Programming dump

Sep 16, 2017 1:34 AM

NotSoAngryGuy

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149099

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3181

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99

This one hurt me

Edit: Finally hit front page. That's it. I can finally go home.

Send music recommendations if you want.

I'm good enough at programming to know Im basically a glorified macro for turning stackoverflow questions answers into commit code :(

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Thanks for that #17

9 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 0

To be fair #2 applies to my research notes as well.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Tried to learn bash scripting while bored at work. Couldn't understand what I was doing wrong. When I replaced parts with copy pasted 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

code it worked. Turns out the computer had default settings for replacing "" with characters that weren't interpreted correctly.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Holy shit. I had forgotten all about Fox Trot. Such an awesome comic.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

I think it still updates online and its still pretty good

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

@op. Die antwoord, peelander z, flogging Molly. Somethings bound to catch.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Lustmord, Mr. Bungle, Rockdrigo Gonzalez, Clorofila, Dir en grey, Dead horse beats, La femme...

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#2. So much #2.

9 years ago | Likes 28 Dislikes 1

Same pretty much goes for finding one of my senior thesis papers. I have no idea what it says. It's like any thought had to have 10 subsets.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I always enjoy these. ☕️

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Programmer here. The "forgotten semicolon" issue is overblown. It becomes second nature to place it and you rarely ever forget it.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

My main thing is that I forget my brackets.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#7 made me actually laugh out loud. That is so true.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

He never resets word to 1 on a new page.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

#4 smells like Sony?

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

The semi colon one is all to accurate

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

I came back to a game code after 3 months and re-read it. I had made two functions that did the same thing with wildly different codes. Why?

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

What do you call a collection of programmer: An Argument.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Ahhh yes, first time programmer meme dump. Wait until you get to the point when you audibly groan at these

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

^ always mocking me SQL... always mocking...

9 years ago | Likes 46 Dislikes 0

Robert'); DROP TABLE Students;--

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

Oh Bobby Tables...

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

A sql statement walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks , "can I join you?"

9 years ago | Likes 37 Dislikes 0

this is why we need favorites for comments; //semicolon was on purpose

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

It's -- tho

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

How

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Comments in SQL are prefixed by -- not //

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

As a programmer I love these. My favorite is when I'm trying to figure something out and my boss answers too quickly for me to write down

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Mom "bananas are 50c per pound. Get five" i bought five pounds of bananas. Mother "why did u buy so many bananas?" [This happened]

9 years ago | Likes 82 Dislikes 0

5lbs of bananas is pretty standard when purchasing bananas.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

ArbitraryInstructionException;

9 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 0

I'm at a hackathon right now. So goddamn real.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

#5 hurt my soul... #12 when talking to management it's easier to just give a vague answer. 9/10 they don't care about/understand the details

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Can someone please explain #5

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Rather than getting tomorrow's date the method waits 24hrs and gets today's date.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

And like that it just became: funny *= 1000; // Funny initialized to 1 of course.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The 1000 is in milliseconds

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Funny. Except 'compiling' hasn't been an excuse we could use for at least 15 years.

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 1

Running tests can work as well

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I work radiation safety. We use "Smears are counting". If they are, it's legit, we can't do jack shit until the data's in really..

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

45 sec/smear on the Tennelec, 60 sec/smear on the Protean, godonlyknows/wet smear on the Wallac...

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Some people have gigabytes of sourcecode to build. Totally legit excuse, especially since the build often isn't as optimized as it could be

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

project i work on takes 3-7 min to build, another ~3 to deploy

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

These days it's waiting for Docker Compose to start all the services

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I know, I just really enjoy it.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Ever cross compile a custom Linux kernel?! It's a 15 minute break... then you find out you forgot a semi colon.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

We use "building" nowadays.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

clearly you haven't developed for Android yet

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Large projects can still take a fair amount of time to compile.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Try compiling Chrome.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

i used that excuse while working at mcdonalds

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

what? i remember compiling. what am i missing from this comment

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

computers are fast now. it kinda sucks.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

oh. lol. i remember compiling. i hated the down time of like 5 minutes. not enough time to do anything

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

as computers have gotten faster coding have gotten more data heavy though. A 1 or 2 meg exe on a 486 was the exception. Now wordpad is 4 mb.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

that 486 was cruising somewhere around 66Mhz. the $200 referbs that i just ordered are 3.4Ghz. 51x faster helps a little with larger files.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

forgot that they were dual core too... but wanted to highlight that a programming company shouldn't be using 5yo referbs. so x50 is conserv.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

This post just made me want to start learning how to code, can someone tell me where to start?

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

if python is tempting, go for Ruby/Rails instead; the community & documentation is so much nicer to interact with, + it's a beautiful lang

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 2

software-carpentry.org is pretty good for learning about bash, python, R, SQL, version control with git, and other topics. (1/2)

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

(2/2) it's not too extensive yet, but it was recommended to me by a mentor and I learned python through it. Currently working on SQL.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

This is the best online programming course I've seen in my travels: https://www.edx.org/course/introduction-computer-science-harvardx-cs50x

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Take a learn Python course (it's easy to learn, understand, and broadly useful irl). Then go do short tutorials, eg rabbitmq's for python.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 2

The tutorials are easy to follow, and feel very much like real code (cause they are- we use rabbitmq broadly at my work)

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Thanks all, when I make my first million I'll dedicate it to you all, but you can't have my money, that monies for the hookers

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"Open new file" ... but seriously, Find some online tutorials for any object oriented language and follow those

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

first you need to be released from the Matrix

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#17 Why would you put this evil in the world?

9 years ago | Likes 211 Dislikes 0

Because lulz, obviously.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Ah most decent compilers would find that in a heartbeat, some will even highlight it. Even notepad++ would figure that out!

9 years ago | Likes 36 Dislikes 1

Reminds me of using nulls in place of spaces to mess with people.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I insert nbsp with altgr-space. Some years ago you had very strange messages with GCC and non ascii characters. Nightmare to debug

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

A greek question mark?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#17 thanks for sharing that... It will be wisely used

9 years ago | Likes 39 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Only do it if you know the person you're doing it to isn't a violent psychopath.

9 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 0

They will be after

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Only do it if you're okay with the person *becoming* a violent psychopath.

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

Dude, Java interprets unicode escapes as a separate step before compilation. Insert comment. Insert unicode newline escape code...

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Oh, it gets better: https://github.com/reinderien/mimic

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure that's pretty easy to find now days.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

nowadays*?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I guess you're correct. I always assumed people over emphasized it into that word based on it usually following a joke. TIL. Thanks.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Maybe. It has been a few years since I cared about a semicolon. But 1997 me is livid.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

As the 1997 you should be!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I feel fairly certain that Visual Studio would find that immediately and give you an error with the exact position.

9 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

In VS it gives you the " ; expected" and "unexpected character ;" errors and highlights what looks exactly like a semi-colon. Certified evil

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Except I would backspace and replace it within 2m or wondering why it is having issues. I may just rewrite the whole line.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

True, so to go full evil you could do a find and replace, then save, close and reopen the file so there isn't any undo.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Who isn't using version control these days??!? ;) if just revert to a previous commit.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

And then you give up on Visual Studio for pointing out perfectly good semicolons. (Unless VS actually tells what the mark really is)

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Nah, it'll probably highlight the entire line and give you a cryptic ungoogle able error code.

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Google might take you right to this page.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Should give you "Expecting ;", probably.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

"Visual Studio: Sass detected on line 17!"

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

++Points

9 years ago | Likes 228 Dislikes 4

that bothered me so much when i tried coding PHP

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It's from C, so you'll see it in a lot of languages, including Java.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

i'm used to using value++ , i just googled it and i feel like i should have known it lol

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

increment(&points);

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

i hate everything about it

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

FUCK I FORGOT THE SEMICOLON

9 years ago | Likes 32 Dislikes 0

Int points = 5; points++; No use in givong points if you don’t cast them first!

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Would be fine in non-strict languages. My problem is he's incrementing without assigning, so it's useless

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The "++"-version includes the assigning

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

When it's after the variable, sure, but not when it's in front of it

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Depends on the language, but in most C-like languages, you're wrong.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That's not what casting is.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Points++ // I like to look at a post before I upvote

9 years ago | Likes 144 Dislikes 1

++Points will be more fast than Points++

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 6

*gets a pitchfork and torch while mumbling something about premature optimization*

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Points += 1; // I like to be thorough/redundant

9 years ago | Likes 50 Dislikes 2

Points = new Array(Points, 1).reduce(function(a, b) { return a + b; });

9 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 1

Oh dear God

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Points=Points+1;

9 years ago | Likes 32 Dislikes 1

9 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 1

Points = ++Points; // because let's needlessly confuse some junior programmers

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I also found my first bug: factor == 1

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0