Once dated a girl who was 45 minutes late from our second date. I didn't complain, I waited for her to say sorry. She didn't say anything about it, later I confronted her about it and she kinda dismissed it. I missed that red flag. I should have called it quits, but she was kinda hot. Lesson learned.
All my life, I've always been late to everything...I was even late to my birth and I'll probably be late to my own funeral...This one time in high school, I had a teacher who commented that I was always 5 minutes late to his class...I was 18 and an adult so there was nothing he could do about it...so he just said, "well then, 5 minutes late, for you, will be you being On-Time!". From then on I was 10 minutes late to class.
My wife is chronically late. I used to think she was a little inconsiderate but after a while i realized that she lacks the ability to correctly estimate how long something will take.
Several years ago, I had a friend who was unemployed and staying at his girlfriend's mom's house. He decided we should hang out. Cool, I'm down. One problem, I have like 3 hours of stuff to do before I can leave the house (shit I'd procrastinated on and had to hurry through if I'm going out that day). I get there and he's pissed, despite the fact I'd warned him. He then milks it for damn near a decade. If I'm late 20 seconds or 10 minutes, I get the same ration of shit. [1/?]
I made it my policy to be early for every event involving friends, even if it involves a serious intrusion on my personal life. These days I'm the earliest one or the only one who's on time. The lesson: schedulers and attendees have a responsibility for participating in an event. Someone just showing up to something can be late for good or bad reasons. Schedulers can fail to account for the lives of people they involve in events. Communication and managed expectations are key. [1/?]
I'm still friends with that guy, but my tolerance for him being petty has been permanently set to zero. Everyone else gets some proportional amount of leeway if they get on their bullshit for one reason or another. He gets called out the moment it's clear he's not letting something go. [3/3]
It's sorta the point. It's supposed to be off key and the way she's playing piano, she obviously knows how to play much better, but she's intentionally making it weird. That actually makes it more funny.
There are 2 types of people on the spectrum. Ones, like me, who have a constant countdown running to the time of every event, with separate countdowns to the time I need to get a shower, leave the house and arrive at waypoints on the journey to the destination. And, there are the other kind who do exactly the opposite, who have no concept of time or distance and when you tell them the event is an hours drive away somehow think that they don't need to even start getting ready until an hour before
Or, your both, like me! Time and I exist in different universes, so unfortunately, no matter the alarms I set and the planning I do to be on time, I will be late. And I will stress and get anxious about it, and do everything for it to not happen again, and then it still happens again 😞 though I’m usually not more than 10 mins late, but still. Time is a concept my brain just doesn’t grasp.
So long as you don't bitch when you show up late to whatever then it's all good. Show up when you want, peacefully. Though you are on your own with flights and trains. Good luck.
When I lived in Italy, I lived right across the hall from a German colleague. As such, we rode together on public transport for work. You can guess how that went.
She's easily one of my favorites; those extra-dry deliveries are excellent. All the hate going around for her reminds me of the people saying Norm MacDonald wasn't funny because they weren't willing to let a joke simmer.
Work meeting. 10am so everyone can make it. Guy who called the meeting isn't there. His manager calls and wakes him up. 20 minutes later he shows up with a giant gas station pop.
And it's not entirely about respecting other people's time, it's also about showing whether you can keep your word or not. If I tell you, "The thing starts at 3" and then you tell me, "Great, I'll be there!" and then you aren't....why should I ever take anything you say seriously? Why should I ever rely on you for anything if you're just gonna put in that minimal effort?
Okay, but they were technically there, they just weren't there at exactly 3. I'd say the contract here is the real problem, no one agreed to be there at 3, you assumed it. You need to specify the when not just the where. You need to specify, "the thing starts at 3, I expect you to be there early or exactly on time. If you come late I will be disappointed in you and never rely on you ever again for anything." Hope that help with future agreements, oaths, vows, covenants, bonds, and promises!
The jokes on you...for most people who are chronically late, they would prefer to not be there at all...so you're the only one missing out...the person who's late doesn't care.
Well WE don't have as much of a load-in (JK, I do). But what I don't understand is how you can have good rhythm AND bad punctuality - aren't both just knowing how long things take
Couldn't agree more. And don't whine when you're not invited to future plans either seen as this attitude leads me to think you weren't interested in being involved anyway
That's the think with chronically late people. They would rather not be part of plans...so if you think you're punishing them by not inviting them, the jokes on you...they don't care!
I don't think I would be punishing anyone, what kind of sociopath thinks about "punishing" their friends. No I respect both my own time and the time of whoever else we might be meeting. And I think its a damn shame that not only will you make it difficult to be friends with you by being late all the time you will actively aggravate the situation by not being so much as apologetic or, in the case of the example in this video, flaunt the level of disrespect you have for our arrangement
Also, to clarify, I have no problem with being late. Literally everyone is late sometimes. What I have a problem with is the attitude towards that lateness. If its properly acknowledging it like "so sorry I'm late dude, x y z happened" I'm like "that's cool, no worries, life happens" but when it's like shown in this video where its "40 mins late with an ice cream cone telling limp lies about the train" that goes beyond "life happens" and into "active disrespect/antagonism"
Nah. My mom and sister are like this. You just never schedule anything time sensitive. Get your seats at the theater and tell them what row you're in when they get there. Have someone else also make the core Thanksgiving dishes if they called one.
If they don't try to be on time, you don't try to wait for them before you start. Mutual disrespect
It's not mutual disrespect. As someone who's chronically late to things, I am fully aware that I'm the one that's late. I'm the one that fucked up. Start without me.
Then start stuff at 4 and ask them where they are. Keeps people on their toes. My ADHD often fo gets to accomodate travel time, so I some friends send me invites with slightly earlier times to accomodate, and I I show up on time, then I get to do the waiting
A person's home is the only exception I have for being early. All it does is stress out the host. The best place to be early is if there's a restaurant meet-up. One of my favorite things is seeing the eyes of my friends light up at the sight of an appetizer platter.
I do the tism time two step. Have to be there by 4, so leaving by 330, so ready by 315, so dressed by 300, so shower by 245, so coffee by 230, so wake by 200, so set alarm for 1230 and snooze for an hour and a half.
ADD is considered an outdated medical term. Do you actually have ADHD? Congrats if you're managing it well, some of us aren't and it has a negative effect on our lives. Like time blindness. Not my favorite symptom and "just be on time" is an ignorant thing to say. "Just don't be autistic." "Just stop having diabetes." "Just stop being depressed, go outside and you'll feel better." Same thing. ADHD is misnamed imo. It should be Executive Functioning Processing Disorder.
Thank you! While the ICD 10 code for ADD is still used someone is considered ADHD with a specifier of hyperactive, inattentive (previously ADD), or mixed type. It’s not a big issue, but I can’t help but to bring this up when someone says ADD.
You're not wrong, but I was recently diagnosed with ADHD Inattentive Type, which I understand is essentially identical to what used to the "old" ADD diagnosis. IMO, having to say, "I've got ADHD without the H" for accuracy's sake is pretty stupid - the whole thing definitely needs renamed.
is it? My daughter was diagnosed with it two years ago. Explicitly without the hyperactivity. I have it, too, and I'm hardly ever late. I've made getting ready in 5 minutes an art form. If I have an appointment at 10 in the morning, I won't get anything done before that, because I know I'd be late for it if I got lost in a side project.
BallsToYouMyGoodSir
that was dumb and i now dislike her cause thats what an asshole would do. what am i gonna do, get new friends
baadf00d
Once dated a girl who was 45 minutes late from our second date. I didn't complain, I waited for her to say sorry. She didn't say anything about it, later I confronted her about it and she kinda dismissed it. I missed that red flag. I should have called it quits, but she was kinda hot. Lesson learned.
nybrasse
As a NYC native who has had to manage laid-back LA transplants in a retail setting, this infuriates me to no end.
OrkenMork
All my life, I've always been late to everything...I was even late to my birth and I'll probably be late to my own funeral...This one time in high school, I had a teacher who commented that I was always 5 minutes late to his class...I was 18 and an adult so there was nothing he could do about it...so he just said, "well then, 5 minutes late, for you, will be you being On-Time!". From then on I was 10 minutes late to class.
rossonerinho
as she is chronically late, it would have been news if she had been on time.
khaoselement
I just stop inviting people like this. Then they're not my problem anymore.
qPRdxH4UXm36HS9rJgLA
40 minutes late with an ice cream cone.
sendMeToLordDevNull
reminded me if this:
zmanz
dribbling had me..
ProfaneSanction
It's a button a day
kaijuuGold
time blindness is horrible
PantlessThunderGoose42
My wife is chronically late. I used to think she was a little inconsiderate but after a while i realized that she lacks the ability to correctly estimate how long something will take.
ijustwannavote
I had a boss who literally lived 5 minutes down the street from our place of business and he was still late, EVERY DAY.
Geveg
Several years ago, I had a friend who was unemployed and staying at his girlfriend's mom's house. He decided we should hang out. Cool, I'm down. One problem, I have like 3 hours of stuff to do before I can leave the house (shit I'd procrastinated on and had to hurry through if I'm going out that day). I get there and he's pissed, despite the fact I'd warned him. He then milks it for damn near a decade. If I'm late 20 seconds or 10 minutes, I get the same ration of shit. [1/?]
Geveg
I made it my policy to be early for every event involving friends, even if it involves a serious intrusion on my personal life. These days I'm the earliest one or the only one who's on time. The lesson: schedulers and attendees have a responsibility for participating in an event. Someone just showing up to something can be late for good or bad reasons. Schedulers can fail to account for the lives of people they involve in events. Communication and managed expectations are key. [1/?]
Geveg
I'm still friends with that guy, but my tolerance for him being petty has been permanently set to zero. Everyone else gets some proportional amount of leeway if they get on their bullshit for one reason or another. He gets called out the moment it's clear he's not letting something go. [3/3]
HypnagogicHallucinations
https://media3.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1NGFnNWMyenhqMmhrZmhjNXpsMjd5YWtqZnM3N2h2cmMxNXhpNjd0dCZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/qjoYS3nThKgIWNDlOt/200w.webp
fartharder
Gonna miss her next season
MrSwissroll
These rhymes should be crimes
danstu
You'd think with all the writers at SNL, there'd be one that had heard a song before.
Ririq
It's just a joke, but i do think it's a lame not funny joke.
majortool
Sounds like you're chronically late.
themuffulettaisalsoaverygoodsandwich
why don't you relax, mate
davoodoochief
I think this could have been done a whole lot more skillfully. Geez. It just comes off as annoying, though I quite liked the idea.
youstupidpoop
You should be a writer on SNL then.
majortool
It's sorta the point. It's supposed to be off key and the way she's playing piano, she obviously knows how to play much better, but she's intentionally making it weird. That actually makes it more funny.
davoodoochief
I agree this was intentional. I liked the commentary too, but for me, it was not my fave sketch, that's for sure.
marthafarquar
There are 2 types of people on the spectrum. Ones, like me, who have a constant countdown running to the time of every event, with separate countdowns to the time I need to get a shower, leave the house and arrive at waypoints on the journey to the destination. And, there are the other kind who do exactly the opposite, who have no concept of time or distance and when you tell them the event is an hours drive away somehow think that they don't need to even start getting ready until an hour before
stillnodog
Or, your both, like me! Time and I exist in different universes, so unfortunately, no matter the alarms I set and the planning I do to be on time, I will be late. And I will stress and get anxious about it, and do everything for it to not happen again, and then it still happens again 😞 though I’m usually not more than 10 mins late, but still. Time is a concept my brain just doesn’t grasp.
facepalmingestpanda
https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1N2lrbThldzRwdG9zdjNhcGNicDNmZ3AwMHNveGlxdDZpcTRkdjdhbyZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/dB12mOQb99BwDlM83I/200w.webp
smokinghashalg
Yea.. yeeesh this is like the mumble rap of comedy..
areyouelonmusk
Yaaaay, entitled disrespect!
majortool
I think she's making fun of those people. Even though she's playing it off as if she were the late one.
miniatureBear
Ikr I’m not sure why everyone is so mad. True to snl form this song isn’t saying the late people are right
chaylar
So long as you don't bitch when you show up late to whatever then it's all good. Show up when you want, peacefully. Though you are on your own with flights and trains. Good luck.
Soggybathroomsock
I have the sneaking suspicion this song is about people in her immediate vicinity, more than her own way of doing things.
PootisBirb
rezpawner
It's not often that I hate absolutely everything about a song, so well done. The message, the singing, the melody, the rhymes. Chef's kiss.
SMarkt
i am a german. we explode when we are 30 seconds late. you never saw a german explode? right, we are never late.
pictory
Unless you're talking about the trains. *ahem*
walnutbreath
When I lived in Italy, I lived right across the hall from a German colleague. As such, we rode together on public transport for work. You can guess how that went.
samwyze
slidewhistlesymphony
She is the most hilarious addition to SNL in many years!
wiltsjunk
To each their own. I find her incredibly unfunny. Like I wonder how is she even on the cast?
VinnieJonesDiary
Oooof, sIck burn on SNL.
fakieflip180
Absolutely, Jane Wickline is horribly underutilized.
imeatingpizzaandfuckit
Yes!
Meowsma
She's easily one of my favorites; those extra-dry deliveries are excellent. All the hate going around for her reminds me of the people saying Norm MacDonald wasn't funny because they weren't willing to let a joke simmer.
facepalmingestpanda
I think Norm was one of the best to ever do it and I think this video is a crime against music.
NChomsky
I'll look you right in the eye and say the trains were slow. 😆💀
fartharder
Work meeting. 10am so everyone can make it. Guy who called the meeting isn't there. His manager calls and wakes him up. 20 minutes later he shows up with a giant gas station pop.
majortool
40 minutes late with an ice cream cone.
egoAristippos
I look straight in the eye, say the trains were slow.
JCentauri
40 minutes late with an ice cream cone.
Doctorfatherson
Its selfishness pretending to be assertive. Ive had friends that are always late and dont care, its just rude.
MassiveCollisionY
Exactly, respect other peoples time.
IGotTheMusicInMe425
And it's not entirely about respecting other people's time, it's also about showing whether you can keep your word or not. If I tell you, "The thing starts at 3" and then you tell me, "Great, I'll be there!" and then you aren't....why should I ever take anything you say seriously? Why should I ever rely on you for anything if you're just gonna put in that minimal effort?
DarthFutuza
Okay, but they were technically there, they just weren't there at exactly 3. I'd say the contract here is the real problem, no one agreed to be there at 3, you assumed it. You need to specify the when not just the where. You need to specify, "the thing starts at 3, I expect you to be there early or exactly on time. If you come late I will be disappointed in you and never rely on you ever again for anything." Hope that help with future agreements, oaths, vows, covenants, bonds, and promises!
usernamesarenotcomments
You're free to do that. It'll be the last time I'll ever schedule anything with you.
OrkenMork
The jokes on you...for most people who are chronically late, they would prefer to not be there at all...so you're the only one missing out...the person who's late doesn't care.
Hrafna55
Yep. Being consistently late is lazy and rude.
DarthFutuza
Nah, I just start lying to their face in retaliation. Instead of being told it starts at 7, I tell them it starts at 6.
powwerbottom
We just tell our drummer that practice starts 30 mins before it really does. That way he's only 10 minutes late with an ice cream cone
m4uboy
drummer's not on time? that's a problem. sounds like a lead singer.
powwerbottom
Well WE don't have as much of a load-in (JK, I do). But what I don't understand is how you can have good rhythm AND bad punctuality - aren't both just knowing how long things take
m4uboy
i think we can all agree the bassist is reliable af.
thedoorman42
This.
gaggedandgooped
tizme
Oh, we’ll be very happy with this. Hate appointments and events, Thank you.
Ririq
Sounds like society is not for you. Good luck being a hermit in the woods.
tizme
You are 100% correct!
Wait, you know where I live?!
TeddyBruhsvelt
Couldn't agree more. And don't whine when you're not invited to future plans either seen as this attitude leads me to think you weren't interested in being involved anyway
OrkenMork
That's the think with chronically late people. They would rather not be part of plans...so if you think you're punishing them by not inviting them, the jokes on you...they don't care!
ukalliq
Not true according to the whining I've heard.
OrkenMork
Well. I'm always late to everything and I don't care...as well as everyone else I know who is chronically late.
TeddyBruhsvelt
I don't think I would be punishing anyone, what kind of sociopath thinks about "punishing" their friends. No I respect both my own time and the time of whoever else we might be meeting. And I think its a damn shame that not only will you make it difficult to be friends with you by being late all the time you will actively aggravate the situation by not being so much as apologetic or, in the case of the example in this video, flaunt the level of disrespect you have for our arrangement
TeddyBruhsvelt
Also, to clarify, I have no problem with being late. Literally everyone is late sometimes. What I have a problem with is the attitude towards that lateness. If its properly acknowledging it like "so sorry I'm late dude, x y z happened" I'm like "that's cool, no worries, life happens" but when it's like shown in this video where its "40 mins late with an ice cream cone telling limp lies about the train" that goes beyond "life happens" and into "active disrespect/antagonism"
AndroidSoul
Nah. My mom and sister are like this. You just never schedule anything time sensitive. Get your seats at the theater and tell them what row you're in when they get there. Have someone else also make the core Thanksgiving dishes if they called one.
If they don't try to be on time, you don't try to wait for them before you start. Mutual disrespect
Einbrecher
It's not mutual disrespect. As someone who's chronically late to things, I am fully aware that I'm the one that's late. I'm the one that fucked up. Start without me.
JondorCallsForAid
Or do what my family does: of you want the party to start at 7, tell everyone it starts at 5. That way, even if they're "late", they're still on time.
hyperchondriac
Then the people who are on time are 2 hours early. This only works if everyone is habitually late.
kindpanda
My wife tried that with her family. It worked the first time but now they're like "she said 4 which means 6 so I'll show up at 8"
zsefvgb
Then start stuff at 4 and ask them where they are. Keeps people on their toes. My ADHD often fo gets to accomodate travel time, so I some friends send me invites with slightly earlier times to accomodate, and I I show up on time, then I get to do the waiting
Freak0zoid
And Imma kick you out at 8:15
IncoherentApplesauce
I don't understand how people are late for things...I always end up doing the whole get there 20 early thing
walnutbreath
Depending on the event, 20 minutes early can be way worse than 20 minutes late.
Atomic2
Yea if you come to my home 20 minutes early for an event, be prepared to help me panic-clean.
samwyze
A person's home is the only exception I have for being early. All it does is stress out the host. The best place to be early is if there's a restaurant meet-up. One of my favorite things is seeing the eyes of my friends light up at the sight of an appetizer platter.
[deleted]
[deleted]
textilelover
I know you are trying to be kind, but unless you're really close, don't do that. And frankly, if you're going to do that, get there 2 hours early.
youstupidpoop
Don't do that.
sixhoursinacarwithmymotherinlaw
I do the tism time two step. Have to be there by 4, so leaving by 330, so ready by 315, so dressed by 300, so shower by 245, so coffee by 230, so wake by 200, so set alarm for 1230 and snooze for an hour and a half.
RexFury
i feel this pain deep in my body
TacosAreDelicious
ADHD for some
RexRexroththe1st
majortool
I have ADD and I'm always early.
MrGhostbuster
This may come as a shock to you but not everyone, even those with ADHD, are exactly the same as you.
youstupidpoop
ADD is considered an outdated medical term. Do you actually have ADHD? Congrats if you're managing it well, some of us aren't and it has a negative effect on our lives. Like time blindness. Not my favorite symptom and "just be on time" is an ignorant thing to say. "Just don't be autistic." "Just stop having diabetes." "Just stop being depressed, go outside and you'll feel better." Same thing. ADHD is misnamed imo. It should be Executive Functioning Processing Disorder.
TallPaleHandsome
Thank you! While the ICD 10 code for ADD is still used someone is considered ADHD with a specifier of hyperactive, inattentive (previously ADD), or mixed type. It’s not a big issue, but I can’t help but to bring this up when someone says ADD.
Einbrecher
You're not wrong, but I was recently diagnosed with ADHD Inattentive Type, which I understand is essentially identical to what used to the "old" ADD diagnosis. IMO, having to say, "I've got ADHD without the H" for accuracy's sake is pretty stupid - the whole thing definitely needs renamed.
majortool
That's what I was diagnosed with when I was 6. I was not hyperactive, but I still had to and still do take ritalin every day.
Elvirana
is it? My daughter was diagnosed with it two years ago. Explicitly without the hyperactivity.
I have it, too, and I'm hardly ever late. I've made getting ready in 5 minutes an art form. If I have an appointment at 10 in the morning, I won't get anything done before that, because I know I'd be late for it if I got lost in a side project.
Einbrecher
My ignorant understanding is that, formally, they've moved it all under the umbrella of ADHD.