psstuphere
1616
75
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A guy asked me if he could get in front of me, I said "sorry, I'm also in a hurry". I have never turned somebody down before. But then the guy in front of me said it was ok for that guy to get in front of him. I was washed over by anger, but I took my things and started to head over for another queue. Just saying "for fuck sake". But he started saying things and I lost it. Yelled back and forth. He walked towards me, and I don't back down, so I took as many steps as him. Talking loudly.
Then the teller said something, and I realized this was rediculous. I appologized and told the truth, that I just got mad because I was in a hurry and somebody else decided a third part could skip in front of me. Said sorry to the innocent third part and let him in before me. Said sorry to the guy I had fought with, he would not have it. He looked at me with this death stare when he was heading out.
Of course this guy can't decide who will cut in line, of course he was confrontational and started to pick a fight when I got upset and about to leave. But why the hell did I get so upset, and why did I not ignore him and just head to another line? Am I getting that old man anger? Was it because I usually just swallow things like that and I finally had it?
Guess I will have to find another store and try to be a better man. Of course all sides in a fight look bad and disgrace themselves, there are no winners. But it's somewhat worse when you are the older part.
I am ashamed. I have become a little more agitated but small things lately, and it worries me. I will work on this. My grandfather was the kindest person I ever met, I want to o continue to be like him.
EricAirheart
Just cut infront of them all. If ques dont matter to the dude then fuck them all
InablueMule
heard about the new Steven pinker book?
joshcrimson
Next time just follow them home, take a photo of them in their driveway, and then leave a printout of it in their mailbox like the rest of us.
cuttysark
I suspect that everyone has a time or two in their lives where this happens. It's happened to me twice, both of them decades ago. I'm also an old man. I hate admitting this because I don't feel THAT old.
drduffer
Sometimes what we become angry about isn’t what we’re really angry about. If you’re in the US, there’s a lot going on that leaves me absolutely enraged with no convenient outlet to let it go.
Talk to someone about what’s going on in your life and you might find out some things that you can control and deal effectively with that will help you be your best self.
toolzgalore2
Dude, you are good. Everyone is going through something and that just pushed you over the line. I am glad you were able to reflect in the moment and pull it back. Good on you!
TheYodajen
Just move on with life. It happened. It's over and nothing
picselator
Was it because I usually just swallow things like that and I finally had it? — It too often is, and you know it. I'm recovering myself and know you'll find your way, too. Good luck, stranger!
TomahawkJackson
"Of course this guy can't decide who will cut in line"
Yes, he can. Anything not prohibited by law is allowed.
"I am ashamed." - This whole thing is only a problem if you're NOT ashamed. But you are - "if you can't look back at something you did as 'cringe', it means you haven't grown as a person"
I think we both agree that this was a one-off thing in your life, and I'm really proud of you for being able to share it like this. it's therapeutic. <3
defaultname2000
you should have gone in front of that other guy and flipped them both off
SpicyGoober
Not understanding why you felt the need to apologize unless I read it wrong. Dude basically gave a big 'fuck you' asking the guy in front of you after you said no, and guy in front let someone cut multiple people further back saying yes. Both are in the wrong and is now viewed as entirely your fault after for apologizing.
charondaboatman
Tolerance and compassion work best when they’re ultimately returned. When they’re not, things tend to devolve, rapidly. Consider this a learning experience, and don’t be ashamed.
sindail
https://media0.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1ZjAxazFtbXBuN2t4czNwY2VwNXBnMDJlaTNqdjRieXl6N3dyb3I4OCZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/JwjBy94VzDd6/200w.webp A lot of people can't handle self reflection much less realize they were wrong and make a sincere effort to better themselves and try not to make the same mistakes again. If only everyone on the planet could manage this the world we live in would be a better place.
Californiajackson
I'm not so sure he was in the wrong.
urusername2
I'm 80. As you get older, you start looking for all the fairness you've thought was missing. Unfortunately, that fixes nothing. You did right.
twoamartist
You commented that little things are setting you off, and it worries you. Listen to yourself. There’s something more going on. Talk to someone, even it’s a family member or friend first. Don’t go it alone. Hang in there friend, life is increasingly harder right now, and you might find that other people are experiencing this too. Hugs.
TexMexHex
And since you backed down, he will do it again out of spite.
psstuphere
Yeah, I have that feeling. Maybe I was the bigger person in the end, but he will feel he won.
UncleIrohny
I actually think you acted exactly as the situation called for. But don't let it bother you afterwards.
Also:
"Front pockets" can only be offered if
A. you're the 2nd to last in line
B. Everyone in the queue readily agrees
Be proud of having the mental capacity to de-escalate the situation and also making a mental note of not letting assholes upset you.
Captain Hindsight would have said to the guy in front of you: "Thanks buddy. You're great" and then moved in front of him as well
ILoveThiPlatform
I'm impressed you caught yourself doing something you didn't want to, made the decision to stop, AND tried to make amends. That's hard and most people don't have that level of self awareness in the moment.
Don't beat yourself up. You made a mistake and tried to fix it. That's growth.
FluidExchangeProgram
I’ve never asked to cut in line cause I’m in a hurry, but I have had bunches of people offer if I’m standing there with only 1-2 items.
psstuphere
Its rare, so I always say it is ok if asked. And often offer people to go in front as well.
michBeast
Exactly this is it! If you are last in line and have a lot of stuff, you can let a person go in front of you... You dont ask to cut and also if you have someone behind you already you are not in the position to let someone in front of you. if you do, you are an absolute asshole and deserve to be screamed at.
oldguyexlurker
I'd've asked the guy in front if he'd mind me going first then, since my urgency was of no less importance than the guy behind me. Frankly, the guy in FRONT was out of line.
Gadamnit69
Should of just went all the way in already took it to that point should of hit the guy why not? Fuck it
Zetor
https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1eDN0dGI4amQ2d2RsdDVzeDB1NHc1dTh1dXdkZHcwNmJibXE3N2k3YiZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/10Jpr9KSaXLchW/200w.webp
cheeriossuckbecause7
It happens. We all lose our cool at some poinr, and blow up when that one last thing tips us over the edge. Don't beat yourself over it - you caught yourseld in the momenr, and tried to make amends. Too many of us don't even manage that much. Good on ya.
RedWingedBlackbirds
Agree! And give yourself a do over and try to do better next time. We're all human and we're all learning and growing ✨
psstuphere
I am a little sad that a couple of employees had to live through the situation. I hope they felt my apology was real. Hopefully they remember all my years of being polite. Someone at work once said about a situation "we all will have moments were we act badly, because that's life, the important thing is to apologize for acting bad and learn from it, even if someone else was acting bad too".
cheeriossuckbecause7
Totally. We're human, and we make mistakes. And we try to make amends, if we're good people. Sounds like you are.
PineappleLoopsBroether
7 days ago I told a guy to walk away from me, and then told my manager that it was crucial that I be let go for the day. I wanted to have a knife fight in the elevator with the stop button pushed with some other technician who mouthed off to me. I craved it.