Sep 28, 2015 11:52 PM
12954
8052
136
funny
dad
gindiesel
worst sword ever
Meerkatking1
When a fly lands, clap your hands about 2 inches above it and see what happens
TheLimpinBiscuit
[sees all the comments about a fly swatter] You mean this isn't a litter scoop?
PunchViolenceInTheFace
My dad nails flies with rubber bands, mid air even, tell your dad to get on my dad's level...scrub.
FocacciaIsLife
I like this game. My entry is "littler box scooper".
Sataina
I like using a fly zapper and hearing them die
BetaTester112
Blue waffle?
rghtwo
no no no, oh hell no
jmdinbtr
Who want's to google the blue waffle?
Grudgebearingmidget
You are a monster, and you should feel ashamed for this post.
Klingon00
The REAL hard mode: https://nypdecider.files.wordpress.com/2014/11/karate-kid-gif-1.gif
Caylin
That is master mode
Marioloko
dark souls mode
SolaireSB
\[T]'/
CallMeJerryBecauseIAmJerry
NG++
Pulleylube
somebody still using the broken straight sword hilt eh
Slightly upgraded. Ever so slightly... :)
famousbrowser
Ugh, I still remember first DS when I missed the sword pickup and had to beat first 4 enemies just with hilt. Took me 2 hours. It was great.
Claidecon
Plot twist, he uses it to spank OP's mom!
SpearSharp
Everything is a weapon if you know how to use it >:D
Teabagus
Hahahahahahahaha, if u could only see mine
KrakedUp
That thing has seen a lot of paddling.
Deadplaything
Laughed harder than I should of.
neen26
Butt scratcha?!
SlimIsntShady
Get your butt scratcha!
Butt scratcha!
Get yo but scratchas!
hwatL4bloopy
What is that cheater shit? Use your bare hands or a spoon. And hard mode is chopsticks. (I took martial arts as a child and asian)
pIanetarysociety
if that's hard mode, this is expert mode: http://imgur.com/AO5osM0
spinningiswinning
That title... that's what she said.
ShowMeBunnies
Am I the only one who flicks them to death?
ninmonkey
I at least buy coffee before flicking someone I just met.
JamEngulfer
You want real hard mode? Catch each fly in a glass and put them out.
elimasterofall
Are we supposed to know what that is?
spamfolder7777
flyswatter
AstralBeast808
Context: It's a flyswatter.
goodguyC
I just bought this bad boy: http://images.productwiki.com/upload/images/electric_fly_swatter-400-400.jpg It was a massacre!!!
those things are fun to convince your drunk friends to lick
Calm down there satan...
tresamber
the smell of burning flies though. *scarred for life*
Not gonna lie, there was definitely an odor....of victory over the vanquished!!
Whisperdeer3
So if he hits one is he the King Of Swat?
LvAllen
The Sultan of Swat. The King of Crash, man. More than a human, but less than a god. Like, Hercules or something.
JAFIOI
The Titan of Terror, The Colossus of Clout. The Great Bambino!
ImTheGoddamnBatwoman
As someone who was harshly disciplined as a kid, I did not see that as a flyswatter.
Jetg10
Maybe your parents saw you as a fly.
You got a flyswatter? I got a wooden spoon or a belt depending on if it was my mom or dad.
SaintMaceToTheFace
Are you me?
FluffyPinknMoist
Sheeet, I got beat with a doggin bat. It's made for horses.
CrowDeMorcerf
And how old are you now?
48, I'm old.
Naww, you're just experienced.
You know it. (Not really) Well some things, yeah.
WhimsicalCalamari
...flyswatter?
why did you idiots have to go and make this my sixth most-upvoted comment
bentee762
Yes
leftyshuckles
Dick tapper
DRStarsick
dildo
seeet
flyswaffles
IUpvoteEveryPostISee
Ass swatter
Detox208
It's called a blue waffle.. Trust me. Google it
MarvinOGravelBalloonFace
Flysniper.
TheBlackxRanger
yswatte
danny0762
Anythings a butt plug if you're brave enough
itsAone
kidswatter
Dreadends
Flies water
jammyjarman
Buttscratcher!
illwatchitburnwhileyougetmeadrink
Waffles
SquidJesus
No, now it's just a swatter.
sweater
RadishSaysHi
Advanced flyswatter
DownvoteMeMore
Ass-swatter
TyrdCrapply
After a couple of days at The Beer Store during bee season
PsuPepperoni
Don't kill bees man
Sorry, should have specified: yellow jackets. And they are assholes this time of year!
MY0BL1V10N
Tennis Racket
laacis2
whats left of it
thefurredreich
nuplsstahp
Ewww
ItsMaidMariansForestNow
Everything about me cringed and tightened.
UnhelpfulAnswers
Then you are ready..
eyeLied
that got me wet
Gallifreynian
....Kay.
UnspokenX
Try an electric fly swatter and call me.
SlobberToilet
Grill spatula when not swatting flies
lovemesomepoptarts
Watter
BenjaminFink
spatula mmmmmmm
Steakunit
I love spatulas so much I bought the company
Pontation
Spatula
DougDervidson
Butt-water
420B0ngRips4Jesus69
thisheretexasdude
splatula
Xorflank
How brave?
SherpaRage
"Ice water, flyswatter; gonna get you through the day."
TOTOAFRICA
butt scratcher!
ifyouarereadingthisbuymeataco
http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/family-guy-buttscratcher.gif
ThisMeansALot
BUTT SCRATCHER!!!!!
LadyYmir
Butt scratcher?
TheMexicanStaringFrog0fSouthernSriLanka
Buttscratcher :(
Snarknado
Butt scratchaaah!
realscrumpysteve
BUTT SCRATCHER!
TheOriginalJerk
Flyswatter
keanukin
MAYBE FLYSWATTER CAN BE OUR ALWAYS ??
MidgetGiraffe
ChineseTakeAway
Wysflatter
NipplesInAJar
Wise Flatter.
BottleofDjinn
Weiss Matter.
SheWhoImgurs
Can you please ask him to break off the two mini rows on the left side? That'd be great.
XMasnaX
Thank you for stating that... It's like people who leave the stickers on new items. Drives us OCD'ers bat shit crazy!
KuuroiYuki
*columns
Thanks! I didn't even notice my error.
Synsei
That would be cheating to the next level. Last top level is just a stick.
Koshunae
Hes using it to his advantage. More surface area to clip those smug flies. Yeah. I saw you try to land on my food. Smug bug-eyed assholes.
sm4rt4lex
Once you get one of those electric zapper ones the game changes entirely.
MoreDonutsPerDonut
I love mine, especially when the fly drops smoking and spinning on the floor
DuckTruck
The $2 ones from harbor freight use D cell batteries. Bug cease to exist after a hit from one of those
CindyWho4
I have one & kids. 1 night on Ambien wanted to know exactly what they'd get if they messed with it so I touched it. I make SURE to hide it.
SmashinPissers
The game has changed, but the players are the same!
pianostacatto
I have one, most fun ever with fly swatting! "Ah hah! I've got you now! (traps fly against wall with caged swatter, presses button)"
I enjoy making wasps become crispy smoking corpses.
There's just something so satisfying with electrocution. Makes you wonder if being the guy who flips the switch is a great job, or not.
Jusmar
I couldn't deal with the screams.
Bet it depends on who is in the chair.
DrBuckarooBanzai
"My old urethra stretcher just wasn't as challenging" -- OP's dad
RealVersionsOfStories
Fucking legendary comment right here
CarpeTiger
D: Augh. AUGH. Augh!
quicktochuckle
I'm a girl and that made even me shiver.
DavesDebbiesandSlagathor
Well you do have a urethra regardless and it would be painful to attempt to stick this up there
Yeah... I didn't even think of that... it's so much worse now.
TheWholiganOfGallifrey
So what I'm hearing is that you're not male?
Indeed. My lucky self was made into a womb guardian. An 'innie'. A cave grower of bastards and bitches alike. I. AM. WOMAN. *nods*
YoureAllUpInMyMixLikeFuckinBettyCrocker
And you win my lady crush of the day! That was one of the best comments I've read :)
420xxx69CommunismWillWin69xxx420
Womb Guardian sounds like the final boss in a really weird Japanese RPG.
I feel like I could get along quite well with you.
Cheers :D
mastervalmont
Now that was a good comment.
cerastes
Isn't that called sounding? I remember a gif of a dude shoving a 1" diameter 60 degree bent rod into his dick. Pretty cool.
StrangerWithBenefits
Right now someone is most likely inventing a new subreddit.
BRAYDENNNNN
no need r/spacedicks already exists!
I'm disgusted. Interested, but disgusted.
CasualFridayHandjob
You and I have differing opinions on the definition of the word "Cool"
ZaneDonovan
*horror but intrigue*
TheCarpetMatchesTheDrapes
That guy who did 'One Guy One Jar' did a video of him sounding with a screwdriver. A bit gory and
one1deuce
Link please
CheeseIsNaturesFudge
sounds like its lost forever but I'd be heading for shockmansion and rotten.com
Oh man, I must have seen it 10 years ago. This was back when BME video compilations were the go-to shock thing. Might be in there.
classyfancygay
I'm gonna need that link as well...
spiritualbeingonahumanjourney
1) I assume this is a flyswatter 2) If it is...go buy yourself a bug-a-salt. Best fly swatter ever invented.
corditedelite
Air rifle with no projectile works well too
waitbutactually
My dad has one of these. He backed the kickstarter. It's now hanging on the wall under a deer bust like a trophy.
ThatShiftyMonkey
should give him a big oak plaque with a small fly mounted on it to put on the wall by the gun.
norill
this is so american
mindstorm8191
Dont you people know how to kill flies? They're GONNA move, you just gotta hit where they WILL be WHEN your hand lands... & a little luck
derpsypie
I want one where can i get it.
DefinitelyNotAnAssassinHidingInAHaybale
Aka Dean Winchester's favorite weapon.
robbiedarob
That looks awesome
scrim4
How well does it kill wasps? Also, where can I buy that glorious device?
Michael891
I looked this up in YouTube and bought one because of you. Not sure if I should say thanks or fuck you for making me spend money.
PongLenis
Da fuq
NotSoSlimJim
Bruh...
tobucks
"Accurate within 3 feet." So is my flyswatter.
Jufasa
Now all I need is more flies
CorporalMercy
I may or may not occasionally get drunk and rig up in my full issued tactical gear and hunt flies with mine
wbeuthry
You say that like there's another option.
thesethingsarestupid
I want one. We deal with spiders at my place . they're everywhere
rezodog
I have a BugaSalt... best impulse buy i have ever made! Always was grossed out by the squished fly all over everything. No More
doesit
I want.
superpatito
oh this, I need this!
dekket
Being a Swede, I'm assuming this is illegal here. We never get to have any fun!
Synophmn
I need this in my life.
m0wgli
I'm gonna buy me one of these bad boys but next summer cause all the flies are dead now in Oregon.
pitcher17
Here! Take my money!
HowDoYouGIF
I must know if they ship internationally. (And if it works with wasps.)
Raw82
Any excuse to shout get to the choppa as you blow those flies away.....!
phunkyeah
That thing can't kill any bug I have shot with it. Fun, but useless.
Xaldyn
Wtf is that ! I hope to never encounter this nope !
IMayHaveTimeForThat
It's a hilarious video of a nope trying to hide. Look it up
whyattearp
I killed 16 flies in under 1min near the dog turds
Dooood
M-M-M-M-M-MONSTER KILL!!!!!!!!!
killermachis
That's a gnarly kills per minute ratio, GG
Yeah but now your poop is salty, how am I supposed to eat it now?!
I'm sure the salt comes off when I toss it in the neighbors pool
But you're not certain? Do you really want to risk it?
N0ticeablyFAT
Airsoft pistols are way more difficult, but also way more fun. Also, your buddy's wife won't find it nearly as entertaining. Fair warning.
dillpickle
Bug gun
Croaks
Friend has one. He shoots his brothers from distances.
azarza
+1 relevant username!
kmotalleb
after the mid-poop huge illusive house centipede situation I don't poop without a bug-a-salt
ImHigh
I remember seeing a video of this in use or a gif or something.
There's a fucking shotgun made specifically for nopes? What a time to be alive.
TastyBrainMeats
It works well against flies, not so well against tougher critters (spiders, etc).
Sounds like a challenge to me.
therealaport
Why nobody amazed this is a thing?! Im so happy!!
Mazasstic
.
IChangedMyUsernameSoMyEmployerCantFindMe
I have one sitting next to me right now...best thing ever
123somethingcreative123
Thanks, I now have dead flies and salt all over my living room.
TheTeenageMutantNinjaTurtles
Sam and Dean would love this.
MindRape
Use sugar = COD Zombies IRL
FrankTheTrashmanReynolds
Also prevents Gail the snail
CaptainCheers
Nice reference. +1
chingbao
Nobody likes to salt the snail. But it has to be done.
LordAaron
I need
wufflewaffle
This is a thing?? Commenting for future ref...
lilbrother
But you have to always shoot it over your left shoulder, or it's bad luck.
wannadobuttstuff
Why wouldn't the small tight pattern be sniper?
bzip2
https://youtu.be/2G5A_dY1I2Q
asspickle
I need to some more german gun guy
kingAPwhammy
I want one so bad.
GiantFlyingDishwasher
darkvelieris
Comment For Later +1
schokobecher
For further online shopping reference
Sheepyhead
Eh I'm more into melee weaponry
vondeluth
FUCK SALT
silvermare
Found the ghost!
HardOnStrokeFoundation
My friend saw one of these for the first time, picked it up, pointed it at my face and shot me in the eye without even knowing what it was..
psyduckdontgiveafuck
That is a good friend. A friend that may end up killing you, but don't worry "they thought it would be hilarious".
Plus think of all the youtube outvotes he can now harvest
nkaplan89
Also Fun at parties, just fill it up with your favorite cocaine. Shoot in large crowds and whamm instant party!
nightgamer06
I use it on myself!
squibble
Your parties sound amazing. Invite pls
HarryPotterReferenceProbably
"As an insect extermination enthusiast"
But not ants nor spiders. Never mind for now the fact a spider isn't an insect.
Shakezilla
Commenting to come back to later and buy.
TwelveAngryMuffins
This looks fun.
StillDevelopmental
I now know what to say when the husband asks me what I want for my birthday.
ZealotOfRovagug
I live in Waco and use a tennis racket to swat bugs. The wires slice through horse flies mid air if you swing it hard enough.
Bonus: also prevents demons.
Misformanatee
You're no idjit
IveNeverSeenAnOcelot
What you did there, I seent it!
DarthFutuza
Are demons allergic to salt?
SecludedGhost
In various mythos it can burn them, doubly so if blessed.
ohfuckIhavetopickausername
Does that mean I can pee on them to drive them away? Doubly so if I drink holy water?
Uuuuh, depends. Don't try it with Daemonettes, you'll probably have a bad time.
Is that where the old folklore tradition of throwing salt over your shoulder comes from?
As a matter of fact, it's similar! The idea being if you had bad luck, the devil was behind you, so you slung salt in his face.
was821
*cough* ghosts *cough*
harmedgreen
What you're doing there. God's work.
MyNamelsReek
But according to supernatural salt does prevent demons..?
glittergoats
I always up vote supernatural.
letsgetastrophysical
I believe it prevents demons from entering a room. It doesn't do anything to them if you hit them with it.
LordScamingham
Id rather deal with flys then have salty carpet.
DarkSock
Salty Carpet is a fetish site on Pornhub. Is what a friend told me.
THEALLCAPSWARRIOR
"FRIEND"
Kaenia
I'd rather deal with salty carpet than flies and nopes.
Let the flies hit the floor
If you vacuum and sweep on the reg it is no big deal. It only shoots a pinch at a time.
orangeman10987
Yeah, if you clean so infrequently that the salt from this gun will build up, your house is already gross.
HippoDidIt
One word. VACUUM
One word. "Humidity" yeah they don't mix well
Dude, you can't just yell Virginia Cum in public.
EugeneMeltsner
Interesting fact: in the past, Russians would shoot salt out of shotguns at trespassers as a way to deter them. They probably still do it,
2/2 but they did it in the past, too. Usually can't sit for a week after that.
wailbait
Rock salt rounds are common is a lot of places but you have to be about 10 feet away from the target to actually do anything.
Imneverthatguy
So now I have salty all over my house and dead flies?
Kaydiddilybro
My buddy has one and he thinks it's funny to shoot me with it. But it's very fun and satisfying to shoot the bugs
BalletAndCats
Does it hurt?
It's mildly annoying but not painful.
MisterWho
Preserved for freshness.
Blunderhorse
It not only shoots only a tiny amount of salt, but the force it shoots it with will shatter the salt on impact with a hard surface
hashbrowned
It seasons your dead flies so that you dont have to! Nutritious AND delicious :D
[deleted]
thatnewwordsmell
Shoot the ants. Go all in like arnie in the jungle against the predator.
DavosSeaworthTheOnionKnight
Ants like sugar...not salt
nonpondo
They actually like food, they'll eat chicken bones
MyCatLikesToFruitcake
It shoots so little salt you won't even notice it.
Iassann
It shoots so little salt you wouldn't even hit the flies. FTFY
Autocorrekt
That's what I tell my gf
OldSwedishGrandma
Said no woman ever!
StubbyJohnson
Just enough to attract ants
lurkerburzerker
I noticed it. and more often than not, they would just be stunned. if you didn't get them quick they flew away - gave 'em to the nephews
Those are some strong flies. Though stunning them probably makes it easy to kill instead of chasing.
Was it the original or the 2.0? Most flies I hit were killed or severely injured on impact. Wasps, however, only got a concussion
the 2.0 - nephews love it tho
Abominor
That is painfully american.
Haha, did I hit a nerve or what? This was at +4 last night...
fileiddiz
Happiness... is a warm... yes, it is...
Step 1) Get rid of dead flies (you do that with any flyswatter) Step 2) Vacuum your carpet Step 3) Sweep your floor Step 4) Happy hunting
B4C0N22
Step 5) burn your house
IWISHIWASRELEVANT
But the fly sticks to the fly swatter, and i don't normally have to vacuum
trippinoctopus
but it's much more fun to shoot them with salt
azcatraz
I shot a fly with a nerf gun once. It was impressive. And messy.
If i wasn't so lazy, i could afford the fun of shooting them with salt
Corbinator
Does this work on wasps?
Point blank for 3 or 4 shots. Yep...but they get super pissed off.
JersTheVideoGuy
Could hook it to a remote system.
Haha thanks, maybe get for outside wasp hunting for when I'm drunk...
I've used water sprayers set to mist, they can't fly in the mist, so they are forced to avoid it. Box them into a corner
Then you have a bunch of pissed off wasps that run to you
Good idea!
Just do the same thing except use gasoline.
The following step is a given but LIGHT THOSE MOTHER FUCKERS UP.
gindiesel
worst sword ever
Meerkatking1
When a fly lands, clap your hands about 2 inches above it and see what happens
TheLimpinBiscuit
[sees all the comments about a fly swatter] You mean this isn't a litter scoop?
PunchViolenceInTheFace
My dad nails flies with rubber bands, mid air even, tell your dad to get on my dad's level...scrub.
FocacciaIsLife
I like this game. My entry is "littler box scooper".
Sataina
I like using a fly zapper and hearing them die
BetaTester112
Blue waffle?
rghtwo
no no no, oh hell no
jmdinbtr
Who want's to google the blue waffle?
Grudgebearingmidget
You are a monster, and you should feel ashamed for this post.
Klingon00
The REAL hard mode: https://nypdecider.files.wordpress.com/2014/11/karate-kid-gif-1.gif
Caylin
That is master mode
Marioloko
dark souls mode
SolaireSB
\[T]'/
CallMeJerryBecauseIAmJerry
NG++
Pulleylube
somebody still using the broken straight sword hilt eh
CallMeJerryBecauseIAmJerry
Slightly upgraded. Ever so slightly... :)
famousbrowser
Ugh, I still remember first DS when I missed the sword pickup and had to beat first 4 enemies just with hilt. Took me 2 hours. It was great.
Claidecon
Plot twist, he uses it to spank OP's mom!
SpearSharp
Everything is a weapon if you know how to use it >:D
Teabagus
Hahahahahahahaha, if u could only see mine
KrakedUp
That thing has seen a lot of paddling.
Deadplaything
Laughed harder than I should of.
neen26
Butt scratcha?!
SlimIsntShady
Get your butt scratcha!
CallMeJerryBecauseIAmJerry
Butt scratcha!
BetaTester112
Get yo but scratchas!
hwatL4bloopy
What is that cheater shit? Use your bare hands or a spoon. And hard mode is chopsticks. (I took martial arts as a child and asian)
pIanetarysociety
if that's hard mode, this is expert mode: http://imgur.com/AO5osM0
spinningiswinning
That title... that's what she said.
ShowMeBunnies
Am I the only one who flicks them to death?
ninmonkey
I at least buy coffee before flicking someone I just met.
JamEngulfer
You want real hard mode? Catch each fly in a glass and put them out.
elimasterofall
Are we supposed to know what that is?
spamfolder7777
flyswatter
AstralBeast808
Context: It's a flyswatter.
goodguyC
I just bought this bad boy: http://images.productwiki.com/upload/images/electric_fly_swatter-400-400.jpg It was a massacre!!!
pIanetarysociety
those things are fun to convince your drunk friends to lick
goodguyC
Calm down there satan...
tresamber
the smell of burning flies though. *scarred for life*
goodguyC
Not gonna lie, there was definitely an odor....of victory over the vanquished!!
Whisperdeer3
So if he hits one is he the King Of Swat?
LvAllen
The Sultan of Swat. The King of Crash, man. More than a human, but less than a god. Like, Hercules or something.
JAFIOI
The Titan of Terror, The Colossus of Clout. The Great Bambino!
ImTheGoddamnBatwoman
As someone who was harshly disciplined as a kid, I did not see that as a flyswatter.
Jetg10
Maybe your parents saw you as a fly.
spamfolder7777
You got a flyswatter? I got a wooden spoon or a belt depending on if it was my mom or dad.
SaintMaceToTheFace
Are you me?
FluffyPinknMoist
Sheeet, I got beat with a doggin bat. It's made for horses.
CrowDeMorcerf
And how old are you now?
FluffyPinknMoist
48, I'm old.
CrowDeMorcerf
Naww, you're just experienced.
FluffyPinknMoist
You know it. (Not really) Well some things, yeah.
WhimsicalCalamari
...flyswatter?
WhimsicalCalamari
why did you idiots have to go and make this my sixth most-upvoted comment
bentee762
Yes
leftyshuckles
Dick tapper
DRStarsick
dildo
seeet
flyswaffles
IUpvoteEveryPostISee
Ass swatter
Detox208
It's called a blue waffle.. Trust me. Google it
MarvinOGravelBalloonFace
Flysniper.
TheBlackxRanger
yswatte
danny0762
Anythings a butt plug if you're brave enough
itsAone
kidswatter
Dreadends
Flies water
jammyjarman
Buttscratcher!
illwatchitburnwhileyougetmeadrink
Waffles
SquidJesus
No, now it's just a swatter.
TheBlackxRanger
sweater
RadishSaysHi
Advanced flyswatter
DownvoteMeMore
Ass-swatter
TyrdCrapply
PsuPepperoni
Don't kill bees man
TyrdCrapply
Sorry, should have specified: yellow jackets. And they are assholes this time of year!
MY0BL1V10N
Tennis Racket
laacis2
whats left of it
thefurredreich
dildo
nuplsstahp
Ewww
ItsMaidMariansForestNow
Everything about me cringed and tightened.
UnhelpfulAnswers
Then you are ready..
eyeLied
that got me wet
Gallifreynian
....Kay.
UnspokenX
Try an electric fly swatter and call me.
SlobberToilet
Grill spatula when not swatting flies
lovemesomepoptarts
Watter
BenjaminFink
spatula mmmmmmm
Steakunit
I love spatulas so much I bought the company
Pontation
Spatula
DougDervidson
Butt-water
420B0ngRips4Jesus69
Spatula
thisheretexasdude
splatula
Xorflank
How brave?
SherpaRage
"Ice water, flyswatter; gonna get you through the day."
TOTOAFRICA
butt scratcher!
ifyouarereadingthisbuymeataco
http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/family-guy-buttscratcher.gif
ThisMeansALot
BUTT SCRATCHER!!!!!
LadyYmir
Butt scratcher?
TheMexicanStaringFrog0fSouthernSriLanka
Buttscratcher :(
Snarknado
Butt scratchaaah!
realscrumpysteve
BUTT SCRATCHER!
TheOriginalJerk
Flyswatter
keanukin
MAYBE FLYSWATTER CAN BE OUR ALWAYS ??
MidgetGiraffe
Flyswatter
ChineseTakeAway
Wysflatter
NipplesInAJar
Wise Flatter.
BottleofDjinn
Weiss Matter.
SheWhoImgurs
Can you please ask him to break off the two mini rows on the left side? That'd be great.
XMasnaX
Thank you for stating that... It's like people who leave the stickers on new items. Drives us OCD'ers bat shit crazy!
KuuroiYuki
*columns
SheWhoImgurs
Thanks! I didn't even notice my error.
Synsei
That would be cheating to the next level. Last top level is just a stick.
Koshunae
Hes using it to his advantage. More surface area to clip those smug flies. Yeah. I saw you try to land on my food. Smug bug-eyed assholes.
sm4rt4lex
Once you get one of those electric zapper ones the game changes entirely.
MoreDonutsPerDonut
I love mine, especially when the fly drops smoking and spinning on the floor
DuckTruck
The $2 ones from harbor freight use D cell batteries. Bug cease to exist after a hit from one of those
CindyWho4
I have one & kids. 1 night on Ambien wanted to know exactly what they'd get if they messed with it so I touched it. I make SURE to hide it.
SmashinPissers
The game has changed, but the players are the same!
pianostacatto
I have one, most fun ever with fly swatting! "Ah hah! I've got you now! (traps fly against wall with caged swatter, presses button)"
CindyWho4
I enjoy making wasps become crispy smoking corpses.
pianostacatto
There's just something so satisfying with electrocution. Makes you wonder if being the guy who flips the switch is a great job, or not.
Jusmar
I couldn't deal with the screams.
CindyWho4
Bet it depends on who is in the chair.
DrBuckarooBanzai
"My old urethra stretcher just wasn't as challenging" -- OP's dad
RealVersionsOfStories
Fucking legendary comment right here
CarpeTiger
D: Augh. AUGH. Augh!
quicktochuckle
I'm a girl and that made even me shiver.
DavesDebbiesandSlagathor
Well you do have a urethra regardless and it would be painful to attempt to stick this up there
quicktochuckle
Yeah... I didn't even think of that... it's so much worse now.
TheWholiganOfGallifrey
So what I'm hearing is that you're not male?
quicktochuckle
Indeed. My lucky self was made into a womb guardian. An 'innie'. A cave grower of bastards and bitches alike. I. AM. WOMAN. *nods*
YoureAllUpInMyMixLikeFuckinBettyCrocker
And you win my lady crush of the day! That was one of the best comments I've read :)
quicktochuckle
420xxx69CommunismWillWin69xxx420
Womb Guardian sounds like the final boss in a really weird Japanese RPG.
TheWholiganOfGallifrey
I feel like I could get along quite well with you.
quicktochuckle
Cheers :D
mastervalmont
Now that was a good comment.
cerastes
Isn't that called sounding? I remember a gif of a dude shoving a 1" diameter 60 degree bent rod into his dick. Pretty cool.
StrangerWithBenefits
Right now someone is most likely inventing a new subreddit.
BRAYDENNNNN
no need r/spacedicks already exists!
TheWholiganOfGallifrey
I'm disgusted. Interested, but disgusted.
CasualFridayHandjob
You and I have differing opinions on the definition of the word "Cool"
ZaneDonovan
*horror but intrigue*
TheCarpetMatchesTheDrapes
That guy who did 'One Guy One Jar' did a video of him sounding with a screwdriver. A bit gory and
one1deuce
Link please
CheeseIsNaturesFudge
sounds like its lost forever but I'd be heading for shockmansion and rotten.com
cerastes
Oh man, I must have seen it 10 years ago. This was back when BME video compilations were the go-to shock thing. Might be in there.
classyfancygay
I'm gonna need that link as well...
spiritualbeingonahumanjourney
1) I assume this is a flyswatter 2) If it is...go buy yourself a bug-a-salt. Best fly swatter ever invented.
corditedelite
Air rifle with no projectile works well too
waitbutactually
My dad has one of these. He backed the kickstarter. It's now hanging on the wall under a deer bust like a trophy.
ThatShiftyMonkey
should give him a big oak plaque with a small fly mounted on it to put on the wall by the gun.
norill
this is so american
mindstorm8191
Dont you people know how to kill flies? They're GONNA move, you just gotta hit where they WILL be WHEN your hand lands... & a little luck
derpsypie
I want one where can i get it.
DefinitelyNotAnAssassinHidingInAHaybale
Aka Dean Winchester's favorite weapon.
robbiedarob
That looks awesome
scrim4
How well does it kill wasps? Also, where can I buy that glorious device?
Michael891
I looked this up in YouTube and bought one because of you. Not sure if I should say thanks or fuck you for making me spend money.
PongLenis
Da fuq
NotSoSlimJim
Bruh...
tobucks
"Accurate within 3 feet." So is my flyswatter.
Jufasa
Now all I need is more flies
CorporalMercy
I may or may not occasionally get drunk and rig up in my full issued tactical gear and hunt flies with mine
wbeuthry
You say that like there's another option.
thesethingsarestupid
I want one. We deal with spiders at my place . they're everywhere
rezodog
I have a BugaSalt... best impulse buy i have ever made! Always was grossed out by the squished fly all over everything. No More
doesit
I want.
superpatito
oh this, I need this!
dekket
Being a Swede, I'm assuming this is illegal here. We never get to have any fun!
Synophmn
I need this in my life.
m0wgli
I'm gonna buy me one of these bad boys but next summer cause all the flies are dead now in Oregon.
pitcher17
Here! Take my money!
HowDoYouGIF
I must know if they ship internationally. (And if it works with wasps.)
Raw82
Any excuse to shout get to the choppa as you blow those flies away.....!
phunkyeah
That thing can't kill any bug I have shot with it. Fun, but useless.
Xaldyn
Raw82
Wtf is that ! I hope to never encounter this nope !
IMayHaveTimeForThat
It's a hilarious video of a nope trying to hide. Look it up
whyattearp
I killed 16 flies in under 1min near the dog turds
Dooood
M-M-M-M-M-MONSTER KILL!!!!!!!!!
killermachis
That's a gnarly kills per minute ratio, GG
ninmonkey
Yeah but now your poop is salty, how am I supposed to eat it now?!
whyattearp
I'm sure the salt comes off when I toss it in the neighbors pool
ninmonkey
But you're not certain? Do you really want to risk it?
N0ticeablyFAT
Airsoft pistols are way more difficult, but also way more fun. Also, your buddy's wife won't find it nearly as entertaining. Fair warning.
dillpickle
Bug gun
Croaks
Friend has one. He shoots his brothers from distances.
azarza
+1 relevant username!
kmotalleb
after the mid-poop huge illusive house centipede situation I don't poop without a bug-a-salt
ImHigh
I remember seeing a video of this in use or a gif or something.
Xaldyn
There's a fucking shotgun made specifically for nopes? What a time to be alive.
TastyBrainMeats
It works well against flies, not so well against tougher critters (spiders, etc).
Xaldyn
Sounds like a challenge to me.
therealaport
Why nobody amazed this is a thing?! Im so happy!!
Mazasstic
.
IChangedMyUsernameSoMyEmployerCantFindMe
I have one sitting next to me right now...best thing ever
123somethingcreative123
Thanks, I now have dead flies and salt all over my living room.
TheTeenageMutantNinjaTurtles
Sam and Dean would love this.
MindRape
Use sugar = COD Zombies IRL
FrankTheTrashmanReynolds
Also prevents Gail the snail
CaptainCheers
Nice reference. +1
chingbao
Nobody likes to salt the snail. But it has to be done.
LordAaron
I need
wufflewaffle
This is a thing?? Commenting for future ref...
lilbrother
But you have to always shoot it over your left shoulder, or it's bad luck.
wannadobuttstuff
Why wouldn't the small tight pattern be sniper?
bzip2
https://youtu.be/2G5A_dY1I2Q
asspickle
I need to some more german gun guy
kingAPwhammy
I want one so bad.
GiantFlyingDishwasher
.
darkvelieris
Comment For Later +1
schokobecher
For further online shopping reference
Sheepyhead
Eh I'm more into melee weaponry
vondeluth
FUCK SALT
silvermare
Found the ghost!
HardOnStrokeFoundation
My friend saw one of these for the first time, picked it up, pointed it at my face and shot me in the eye without even knowing what it was..
psyduckdontgiveafuck
That is a good friend. A friend that may end up killing you, but don't worry "they thought it would be hilarious".
ninmonkey
Plus think of all the youtube outvotes he can now harvest
nkaplan89
Also Fun at parties, just fill it up with your favorite cocaine. Shoot in large crowds and whamm instant party!
nightgamer06
I use it on myself!
squibble
Your parties sound amazing. Invite pls
HarryPotterReferenceProbably
"As an insect extermination enthusiast"
ninmonkey
But not ants nor spiders. Never mind for now the fact a spider isn't an insect.
Shakezilla
Commenting to come back to later and buy.
TwelveAngryMuffins
This looks fun.
StillDevelopmental
I now know what to say when the husband asks me what I want for my birthday.
ZealotOfRovagug
I live in Waco and use a tennis racket to swat bugs. The wires slice through horse flies mid air if you swing it hard enough.
AstralBeast808
Bonus: also prevents demons.
Misformanatee
You're no idjit
IveNeverSeenAnOcelot
What you did there, I seent it!
DarthFutuza
Are demons allergic to salt?
SecludedGhost
In various mythos it can burn them, doubly so if blessed.
ohfuckIhavetopickausername
Does that mean I can pee on them to drive them away? Doubly so if I drink holy water?
SecludedGhost
Uuuuh, depends. Don't try it with Daemonettes, you'll probably have a bad time.
DarthFutuza
Is that where the old folklore tradition of throwing salt over your shoulder comes from?
SecludedGhost
As a matter of fact, it's similar! The idea being if you had bad luck, the devil was behind you, so you slung salt in his face.
was821
*cough* ghosts *cough*
harmedgreen
What you're doing there. God's work.
MyNamelsReek
But according to supernatural salt does prevent demons..?
glittergoats
I always up vote supernatural.
letsgetastrophysical
I believe it prevents demons from entering a room. It doesn't do anything to them if you hit them with it.
LordScamingham
Id rather deal with flys then have salty carpet.
DarkSock
Salty Carpet is a fetish site on Pornhub. Is what a friend told me.
THEALLCAPSWARRIOR
"FRIEND"
Kaenia
I'd rather deal with salty carpet than flies and nopes.
ninmonkey
Let the flies hit the floor
spiritualbeingonahumanjourney
If you vacuum and sweep on the reg it is no big deal. It only shoots a pinch at a time.
orangeman10987
Yeah, if you clean so infrequently that the salt from this gun will build up, your house is already gross.
HippoDidIt
One word. VACUUM
LordScamingham
One word. "Humidity" yeah they don't mix well
ninmonkey
Dude, you can't just yell Virginia Cum in public.
EugeneMeltsner
Interesting fact: in the past, Russians would shoot salt out of shotguns at trespassers as a way to deter them. They probably still do it,
EugeneMeltsner
2/2 but they did it in the past, too. Usually can't sit for a week after that.
wailbait
Rock salt rounds are common is a lot of places but you have to be about 10 feet away from the target to actually do anything.
Imneverthatguy
So now I have salty all over my house and dead flies?
Kaydiddilybro
My buddy has one and he thinks it's funny to shoot me with it. But it's very fun and satisfying to shoot the bugs
BalletAndCats
Does it hurt?
Kaydiddilybro
It's mildly annoying but not painful.
MisterWho
Preserved for freshness.
Blunderhorse
It not only shoots only a tiny amount of salt, but the force it shoots it with will shatter the salt on impact with a hard surface
hashbrowned
It seasons your dead flies so that you dont have to! Nutritious AND delicious :D
[deleted]
[deleted]
thatnewwordsmell
Shoot the ants. Go all in like arnie in the jungle against the predator.
DavosSeaworthTheOnionKnight
Ants like sugar...not salt
nonpondo
They actually like food, they'll eat chicken bones
MyCatLikesToFruitcake
It shoots so little salt you won't even notice it.
Iassann
It shoots so little salt you wouldn't even hit the flies. FTFY
Autocorrekt
That's what I tell my gf
OldSwedishGrandma
Said no woman ever!
StubbyJohnson
Just enough to attract ants
lurkerburzerker
I noticed it. and more often than not, they would just be stunned. if you didn't get them quick they flew away - gave 'em to the nephews
MyCatLikesToFruitcake
Those are some strong flies. Though stunning them probably makes it easy to kill instead of chasing.
Blunderhorse
Was it the original or the 2.0? Most flies I hit were killed or severely injured on impact. Wasps, however, only got a concussion
lurkerburzerker
the 2.0 - nephews love it tho
Abominor
That is painfully american.
Abominor
Haha, did I hit a nerve or what? This was at +4 last night...
fileiddiz
Happiness... is a warm... yes, it is...
spiritualbeingonahumanjourney
Step 1) Get rid of dead flies (you do that with any flyswatter) Step 2) Vacuum your carpet Step 3) Sweep your floor Step 4) Happy hunting
B4C0N22
Step 5) burn your house
IWISHIWASRELEVANT
But the fly sticks to the fly swatter, and i don't normally have to vacuum
trippinoctopus
but it's much more fun to shoot them with salt
azcatraz
I shot a fly with a nerf gun once. It was impressive. And messy.
IWISHIWASRELEVANT
If i wasn't so lazy, i could afford the fun of shooting them with salt
Corbinator
Does this work on wasps?
spiritualbeingonahumanjourney
Point blank for 3 or 4 shots. Yep...but they get super pissed off.
JersTheVideoGuy
Could hook it to a remote system.
Corbinator
Haha thanks, maybe get for outside wasp hunting for when I'm drunk...
mindstorm8191
I've used water sprayers set to mist, they can't fly in the mist, so they are forced to avoid it. Box them into a corner
ninmonkey
Then you have a bunch of pissed off wasps that run to you
Corbinator
Good idea!
JersTheVideoGuy
Just do the same thing except use gasoline.
JersTheVideoGuy
The following step is a given but LIGHT THOSE MOTHER FUCKERS UP.