Porecomesis
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Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aWl7kQZHZE0
Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aWl7kQZHZE0
Football247365abc
This. Is. Gold!
tesseract4d2
Anyone think I could claim political asylum to get the fuck of the US to basically any country with socialized Healthcare? I know Canada
tesseract4d2
Doesn't like us immigrants, but this is pretty fucking serious now. I'll quarantine for as long as you want...
BillieJoeLondon
As a Brit, sentient ham is oh so painfully accurate
faintrush585
The final warning cry of our collapsing society. We need to unfuck our selves...
ShouldersDeepInAHorse
No it's fucking not -_- It'd take a fuckton more to collapse society as a whole, this virus sucks ass, but it's not the end of civilization.
TongueTiedLabourerfromtheLandoftheLittlePeople
The worse the recession the better it is for climate change.
ShouldersDeepInAHorse
The worse for the people losing their homes and potentially starving.
WhaaatDa
Goodness! Had I known at the start there was a YouTube link...!
VodkaReindeer
VodkaReindeer
I mean that there is no profit motive in waiting before dealing with it. It's just stupidity, not maliciousness.
VesselOfHate
I am SHOCKED this isn't a collection of quarter second gifs. Thank fucking God.
lenomdeplume
User name checks out.
DiesOnLoadingScreen
They make a PG version so it can be shown in schools
Playmaker101
TrapsAreIllegal
64 images? Post one and just link the video you fucking dingus.
SmokyDoggg
londonosierra2000
For optimistic patriotic fantasies tune in to FOX. There you'll be told we're #1 and doing great. No need for distopian reality.
DesolateMirror
Shh take your Soma
kroks
LadyLatte
DaveMeowthewz
Ok, fuckchop is my new favorite word.
silveryblue
me too
DiesOnLoadingScreen
First time i heard Shitfuckery from them I've been using it. Best word to use these days.
Feralkyn
Hold tf up:
this isn't true. Other countries sent supplies and Germany even took in Italian patients.
NationofSchrad
"I take no responsibility."
Neoeon
Faaantastic. Of course it's much better if everyone just ignores this entire silly little trifle and go back to their sex, beer, and cats.
Porecomesis
Sadly, we can't. We can't just pretend nothing's wrong while pandemics wreak havoc and climate change crawls upon us.
Lissyb
I am sorry to inform you but that is exactly what humanity is going to do, in spite of everything you just said.
Neoeon
Oooh, sure you can! Just try harder as people die and the world burns. You NEED that newest gadget from a country dumping pollution.
jimmyhowlett
In case you also needed to google it, neoliberalism - a modified form of liberalism tending to favor free-market capitalism.
dataengineer
the thing about dystopian and reality is about one disease. Oh..... wait.... is this one it?
YeOlRazzleDazzle
I don't think most Americans are aware that the term 'Liberal' is used very differently everywhere else.
PanNonOpticon
It's funny when American conservatives use liberalism as a curse word.
DarkwingDuc
Neoliberalism is essentially Reagan-era conservatism: https://www.investopedia.com/terms/n/neoliberalism.asp
TongueTiedLabourerfromtheLandoftheLittlePeople
All those silly people who think rich guys care about small towns.
WhatsYourCovidStory
.
TheHillsHaveNostrils
I think you may have to sharpen those words a bit. IMO it's a form of liberalism preaching free market as gospel and favouring companies
TheHillsHaveNostrils
over government (even over democracy, see 'vote with your wallet' apologists), and being anti-regulation everywhere.
leodavinci1
Regulation isn't needed everywhere.
obnoshus
Jesus, thats just a conservative guys? Is nobody else bothered by the global unification connotations in this video? advocating border loss?
Fastjack2056
Pretty sure the only thing about borders in there is that climate change is a global crisis no matter what country you are in.
AceOfShovels
No, because unifying the world would be an enormous step forward for humanity.
Fastjack2056
That's the game - a Neoliberal serves the same corporate bosses as the Conservative, but via the Democratic party, so you have a "choice".
WarlockWithNoPatron
Nathanyel
In that moment, he almost realized what a shitstain he was. Then he farted and his IQ again dropped to single digits.
obnoshus
nah im out i cant back to lurking. Its fortunate none of you have actual influence. Socrates was right, you people couldn't handle democracy
WarmCigarette
literal pandemic and looming climate crisis and your biggest worry is that there might not be a line you can't go through without a paper
DeadlyFood
*gets one fairly rational response* "I'm out, you shouldn't be allowed to vote because you disagree with me, some long dead bitch said so"
Phimukhi
I lost it at Il Douche.
Chainhealer
Il Duce is Italian for Leader, it was was Mussolini was called.
TheHillsHaveNostrils
Duke is the English cognate - both derive from Latin's 'dux' for 'leader'.
funkylittlebeat
"A government big enough to give you everything you want is a government big enough to take from you everything you have." (G. Ford)
Eikre
Yeah, so is a government with a whole fucking pile of nukes, Jerry.
Penthesilean
This is such childlike horse-shit “logic”. How are non-government capitalist solutions to needs like healthcare working out right now?
funkylittlebeat
Rather, ask why the gov't fails to protect us. After the swine flu, Obama was advised to stockpile masks, but he chose not to .
WarmCigarette
Because the DNC is run by capitalist neoliberal shills who make their career being 1% better than republicans
Penthesilean
This country is too stupid and delusional to ever go leftist.
FEMAcampsarereal
There you go, he turned it around to Obama.
TongueTiedLabourerfromtheLandoftheLittlePeople
What is a business but a small, very autocratic government?
WarmCigarette
Businesses and governments have two, often mutually exclusive goals. Profit for ownership vs improved wellbeing for constituents
funkylittlebeat
Government's essence is coercion. Business's essence is profit. Both finance social projects to polish their image, but it's only PR.
WarmCigarette
What? wtf is "essence"? Governments aren't built to coerce, they're built to agree u daft fuck
funkylittlebeat
My poli-sci prof called it the "Peter Pan theory of good gov't" (gov't is only wonderful if people would believe in its magical power).
TongueTiedLabourerfromtheLandoftheLittlePeople
Genuinely *Democratic* governments favour the well being of their constituents.
WarmCigarette
Yeah sure ok
andremauriceaudet7
America is definitely not the worst, but besides that pretty good ad.
GondwanaCraton
Um, what? A black man is president, and conspiracy theories about FEMA stockpiling body bags spawn.
GondwanaCraton
The orange fool is president: Actual mass graves.
illegalacorn
But we are?
sorosfieldops
You are the best.
sorosfieldops
at dying of corona.
PancakeLegend
I mean, you do have 1/3 of the worlds total infected. So there's that.
andremauriceaudet7
Sure we do. And china doesnt have any deaths right? And every death recorded as by Corona is by corona right?
Svereki
At this point CoronaVirus is causing complications with most hospitalizations that we would otherwise have care for. So even if wasn't direc
andremauriceaudet7
Theres also an incentive for people to write every death as a case of COVID-19
Svereki
what do you mean? How could someone profit by counting more cases to covid?
quantumphear
Wealthiest, most power nation on earth can't get its shit together. USA is definitely being judged for not meeting the high standards /1
quantumphear
it should be able to easily surpass. What a shitshow.
andremauriceaudet7
We are 1st, not the wealthiest. 2nd, never built to be this powerful. Were trying to compete as an authority when we were built as a bit
andremauriceaudet7
More put together than a Confederate.
idontevenknowwhoiamanymore
I’m confused, capitalism bad, communism bad, government bad,need government to act for climate change. Democracy bad. Do we all move to NZ?
yamatto
there's also the point that nz only just got rid of our neoliberal shitgoblin in time to not be left to die. nowhere is perfect.
Tesseract09
Countries run to enrich leaders bad, countries run to enrich and protect people good.
leodavinci1
Which would be what countries exactly?
Tesseract09
At the moment the good ones would be the countries that took swift national actions to protect their citizens.
TongueTiedLabourerfromtheLandoftheLittlePeople
China is run by a bunch of racist old men who only care about holding onto power and making money. Hmm, sounds familiar.
GondwanaCraton
"Do we all move to NZ?" Unfortunately, she is not single. Or I'd be filling out the paperwork right now.
wanderingTravaler
It’s satire meant to question if governments still serve their people’s well-being and interests. America’s founding fathers would approve
user82650
It's satire meant to make people feel smug and superior for "noticing" problems that literally every smart person has known for centuries.
Green223
I don't know, I don't feel very smug and superior. I mostly feel terror.
ImSorryFriend
What purpose does it serve to try to shame people for talking about them, besides stunting positive change?
Neoeon
...Sigh...No, no, and no, it's about how HUMAN BEINGS with POWER THEY SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN GIVEN being CUNTS.
user82650
Oh good then, we'll have an anarchist society, that will work.
Neoeon
Really? So we put the right people who actually know what they're doing in charge by voting in fair elections and this is anarchy?
leodavinci1
How do you determine who they are?
Neoeon
Prior history would be a good start. Stated opinions a good second. Ongoing behaviour an excellent third.
Porecomesis
Assholism aligns with no political ideologies.
ShouldersDeepInAHorse
Capitalism: When handled by people who know other humans exist: good. When handled by shitfaced alienating cunthats: bad.
Neoeon
Exactly. That's what people fail to understand: restraint. It's not a either/or concept but one that has limits just like anything.
ShouldersDeepInAHorse
It's the same reason there's an earlier post with SO much shit-talking about centrists, some people can't grasp a nuanced concept.
WarmCigarette
If your operating philosophy is reliant on constant regulatory restraint to not turn society into an apocalyptic hellscape, maybe it's bad
Neoeon
If your diet plan is reliant on moderation and self-discipline to avoid turning into a giant fat person, maybe it's bad.
ShouldersDeepInAHorse
By that logic you shouldn't have a government at all, cuz you need to constantly regulate it so it doesn't get too powerful.
WarmCigarette
??? Governments enact their own limitations and we rely on the 4th estate (press) to know when they're broken, so we can vote them out.
luvendr
For the last time pls just share the video, thank you.
TheHillsHaveNostrils
I think this is arrangement is to benefit those who have to pay for bandwith by the bit. In that case this solution is much, much cheaper.
TheHillsHaveNostrils
*bandwidth
Cilvaa
TheHillsHaveNostrils
That's interesting. Can you tell me what the size of the file would be if you streamed it on automatic instead?
luvendr
Ahh okay, the whole thing makes sense now. I was curious why....thanks ?
volkspider
“Making the WHO our bitch” — they superimposed the yen (¥) symbol, which is Japan’s currency. China uses renminbi/yuan.
Alfadorfox
I thought that looked wrong! Wasn't certain tho.
Green223
It's not wrong though. They use 元 and ¥. ¥ is more commonly used as a monetary symbol. 元 is more formal.
Alfadorfox
Thanks! Today I learned.
TheHillsHaveNostrils
There are two symbols in use for the renminbi/yuan. One is 元, the other is ¥. For (Japanese) yen ¥ and 円 are used.
Green223
The renminbi/yuan symbol is the same symbol.
volkspider
No, it’s not. The symbol for yuan is 元.
TheHillsHaveNostrils
Both are used, see first paragraph: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Renminbi
Green223
That's more formal but ¥ is more commonly used as the monetary symbol.
Govote
You can check your voter registration at vote.org
kevinallover
You can buy a guillotine on the dark web
Crazywelderguy
or make one after a *social distanced* visit to The Home Depot
SureGoAheadAsshole
How bout non-US voteurs?
Wynterwitch
Put your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye.
Chainhealer
They don't have to register because their country knows who is eligible to vote.
woodchucc3211
I really don’t see how this is political, stop making it out as such please.
Govote
How the fuck is this *not* political?
woodchucc3211
How is it political? You’d really reports from various countries so that makes it political? Some of the countries mentioned don’t vote FYI
Govote
This comment is a mess. Here's a simpler message: you can check your voter registration at vote.org
woodchucc3211
So only the USA? How many countries are listed in the post? You post like a bot but apparently have a brain, astounding
Govote
Still waiting
woodchucc3211
Oh I’m so sorry to keep you waiting, how dare I let your idiocy fester any longer than it already has.
Govote
He's getting mad! Let's make him sad, check your voter registration at vote.org!
Porecomesis
Source, in case it didn't show up in the post: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aWl7kQZHZE0
jherazob
Thanks for providing a source
ProphetofEntropy
The Machine you say? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=paG1-lPtIXA
Porfirij
"this sentient ham caught the virus and almost died of irony" - holy mother of destruction!
TinaEveFox
I haven't laughed that hard in months, totally freaked the dog out.
QueenVelvetRed
I am definitely using this instead of BoJo now. Sentient ham. Perfection.
hismarcmaterials
I remember Charlie Brooker describing David Cameron as "c3p0 covered in ham". What is it about Tories and being made of cold pig?
stouffer
Makes a change from fucking them during morning break at Eton.
QueenVelvetRed
Maybe they pick up piggy dna during these "rituals" ?
philstrum
US with highest cases of all where the curve is hardly flattening are not renewing restriction laws. Predictions anyone.?
sadurdaynight
Rift in system widens. Those that can afford to isolate survive. Thise that cant are sacrificed. People will justify it as herd immunity.
TheWorstWeasley
Reminder to come back in 6 months to check which predictions came true
PosthumousExile
Thinking about taking out all my savings and moving to new Zealand
sauronater
Good luck getting citizenship there..
nachosamurai
Alot of people will die quickly and then things will go back to status quo
leodavinci1
Neither of those will happen. People won't die quickly and the status quo won't return for years.
GalaxyTheWolf
I was called back to work just to sit on my phone so the company can get free grant money... Yeah we're fucked.
Cultistchan
1 million dead, and start of a new american civil war, that way I'll win my apocalypses bingo
IgnoreMeImProbablyDrunk
TheSSMorgan2015
sauronater
The darkest timeline :o
Fluckers
Suddenly we will ride all shiny and chrome.
TeddyMoment
BruceValanchesSecondChin
Total Fucking Panic, Dead People, and Bullshit Part 2: Electric Boogaloo
XEndeadX
We have had no cases at all so we were going to only slightly loosen restrictions, but someone sued so now we are dropping them entirely.
XEndeadX
We may as well be starting fresh. This is a college town it *will* be brought here and we have built 0 immunity. This will be *fun*.
AWanderingMage
Millions infected, hundreds of thousands or worse, millions dead, and our economy devastated for decades due to loss of millions of people.
DaddySharkDoDoDoDoDoDo
Probably will look like Sweden and Denmark, twice as many deaths but a quicker path to immunity. US should have closed borders in February.
mimomisu
Denmark closed down pretty soon
DaddySharkDoDoDoDoDoDo
I’m a dumb American. I think I meant Norway. I get those countries confused.
mimomisu
I think all the surrounding countries closed down quickly, I know about Denmark because I was working with a company from there at the time.
leodavinci1
Dead people don't have immunity.
DaddySharkDoDoDoDoDoDo
Technically they’re immune to life
VultureTX
manufactured hysteria in the Media? 'Cause they originally said 2.5mil dead in US alone out of models with no facts. familiar?
DevCatOTA
Maybe because the media made their prediction based upon the average American's ability to follow instructions before
DevCatOTA
the "oh shit" realization arrives? The "oh shit" realization just came earlier to enough to throw off the calculation.
sadurdaynight
2.2M based on little info about virus (bc its new) and if nothing was done. Models change as research is done.
VultureTX
The Cfr is off by a factor of 10 as we test for antibodies in the community. WAGs are not models to keep adding data refinements.
BelarusianPotatoFarmer
Many people who aren't smart enough to listen to experts won't have to worry about it for much longer.
leodavinci1
If Covid only killed stupid people, you'd have point there.
caine224
Because they will all have starved to death while locked in their homes?
leodavinci1
Where's that happening in the U.S.? Right... nowhere.
caine224
https://www.ft.com/content/e5061be6-2978-4c0b-aa68-f372a2526826 no where, yet. Soon
AlwaysDownvoteDots
Why would they starve? The smart ones stocked up when reports came out months ago...
caine224
The smart ones WITH MONEY. Kind of important distinction. If I have no money and the gov closed your job, then what?
ThisOneKid
Texas choose not to renew them. Luckily, here in San Antonio (remember the Alamo), our mayor chose to extend the stay home orders.
thesuperrippednobody
Really wish Houston would have done that
SpicyPeanuts27
No pickpocketing on the river walk for a little while longer. LoL
Chainhealer
I heard the mayor of Atlanta say that State precedes city. So how legit is that?
WhytWu1f
I know Texas is big, but it turns out Atlanta isn’t in that state.
Chainhealer
You don't say.... Are there states in which the state doesn't supercede cities then? Hm?
WhytWu1f
Why would differing state laws have anything to do with the location of Atlanta? You should try google if you’re honestly curious.
ThisOneKid
Here in Texas, the government has generally always given the cities a lot of power. Due to how large we are, it would be hard to force 1/2
ThisOneKid
2/2 the entire state to follow one order. Issues like the sanctuary cities ordeal early in this presidency, show that.
Bearst
I believe the overall Texas orders supersedes individual county orders. Meaning San Antonio cannot extend stay at home orders?
Bearst
Well, it can in a way, but it cannot be more restrictive than the overall state executive orders.
ThisOneKid
I don't have an answer for you. A news station here is interviewing the governor today and I'm sure they'll ask about that. I'll also 1/2
ThisOneKid
check out the mayor's update yesterday to see if he covers that concern and get back to you. 2/2
GotBannedForPostingAYoutubeLink
Do what Sweden does, just accept that some people will die. Their per capita deaths are 6.7 times higher than Finland.
khora
And a 10th of New York.
leodavinci1
So much for UHC.
GotBannedForPostingAYoutubeLink
It doesn't really matter if you're in capitalist hospital or a socialist hospital when you're drowning in dead lung tissue.
GlebReawer
You do realize Finland also has UHC, no? Didn't think so.
PancakeLegend
Without control of state lines, it only takes one state to keep reinfecting the rest. Good luck.
fatchicksneedluvintoo
As a Louisianan, it will be us that keeps infecting others! Ppl are not doing social distancing and our numbers still rising!! *Sigh*
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
You make it sound like we're a bunch of countries duct taped together into one large shit show.
thesuperrippednobody
Are you saying we’re not?
PancakeLegend
This sounds accurate.
Impossibrew
I don't see where the lie is in that.
woodchucc3211
The curve is flat bruh, hospitals are not even close to being overwhelmed and we’ve been testing like a mofo
WhytWu1f
Except it’s not, at least nationally. Maybe locally in some places, sure. But it’s still going up in others.
leodavinci1
Except for somewhat isolated areas, not in the U.S. Hard to test like a mofo when, even after all this time, there aren't enough tests.
woodchucc3211
We have a lot of test and have tested more than anyone, we are also increasing our testing everyday. Like a mofo if you look at the facts
SpaceGhostToast
I just want to add on to this. I tried to get tested yesterday without insurance. They wanted $209 for a swab. Statistics won't show that.
ILikeCuteGifsAndICannotLie
The curve is flat and hospitals not overrun BECAUSE of staying at home. How hard is this to understand?
massingberd
Really hard, because Sweden.
woodchucc3211
When does it end? The curve is flat so we continue to stay home indefinitely?? Sweden had it right
ILikeCuteGifsAndICannotLie
Let me know how it turns out for you. My state is staying home.
woodchucc3211
So is mine but I’m essential. I just hope my state stops intentionally infecting people in nursing homes
Feralkyn
Look at the state of Italian hospitals during the height of infection for why "ah fuck it let's just go business-as-usual" is a fucking
Feralkyn
retarded idea
NR97420
50% of Americans... "That's fake news!" or "That's racist!"
[deleted]
[deleted]
degenerator
Response: "No, you're fake!" or "No, you're racist!" There, that settles it.
mustbethedragon
Sigh.
RideTheStimutacs
You mean 1% people being loud on the internet vs 99% of people who say nothing and go about their lives?
Leeloothedog
the best part... the 50% think its the other 50%.
BelarusianPotatoFarmer
*46% of voting Americans in 2016. Hope springs eternal.
tantallous
the problem is it is a different 50% for each, which leads to nothing ever getting done
QuickLighting53
No where even close to 50% of Americans. It's just sadly close to 50% of those who actually vote
prepeymad
Precisely
Couple78653
An important distinction
ConfessionBare
What makes you believe that the 50% that didn't vote are somehow different, or even smarter, than the ones that did?
NeoSilence
Because the stats out there say if everyone able to vote did vote we wouldn't have the orange in command.
DiabeticDolphin
Yeah I dont vote. If I did, I would have voted Trump (fuck Clinton) and hated myself now for contributing to this
QuickLighting53
Serious question - why "fuck Clinton"? Do you believe the propoganda around her that she's a criminal? She wasn't perfect, but would 1/2..
QuickLighting53
Have kept Obama policies going, which were incredibly good for our economy and overall quality of life...
DiabeticDolphin
Hindsight is 2020
boiphamet
In that boat now.
Sm9yCg
Only those who vote count. Get that into your heads for fucks sake.
QuickLighting53
Uh... I vote. Who are you directing this at?
maxzero
Every American: "The problem with America isn't me, it's those other Americans!"
thesuperrippednobody
No True Scotsman
KleptoKea
Fuck this is it. Americans refuse to take responsibillity for their own country's situation. It's always someone else's fault.
BanderasForScale
We gotta be close to 3 months right
ZachariasWolfe
As a voting citizen, I do place blame on the 100 fucking million people that didn't vote in the last presidential election and still won't.
paradoxbound
I would never condemn anyone for refusing to support Clinton, Trump or Biden.
ZachariasWolfe
There's third parties. I know I know that's a wasted vote, right? No. When the over 100 million people don't vote, that's wasted votes.
KleptoKea
Yes but why haven't you mobilised mass petitions, calls for referendums, etc? Voting is bread and butter that even the laziest citizen 1/
KleptoKea
in my country will do. You guys in USA act like you deserve a medal for getting off your asses to do that much. 2/2
6313326
(honest ?) Do you have a parliamentary system? Many people in the US feel like their vote doesn't count b/c it's usu FPTP (& there4 2 party)
ZachariasWolfe
..how is wanting everyone to vote equivalent to thinking it deserves a medal?