UnclePetey1987
133984
2824
100
Jan 24, 2022 12:37 PM
UnclePetey1987
133984
2824
100
tjm1226
Wash my hand
c2zvgsVillain
Wash my hands
Nekocatz13
twerksforfish
put my toy back on the bedside table and cry into the void
OlderWiser
ProlificFizz
pr3viso
Wipe the D with the curtains
TheClockworkBird
Cuddle, clean, pee, shower, smoke, cuddle
bonerforce
Tell her that I am sorry and hand her the horse-sized dildo
WeDidntBurnHim
Continue the catholic sermon
Shaodyn
Goblor
Wash my hands
artboyor
SerenePrincess013
Wait to get untied.
SociallyDistancedSpirituallyConnected
Continue the argument
fiddlewheelx
Feel strangely empty as I contemplate the meaninglessness of life and how even carnal desires will not let me escape this nightmare.
X1Liv3
That takes me back.. Good luck dude, if it gets bad remember you'll feel better after some sleep.
Katateochi
dude, have a hug.
yamatto
Wake up.
thegrimtrigger
Ask if there's any gogurt left in the fridge
StewedTomaters
There probably is, but my refractory period is at least a few minutes.
DoctorSniffles
"thanks grandma, happy birthday."
nugenki
artistsrendering
ISeeAlmostEverything
Cuddle
SmokyDoggg
Sleep
PaleAsFuck
Even if it's a morning fuck?
SmokyDoggg
ESPECIALLY if it's a morning fuck
byebuddyhopeyoufindyourdad
CirB
Only with Rosie Palm and her five sisters
MstrES
She still has five sisters?
cenfou2tout
Sex is sex...
bruudwin
to the curious its from a nice manga titled Midori Days and this image is not taken outta context XD
NegimaSensei
It's even weirder when you know the context.
Efreeti
I don't get what's happening. Is he in love with dead blossoms?
bruudwin
premise of the manga is a girl one day wakes up apart of his hand, as one of his fingers. they live like that for a lil while XD
WoodfolkFae
in love with his hand
BythepowerofchristIamtheLaderlappen
Pretend I didn't just cum after three pumps.
Rhynn
Cumming doesn't have to be the end of the sexual encounter...
WoodfolkFae
do you expect a guy who cums after three pumps to be able to continue long after?
Rhynn
I mean... there is another party who would like to have some fun too, sex is more than penetrating/pumping
keybladers
Other things you can do besides pumping
calmdowntoughguy
Get a towel
StrangerNum1
I have so many sex towels and never enough with my new " Friend" is just great. Keep hydrated lads
ChristopherTallant
I help clean up and then cuddle.
fbutt09
Yeah, me too. But I don’t clean up.
bradunk1
And nap
JustSomePersonThere
Most correct answer!
Lucky246
Yeah the blood can stain clothes so its important to do it fast
ChadimusPrime69
What do you use to clean the pepper spray out of your eyes?
wookietiddy
If this isn't what people do, I feel like they're doing it wrong. Or maybe for the wrong reasons or with the wrong people.
theeiinfamousiizzy
Or maybe they’re not the cuddling type?
ruferto
i usually pee first
scuba7jb
Pay. The same way I handle a remodeling project... "Half up front and half upon completion."
thatwoodguy
You should withhold 10% u til you are satisfied with the results.
probablyobvious
Just seems like a waste having 2 transactions a couple minutes apart
Thundermoe
You last over a minute? Tell me your secrets about this witchcraft?
probablyobvious
Stop yourself mid pee. It strengthens the muscles and helps you last longer (not actually joking)
bindedig
I just send Venmo and but “school tutoring” in the memo
PathologicalLier
Huh.. they always wanted full upfront from me. Maybe because i was so drunk they knew i wouldn't complete.
UnagiFerrin
How is no one commenting about the disturbingly funny comment in the post
trigonman3
If we all commented on things we've already seen, there would be no comments on imgur.
catscatscatscat
It’s not very funny. More like a gross-out dad joke. But, the comments are much better.
VodkaReindeer
This is web 2.0. You make the content.
StrangePaegan
There was no red circle.
[deleted]
[deleted]
ADKCourage
Also also wik
fallen1092
I never knew that, thanks for the lesson!
UnagiFerrin
Damn you're right. That definitely kills the joke. Learned the appropriate term too! Thanks!
WoodfolkFae
but that would ruin the twist
forreference
Yeah but using the correct terms goes away the twist.
FallingStar7669
Because most of us saw this exact same thing a few days ago.
wadatahmydamie
And because it’s just a reworked punchline from an old joke
SoMuchPooPooSon
A few days ago? Even grandmas on Facebook are calling this a repost.
GeographyIsWhereItsAt
Autopsies are for humans, necropsies are for animals...
ReverseTrapTsukasa
Right, then the "vet" must have served in the armed services. For them, being a vet is a higher point of pride than being a mortician.
ReverseTrapTsukasa
I'm guessing the DVs are coming from former members of the armed services that don't want the comparison to the vet in the post....
RFDFFA
Damn! You beat me to it!
WoodfolkFae
but saying that would ruin the twist
vindik8or
And a good vet would know that.
ReverseTrapTsukasa
Vet or Veterinarian? A vet could be a former member of the armed services now working as a mortician.
GaelicandUnpronounceable
In the UK at least, no one ever says “veterinarian”, we always say “vet”. No one would think “veteran”.
vindik8or
Same in Australia.
SergeiBoobtitsky
Which is why this one doesn't.
swagb98623
Unless they are working on bigfoot.
Siptro
Pee
KlyntTalks
This is the correct answer
SocoFox
Always.
nicilaskin
yup ...
merrilup
Wake her up
Snooj
While sitting.
ruferto
well i'm a dude, so i usually stand - but do whatever makes you happy
Snooj
I'm a dude too but aiming on after-sex pee is unpredictable.
ruferto
oh, for that issue: wipe the tip w/ a wet-wipe first. i prefer wiping the whole shaft & tip w/ hand of soapy water if no wet-wipe available
Snooj
Or circumventing both of those things and sitting. Frist pee clears it all out.
JCPKasa
You should pee before. Same cleansing effect without thinking of going to toilet during sex.
KellyCrazyCatLadyinTraining
How to say “I’m an uneducated male” without saying “I’m an uneducated male.”
PlaidBastard
"I flush the toilet *before* I take a dump, so I'm not worried about clogging the drain with my flush."
JCPKasa
Clean the pipes for your darling. Or do you both go to pee after sex?
JCPKasa
Okey, new generation new rules. I read that this is no longer teached this way. Good to know.
evangrumling5
Smart! In the movies everyone just falls asleep until morning.
Veraatje01
I always find that interesting. I'm hardly opposed to cum, but sleeping in it and getting it all over your sheets? Bit strange.
SilverFoxChaser
This is solid advice. Lowers the chance of UTIs.
umgonnathinkofsomethingreallyclever
Good for both men and women
Siptro
That’s how it started but now it’s like a thing. Like I HAVE to pee after. Even if it’s not real
Einherion
Worst is when you need to pee after but can't cause you peed before
XicoLarico
True story. Pro Tip: keep a spare pee for these moments. No need to thank me.
hairytrigga
If what isn't real?
Vesane
A lower risk of UTI from post-coital voiding, since evidence is weak. However it's harmless and *may* help, so why not
fbutt09
Forgive my ignorance but is that not only if you have casual unprotected sex with unknown partners?
SilverFoxChaser
Not really. It's from 'pushing' bacteria from the outside to the inside. Bathing habits and contraception don't matter(much).
fbutt09
Ah, ok. Thanks. Be safe chasing that Silver Fox.
ItSeemsYouHaveSufferedaTerribleFate
IDK why but I struggle to pee after. Need to deescalate for a little bit.
FilYouWithMe
I just hop in the shower and stand in the water all awkwardly until it happens.
TimbitsAreDonutHoles
Me too, I usually need like 5 minutes and then my body is like "alright we can pee again. Go ahead"
MadamPuddifoot
Ahhh yes, the awkward "cum drip hold your hole skitter to the shitter" walk. Lol
SunTzar
Pure poetry! I love it
MemeusCalgar
MadamPuddifoot
You cup your hand under your vaginal opening so cum doesn't dribble down your legs, or onto the floor. And you have to walk awkwardly
MemeusCalgar
Beezlebubble
As a guy, we have something slightly similar as a little bit keeps trying to drip out for a time. Constantly wiping it after or just needing
doppelfisch
Keep a hand towel beside the bed! After use just replace it with a fresh one. It becomes habit pretty quickly.
Beezlebubble
To go is the best option
powwerbottom
Weird question: is this something that's only important if you have a vagina? Or does it prevent UTIs in penes too?
PlaidBastard
It's a good idea for us for the same reason, but our susceptibility to that UTI vector is a lot less in general, as far as I know.
PlaidBastard
Also, we blast out of our urethra, which probably offers some of the same natural prophylactic protection as peeing uniquely does for ladies
natecleveland
Everyone. But just don’t get carried away with thinking it’s as effective as a condom. Plenty folks with the clap even after doing this.
Feralkyn
UTI not STD
imaginaryPeppers
Women usually have shorter pee pipe (forgot the name) and are more prone to have bacteria to up there causing the infections.
SpaceWarrior3000
+1 solely for "pee pipe".
SapphireSun
Urethra
MadamPuddifoot
Lol pee pipe is my new name for it ?
Feralkyn
Lowkey wanna edit a urogenital diagram to say "pee pipe" but then it'd have to be on my imgur forever so
Rhynn
Not weird at all! Most important for vagina-havers, but definitely also important for the penis-bearers!
StewedTomaters
Wielders*
SpaceWarrior3000
Can you explain a bit more? I never heard about this, from any doctor, etc. Only read about it on imgur some yrs ago. Is that rly a thing? >
SpaceWarrior3000
> I am a woman, can't say I follow this advice on purpose, only had UTIs twice in my life.
Rhynn
As short as I can make it: pee-hole gets in contact with foreign bacteria during sex, bacteria travel up the urinary tract, cause infection.
Rhynn
Do note that I'm not a medical professional though.. but honestly, it's good for everyone involved to just go pee after sex :) can't hurt ;)
5GFPLaqZ4nAy2QwrqOEI
should it be immediately right after? or a few minutes / hours is ok?
Funnyjunker
As no one seems to mention it here... This only applies to women.
FabulouslyTiti
If you want to minimise the chance of a UTI, immediately after is the best choice if able.
titaniumsnail
Yup. I do it as quickly as I can after sex. No time for snuggling. Can snuggle after.
Shelest
Never stop peeing. Never.
DoctorDerpper
...and now the sequel to the movie that started it all. Never don't stop not peeing too.
PaleAsFuck
It's ok with a little while after but I would say 30min- 1h after
Zxaskad
Hour max and even then that's pushing it, best of luck
PandaBaroness
Should be right after. Or a few minutes. Hours is too long.
ImGoingToEatAllYourApples
Within 3 seconds of withdrawal
messica2
Ah yes the golden shower
Feralkyn
SIR
TheBisexualestBoyInTheVillage
Preferably at the same time
wooliebooger
R.Kelly method