cannibalthemusical
26748
678
13
Jul 8, 2026 3:18 PM
cannibalthemusical
26748
678
13
grandestgrandeur
Oh look, see? Mitch is doing JUST fine, wave to the voters, senator!
OtisTDrunk
Jewdakris
Would be great if someone just tripped over the plug
WackyWavingInflatableArmFlailingTubman
Barnacles gotta be the worst
clang2101
Why aren't the democrats demanding proof? Republicans would be screaming from the roof tops.
zFUBARz
Dying how he lived. Fucking the American people with procedure and lies.
Yupurineutah
Take the straw out of his nose and let him go! 💀🫡
TupacAintDead
Do t compare that fucking ghoul to this amazing turtle.
FartingWiener
THAT'S what this is! I've been staring at it for like 2 minutes trying to figure out what I was looking at. I kept thinking maybe it was a petrified octopus
sfrinlan
I really don't get all the hoopla. Brain dead is how McConnell has spent the last 400 years, so I don't get why this is even considered a change.
akafluffy
yeah, but he's braindead and not doing evil shit right now, which is a HUGE improvement
Jamnew60
All they have to do is put Old Mitch on a beach so he can dig a nest with his flippers!
sadurdaynight
If i were brain dead my job would have me replaced within a week.
bloobiebloob
How dare you libel that poor Cheloniidae
newwoolmonosta
exactly; i feel bad for this terrapin
dripstone
seems fitting given that's how he operated the whole time while in office.
Saturniidae
I hope he's in exquisite pain and is gripped by panic the entire fucking time, the same as what he did to America.
jdarksun
Someone please remove the barnacles from this poor creature 😭
TheWeebleWobler
He's never been a better senator
lickahippy4fun
There's no rule against reanimated corpses running for office. They are installing a chip in his brain so they can continue to meat puppet him after his heart stops beating.
darthinebriated
So pretty much the same thing they did with Feinstein?
DemSumBigAssRidges
Imagine dying... and the ONLY THING people are concerned with is your replacement. That's your legacy, Mitch.
Thresholdpush
His body will be falling apart in 3 weeks.
cyclone0619
I don't know. This picture of him looks way better than the last time I saw him.
ParaspriteHugger
Don't be fooled, he's essentially being held together by the barnacles.
Sonicschilidogs
Bold of you to assume he hasn't turned to dust like Mother Gothel, Voldemort, or the Skeksis Emperor.
Thresholdpush
I'm certain they've a whimpering, wheedling Chamberlain just quivering to replace him.
xj4low
I think they are just going to Weekend at Bernie's him for a few weeks. He is already brain dead. That basically means he is being kept alive due to machines.
Uselesstoy
People stay alive for years in a coma.. Since he's brain dead does that make deterioration faster? It makes sense to me if it is due to body parts not receiving brain signals or something like that.
Thresholdpush
Everything has shut down due to lack of brain function. The machines circulating blood/oxygen keep the husk alive, but all of the organs have already died along with the brain. He's already begun to decompose, if he is indeed braindead. Reports that he was found unconscious with no pulse, after an indeterminate amount of time, certainly point to it. Even after a few minutes with no oxygen, you're almost guaranteed death or at the very best severe brain damage.
Uselesstoy
Holy Shit! I had no idea.. and the plan is to let him rot for several weeks until the replacement deadline? The Republican party are complete ghouls.
Thresholdpush
Indeed. It's grotesque. Alas, I'm actually pretty sure he'd want them to use his odious corpse to prevent a non-maga republican from replacing him in a special election.
ImJustHereAtThisPoint
Why show that?
Theslipofashipcansinkalip
https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1NDhsYmhjZHB6ZXN6YTJ5OHU3d2g2cjZ2MnBjbnY5N2ZneGNkMW43NyZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/uUIFcDYRbvJTtxaFNa/200w.webp
Yupurineutah
One of my favorite movies.
swofromtherock
Why not just move on?
ImJustHereAtThisPoint
Oh I am. I don't get everyone's hostility for me asking simple questions about this, and my curiosity has officially ran out. Have a good un
swofromtherock
See ya bitch
ImJustHereAtThisPoint
Yeah. That shit. It's childish and I don't get it, but hey whatever
4etherling
Take some time and consider how many people downvoted you. Each of your downvotes was a person who could see you weren't taking time to self reflect and find a more appropriate way to express yourself. Bye bitch.
DukeSliscus
What the hell are you actually asking here?
cannibalthemusical
First day on the internet?
animatronicChristmasChickens
Ooh, no, this is almost certainly Marz/Mars, a notorious sea lion. Block and move on
cannibalthemusical
Oh nvm I see you were referring to the dingus, not me. Carry on citizen
ImJustHereAtThisPoint
Nope. Avoiding the question?
cannibalthemusical
Nope.
It's a sick tortoise.
Maybe it's too subtle to string together, but Mitch has often been associated with various Testudines, often in a humorous and/or disparaging manner in the internets political meme culture.
Hope that clears it up for you.
ImJustHereAtThisPoint
Oh so you're just showing a miserable turtle as a bad attempt at a joke AND you're a dick. Thanks
foreverinchains
Aww, sweetie. You decided to be a dick, and now you want to play the victim because they responded in kind and hurt your little feelings?
Why are you so fucking fragile, bud?
Iblamemyparentstoo
See, where you see a miserable turtle I see a turtle's life being saved. Pessimism is merely lazy thinking and nothing more.
cannibalthemusical
Just matching your energy my dude. Sorry it didn't feel great for you.
SecondSince
You attempts are getting sadder and sadder. Just like you!
onushka
Can someone please explain why the GOP need these tree extra weeks.
MagnumRadhard
Massie.....
genericanamoly
Only reason I can think of is that they know people will rejoice when he ded. They also want to control the news, and they dont want his death taking over their news stories they use to manipulate. Idk best guess.
QuatermainFT
the party is afraid they might lose a special election for his seat in the senate, so they are hoping to push replacement out to the regular election in November. lose doesnt necessarily mean a dem will take it, there are some gop members who they don't want elected who could run and do well in the special election but would probably not win the regular.
Caliitali
To avoid a special election where saying can run including Thomas Massie.
GeriatricMillennial
This is the answer, specifically that the timeline before that date would give a special election earlier than the November elections, and if someone like massie wins, the MAGA Republicans won't have the votes they need. If they delay, they maintain an advantage until the general election.
DaHayHay
If he “dies” before that window, it triggers a replacement by the KY governor, who is a democrat (though I think the KY state legislature has already hobbled that process: the pick must be from the same party). 🎈
RKO921
No it doesn't
iggylights
KY changed the law in 2024, probably because they knew Mitch was on the way out. The governor used to appoint someone to finish the term but now a special election is triggered if he is declared dead before August 5th.
JetrelPixelArt
Massie's rubbing his hands right now looking for some sweet, sweet revenge.
ElbowDeepnInAElasmotherium
What happens if it's after Aug 5th? One less senator voting in the Senate for the next 6montha until after 2026 elections?
randomwalrus
Too close to midterms, so too short of a term for whomever ended up elected. I'd imagine.
ElbowDeepnInAElasmotherium
Since McConnell can't vote from home or the hospital that's one less Republican vote until January on any legislation. I don't see how this is a loss for Democrats. If it was vacant and a special election is run, it would mean a 6 month term for Barr or Booker, but they would still need to campaign for November. Would a special election allow flipping the Senate if Dems won?