Mindcrime
8320
351
6
Aug 2, 2026 9:11 PM
Mindcrime
8320
351
6
Frencheeseater
IDoNotWantAnAccount
He's gonna "retire in privacy, plz respect :-)" and maybe they'll finally report his death a month or two later.
ThatGuyFromJustSouthOfTheMiddleOfNowhere
I'm surprised there aren't Kalshi odds on him dying in the next week...just resignation before term end.
B3N15
I think he's still alive. By necessity, there would have to be A LOT of people involved in a coverup of a VERY public figure's death and there's no way you'd be able to keep it quiet for long and it would be pretty easy to uncovered pretty quick once the information is out.
Nukls
ThatGuyFromJustSouthOfTheMiddleOfNowhere
GeneralPrower
When Trump dies I want to see that meme modified to where the Reaper just punches out the glass and is like "FUCK THIS GAME, I'M DOING IT NOW"
AWarningToOthers
https://imgur.com/2JKtYBB
Iamtrebek
Corpsemaxxing
woozle
IBrowseOnMyThrone
https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1emJmMms1dnAxbnZ0emc3NjVibTg1b3hrd2pjMGxpdmxiaXFjY3pldSZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/XHeLeuirRbwptHhSWd/200w.webp
ThatGuyFromJustSouthOfTheMiddleOfNowhere
zooshooter
Your date of death is off there by about 45 days
Dyamonde
No, August 4th will be the 'official' date of death, cause that's the deadline for the special election. So at some point tjis week they can allow him to officially die.
Sylvetrix
Looks like a case of rigor tortoise
ClarkKentfield
But they will still say he is still around as they are doing a weekend at Bernie's thing
speedonthis
That was version 3?!
surroundedbytwits
How fitting is it that this will be the last weasely thing he does in a career full of self- centered destructive actions that have left his poor state a horrible mess. Although half of Kentucky would probably vote for his corpse.
duktayp
Damn☹️ do the police have any suspects?
AbsoluteKilljoy
A wabbit
Jerry7887
Some democrat!
GuitarBobMonterey
The Olympic pool-liner slicer Communist, probably.
azgrak1
He’s probably been dead for awhile. But don’t worry no one will be charged with failure to report a dead body. Or charged with collecting his paycheck etc,
GuysJustWannaFish
Probably gonna pin it on Fauchi
chansuke
Well, in my area what tends to get turtles is attempting to cross a roadway.
RElGNMAN
At first sight of this I thought today's the day!
DukeDarkwood
Apparently, tomorrow's the day. Who knew?
orp0piru
Give him an enema before unplugging
so you can bury him in a matchbox.
OobedoobScoobyDoobyBenubi
Using his corpse to screw over democracy one last time, Mitch would be smiling up from Hell
ThisGuyPostingThings
His first name is Addison? Is he named after Addison Rae?
madflenser
He's named after the disease, because he also causes Hypercortisolism in everyone around him.
ThatGuyFromJustSouthOfTheMiddleOfNowhere
Technically he'd be named after Addison Mitchell McConnell II
Cookiesnm1lk
"repubicans never die, they just go missing in action" god i can't believe i just said that.
DukeDarkwood
I'll allow it, if you tell me that misspelling is intentional.
FoamingToad
Pardon, but what misspelling are you talking about? I see three miscapitalisations (possibly four if you're a godbot) but I fail to see any misspellings.
DukeDarkwood
"repubicans" for republicans. I'm hoping it's an intentional insult. Because republicans.
sumthinsumthinsumthin
LIES! He looks fine!
SeasonedCitizen
He knocked up four nurses and the woman in the gift shop
Frencheeseater
Frencheeseater
lonelyrangerofthedreams
Told you he was fine, see? Maga grandpa on his phone
sumthinsumthinsumthin
Also, he is dancing to his famously favorite song! /s
FoxPesdassi
We downvote AI slop here . . . but sometimes we make exceptions.
Mindcrime
This is not A. I.
StevenAlleyn
So let me get this straight:
-Mitch McConnell, one of the most consequential politicians in US history, is somehow secretly dead
-Beshear is too meek to investigate personally by driving to the hospital
-If it somehow came out that he was dead, this same Gov. Beshear would undoubtedly pick a constitutional fight with a veto-proof majority by nominating a successor instead of calling a special election
-& cuz of this certainty, GOP are depriving themselves of a vote in the senate until january?
BenjyX55
Hint: being a governor doesn't mean you're allowed to go into a hospital and demand information about someone else's medical condition.
StevenAlleyn
I agree. My point is that he either is too meek to do something bold or he isn’t.
He won’t ignore the legislature to install a democrat for 5 months, especially when not acting at all deprives the GOP of a senate vote NOW for however long Mitch is incapacitated or until January if he’s dead or dies.
There’s very little upside for Dems to doing anything besides wait out the clock.
An appointment will immediately backfire and Thune won’t seat the Senator.
StevenAlleyn
A special election delivers a vote to the GOP senate quickly.
Waiting keeps the GOP *down* one vote for 5 months AND avoids a nasty constitutional fight Beshear doesn’t have the cards to fight
DorkJedi
Hint: being a governor doesn't mean you're allowed to go into a hospital and demand information about someone else's medical condition.
BenjyX55
I still don't understand what you mean about the reps denying themselves a vote. If Mitch is dead, they don't get that vote until January in any case unless they let the special election happen, in which case Massie might try to play spoiler. On Wednesday, that's no longer a concern and they can throw the corpse out on the sidewalk.
StevenAlleyn
What I mean is this:
The conspiracy says that McConnell is dead right now and the GOP is hiding it.
If it turns out he is and it gets out today and Beshear calls a special election today, Massie can try to run but the odds of a non-Republican winning Kentucky are basically 0.
So if McConnell is dead right now, the republicans have lost a vote in the senate. They either regain that vote very shortly if a special election is called, or they get it back in January.
StevenAlleyn
So why would they intentionally deny themselves a senate vote?
BenjyX55
First of all, the odds are not zero. The current governor is a Democrat.
Second, Massie wouldn't be running as a democratic candidate. He would be running as a recent Republican who might split the vote enough for a Dem to win.