BELGIANfries
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Mother tells daughter to never be a lesbian
Out of food?
part 2: http://imgur.com/gallery/bQOFP
PamelaSplooshPoovey
All my future cats are just little kitty embryos right now...
zgraphikerin
*right meow...
1Rogue
That baby tho
ItsPrettyDamnBig
+1 for eve being bootylicious
blueowl642
Hurricane? More like a hurrican't handle my swag. Amirite.
sidvicious54
I thought hurricane season was over!
TheManYourManCouldSmellLike
No, stop dude, literally, like seriously, fuck.
getoverit
You're so right that it hurts a little.
inspiringandfunnyusernamecoolheh
It will destroy nothin in this house, you hearin me: "tore nay, doh." *immediatelygetsslappedwithsoapsinsocketsbyrandompeople
swarleystinson
"You need to evacuate. Or don't. I'm a cop, not a...oh wait."
quickthinkofawittyusernamebeforesomeonetakesit
yes friend, you are correct.
nineT2
hurricaine and Abel
ToxicPineapple
In 25 years when our generation is running the national hurricane center, we will see a "hurricane #yolo"
Powerdork
Is that pre-alphabetical (and thus a hurricane that crosses the year line)?
MarcOfALion
Superman dat hoe
theghostofcraigtnelson
"Dad we really have to leave!" "Hold on, let me take this selfie first."
Ruzzcube
But first,
DevonGronka
Dads be illin
LotusJackhammers
am I the only one annoyed with tumblr's iconic typing habits? Not everything has to be in caps lock...or a run on sentence
DetDueitt992
I guess seeing every girl I've ever cared about taken from me in some way or another has made me bitter and cynical.
Shamorza
HOLY FUCK! They give you food in exchange for money?
wittykitty14
Now what can I exchange for money to buy said food?
EdaBellhouse19
Your whole building smells of potatoes!
Ximema
We need more tumblr posts
BELGIANfries
well i'll try, but after all these tumblr posts it's hard to find the non-hashtaged-teenage rebel/philosopher/myopinions post without repost
mineisbetter
so nobody's going to mention leo's tiny ponytail?
MrPredator
ldraptor
I really can't see that guy not being a troll, I really really can't.
johnnybeg00d
*cough* check around these comments. Someone here is arguing for him. So it's likely a real thing, at least to someone.
ldraptor
Yeesh...
Assholedriver
As a chemistry teacher, the nice thing is, most everything is burning, always...
LurkersGottaLurk
No, you're an Asshole Driver. >:o
jacquelanne
as far as gas station names go, the Pump and Munch is my favorite
RelartOfGivia
Splooge & cruise
justllama
Squirt and Split is what we've always called it.
RelartOfGivia
Splash & dash
idiotn00b
Do the mathematic, it makes sense
LopsidedStapler
http://imgur.com/gjBS15k The amount of neckbeardage here is incredible.
MrProg
That Taco Bell one has exactly 100,000 notes. It just feels....nice.
wessyfbaby
http://imgur.com/TgFTDoX
truOG
Sometimes if a post has one away from a round number (499, 3299 etc.) I'll up vote it just so that's it's even
NoiceSmart
I too do this.
Moonsmoonsmoons
I down vote to do that too
FlatPlutoSociety
I'm tempted to register for a Tumblr account just to fuck that up.
Talks2Much
some people just want to watch the world burn
TadpoleHitler
Not worth it.
FlatPlutoSociety
Trust me, nowhere near tempted enough to actually do it.
Akeera
I transfered money from one bank account to the other yesterday and it evened out the cents perfectly to .00
ThePieceKeeper
It evened out the dollars to 0 in both accounts cause money is
klingbolt
I read that as "it evened out to .00"
hecknbamboozlin
I'm curious how the "Roamin' Cathotic" joke met OP's rigorous selection criteria
BELGIANfries
like this: I open th folder with tumblr screenshots, suddenly: black out. Only my laptop still has energy. I feel something... (1/2)
BELGIANfries
It brushes my shoulder, what is it? It's the Roamin' Cathotic joke. It's attacking. It bursts trough my screen, right in the folder. (2/2)
johnnybeg00d
This should be higher up. I laughed. Thank you!
SarahWaitForItBelle
"Then she ran inside and ate more cheesy potatoes". Hahahahaha. Died.
ThebabyAteMyDingo
does anyone know where a lot of makeup?
creamcorn3
when you WHERE a lot of makeup
veronicamarsdestroyerofworlds
It's gotten to the point where the mere mention of a "nice guy" makes my vagina shrivel up and attempt to make a run for it
limerind
with regards to #3, i hope my future wife isn't alive yet. i plan to marry someone who marries for me for my money. now i just need money...
MyPalmsSpaghettiKneesWeakArmsSpaghettiTheresVomitOnMySpaghetti
How...how much of an age difference were you hoping for?
limerind
at least 40 years.
MyPalmsSpaghettiKneesWeakArmsSpaghettiTheresVomitOnMySpaghetti
limerind
well i plan to live to 120. it's embarassing to have a wife over 80.
MyPalmsSpaghettiKneesWeakArmsSpaghettiTheresVomitOnMySpaghetti
PamelaSplooshPoovey
I hear ya. My goal is to be a trophy wife. I just need to get hot and lose a few IQ points
lily10110
I wanted to be a trophy wife. But I'm marrying a mechanic instead. I think it's cause I didn't do step 1.
PamelaSplooshPoovey
All about step 1, ladybro. Also step 1.5, fake it til you make it
Veit
Re: the last one; that seems like a cruel thing to a person with an identified mental illness. To just go "THIS IS YOUR DISORDER, YO."
Cheesecakecrush
I thought this one is silly because she could be eating something far worse for herself. Like Taco Bell.
Groznek
I mean, it's important to make sure that a person clearly knows what they're dealing with, but these things take fuckin' tact.
Groznek
And that seems like a pretty egregious lack of tact.
Veit
I agree on both counts. But don't you think that she must've known? She might not have called it pathological eating, but she probably knew.
WhatAmIDoingIDontEven
TIL I'm a chemist.
morgrimmoon
To be a chemist you also need to know how to put the fire out without anyone getting hurt. Preferably before you light the fire. Have fun!
Kinderschlager
me too!
itslanamax
Why did they waste a truck load of potatoes just to show her how much potatoes she eats?
Supernerdtastic
There's this magical thing called water. Had to wash the dirt off when removing from the earth in the first place, no? ;D
iwishvaderwasmydad
Cheesy Potato Lady: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJGIMd3_LfY
thebigleezy
She is big but honestly not as big as I was expecting
itsKevin
I was hoping that was the truck full of potatoes part :'(
MondieHoo
How is she still alive?
Limerickbound
wuuuuuuuuuut, how is she alive?
mollyeileen
I just found the full episodes of this show on Netflix. There goes my afternoon.
manualoverride
Wear* Fedora Douche WEAR
tangelo
It's a trilby, not a fedore.
manualoverride
Fedora* :) - but yes I concede, it was a Trilby
stitch67
So for some reason the word wear didn't look like a word and then for about 2 minutes I forgot how to read
manualoverride
OMG - I thought that when I typed it... *Wait is that right... I should spell check that before posting*
Itsgabythough
I was about to say the same
Aar0ns
Thank you.
AuBoss
*Trilby douche
NoiceSmart
HAY GIRLS!
tuc0001
"did you know... that I'm a fucking piece of trash who should've been internetforbidden."
TitansAllTheWayDown
I read that part very gayly
NoiceSmart
Haha! Me too. Any time it's spelled with an A, I feel it has sass.
TheFireNationAttacked
"Chemists are never happy unless something is burning." My chemistry teacher in HS was pyrophobic and we never had fun labs.
TemetNosce000
not since the accident...
MyCatOwnsMySoul
I lit my hand on fire in Chemistry class once.
ThisIsEmilyPingingBackAndFlyingLikeACheeseSandwichTiedToABrick
My friend poured phenol on my hand in chemistry. Washed it off in the sink. Turns out you shouldn't use water on a phenol burn :P
Laurararose
My chem teacher once helped me make a flamethrower. In class.
MrStark1995
In all seriousness, the man in the picture WAS my chemistry teacher in high school.
IntergalacticFlyingDolphins
Yeah my freshman year chem teacher did no demonstrations at all. Ever. It sucked
Solisav
So what you're telling us is that he was never happy.
FreeRadioAlbemuth
I can't come up with a clever joke about Walter White and fire.
sipos0
My mum's a chemistry teacher and lights the gas coming out of the gas taps to make a jet of fire.
xfumo
Was he the Hound?
Numerion
might it be because...THE FUCKING FIRE NATION ATTACKED AND HE WAS FROM THE SOUTHERN WATER TRIBE?
TheFireNationAttacked
I defeat the Water Tribesmen like @TheBoulder defeats blind little girls.
TheQUARRYTheBOULDERSLesserKnownFather
I get the reference, and don't you mock my son you little bastard.
captainredbeard
My high school chemistry teacher never once allowed us in the lab. It was all bookwork and tests. No experiments.
TheGayPenguin
We had a fun chem teacher who burned stuff, but I got the other guy. We did play bingo with his silly catch phrases, though.
Pekwachnamaykoskwaskwaypinwanik
Pyrophobic chemist? yep definitely in the wrong line of work...
myr14d
Probably why he ended up teaching instead of you know, actually being a chemist.
mitotinytims
he's still doing chemistry as a teacher. Perhaps not wet-lab work, but still chemistry.
zasolka
Thats sad because exploding hydrogen bubbles was a highlight of my HS chem class
Flucksy
I liked burning metal salts in flames to change the color. I liked that one.
icypants
I had this great nun who was like 95 with desensitized hands. She'd grab boiling beakers and spill concentrated acids on herself no problem.
paul289
A chem professor at my college set a banana on fire to see what it would smell like.
ThisIsEmilyPingingBackAndFlyingLikeACheeseSandwichTiedToABrick
Does it smell nice? I'm curious now.
Dogester
@chemistrydoc Your opinion on this...."matter"?
Jesusberry
HA! I get it......."this".......
chemistrydoc
This chemist seems like he is a little crazy. I really want to talk to him about this matter. Let me atom and we'll have a discussion.
skyblazed
Well, you certainly lepton the opportunity for that.
droomph
That's physics
skyblazed
Chemistry too though, tenuously. Quantum mechanical studies on electrons is very much a field of chemistry.
Iamgonnaspankyousohard
How is that cheesy ham-planet still alive?
ThatEngineer
How can she run?
Supernerdtastic
I'd say she obv doesnt. :/
silentrebel
I have so many follow-up questions, but most of them are just me shaking her and yelling, "WHY!?!?!?"
KateUptonsNipples
I feel like I've read that you can survive off potatoes and some type of dairy supplement given the two meet all nutritional requirements.
kreyll
I do know that potatoes are almost a complete source of everything. But yeah, she could certainly still overeat on them.
slashleylizette
Pls provide detailed directions to this cheesy ham planet you speak of
Iamgonnaspankyousohard
Lol that's hilarious
aSlaveToChaos
I find myself very much enjoying your username.
TJsAwesomeName
HEALTHY AT EVERY SIZE, SHITLORD! But seriously, how has she not gotten a heart attack from all that cheese?!
Iamgonnaspankyousohard
lol at shitlord
MrJohnsonAndTheJuiceCrew
fat shaming is cool now? gosh, i can never keep up...
HelenPauley
There is a whole sub-reddit dedicated to it! I go there sometimes when I feel like cheating on my diet!
HelenPauley
R/fatpeoplehate. Also r/fatlogic and r/fatpeoplestories.
butteredbread
Poor dietary choices are poor choices no matter your bmi
Iamgonnaspankyousohard
It's not so much because she's fat, it's mostly because you would think she would die from only eating potatoes and cheese.
zeradeth
You are incredibly rude to say something like that. I get that she's making bad choices, but she's still a person. Grow up.
AnaemicRoyalty
I'm sorry you got downvoted so much, I agree with you :)
rebirthofwonder
I agree with you, for what it's worth. When you draw an arbitrary cut-off line for compassion, you turn into a tyrant.
Iamgonnaspankyousohard
calm down there sir lancelot
zeradeth
Your comment was exactly what I was reading in the comments on YouTube, and I am disgusted that you could say such vile things.
Iamgonnaspankyousohard
I actually don't care what you think though. So. Awkward.
Flucksy
Flawless victory.
zeradeth
No, okay? I went and watched that video and I felt sorry for her. Then I read the comments, and they pissed me right the fuck off.
Flucksy
Well, stay off the internet because I really doubt it's gonna change.
AnaemicRoyalty
Potatoes actually contain all of the nutrients you need except for like one which is found in dairy. It's not ideal but it's doable.
butteredbread
I call bullhorn on this "science"
spiketherapper
Cheese is dairy so that's a wrap folks.
Iamgonnaspankyousohard
Seriously? That's extremely convenient for her.
AnaemicRoyalty
Yeah that's how we Irish people were able to survive primarily on potatoes and butter... Until the incident...
imotsme
Oh yeah... *shakes head* *tuts*
Nikovani
that's a lot of potatoes
IWRITEEVERYTHINGINCAPS
THAT'LL BE 4 BUCKS BABY, YOU WANT FRIES WITH THAT?
IMakeLotsOfReferencesAndRemakes
Guys! I found why all those Irish people died!
wellthisisaname
Ha.
PirateMonkE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GbaUVBjrBJA
ChelBel
Just the best!
makemepancakes
This shit is on Netflix, damnit. Now I have to watch all of it.
makemepancakes
I want cheesy potatoes now too, but I suspect by the end of the episode I will not.
thegriffin88
I didn't know hippos could cry...
catsarecoolandstuff
Yeah I'm sorry but it makes me so pissed off that they dumped all those potatoes down a fucking hill when there are people starving to death
DYREplus
Luckily potatoes are pretty tough so hopefully poor and homeless people in the area took advantage.
decarnatedame
That's a lot of nuts! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PbE3k9LG9A
therealgiraffe
You can almost survive on potatoes and milk: http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2828/could-i-survive-on-nothing-but-potatoes-and-milk
iHaveDoneNothingButTeleportBreadFor3Days
Your whole building smells of potatoes!
AssamLaksa
What about cheese?
imnotcreativesothisismyusername
She must be from Idaho.
NotLiable4Dmg
Multiple whole raw potatoes
Nikovani
OMG OMG OMG IM FREAKING OUT
baconthegiraffe
a waste of potatoes
Muchadoaboutnothing
That was my first reaction.
lily10110
I'd be the person at the bottom of the hill grabbing the potatoes before everyone else got to them... 'Cause I love potatoes.
Kastovin
Who does not love the almighty spud?
floatlikeabutterfry
She has successfully suppressed her sexual appetite.
getthismanabeer
I don't think they got your reference. Maybe Ron did.
floatlikeabutterfry
Old post about a guy who would eat a whole raw potato every time he wanted to have sex.
pmmedemboobies
And everyone else's.
OtakuShepherd
Classic RonSwmasonsLongLostSon
HighwayToTheDangerZone
I felt queasy after reading that one :(
supruru
What show is the potato one from?
discocunt
Freaky Eaters. Another "Learning Channel" classic.
NickelbackDidNothingWrong
If I had to guess, it's that My Strange Addiction show. And yeah, I'm pretty sure it's TLC.
imnotcleverenoughforthis
Freaky Eaters. And I just saw a clip where a woman was straight up putting mayo on Cheetos.
Duk3Nukem
my strange addiction
Leucienweaver
I must know this too.
VadiseRex
I saw it on Freaky Eaters on Netflix a couple weeks ago.
Duk3Nukem
my strange addiction
littlespacebased
It's from Freaky Eaters on TLC. It's awesome. There's a lady who eats like, a barrel of tartar sauce a month.
flamingflamingo
God, the kid in the fedora in the makeup one. Those images make me feel monstrous. I want to set him and all his ilk on fire.
AuBoss
*trilby
stephron
I think it's actually a trilby.
tuc0001
Tehadam
That guy looks like someone I know, but it isn't him.
HardcorePunography
Bash some common sense into him with a baseball bat, yep.
jetblue7
he looks so familiar anyone know who it is?
Diax1324
*trilby
eggmuffin
Are all messages presented in that format equally cringeworthy? It really seems that way, doesn't it?
Abso
My theory is that those pictures are either worthless or cringey. Nobody wants to share the worthless ones, so we just see cringey.
johnnybeg00d
That's... that's a both likely and reasonable theory. Although, the parodies can be ok sometimes.
Abso
I wasn't sure what was happening because I thought that was a girl in the hat.
TheSadCafe
Same here, haha. I finally figured out he was saying HE was a nice guy, and that he thinks women in makeup are ugly. I don't think he's nice
MaxxiDotPad
What kind of "nice guy" goes out and calls girls ugly for wearing make up? God, with that kind of attitude, I'd rather be a dick.
MrFastZombie
Where makeup.
Ijoinedjusttodownvoteyou
There makeup.
Pandapool
4panel. Fedora. "Nice guy." "Prefers no makeup." SO MUCH CRIIIINGE.
DidSomebodyCallForAnAdult
He also new witch "where" too use. Nice guy and genius? Who can compete?
johnnybeg00d
Don't forget the 'Hay' and the licking-the-pussy motion. Not sure what the heck to make with this guy.
graehall
That image kinda made my skin crawl.
notapepper
I'm actually pretty sure that's my brother in law, or else I just found his Internet Douchebag doppelganger. I'll let y'all know!
notapepper
OK, I heard back! He was as surprised as I was at seeing himself resemble a twatnozzle of such epic proportions. So, not him. Sorry!
[deleted]
[deleted]
Boulderzer
Upvoting for username!
notapepper
Myth: busted. It is NOT my brother-in-law.
imotsme
Better deliver!
notapepper
Just call me Pizza Hut. Ba-dum-bum-tsh.
Lastdarkninja
You better.
notapepper
I did! Delivered like an OBGYN! Gonna start my own practice and everything. All major insurance accepted!