WDE7981
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I married him coz he's a walking, talking furnace.
It's not over til I say it is!
How dare he?!?!
Love you babe!!!
My feet always stay cold.
Butternut hehe
No comment.
Thank goodness Amazon stuff gets dropped off at the door, and not the mailbox.
I don't show affection much, but when I do... TAKE MY LOVE DAMNIT!
I am not your mother. (There may be a Star Wars thing there, not sure. haha)
Uh ew no thanks babe!
Real relationships are not like the movies.
Actually, I'm the hot one!
Rockin' every where
Happens every time, not gonna lie.
True story, bro
Just ignore those goofy eyes down there; you don't wanna know.
Yeah, I'm that wife...
Once again, I'm that kinda wife.
For real, that's me
Smack that booty
Apparently I do this A LOT
No, I won't share my food with you! Get your own!
By this point, he knows how to deal with my crap. And I'm glad for it.
FP edit: wow guys, most viral! Thanks so much. I didn't know how to do an edit on here so hope this works. I guess this where I ask for stuff... Pictures of your pets would be good. Once again thanks!
AtsaMattaForMe
#3
v
spoopinator
Thanks @op for some good ‘uns!
finninthejakesuit
FrenziiTheIMP
This is eerily familiar, but that is not my partner's username.
Ulthirm
#1 listen this is why I have my Chihuahua at this point. She's a living bundle of bearable heat and she loves to hide with me under my
Ulthirm
Blanket to sleep. You should try it, top notch heat.
scr59
I, for one, welcome our cold footed overlords
squeakypanda
I wouldn't mind warming my girls feet up but I'm a wizard.
TatanyaTanatia
Any other spouses here ever said, "THIS IS MY CORNER!" When arguing that they are NOT hogging the covers?
LateNightBunnyParty
#10 Sexier words have never been written.
coldlings
Is your husband my husband?
WDE7981
If you live in Florida, it's possible. ?
pandasmakemehappy
When your wife presses her naked ass against you and farts directly on your balls. That is ... Something special.
FalmouthedFrankie
#2... no way I'm sleeping if the spouse is angry.
yourbassist
detectivekagami
Noooooo, go get another one or something to watch Moana
orionrh
dm9982
I think you’re my spouse’s twin....
theMightyPlatypus
Should trade and see who notices first
dm9982
???
v
MoonRiverFrost
#23 during the winter, I cocoon in my sleep, so we've decided to have two different blankets to avoid midnight thievery.
Puvaradivi
Been doing separate blankets all 7 years of marriage. Nothing wrong with each having their own, especially if the alternative is irritation.
LordDenmark
I understand no references here
MyOtherShipIsAPython
Quite strange indeed.
Sarcasticbombastic
Lucky
blumpk1npie
If you never feel the stone cold leathery scrape of a woman's heel on your back, this is a +
Mayyybe
Lady here... I’ve never understood why ladies do this??! I’ve never wanted to do this lol
GingerParade
Because my feet were really cold last night, okay?
LincLoud
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN9CjAfo5n0
wizdro
It's a "different" experience, but different =/= better. Do something that betters you.
SnooziestDragon
Yeah I'm none the wiser.
MurmurationOfStarlings
I upvoted and favorited immediately based on the title alone. Was not disappointed.
cheeseplate1971
Number 10 made me roll my eyes. Wives will say this and drive around with the check engine light on for weeks.
onesharedmoment
I hope to have the joy one day of finding a spouse and introducing them to the imgur world.
crushingbore
As someone who runs hot, I think I'd be into the cold feet thing. Just say something first.
HappyLittleBoozer
As a furnace, sometimes the cold feet are a sweet relief...when it's expected. It's the stealthy approach that spoils it.
WaitingForWorkToFinish
That’s for sure. And the occasional freezer burn that lasts after the feet have gone
DigYourselfBaby
Please support your local, independent businesses instead of Amazon. Your wallet has more power than your ballot.
IdiotSavantTinker
#1 When coming home from a 30+ mile, 20 degree motorcycle ride, remember to keep your helmet on when you warm your hands on your wife.
sokar30
And now stuff I have sent my wife.
vintagebroad
Sending direct to husband
GrandPoobahDeDoinkOfAllOfThisAndThat
How is it that i am both the husband and the wife in my relationship and we ain't even married?!
EricksonOle
#1 Opposite problem here. My spouse burns with a heat of a thousand suns.
ketro2099
thats me id kill for a cold one :P
MyOtherShipIsAPython
There's a "cracking open a cold one with the guys" joke in there. I'm sure of it.
RatoMolhado
Your spouse is hot, man! You know what I mean!
EricksonOle
MyOtherShipIsAPython
I would gladly welcome any chance to shed some of the internal heat.
Timbagged
Yea my wife is Israeli and just radiates heat. Great in the winter, gtfo in the summer.
PolarHailStorm
I, too, am a furnace. I welcome cold hands and feet. It's like a little heat-sink!
PooPculture
The human torch was denied a bank loan.
jethroismaxbaer5772
My wife and I sleep in separate beds because I run too hot at night.
Sirliasly
I was always cold until I got pregnant. Hot flashes are fun for everyone. I keep the house at 65* and like to cuddle close.
kitamuramiike
Look, you wanted hot, you got it
MahaDevaE
Ahh Planks body yes.
Goblinoftheyear
And don't even get me started on being surrounded by the spouse and the dog
curlyfry11
I am a heater, no cuddling because too too hot. But my feet? Icicles.
WDE7981
One of us has to be the heater, and one of us has to be the freezer. You and I are lucky we've found the one we needed.
uberAIDSwastakenwtf
Perfect relationship is thermodynamic equilibrium
SocoFox
I'm the heater. Even the dog can't sleep next to me for too long. But the wife isn't too cold. After long enough contact we both sweaty.
PaleAsFuck
I'm the heater and my bf cold. Makes it fun for him to cuddle me when we gonna sleep. Steeling my heat and making me cold.
sgnight13
The best thing we ever did for our marriage was get a king size bed. We went without a TV set for a year, but it was worth it
TerryCrews
Our secret? Separate comforters. It's the recipe for longevity.
sgnight13
Ahh yeah my parents do this. Might need to try it out
kiwidutch
* THIS ! Husband sleeps with thinnest douvet despite winter weather, meanwhile I have extra layers on my side AND I have them all to myself!
TerryCrews
I sleep with a thin sheet and a fan pointed at me. My wife sleeps with a 20lbs weighted blanket, 2 down comforters, a bear shin, and a 1/
TerryCrews
A Sherman tank, while still complaining about the fan.
kiwidutch
EXACTLY this! I use a double size douvet folded over on top of my winter douvet and will still get a blanket sometimes. Hubby’s face ! Haha
sordatos
#10 communication. It has nothing to do with "being a mother"
detectivekagami
THANK
Pappadopoulos
Should someone really have to communicate that dishes need to be washed though?
KikiLebeauf
If you're out of clean dishes...
Pappadopoulos
The point being, both people in a partnership in most cases are equally capable of determining when a chore needs to be done and acts on it
netflixandwine
My husband has this habit of offer he will do a chore only once he sees me doing already doing it ... almost worse then not offering at all?
sordatos
Well, kinda a dick move, but you If u don't take that offer he would still keep at it
BoJoTo
From the husband's side. I get question because I dont do it "the right way" or my tasks prioritization doesnt sync. Which leads to attitude
LateNightBunnyParty
How many years of communicating with my husband should it take for him to stop dropping his boxers BESIDE the basket? So far 16 isn't enough
crash217
Oh god, your husband is my wife’s twin. Does he leave his shit everywhere and nothing gets to the sink or trash can too?
LateNightBunnyParty
crash217
LateNightBunnyParty
At what point does it stop being a communication issue, and instead turn into a "stubborn mule of a man" problem?
LateNightBunnyParty
And how many people here are gonna try to make it sound like I'm queen of the harpies for asking him to remember to pick up after himself?
sordatos
I dunno, How many?
cozynester
But there are some things that always need to be done. It shouldn't be the spouses job to tell you when to do your 'chores'
sordatos
But a lot of times is not that the chores are not being done but the standards does it mean to be done are different
TheAlbatrossFromTheMoon
What are you, a caveman?
sordatos
Why?
cozynester
And that is a communication thing. I had a partner get mad at me once because I "Didn't tell" them they needed to use soap cleaning dishes
cozynester
#10 Thiiiiiiiiissssss. If I get mad because you left a yoghurt in the fridge for 8 months it's not my fault. "You didn't say anything" >.>
Alexandraka
With some justification but I've had to teach him a lot of 'adult' stuff...not a fun role as a partner 3/3
PurplePenguin87
Same here. My husband was 20 when we met and had never used a washing machine or dishwasher. His mom is a hardcore coddler/enabler
Alexandraka
Why do parents do this ._. I have yet to become a parent but teaching them basic practical skills is gonna be essential
Alexandraka
After boys and and therefore grown men tend less to their own stuff. I have that with my partner; his mom let him get away with a lot 2/
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cozynester
Why would you assume that I bought the yoghurt? Also why are you assuming my partner is a man?
32Bannanna
In my experience, this isn’t the first conversation like this. No one gets mad over a yogurt; it’s the constant nannying.
cozynester
And then they call you bossy and youre both upset over something silly and avoidable.
cozynester
Also, this was a hypothetical example. Convos like this happen everyday all over the world. I was relating to a meme not trying to attack u
khtad
You’re an adult, use your words.
Alexandraka
Exactly. I feel like it's a male/female thing where girls are often told to tidy up more often than boys and parents will clean up more 1/
zuken
With me and my wife it's the opposite, if I don't keep on her case she wont have clean clothes, dishes, and desk will be covered in food.
zuken
She just doesn't see it if it isn't actively in her way. She doesn't notice when things will become a problem until they are.
Alexandraka
Ufff that must be pretty frustrating for you I imagine :/
zuken
It's definitely the part of the marriage that requires the most work.
Frapporino
Two people will have different standards. Who sets the bar? The most anal? Or the most bossy one?
zuken
Discuss what is reasonable. In my case my partner doesn't handle chores until they prevent her from doing something. It's a problem because
zuken
We get ants when food piles up on her desk. She's late to work whenshe has no clean clothes. It's not a matter of merely different standards
KrakedUp
They're often one and the same.
KnowmSaying
In my experience. The woman does.
cozynester
And, in your experience, is that you or your partner?
KnowmSaying
Just a joke. Don't throw my yoghurt away over it.
Frapporino
Oh man. Now I want yoghurt
MermaidBiologist
Show your partner #10 so they get the message
cozynester
Haha we've had the discussion several times. It's one of those topics that just makes both of us angry because we know we can both do better
TheAlbatrossFromTheMoon
Get a better partner :D
batmanbumantics
It took 2 goddamn years but my bf has upgraded from 26-year-old molly- coddled-child to adult man. NGL, it took a lot of tough love
Alexandraka
I'm on 5 years and it's getting better but yeah...still hard :/ any advice?
batmanbumantics
Find out why they do it. The REAL reason. My bf's mother had done EVERYTHING for him, but once he realised that was the issue he also (with
batmanbumantics
Some prodding) realized he didn't like being so dependent and ditzy.
Alexandraka
Thanks : ) Yeah same with my bf but he also has ADHD and some anxiety (I think) so I have some sympathy towards it but still tiring :/
cozynester
The hard part is finding the line between 'tough love' and 'insufferable bitch' as one other imgur commented
KnowmSaying
Or just throw the tub out and don't overthink the two second task? Trust me that yoghurt didn't exist in his mind. While you watched for
cozynester
This is a theoretical example of the level of task that illicits this emotional response. And what if they were keeping it for some reason?
KnowmSaying
You're right I hadn't thought of that. Maybe it's a misguided attempt at cheesemaking.
KeyLimeAnxiety
This is terrible advice. Dump the yogurt down the sink, rinse the container, and recycle it, don’t throw it out!
KnowmSaying
8 months waiting and letting anger boilup over a yoghurt he didn't. I cannot stress enough that Homer Simpson thing with the monkey
KnowmSaying
Smashing those tin circle things together is how mens brains work 99% of the time.
BigDaddysMeatWagon
Also those tin circles are called cymbals.
BigDaddysMeatWagon
This person has wisdom. Listen to them
jattie
This does men a great disservice. You are adults.
TheDairyPope
Thank you. After all these years, I now know what was really on Homers mind was smashing.
cozynester
I never said my partner was a man. Being in a relationship doesn't mean being responsible for the upkeep of all your partners possessions
KnowmSaying
Goodluck with your healthy relationship that is rocked by an old yoghurt in the fridge because you're so above just tossing it in the bin
arsenicKatnip
Hot take. Mood swings aren't a good reason to lash at your husband and he shouldn't just take them, joking or not.
54r4h
“Lmao I am mean to my spouse” like that isn’t a red flag...
arsenicKatnip
This goes for both genders******
WDE7981
True, but it happens to us all from time to time, to get a bit crabby. We're either sick, or in pain, etc and lash out. It's being human.
Alexandraka
Agreed. Happens to everyone, just need to be mindful of people's feelings (within reason of course)
WDE7981
Also, I have bpd, so sometimes it's hard to control my emotions, even with medication. I can't explain that away.
Alexandraka
Oh yeah that makes sense. Always nice if your partner is extra mindful with deviations from the 'normal'
arsenicKatnip
I partly understand that, but I've dated two people now with it, and both people just.. Used it as an excuse to justify hurtful, spiteful,/1
arsenicKatnip
Jealous behaviors. It's somewhat just, turned me wary of bpd. Ramble ramble.. Although you're still entirely valid friend