Nartan457
128579
2137
104
Apr 15, 2017 3:31 AM
Nartan457
128579
2137
104
FaithAlone
You're an imagineer, imagine this thing.
crazyspelling
CHRIS, DO NOT DRINK THAT SMOOTHIE!
tryingtogetdownvoted
Skeptical this is real based on inverted dates
Beartrails
cousteau
The one about WWII pretty much nailed it.
TheDoughJoe
That was wild from finish to start.
Skiggityscatt0
thornus67
CorgisButtsDriveMeNuts
Could this be written in any more impractical form/font/format?!??
DoctorWhoots420
Taking poo while reading this. Tried the cough thing. And all it did was make my penis flex.
IronicUsername
That's disappointing to hear, I was really hoping that would be a game-changer.
DoctorWhoots420
Well I already finished most of the deed so I think it'll work if your just starting lol
AGorgonMadeMyPenisHard
Apparently this person is friends with real-life Aiden @DTSaranya
ninjaoftheworld
I want to be friends with this person so will send me this stuff all the time as well. It's goddamned delightful.
Sarrv
Is this the guy from Waffles and Pancakes?
idunnowattosay
that might b the bestest friend who ever friended
DepressedPenguin
That's one long phone
elgringocontos
Does it bother anyone else that the text messages go from most recent to oldest? I want then I'm reverse order..
Rhisereld
I was at first, but the canoe story was the perfect finisher.
MrTroysWildRide
I hope he finished, ifyouknowwhatimean!
TheCen
Yes
DangerNoodleCharmer
What a fucking trip. +1
greyzacharius
This is my spirit animal.
wangtangle
poot
nintyuk
The eyebrow exercise one got me I must admit.
allHailShiva
I want to know the relationship b/w these two ? Also why op is not replying? And i want a friend like this too
TheyCallMeATree
its a compilation of his texts, you can see in some places were it was incorrectly photoshopped
allHailShiva
CharlesCroll
I sent this to my wife to show her that I have a twin somewhere in the UK.
CeleryBathtub2k19
EY DEFUCK DID I EVER DO TO YOU
Youtro
Completely lost it at "how long does it take to shit your own bodyweight" lol
Dayrest
Totally punch that baby right in its thick eyebrowed face.
eggmuffin
Obviously. My wimpy punch wouldn't kill, permanently disfigure, or even traumatize it. And then I get £ 1 000 000. There's no downside.
AliBarber
Right? Evil little shit
GlowGreen
Assuming I wouldn't get arrested or punished in any way, I would punch a baby full force for $50. Would probably kill it but meh.
Echo18
I would punch that baby for free. I've always wanted to punch a baby.
NZSheeps
CitizenDickbag
It doesn't say how hard the punch has to be. So make fist, light tap to cheek, chaching.
Dedeurmetdebaard
graceinsheepsclothing
Will anyone else besides the money giver see me punch the baby? It'd be easier if not.
Clayman8
Its a baby. Theyre evil by default anyway. The cash prize is just a bonus
birdspy
this made me snicker
FirstThingThatCameToMind
shit, I wouldn't even have to be promised it was evil. Babies are assholes.
MindRape
for 1 million dollars? I'd elbow drop that sucker
tibris
wait, you want me to punch a baby AND you will pay me a boatload of money to do it? am I gonna get arrested, cos it wasn't fun last time.
Muttmutt
*coughs*
CounterPuncher
Fluffycorn
No you better rock forth and back and pretend to be in a canoe ... : ) Yes that canoe
wobuckman
leftypride
DON'T POOP!
jayneebutidontgotagun
I get it.... because you're looking at this while pooping...
skogkatt
No responses in six months. Silent treatment game on point.
Dannyxrain
Eh, I've gotten longer
TheCen
The responses are cropped out. There is a bad crop near the bottom.
boardswhenbored
It wasn't until that crop that I thought... no way Chris hasn't responded yet.
itgotupanditdancedaway
That makes me feel better. I was afraid Chris was dead.