upvotemypics
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Jan 29, 2020 9:22 PM
upvotemypics
130219
5286
144
BrentPeterson
Very cool. Can I get in on some of that M&M action?
friendsofsandwiches
I notice a lot of people dis on the WP as 'biased' and 'bezos news' Getting REAL tired of that shtick.
aronanon
MikeArclight
... I'm wondering how she got past the pay wall
Musklim
And it's a "casual" tweet sponsored by The Washington Post.
backrideup9
How much can she really learn only reading a handful a "free" articles a month?
VulcanP90
More than if she read no articles a month.
HowWasThisUsernameNotTaken
You. I like you.
EekumBokumEekumBokum
My parents bought me an encyclopedia that they expected me to read when I was around that age. Kids aren't all Dumbo's. I was but not all
bouncebounceandtheclaw
I always loved reading from a young age so it's entirely possible. My son does not, but he also has difficulty sounding them out.
Poopaloupe
pretty cool, but the washington post sucks sometimes--I'd call them sensationalists at times perhaps.
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
Gotta keep the lights on somehow.
pirogoeth
Well shes 11 now so by the time shes out of college the washington post will likely be defunct.
GigavoltFox
Unless the kid is also paying for premium, isn't that like 4 articles a month?
01010101011100110110010101110010011011100110000101101101e
John moulaney would approve
pandasmakemehappy
Isn't WaPo the one with the massive list of the US president's lies?
JamesJabberwocky
I've spent my young years reading fiction and escapist novels. I'm now a useless escapist idiot. Yep. Checks out.
WhateverWhateverIDoWhatIWant
The WaPo app is free but reading everything on it is not.
thepsudo
Awesome! WaPo is one of the best news sources in the USA, and that girl is awesome.
buddhafw
9 is what 3rd grade? Maybe? When I was in the 2nd grade I got suspended for bringing a playboy and a mad magazine to school. I peaked early.
FuzzyX
Career guidance councillors would also love her direct answer and then offer an alternative.
R2D2ismyhomeboy
Oh the ol WashPost. Loves lil girls and fires journalists for reminding ppl that a recently deceased bball star was a sex offender. Classic
idontliketheclonebone
scooterthepolluter
I miss Robin Williams.
GenshiV
https://twitter.com/washingtonpost/status/951486709707">8241">https://twitter.com/washingtonpost/status/951486709707018241 and https://twitter.com/washingtonpost/status/984063009986433024
Musklim
*Advertisement*
GenshiV
Appears to be real.
DarkZalgo
I highly doubt it was "without parental knowledge". Washington Post app is $10/month.
GenshiV
I think you vastly overestimate how carefully the upper class go over their credit card bills & Liam Stack looks distinctly upper class...
Fyba
I'm not saying I believe the story, but my sister (7yo) almost got away with paying for around $100 in rentals over 3 months.
Fyba
She watched us put in the password for age-restricted material which is the same password for buying things on the fire stick.
nopost
Some of the people in these comments never read at or above their grade level and it shows. Besides, newspapers are written at ~11yo English
maggin
But she started 9yo.
jade2562
Some of the people in these comments never read at or above their grade level and it shows.
superseanicboom
We legit have people saying that 3 year olds can't talk and I... don't know what the fuck is going on anymore.
Brutsarge
What is the reading level of the Washington Post? My understanding is NYT is 12th grade
superseanicboom
Who gives a fuck about reading level? You understand every word you read when you were just starting out? No, because you were learning. Fuc
Brutsarge
Response to no post . Calm down. What’s go you so triggered
TatersWhatsTatersPrecious
Tell her to work for Fox News instead, no journalism degree required.
Brutsarge
And reading is optional too
misspostmarked
Lol at the downvotes on this
ITryToOnlyRespondInGifs
I see the 10 Fox News enthusiasts have checked in for this one
Cheeseme
I have a student who will go, in depth, into paleontology. He was 7. This is possible.
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
7-year olds are pretty obsessive.
LordofGoats
I consider that normal, because that's the type of 7-year-old I was. Still know more about dinosaurs than I probably should as an adult...
misspostmarked
what a nerd
EndersdoyouthinkthisisafuckingGame
This was me as a kid. Jurassic Park blew my little mind sky-high!
tiananmensquare1989
thank god she didnt "somehow download" Pornhub
nateglen350
And you know she hasn’t?
SavagePatchKids
It'd be a little weirder if pornhub invited an 11 year old girl for the day, too.
PistolPeat
Or Fox news
GoblinOfPoliticalSuccubus
And want to be a web developer for a porn site
secretoaster
But that story is all made up and she DID download pornhub
Poppthe1th
When that is yet to be confirmed
ourari
Yeah, we don't want her to aspire to work Washington's post.
alittletime
Buzzfeed*
IOnlyPostThatOneGorillaGif
BarakEarlofTrellheim
PommedeTerreur
Hot damn, buddy. That was quite a zinger.
ourari
TheNerdFonz
@pornhub has an APP?!?!
MistressPippa
They have a Discord server too.
claustrofobicjack
What? U got a Link?
SmashingBrickCastration
It's online not in the app store. But it works the same
FullMetalJackass
“...it comes in pints!?!”
FiftyShadesOfMascarpone
Every website has one these days.How else would they harvest your data & bug you with targeted ads in the age of secure browsers w.ad block?
Ketheres
Yup. It works pretty great too.
BeesechurgerProductions
You get it from their site directly
Markamanic
Go to their site on any mobile device and you can download it there.
TheNerdFonz
Where? I checked and didn’t see it
Markamanic
Open the side menu (3 horizontal bars in the top left) it's then at the top of the pop out menu ( at least in the Netherlands)
Markamanic
Just a note, you need to have the option to install apps from unknown sources on. Not sure where that is but Google is your friend.
anon311919
Yes is the short answer
TheNerdFonz
Tell me how! I can’t find how to download it. I found something for older iPhones. Nothing for the new stuff
BeesechurgerProductions
You get it from their site directly
TheNerdFonz
Yep tried that. No avail.
OriginalNameDoNotSteal
Yeeeeeessssssss is the long answer
anon311919
I was hoping someone would set me up for that punchline lmao
[deleted]
[deleted]
Iamnotacreativeman
He he, short
awesmond
Can I hear the long answer?
anon311919
Yeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssssssssssss
BeesechurgerProductions
You get it from their site directly
PocketVist
IMHO journalism lost the integrity. I want a objective of what have happend. But i need to look at several news site or even core material..
VinchVolt
It's telling about the state of modern journalism that the Washington Post is owned by Jeff Bezos.
VinchVolt
Mainstream news outlets became corporate-owned tabloids, and self-professed "alternative journalists" are typically Alex Jones-type nuts.
notreallythatunpopularopinionrabbit
You've really got to dig for non-sensationalist stories. They're there, but I agree - most of it is shit. Especially science reporting.
AnAccountToPostThis
What? You dont want to read about a totally real and 100% proven cancer cure for the 8th time this year? Oh wait nvm it was nothing.
allcattywampus
I know journalists. They're smart and skeptical and conscientious, well-trained in the discipline and ethics of their profession.
superseanicboom
But if we write off all journalists as dishonest hacks, it makes it easier to ignore news we don't like. Get with it.
PocketVist
Well i do not, i just believe the credibility have dropped. Emphazing emotions, being plain wrong, and then hiding the apology.
PocketVist
To form an opinion about what have happend. But now its all about "sides blaming the other". Its fucking disgusting, i want the...
PocketVist
Raw information, what is being said and as a fucking after thought "professional opinion". But now its opinion then fact.
RadicalLeftist
Australias ABC, England's BBC are both incredible news sources.
Mercurybird
I don’t even need their opinion TBH but yes, gimme the raw news first. +1 on all you’ve said here.
DamnedAustin
How much do you pay for your news sources?
PocketVist
Well before i had a subscription based, that only covered the local, the overall used is either payed with cold hard cash
PocketVist
Or Ada on the news website, but also youtube newssite like philip defranco that covers bort side, hbo last week tonight, Netflix patriot act
robthelob20
EmCeeMiNacion
I don’t believe he said that. But I do believe a 3yr old is smarter than her.
MaraSovsFeet
Honestly that's exactly the kind of fake deep high bullshit toddlers say all the time so I believe that one
YouL0stTheGame
Whenever I read this I always chuckle because she basically said she’s dumber than a 3 year old
SuperDuperSkateTeam
She said it
lemonsherbet
About 1/3 of my brain cringes when I read that
StormBurnX
FWIW that's a parody account that almost exclusively tweets silly "my kid said" tweets.
DrunkSideOfTheMoon
Didn’t someone update her Wikipedia page to call her a liar?
comfortablerebel
I thought someone did but I can't find it on Wikipedia
nakashima97
Ha! Good reference.. I read a lot as a kid because my family was super Catholic & didn’t let me leave the house. Kids use books as an escape
noxus200
3 is a weird name for your son
postman69
Books die when forgotten. There are tons of books that were lost long ago and we know nothing about. Like in Baghdad or Alexandria libraries
FallingStar7669
"my mom's son." - my mom's son.
isaypoopythingabecausemostofyouannoyme
“I’ve discovered the cure for cancer”. My son.. who is still a seed in my nutsack.. that’s how smart he is..
acinonyxjubatus
You might want to go get checked by the doctor if there’s talk of cancer in your nutsack.
yesyoucancancan
My son has said that and he's 7. He hasn't actually found it, but he has said that.
TheRealGeorgeMcfly
The cure for cancer is made of Legos.
CumsInPies
Well I said that back in '92 but nobody listened. Who's laughing now? Not you Julia no you went through chemo and died, dumbass.
assmaster4000
Bruh!
BeanMugged
Shame he's been flushed by now...
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
Meh. Rebecca Hazelton is a poet, and I 100% believe that kinda meaningless babble is the kind of thing a poet's kid could say.
robthelob20
Definitely, but not at age 3. Cognitively, a three year old just hasn't developed enough to form and convey a thought like that
allmostthere1234
Actually we are highly intelligent at this age and I for one have an outstanding credit score of 980. - I'm 3
allmostthere1234
I accidentally downloaded Imgur when I was 1. Also invested in the stock market so I can retire at 8yrs old.
beneaththeradar
Tell that to Saint Alia of the Knife, heretic.
MechaNinja
I'm sure you can teach a kid to read by 3 if you want, and I'm pretty sure they get object permanence by then, but death seems a stretch.
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
Depends. You always have the kids who have had a relative die or are exposed to more violent media by older siblings or irresponsible adults
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
though I will agree the kind of existential musings of the original image are likely just parroting what adults talk about.
notreallythatunpopularopinionrabbit
They know death is a thing, but not really what it is. Even my 6yr old struggles with the concept and they've gone to funerals
MarkOfTheCovenant
You're absolutely certain about that?
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
I have three kids and two of them were using equivalent sentence structure as the image by the time they were 3. They were also big on
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
running through the house with socks on and it took an incredible amount of time for them to figure out why they were slipping/falling, but.
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
Their ability to parrot some profound-sounding nonsense doesn't require them to craft and understand it. Kids say weird shit.
thewhiskeyrunner
Nephew is five, I told him the grass on the side of the road was bigger than him. He retorted with "Auntie, the universe is bigger than you"
SpitMatt
1) Still doesn't make sense though. Kids below 10 don't have the mental development to form complex sentences and ideas like that. Even if
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
That's untrue. Complex sentences are possible depending on what kind of speech is modeled.
SpitMatt
2) they parroted the words, they won't understand them and would have probably asked their parents about it as their default action.
TonyBeck
That’s a very peculiar claim to make as is it demonstrably untrue. Seeing as we’re citing relevant credentials I took basic developmental 1/
MattHolmberg
Wow the comments. Salt mine down here.
MrBEC
LET_IT_RAIN.jpeg
joeyecho101
A lot of imgurians just hate kids and are unwilling to think or say anything positive about them. Fucking gross, man.
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
I'm having an argument in another post right now where someone is claiming there's "no way" a kid under 10 could use a compound sentence.
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
My 9 year-old has a better vocabulary and better grammar than most of the people I work with, when he's not making up words.
MattHolmberg
That’s pretty sad. It’s like, just cuz your kid needs a helmet to eat lunch, doesn’t mean they all do.
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
Savage, but yeah.
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
I'm starting to think that people are underestimating others simply because they weren't at that level at the referenced ages.
RumbleNtheJungle
have really no concept of how old I was when I learned things. I remember practicing writing letters than essays. Everything betweens a blur
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
*it's the same post. It's this post.
Clopz89
Nice “where are my glasses” moment budy
TheOnlyPtylerdactyl
Yeah...
Gayforbae
I mean, to be fair, most of the assholes on here cant either.
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
Hey! I resemble that remark.
maskdmunky
I used to teach Latin to 6-13 year olds who understood verb conjugations, tenses, moods, you name it. My first paper at age 8 was -
maskdmunky
- marked down because “my thesis wasn’t clear enough.” Which was a concept I understood. At age 8. Kids just need a good education.
DrDoALittleMoreThanBareMinimum
How young do you guys think 9 year olds are? We onlt had one english book in the house when i was 9 it was an encyclopedia thats all i read
Jess1988NY
I started reading my fathers NY Times at 10, read the main and all the op-eds, as best I could. Made me a very advanced reader in school
Jaymezians
I started reading the Eragon Series at nine. I wasn't even a smart kid either.
PurplePenguin87
I taught myself to sign the letters of the alphabet when I was 6 because I was bored and going through the encyclopedia
jamadrien
Onlt
Typohime
Every 9 year old is a different maturity level.
killerjerick
Damn, when I was 9 I was 2 years into Runescape consuming my life.
jevans88
This was my best friend. We both flew through “chapter” books like crazy but she also read her entire World Encyclopedia set a few times
gkyhn
9? Am I close?
DysgraphicProgrammer
9 year olds are smart. You can have a conversation with them. They often have thoughtful original opinions.
planetfinder
I read atlases and encyclopedias from the time I was 5. Who do you think this kid is? You?
chefryank
I was read tom Clancy and john Grisham novels at 9. It is just whatever will capture your attention
yamiseirei
I was lucky, dad was an avid book collector and had about 3000 books so i got my pick of all sorts.
McFuu
I read a ton until about 14, and still read a lot from that point, just not as prolific. My mom hated the scholastic fairs, I wanted it all
ioncewasafraidiwaspetrified
"Back in MY day..."
defaulted
I happened to learn at a young age my birthday is a significant day in history from reading an encyclopedia!
Paksennarionisabadass
I used to read Time Magazine cover to cover. Some people could stand to have less crappy TV in their kids lives, I bet
LiteralVampirePotBellyGoblins
I got into my dad's Arthur C Doyle collection around that age. Been a Sherlock fan since.
Byrhtnoth
When I was 10 I had read all of LOTR. Sometimes kids just like to read.
Travellightly85
I feel you. I had the whole encyclopedia Britannica. I skimmed most of it, but topics I found interesting I read. Guess the 9 yearold does 2
MILFhuntersAssociate
Similar situation, I read a dictionary for fun. I’m great at spelling but I’m still kind of an idiot
AsFarAsIKnow
Yeah, I was at university reading level by 9. I honestly thing the stress of having to figure out other people during teenagerhood sets us 1
AsFarAsIKnow
all back by a lot. 2
angrytaco
I had a graphical picture book explaining airplanes and satellites. I'm an engineer now :). I loved that book so much
Oscill8s
I started programming when I was 7 years old, on my commodore 64. Good times.
[deleted]
[deleted]
Oscill8s
I miss my old c64; lost it in a move. :c Emulation just isn't the same.
yamiseirei
ZX Spectrum basic programs were really fun in 1980 i was 6 lol
notreallythatunpopularopinionrabbit
I was fully aware of the impact and significance of the Berlin Wall coming down at 10, and watched Challenger explode on live TV at 7.
yamiseirei
I remember watching footage of chernobyl as well but yeah i temember challenger really well and the shock when it exploded.
notreallythatunpopularopinionrabbit
I was also the kind of nerd who watched Regan and Gorbachev navigate the cold war. Many 9yr olds are far from clueless
bs13690
Didn't most kids of our generation watch it live since most schools had it on because of the teacher on the shuttle?
razark
Most, but my school didn't. One of the astronauts had a daughter at the school, even.
iamnotfunatparties
"How young do you guys think 9 year olds are?" I might be wrong, but I'd guess they are about 9 years young?
AdmJota
Which means that even if they didn't start reading until they were six, they've still been reading for three years already.
bs13690
Thanks, Captain Literal.
iamnotfunatparties
Well, I must admit that I am not fun at parties.
Jaymezians
Bitch please, by the time I was nine I was nearly twelve years old.
Blud4BludGod
I spent the better part of a decade working instead of sleeping. I picked up an extra couple years of awake time in there, so I feel that
drewcrosby
Speak for yourself. I was about 6 when I was 9 years old.
DrDoALittleMoreThanBareMinimum
For nearly a year till we moved to the uk and i got fiction books. The encyclopedia peaked my interest in biology and now im a junior doctor
Magnum3point141592654
*piqued your interest
Dpunch4
I love grammar Nazi's. They've been helping me write better English since I was 11.
PositivelyKAH
Old 11 or young 11?
JamesJabberwocky
*Nazis. The plural does not need nor warrant an apostrophe. The way you've used it is possessive as in the Nazi's horrible crimes.
keyholes
Sorry, but a combination of possessive and plural would actually make it, the Nazis' horrible crimes.
Eyesotope
Write *gooder* english.
DrDoALittleMoreThanBareMinimum
I should have invested in a dictionary as well i guess??
o4kill
I just realized I love your username. Hats off to you fellow nerd
Eyesotope
*pico de gallo*
LiteralVampirePotBellyGoblins
On the side, please.
ValhallaIAmComing
It was an encyclopaedia not a dictionary.
Magnum3point141592654
I read the entire 1983 World Book Encyclopedia set when I was in third grade. To include the dictionary it came with. So, there's that.
ForkOffPlease
nygreenguy
Most underated comment. And that spelling is weird.
DrDoALittleMoreThanBareMinimum
UserSubHunterOfIndeterminateGender
I started reading my grandfather's New York Times at that age. I still get their Sunday crossword and can sometimes actually finish it.
Brutsarge
I can get thru mon-wed. Falls to pieces after that
IWantToMakeCrazyScienceWithYou
Same
HighFlyKai
What? I don’t understand
Brutsarge
Regarding the crossword
drpepper42
Crossword increases in difficulty throughout the week
YurgenGrimwood
Interesting how the "don't believe everything on the internet" has turned into "a 9 year old liking to read the paper is impossible".
Woestkonijn
I read the paper when I was 3. My mom was doing my toddler homework while I asked her what I meant that the dollar was low. Kids sometimes1/
Woestkonijn
Really say and do the darnest things. I still have the newspaper scrap from that paper. And I still don't really know what I means 2/
Woestkonijn
When the dollar is low.
superseanicboom
"It's impossible because I'm a dumbass and therefore everyone else probably is too" basically
FiftyShadesOfMascarpone
I bugged my sisters to teach me the letters in the newspaper at age 5. Not b/c I was interested in the news, I just wanted to read & write.
FiftyShadesOfMascarpone
At 6, I wrote a sci-fi story complete w. illustrations inspired by Captain Future cartoons.Can confirm that kids definitely do these things
Ayoken007
I truly believe that some people are on a race to the bottom to be the most jaded, over it/heard it all before people on the internet.
Ayoken007
Those types would rather believe everything is a lie than potentially feel like they got tricked believing something is true on the internet
HighFlyKai
That’s exactly why many do it
DarkZalgo
It's not that part that's TOO astonishing. It's that I doubt a 9 year old purchased a monthly subscription without parental knowledge.
Kodaxmax
also out of all the things to buy, why a shitty newspaper
halcat
It says she downloaded the app. That may only offer free articles, or may take advantage of an existing subscription.
AdmJota
Where does it say anything about a subscription? Why would they charge a subscription for stories you can read for free on the web?
notreallythatunpopularopinionrabbit
I wouldn't notice a kids sub to WaPo renewing, I would just assume it was mine until I noticed duplicates it doing a subscription audit.
antman2988
Umm have you not heard of the kids who spend 100s on Fortnite without their parents knowing right away?
Gababu
but this happened for 2 years though.
antman2988
Did credit cards not exist two years ago?
DamnedAustin
It happens. Lost people don't scan their itemized statements. Some because they dont know any better, others because they just dont need to.
SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE
Isn't it free on Kindle?
DamnedAustin
Could be!
DarkZalgo
So now we're saying some 9 year old kid stole her parents credit card without them knowing and purchased a Washington Post subscription?
notreallythatunpopularopinionrabbit
You don't need a credit card for an app purchase most of the time, all you need is a password. Credit card is stored.
DarkZalgo
That would still require a credit card being used at some point on the device. What would a parent purchase on a child's device?
6313326
If the phone's not locked down, you can pay with Google Pay or hit the "Pay with Amazon" button. Easy, especially if passwords autofill.
DarkZalgo
As someone entering the cybersecurity field it's scary that people would ever use a password or credit card autofill.
DamnedAustin
What? No. What apps are you using that need your card info? Google Play Store does that part.
trondason1
I mean... lots of kids do that with in-game purchases on mobile games. There's been a lot of scandals.
DarkZalgo
That's supposed to be MORE believable?
Sawrock
If the card is just set up on autopay, maybe. In any case, I'm not too worried about the implications myself. S'not my card.
ichangedmynamejustnow
Or that perhaps the information was saved on the device and it only took clicking confirm to purchase it. Doubt it happened though
Nefel
Yeah. Kids using parents credit cards without permission is pretty popular. One of the reasons games with microtransactions so dangerous.