DilligafDiva
141090
2833
27
Well they said it’s healthy!
Sep 1, 2020 7:05 AM
DilligafDiva
141090
2833
27
GNiko
Mummies are rare because Egyptian railways used them as fuel for their trains.
R100GSPD
They were also used as fuel for steam locomotives.
SmokyDoggg
Inject Mummy into your bloodstream to keep the plague away
hotsnail
That's pretty cool
temposaur
We ate our relatives when they fought in the WW. The bodies were ashed and due the shortage ashes were sent in tincans to the relatives.
temposaur
Because letter from the front traveled slow, people though it was canned meat substitute from the goverment, so they put that in the soup.
ShenanigansForHireExperiencedBeerTasterAndCraicFacilitator
Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase 'Yummy mummy'.
somnif
Kvothefefe
I mean, MAYBE if it was mellified...
Imnotaclevergirl365
I was having a good day.. we were all having a good day..
Turbolibros
TheDungineer
It's the only food that has everything you need for the human body!
Farger
ITS PEOPLE! SOYLENT GREEN IS MADE OF PEOPLE!!
TheDisscoPotato
“The soylent majority.”
AKrustyTubeSock
Does it vary from person to person?
DopeChicken
Zevulon the great, HE's teriyaki style
CharliMcFarli
SesshouFan22
I had no idea that joke in Futurama was actually based on historic fact. And I don't want to continue knowing .-.
Mokelzwerg
Well they said it’s healthy!
Schmong
In todays edition of shit so fucked up it sounds fake but is actually real..
positiveleroy
There was an episode of Sawbones about this in which Justin absolutely loses his shit laughing at the thought of people snacking on mummies.
VulpineEmpress
I prefer my mummies as jerky - teriyaki style.
greymw
ooh, teriyaki style!
Sloppydrunkcatlady
But that was Emperor Nimbala, who ruled Zuben V over 29 million years ago!
VulpineEmpress
Nah, that was the one Fry ate at the beginning of the episode. This is Zevulon the Great, later gifted to Fry by Farnsworth.
Sloppydrunkcatlady
I know haha I just wanted to quote
VulpineEmpress
FrogBotherer
Ah yes, in the days when visiting the doctor would probably make you die faster.
Jinxer13
"You're gonna have a bite of this mummy dick once a day after dinner and come see me after a week" -prescription probably
NacLac
Unless you had one of the few illnesses that still treated today by old methods. Like leeches. Great for some things, terrible for the rest
Kbantar
Leeches are mainly used now to maintain blood flow for re-attachments, not something that was exactly common back then.
h77IM
That's how homeopathy came around. It worked better than other treatments at the time because it was basically just bedrest + placebo.
NotTinyPancakes
Que Lemon Demon Sweet Bod
NotTinyPancakes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5qBA5-PZgqY it's catchy and interesting if it's true.
VivTheKitsune
It is absolutely true https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mellified_man
CGMR
theheebs25
pfft, you believe in everyone?
BlueDuckPale
I KNEW everyone was LYING about hhaving a 'mummy' AND a 'daddy'
YouCantGetDiseasesFromABird
WHY would a MUSEUM have a MUMMY in it????
RTK4740
Food court.
whatIdontknowcouldfillawarehouse
It's called Marriage
MoreOnMedia
Cause they can have jobs just like daddy can ?
Zahnradfee
That's why we've kept Ötzi on ice. To keep him fresh for consumption.
Blake242
Victorians jumping on every fad food, medical treatment, pet or idea that came along... just like people today!
klaatubaradanickel
In God we trust... ... ... ... Mummy Dust!
OhNoItsTheDramaLlama
They also made paint out of them! Mummy brown was a very popular pigment!
faphappyscreencappy
Yummy yummy, mummy in the tummy!
starflyerwithoutfuel
NeverForgetMrHands
PantherMedic
In Arabia, there was a practice known as mellification. They would get a man near death and feed him nothing but honey and he would bathe 1/
PantherMedic
In it daily. This continued until he died at which point he would be out into a stone coffin and soaked in honey for 100 years. After 2/
PantherMedic
His soaking period had elapsed, they would use the corpse honey sludge that developed to treat a variety of ailments from broken bones 3/
PantherMedic
To malaria. 4/4
xxtoxii
I just googled and they didnt juat eat the mummies, they ate everything, from bones to human flesh as a medicine
404GravitassNotFound
China in 2020:
Vixess
Oh I think they've done a little more than that this year.
ThatNoPicklePeeThatNoPumpARum
Everything you typed there kind of falls under generally eating mummies tho.
DudeMcDude
https://maximumfun.org/episodes/sawbones/sawbones-medical-cannibalism/ —Awesome episode about this on an awesome podcast.
Aseymah
At least they were responsible enough to use 100% of the mummy.
GoodEveningThisIsWhatAButtDoesPBBPPBBTT
Captainplanetmotherfucker
You have ghosts in your blood, you should do cocaine about it. If that fails ground up a 2,000 year old pharaoh and snort that bitch up.
RTK4740
Please do not call my dinner a bitch. You’ll upset my tum tum.
ComcastLover
I should tell you, mummies contained bones and human flesh.
RTK4740
greyspears
your average hot dog probably has the same amount of bones and human flesh.
TacoYeti
Pretty sure nutrimetics stuff is still made from aborted foetus so we aren't out of the woods yet.
TheDipStick00
AlexjoneswatchingTporn
ThatNoPicklePeeThatNoPumpARum
You ok there bud?
alittlekinkinthenuts
AFatRaccoon
Nah, it's just foreskins
dfhowes
Can confirm. I used to perform circumcisions. It didn't pay much but I got to keep all the tips! ?
xxtoxii
https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/the-gruesome-history-of-eating-corpses-as-medicine-82360284/
SexyYoda
sounds like vampire propaganda
sykoticflaw
Yeahhhhh I am 100% not clicking on that this early in the morning
GenevaCat
Its an interesting read. :D
sykoticflaw
I will take your word for it.
titaniumsnail
So, modern Chinese medicine I see? Where they eat everything from crushed fossils to dried animal penises.
battlepants
The dried animal penises doesn't sound so strange to me. If you harvest an animal, you should really use all parts.
battlepants
...of course, that is assuming that they aren't harvesting JUST for the penis. (Looking at you, shark fin bastards...)
drcookieninja
Yeah it's really unfortunate. My friends who went on a trip to Japan actually had some. It's the 'interesting factor' that pull in tourists
moldy1352
Love me some shark penis soup
myloveforyouislikeatruckberserker
modern Chinese medicine is as advanced as western.the superstitious bullshit is what you mean, but then there are backward freaks everywhere
raptorjesuswentextinct4ursinz
TCM is the predominate medicine in China. It’s not just A few kooks. It’s state sanctioned bear bile farms and rhino horn traffickers.
titaniumsnail
If it is as advanced as western why did they recommend a mix of useless ingredients to cure Corona? IIRC it contained coal, licorice root,/1
titaniumsnail
gypsum and other completely inert ingredients which would have zero effect on a virus or even barely soothe the symptoms. /2
myloveforyouislikeatruckberserker
Who is 'they'?
titaniumsnail
The government health officials. It was a huge thing on the news and was heavily criticised.
tarnok
So we've basically always been cannibals.
Nuds
https://open.spotify.com/artist/2deuEAcz6ujNReKbdf2eBN?si=cQbSXaMeRXa4rrDgjMojWw
TheDairyPope
It doesn't count as cannibalism if you don't acknowledge them as people.
JayB662
I’ve never been a cannibal, dunno about you.
tarnok
You ever swallow your blood? What about chewing on your lip or nails? Swallowing seamen. Sounds like we all are.
xizar
Have I ever been a cannibal? you dunno about me.
homoerection
It would technically be endo-cannibalism since the flesh was not fresh, but mummified.
RTK4740
Yours not making it better by reframing it as “we’ve always been into making homemade preserves and canned goods.”