Date went horribly, horribly wrong...

TL;DR Went on date with a bombshell, found out her dirty secret, won't be seeing "her" anymore.

So, I'm a bit of a loser. I only have the balls to approach women online because I'm visibly poor and never know how to present myself. That's a whole different story... What matters here is that I finally met someone awesome! For the sake of reference, I'll just call her Loo.

So Loo and I had hit it off almost immediately and spent the better part of 6 months talking to one another. We both loved gaming, both struggling to find a solid career, both embarrassed by failure. It seemed like a match made in heaven... It all came to a screeching halt one night.

We had been taking things very slow because I was afraid of getting burned, but after her angelic patience, I finally agreed she should come over to my place (I know... 6 months and still no invitation home... told you, bit of a loser...) When she arrived I had already started cooking and the mood was very playful. She kept doing flirty things like running her finger up my back from behind while I was at the stove and giggling.

Fast forward a bit, we eat, flirting continues, etc... Finally we break out the booze and get into some intense make-out session on the couch. Honestly, it was great. I felt like a horny high school boy all over again! That is until she got up and I saw something poking out the back of her dress from between her legs...

Now, I'm a reasonable guy... I try not to think the worst of people, but I could not for the life of me think of anything else that it could be... And after 6 months of getting to know this person, this is SOMETHING THEY SHOULD TELL YOU! Unfortunately, I had no idea how the fuck I was supposed to bring this up... What was I supposed to say? "Hey, is that a tail under your dress or are you just happy to see me?" It didn't help that she was really tall for a woman with stronger legs than most... My suspiciousness was through the roof!

I was very awkward after that and she could plainly see I wasn't being normal... I must've come off bipolar or something because she had this look of concern on her face. Then an idea clicked... I'll test her... So I ask her if she could run to the corner store and get me some medication because I was suddenly feeling very ill. I offered to pay and she agreed. At this point, I'm fumbling with my wallet because I'm such a nervous wreck... I hand Loo the change. She looks at the money, then back at me and asks: "How did you know?"

I told her I could see her tail poking out. I snatched up my $3.50 from her hand and said "damnit monster! I ain't givin' you no tree-fiddy!" It was at this point the 40ft creature from the paleolithic era ran out my door roaring.