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https://www.sandiegouniontribune.com/2023/02/18/fbi-records-deepen-mystery-of-dig-for-civil-war-era-gold/#:~:text=Dennis%20Parada%20waged%20a%20legal,over%20to%20the%20treasure%20hunter
Recent Court Rulings (March 2025): Federal Judge Amit Mehta ruled that the FBI has not yet proven it conducted an adequate search for all requested files. He ordered the Department of Justice to provide further explanation on how the documents were searched and why specific operational plans and videos were not delivered.
ToSisPoS
Great. It can be used for reparations to every human being forcibly brought there and sold as property.
albakSPrince
If I " CLAIMED my ass tastes like cotton candy, there would be a line of dumb shit who are willing to lick away, stopping once in a while to ask "why don't I taste cotton candy yet?"
khaoselement
The biggest "the fuck did you think was gonna happen" I've ever seen.
todaytomorrowwillbeyesterday
Why anyone would tell on themselves has always been a mystery to me
9z2nf02h
Not sure how you'd fence 7 tons of gold without attracting the attention of the federal government anyway.
Fripperton
It probably ended up in the hands of whoever was president in 2018.
keyblader1985
This is why if I ever find a large sum of money, no I didn't.
11Weasel11
Like finding a square grouper on the beach in South Florida.
VikingsAreNinjaPirates
And I bet you'd have enough money to pay the fine for digging without a permit. You're rich now. The laws don't apply to you.
BeardedViking
Digging? What digging? That hole was there when I got here.
Cbouch4rd
During the last Trump administration there was corruption and stealing like that? I certainly hope this guy didn't vote for Trump.
Becker37
Don't ever trust the government. They're not your friend
iusedtodream
Similar thing happened to my grandad. Twice. Pops could always find gold, but he could never keep it from the rich suits. Life isn't fair.
Niagaran
ACAB goes all the way and all the way down
Otteritup
Why not just pay the fine? I mean you just found a billion in gold.
Huor
Never tell the government about buried treasure, they will ALWAYS take it.
sadurdaynight
especially gold currencies. I think there's some law they use that says they have the right to confiscate old currencies. So, they're more than happy to seize old gold and silver coins.
todaytomorrowwillbeyesterday
Salvager here. I stopped looking in the oceans for treasure the day the world decided that ALL TREASURE found within territorial waters, be handed over to the governments. Never once offering a PENNY for the work it took us to find and extract it from its location... Short story > why do their work for them?
tzahtman
That is why I keep my Pog collection a secret.
umbrael
Dig it up, melt into ingots. Slowly trade for cash over time. As it is, we all know the feds melted 'em down too & lined their own pockets.
Brunomars1
I suppose you should have went ahead and dug up the treasure and hid it until such a time you could reveal it to the “Proper Authorities”. Seems you can’t trust anyone these days, especially our National and Federal Government.
LordHosk
It wasn't on his land, he didn't have the authority to dig there, and he couldn't have brought in heavy equipment without someone noticing.
spontaneous9
You have the right to remain silent.
SedatedSl0th
Where’s that “what do you do if the cops want to talk to you? You shut the fuck up” guy when you need him
spontaneous9
Problem was, he volunteered the information. Maybe it would have been a crime to tap into that cache in tiny increments, maybe it wouldn't have been noticed. We can't possibly know. Couple gold coins now & then, who'd have suspected? Grocery money, keepin' it small, under the radar, could have become a nice revenue trickle selling some of it off to various private collectors, working through aliases, sourcing buyers one at a time, spreading it out over years etc. Who knows.
SedatedSl0th
If you make less than $500/month you don’t have to report it to the IRS. At least that’s what I’ve been told, so I invoice 499.95 month one, 499.95 month two, then 0.10 month three, for my side gigs.
spontaneous9
Problem with that, is that they also have info sources into your banking b/c of SS# being required for a bank acct, so they can track your spending against your income (or apparent lack thereof), & come after you for NVMS (no visible means of support), making you show receipts for income, prove you didn't steal it, etc., forcing you to reveal how you stayed solvent over time, then fine you for back taxes, fines, fees & interest which usually turns out to be worse than if you had declared it all.
SedatedSl0th
It’s cash and my side business.
lildude52ca
This is something i've always been curious about, cause you never wanna tell anyone where you've found it but they wont let you keep it if
lildude52ca
you dont? So if you do find something how do you get to keep / use / spend it
BigMomsDaughter
#1
Mattnader
Bet he voted trump too
BearbaFett
NEVER CALL THE COPS
dingybasement350
Why the fuck would you tell the FBI that you found a huge stash of gold?
PowerPedant
There's no such thing as "gold detectors".
kurvarVillain
GPR does a good job for many man made objects, like steel strong box in soft earth.
HamSlamwich
Shovels.
Exyr
Heh...yes and no. They make mental detectors that can put a range out that will give an idea if its silver or gold. They also make tool that will give the exact breakdown of what a metal is made of.
AncientArtefact
They make mental detectors that can tell if you're bonkers :-)
Racealistic
I fucking cackled, thanks :D
PowerPedant
That sounds snakeoil-y. How is that supposed to work?
And yes, XRF analysers exist: You have to hold it directly to the material, it'll not work through any amount of soil.
Exyr
Its not precise it just measures density amd gives a likely reading of metal type. Like tin silver gold. But gold and lead are close to the same density. So its a range not exact. But its usually accurate enough to know of its a bottle cap or ring.
LordHosk
Also keep in mind, this isn't gold flakes washed down a river bed, this isn't gold formed in pockets in the formation of rock...
This is piles of mined and refined gold in the form of bars and coins that were lost when a wagon went off a cliff in a snowstorm and was unrecovered due to the war then lost due over time due to mudslide and forest growth.
woodintunoit
Best lesson for "Keep your mouth shut." , ever.
KilroyLichking
Right up there with the guy who foubd a coffee cab if gold 50$ coins that had been stolen wayback when. He losted it on social media and uncle sam cam nocking
folkscallmehi
Call the bondulance
JarJarBinksKisser
i dunt know what the replays are talking about with the coment, yaull know what theu said
Ornado
Right up there with the guy who found a coffee can of gold 50$ coins that had been stolen, wayback when. He posted it on social media and Uncle Sam came knocking.
DrJSJ
https://media2.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1dm5rd21lY2NmYWJsZmg3M3lvYW5uNjZ5c3JiMGp5NXpndGRmNmdrZCZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/9EwnzGNjvmIG4/200w.webp
charliechaplinslookalike
Did you have a stroke?
KilroyLichking
Sry i have giant fingers and a small phone
Neanderthalersutopiaphilandrousanteatersotherbrother
A stroke of genius:)
Frostedjakes
You should type slower.
HellaPictureSeeing
https://media2.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1bTlkYTF1ZmwxMm1jYzVjMWRnanE1aXU3N2Z1d3FvOHR0cTRmcWxmMiZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/OmmaY0HPg24j6/200w.webp
tzahtman
A bondulance, you say?
HufflePuffPuff
I think they just have a southern accent that even text can’t hide it.
SuperIncoherentRantingMan
I think that's better explained by southern education standards than the southern accent...
makalalala
I actually prefer this strangers story told in gibberish.
chormin
Yea, bro, thats their accent
spitfires2000
If you're so committed to find that gold, why not take a weekend to dig a small hole and recover at least some gold before you start telling the FBI your "instruments identified a large quantity of metal" ?
Niagaran
Victim blame much? The FBI bent him over and raped him raw.
akambe
A better tactic would be to claim it's some suspected buried machinery, then after you get the permit it's oops look what I found instead
d14z3p4m
because you could be arrested without permit I assume, I also think there are specific laws about confederate gold.
TheSecondPiewackit
Nonsense. I was out rockhounding.
7qd26tttv7
How would he know for certain it was Confederate gold without digging it up first?!!
d14z3p4m
you think it was dutch gold?
spitfires2000
Wait... WHAT!?!?!?!?!
7qd26tttv7
Spanish doubloons. They minted an overabundance, just playing the numbers game.
jojoyojimbi
it's all the gold the native americans hid from eldorado when they learned about a bunch of gold hungry illegal aliens landing on plymouth rock... they regret not building a wall now
bippityboppitybuttsex
So, why are people still arguing the FBI is anything other than a criminal organization operating under color of law... Started as a blackmailing and extortion organization and moving on to assassinating Americans and covering up the largest child sex trafficking ring in modern history.
How do FBI agents rationalize their membership in an evil organization that makes the world worse, every day.
rbudrick
Bippityboppitybuttsex does not fuck around. Exactly on the money. (Unfortunately, not the actual gold in this case)
bippityboppitybuttsex
BTW, the answer to my question of how they rationalize their membership in that organization is Evangelical Christianity...
FrancsTireur
The more time passes the more im beginning to realise that as a civilisation we may have advanced technologically but sociologically we haven't moved much beyond the feudal age.
Kings, lords and nobles are now called presidents, senators, congressmen and CEOs.
Knights are now called agents and officers.
The vast majority of us too poor to ever pursue a dream or radically change careers, once we have families we're essentially anchored to wherever we happen to be.
And every once in a while 1/
FrancsTireur
The king appears infront of his people wearing his finery and standing behind his seal and instructs his peasants that a vicious enemy is at our borders threatening our way of life and we must set down our plowshares and take up the sword, and in return we MIGHT manage to distinguish ourselves and rise above our station, but most of us will just be hacked to pieces.
Four plus decades on this earth and finally I understand humanities greatest talent; rebranding. 2
ThisNameIsMaybeTaken
Because the more we uncover, the more questions we find, Scully. The truth is out there.
7qd26tttv7
There's also that small lingering matter of the "white supremacy presence within FBI ranks" report that every administration, for decades, promises to finally release yet when the time comes...crickets.
SubiBryant
Because a lot of them help people?
freshthrowaway1138
Al Capone ran soup kitchens...
SubiBryant
😁 perfect
HamSlamwich
Ok but we're more focused on the fact that they choose who to help and who to prosecute based on politics, rather than laws. Only "helping" rich people isn't helping, it's mercenary work.
SubiBryant
Damn, all those kids getting sexually abused were rich? That's wild.
bippityboppitybuttsex
Tell that to Fred Hampton... tell that to Jeffrey Epstein's victims...
SubiBryant
Yeah they should hate themselves. https://www.fbi.gov/contact-us/field-offices/cleveland/news/fbi-arrests-205-alleged-child-sex-abuse-offenders-in-five-day-nationwide-crackdown you have a great weekend.
bippityboppitybuttsex
SubiBryant
Saving kids from sex slavery is almost exactly the same thing as making a strudel. The parallels are uncanny.
Itry2dostuff
Evil people do acts of kindness often to distract, but this source, while it may be true is on a current .gov site which the dump admin controls and has been inserting its own propaganda.
d14z3p4m
what`s the name of that british pedophile who had a charity for kids?