tuba is a magical instriment, its a tragedy that she didnt get to practice.
ShibiSF
#TeamHannah
bob3242
i think she had enough tuba practice, isn't that how she got here?
ilikepizzza
Does your user name have anything to do with the BTBAM song?
NakedByTheComputer
Yes! they're my favorite.
ilikepizzza
Hell yeah! I have a tattoo of the arrows from The Great Misdirect. One of my favorite albums ever
WhereLBJsNutsHang
I can just imagine the look on her face.
fhqwhgus
#teamtuba, indead!
TheViper69
#teamtoaster
fhqwhgus
Lol
hughmungo
If she doesn't practice it'll end in a "Wa Waaaa". We need a better ending than that!
Druidhunter77
It’s ok I’m pretty sure I’m the latest to this party
bonahomie
Enlighten me please, what is the full tuba- part of this story?
StepRightUp
Did you even READ the post before asking questions? Or do you just have the attention span of a gnat? Oh, wait...this is Internet. NM
nooneyouwouldknow
I need insight to the tuba part too, please!
Telkesh
The best part is what song she was playing. I can't remember sadly but it was a romantic song
Twrecks123
Was it “My heart will go on”? Please tell me it was Tuba MHWGO.
DarthSuraTheSavage
step sister of OP went to room and started practicing tuba and wins worst time in the world award. IE the shit fest that is happening to OP
iRecommendBooks
I'd want nothing more than to go to my room and play tuba instead of engaging with the clusterfuck.
friendsofsandwiches
She plays the fatty walk tube music.
DarthSuraTheSavage
also see Update 13 in OP's post, also here in the beginning. read through the comments
kkus
better than me playing my rusty trombone >_>