One Year - rimgo

GwensBackOnHerBS

9729

229

It's been about a year of hrt.

Overall it has been a life-saver, but I'm disappointed I didn't get more progress towards being femme. Time to start scheduling surgeries.

Based on the hrt progress... I'm not ever really going to pass and I'm pretty sad about it. Like my therapist seems concerned sad.

My face is softer, my ass is a little fatter, and I got some boobage, but overall I look pretty masc. If I do my makeup nice and put on a dress I pass from a distance I guess. I get mostly masc pronouns unless people don't see me directly. I think I'm definitely boyfailing but a long way from girl passing.

I need to work on weight-loss. With some med changes and other things I've been struggling with weight loss most of the year, but I've got it together on the last month or so, I just need to keep it up. The muscle loss makes it a lot harder.

I called for ffs, but it seems like the wait time on that is going to be 1.5 to 2 years with the doctor I wanted. I'm pretty frustrated about that. I hate my face. I look like my dad, that abusive fuck.

The boobs are coming in nice, but they're not as sensitive as I hoped. Why would that be? My nipples dont seem very womanly either.

My makeup game is pretty on-point. I've got some dresses, skirts, and stuff that I like and shoes that I really like. I've got this simple little pair of black Mary Jane's that I just adore. My hair is nice and long, and a mix of pink and blue. My hair is much cooler than I am.

The hrt mostly cured my bald spot and stopped the damage with the hair line. So I might be ok with that.

Lasers on the beard. Going to switch to electrolysis when the lasers stop working.

Most of the year I've felt much better than pre-transition, although lately I'm feeling frustrated. Like a lot better. Not being in the closet to myself, accepting myself, not being complicit in my own suppression has been more amazing than anything.

I worry a lot about the government. I don't know what to do there. I'd try and leave the country if it weren't for joint custody of kids with an ex-wife.

So... it's a slow start, but started.

bikergeek6249

happy transiversary!

1 week ago |

TheFastpaws

It takes time and things can be adjusted. Speak to your doctor about your concerns.

loxiabun

🎉🏳️‍⚧️💜

ThatOtherGirlYouKnow

Happy traniversary dear Gwen. You are beautiful - and yes, HRT is slow. For the breast sensitivity I'd suggest looking at progesterone levels and perhaps upping that.

I've been using "transiversary" but "traniversary" does have a certain ring to it.

TinaEveFox

I've been transitioning for 5 years, had some issues with getting the estrogen and blockers working for the first bit and I still think I look masc. Honestly I think I'll always feel that way but other people tell me I don't. It's hard to see yourself any other way, progress is slow but it happens you just have to let it. Just stay on your bs and you got this.

Crispy4Skin

kraeftig

Regarding weight loss, a bit of muscle work helps. I've lost 100 lbs - twice - and focusing on usable strength it was fast both times.

I'm not saying aim to look muscular. Just to having strength to move things with a lot of endurance. I don't look muscular at all.

ArenJ6

Congrats on the anniversary! Remember to give yourself a little treat, whether it's sweat, salad or a little crime. You're just getting started and passing is cool, but the most important thing is to be you and enjoy yourself. The rest is temporary. Here's to many more 💜

AlmostClever

Congrats on one year, thereabouts! It's a marathon not a sprint.

DaymanAhAAAAah

Happy anniversary sis! After about four years on HRT things of somewhat stalled for me, though others can see it much more apparent than I. I’ve a tendency to focus on fashion than makeup. I know it sucks hon but you’ve wanted/needed this for so long, enjoy the journey and it’ll come piecemeal.

You look a hell of a lot better than I do

draconicus

omggg

Iplaybadguys

I’m in approximately the same stage as you, @op though it’d have been 2 years now, if u hadn’t tried to stay in the closet to myself, panicked, stopped for ~6mo, and started back up. I am getting more nip growth of recent though, and im working up the courage to do makeup/clothes and electrolysis (if anyone was to get the hypertrichosis from laser, it’d be me, I attract misfortune, lol). Leaving Texas next year is a major step for my mental health too, lol

*if “I” hadn’t tried… - goddamn autocorrect is actively getting worse by the minute

FancypantsMcGill

had to re-read that a few times. Screwed with my head. 😆

stabbermcshooty

I can’t pretend to understand what you’re feeling with your progress but I’ll be here cheering you on. You can and will be who you really are

Thanks!

akelamishari

Congrats on the transition and hrt! Im sorry you’re not seeing as much progress as you’d like. Is your therapist worried it might be depression? (Or did you mean hrt therapist?) i am AFAB and my own puberty took about 4-5 years with natural hormones, so dont look too hard into “not enough” changes yet. You start to lose testosterone characteristics over time, and more estrogen changes will continue. Fat redistribution takes a while, you will get finer body hair too, slowly. If i may share a bit:

Ive been on T 3 or 4 times now, three from self medicating to start passing as male, the last i went to the dr properly. That time i was on it the longest, about 2yrs. Stopped when covid hit (males had higher risks). I had a nice thicker hair trail from my bellybutton down. In these 6 years, its pretty much disappeared, even though supposedly body hair does not “regress”. It does, very slowly and very subtly. Your nipples will change, slowly. Think of it as washing the T off first, before full E

🏳️‍⚧️💜

BeachsideBarghest

Be patient and kind with yourself @OP You're beautiful for being true to who you are <3

cuttlefishsticks

As much as all us adult transitioners wish that hrt would just recognize our age and skip to the end of puberty, unfortunately, that isn't how it works. Don't let a slow first year get ya down. You're effectively about where a 12 or 13 year old would be at this point, so give it time.

I just need a couple wins on the transition front...

lizardfox64

nice I am coming up to my 2 year point

Nice. How's it going?

pretty good I have tiny boobs now. I need to get rid of my beard but I think it is going smoothly

6 days ago |

Nice.

I'm doing lasers on my beard for now and electrolysis to clean up what the lasers don't get later.

I am jumping straight to electrolysis but I am trying to get insurance to pay for it upfront. that may be too complicated so I may need to get them to reimburse me

Aranon1183

What I wouldn't give to start my HRT... Although, at 35 it might be too late for me.

I was older than that when I started

How brutal is Puberty Part Deux?

My main frustrations are that I look pretty masculine still, and my orgasms suck.

Well, I used to have to jerk off three times a day all the way up until my early-30s, but now it's drastically less and my orgasms also suck.

I mean, the 3 times a day jerking it horniness is also no fun. I just want like a couple good orgasms a week.

Pilgrymm

I'm with you. I haven't even been able to start hrt, mostly because my wife says that if I do it's over. I don't want to do that to our kid, and also I'd probably end up on the streets so it's a lose-lose-lose situation for me to start hrt.
And I have the body of my mother and face of my dad and I hate seeing myself in the mirror every time I catch a glimpse. He was a horrid religious nut that left his children to be abused by a psychopath.
So I feel ya. Wishing only the best for your journey 💜

It do be like that sometimes.

I hope you find what you need.

Maybe she's not into girls. And you clearly are one. So it doesn't seem like a good match in the end I guess. If you manage to stay off the streets, and get your own place, I think your kid will be happier with a happy parent than a depressed parent.

Yeah that's what she said, she isn't into women. It's fine I understand.

It sucks for you of course. I bet you still love her. I'm sorry this is a tough time for you.
But try to weigh the positives and negatives of staying together vs you being yourself the rest of your life.

Its a horrible thing for her to say to you, but consider just postponing it. Staying with a wife that says tgat just for the sake of your child, will make you hurt inside and may affect them still. In the end its better to start planning for a future situation, maybe when your kid is grown.

I've thought about it. Unfortunately I'm physically disabled and the only income we have is through the state. If I separated from her I'd have no money, no car, and no housing. I might be able to sign myself back up for some ebt and medical but that's not going to help much in the end. My parents are dying on the other side of the states in my brother's house who I am no contact with. So I'm trapped and my only choice is to set my needs aside for the foreseeable future.

I am sorry to hear that. I hope things can change favorably for you and wish you the best.

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