SportForOurNeighbors
132249
1934
136
Dec 17, 2021 4:51 PM
SportForOurNeighbors
132249
1934
136
seedye
“I HAVE NO EMOTIONS!!!!!!” Geralt screamed emotionally.
NickRivieraMD
bell hooks changed my outlook on a lot of things
DanFranzen
RIP bell hooks
BatsArentBugs
Hero.
redditmcredditface
I mean testosterone is a thing also. we cant blame society for everything
PainfulThoughts
Only complaint I've ever had with feminism is the same I had with BLK. Idiots co-opting it and talking nonsense. Otherwise, full support.
NonSequitarian
The first act of peoplearchy is to establish who's on top of the peoplearchy
PictureArchiver
There was a time where men would show actual affection towards their male friends. They would hug, they would kiss, they would hold hands
FreeRangeHuman
Ha Gayyyyyyhh
PictureArchiver
and they would do so openly without fearing judgment from society. There's nothing wrong, and there is nothing wrong, with showing affection
JamSandwichUK
I hug my buds all the time. Not gonna hold hands tho. My girlfriend might get pissed.
JamSandwichUK
I am a feminist.
Xerrai
How about we just stop telling guys they need to be emotional or non emotional and just leave them to whatever they go for?
Xerrai
I feel like all this does is push guys into something else when we should just shut up and let them be who they want? Idk
Kbantar
I am rather stoic like my mom. But our dad taught my brothers and me that expressing emotion and crying were normal and healthy. Go figure.
SidJorgenson
I am a man. I am OK. (most days I imagine creative ways of killing myself). I am FINE
ArandomDane
This starts in the home, mothers have been in charge here at least since the industrialization... So how does removing men from leading 1/2
ArandomDane
2/2 roles in society (aka Patriarchy) change that. Trust me, my family have some matriarchs and it ain't better...
betmcc19721
The first act of violence toward a Male is the ritual of circumcision. Welcome to the world! Now we demand part of your penis!
Iwannaswiminapoolofpuppiesohwaitmaybenot
Yeah, I was studying for the Canadian citizenship test, read mention of cultures of violence, female genital mutilation not being tolerated
Iwannaswiminapoolofpuppiesohwaitmaybenot
But male genital mutilation is standard? Granted, circumcised men can still feel sexual pleasure, not so sure about women who were mutlized.
NKato
This is accurate.
luciferousthefallen0
Lost in all of this is that often it is women who enforce the patriarchy on men.
ThePastmaster
I'm not emotionally well connected save for irritation, sadness, and occasionally bouts of extreme wrath. At the same time I don't know 1/2
ThePastmaster
what self-esteem is other than the dictionary definition, nor do I know what pride feels like. 2/2
Hasufael
Start small. Clean your room. Then get yourself a kit project, something to build. Create something uniquely yours. You will find pride.
ThePastmaster
My house is clean and decorated for Christmas. Was into 40K models for awhile. Like building stuff, not so much painting. Feel nothing.
Hasufael
Miniatures can be a great hobby, and you don't have to paint things to create them!
ThePastmaster
While true they look unfinished unpainted. Painting is okay but I'm not very good at it.
Katabare
Yep. Marine corps. Yep.
LoudAngryJerk
*licks lips* oooh boy, the negative comments are gonna be fuggin TASTYYYYY
RectangularBusinessman
Lotta emotionally busted dudes here downvoting. You are trapped in an unlocked cage gentlemen. Open the door.
Dagordae
Got to say, I hate the wording but the actual meat of the statement is correct.
probablyobvious
It wasn't the patriarchy that removed my ability to show emotions. It was my mom's dementia. Easier to talk to her when she isn't hurt or /1
probablyobvious
Confused when her "reality" hurts me.
localsurfer
Oh fuck off, what a load of nonsense. Maybe this was true in the 1950s, but just no.
HiveFleetDohrnii
Disagree on the “feminism” portion, and phrasing it this way is a bit off putting, but agreed. It’s been freeing to feel emotions for once.
or0b0ur0s
Well, you can protect your boys from this, but not from the bullies who will then mercilessly hurt & sabotage them for perceived "weakness".
LastoftheLillyCreatures
That's why punching up is the only legit way to punch and why a tolerant society has to keep the intolerant without that power to bully.
graehall
"Gender isn't a social construct! That's propaganda! Now, don't act like a girl or you're not a man, Toxic Masculinity is being a real man!"
amityvilletoaster
It’s like a phantom pain now, I can feel something is missing but I’m not able to feel anything else. Maybe anger or slight happiness.
IDontKnowWhatToDoAnymoreAndImTired
There's a better way to say this. It demands men can only express themselves through happiness or anger. No sadness, frustration, or love.
IDontKnowWhatToDoAnymoreAndImTired
Everything has to be either "I'm happy with this"--but not so happy that it goes over into love--or "I'm angry" about any other emotion.
AnythingMuchShorter
This is so true. It reminds me of the time when I was in 3rd grade. A bunch of other boys were mocking me for crying because my hamster died
SportForOurNeighbors
Boooo!!! I'm sorry your hamster died!! And that people were mean to you. I hope you have better friends now.
AnythingMuchShorter
I work in tech in Seattle so I have no nearby friends now. But I have some very good far away friends.
Scallion420
I believe in equal rights for all. Therefore I am a feminist.
itstheendoftheworldasweknowitandifeelfine
Not dissimilar to the message of early this year. I believe that each individual has intrinsic value. Therefore, Black Lives Matter.
Largerabbit
I think it's ok to have a name for trying to heal men. Just like we have BLM. I didn't see anybody saying we had to call BLM feminism
waitwuh
I wouldn’t understand BLM as well if I didn’t understand feminism, first. Intersectionalism has a face, for me.
Largerabbit
And that's fine. But mypoint still stands. Telling guys their healing and peace are important but NOT important enough to be allowed a name>
Largerabbit
Is backwards and actively harming the cause
MemesAndDreams
Feel like that should be called equallist
KingKelloggTheWaffleHaggler
That would be smarter to do honestly as it would have a broader appeal
PaintedSlate
Kinda like the 1/4#er vs. Royale with Cheese, the new name would be for a culture that lacks that context, not as a rebranding.
PaintedSlate
Given the effectiveness of the RW media machine, any brand new name would be immediately weaponized, and we'd be worse off.
KingKelloggTheWaffleHaggler
I mean I doubt it can get worst than it already is. Using a single gendered term for something that's supposed to be equal has never worked
Trustrup
Correct term is eglatarian, or eglatarianism. There is a lot of feelings surrounding the word feminism, even though it’s used incorrectly.
galmata
in world where the scales weren't historically tilted overwhelmingly in one direction, it might be, but that isn't our world, unfortunately.
LinesOfCokeWithSnowman
yeah but like, we made it that way. us tilting the scales doesn't change the definition of equality. nahmsayin
MemesAndDreams
Feel like especially the past 10-15 years that's exactly the world we live in
loma45
Since it was specifically to combat the rights that women were being denied, "feminism" is quite apt. Same as "All Lives Matter" nonsense
Largerabbit
Yes. We used a specific term. Black lives matter. I didn't see anybody saying "no we should call that feminism"
schizznatt
You are misunderstanding the point. It’s an analogy. Telling someone they are an egalitarian when they say they are a feminist is the
schizznatt
equivalent of telling someone “all lives matter” when someone says “black lives matter”.
ZeroLogain
Perhaps the term feminism was quite apt, but as the discussion has changed, perhaps the terminology should as well?
loma45
I mean, Roe v Wade is on the edge of being ignored or downright repealed. I'm not sure enough has changed yet to leave the term behind
ZeroLogain
Then perhaps multiple terms.
ZeroCoolisCrashOverride
Technically you’re an egalitarian. A feminist desires equal rights based on gender alone whereas the former seeks equality on all bases.
PaintedSlate
So like intersectional feminism.
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
Egalitarian is a huge umbrella term that contains *all* equality movements. Feminism is the equality movement specific to sex.
Trustrup
Feminism is female equality in the areas where females has less equality than male. People are trying to encompas all equality for sex in
Trustrup
the word, but it’s biased by the name alone. While it’s very few areas men need equality in, feminism as term would be wrong to use there.
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
If you make women and men equal... they're equal. Every equality issue facing men has a flipside where there's inequality to women. Men /1
ProfBananaBread
My wife and I are both feminists. I’m a man though so I’m a little better at it than she is.
itstheendoftheworldasweknowitandifeelfine
Anything she can do, I can do better?
n0n53n53
30% better?
Wonkable
Lol. Bonus points if you explain it to her that she is wrong
DSREX
Damn it you made me laugh way to hard at that. Going to hell I guess.
Ezekiel117
Mansplaining is when a man explains something to you that you didn’t ask or need an explanation for
ArthurPhillipDent
What you did there,I see it.
RoadskiN
Being an emotional and non-aggressive male, has been hell on my mental health, and any career or romantic prospects.
itstheendoftheworldasweknowitandifeelfine
It is possible. I am a hetero CIS male who cries, has close female friends, hugs his male friends (gay, straight, trans or otherwise)
itstheendoftheworldasweknowitandifeelfine
to normalize it for those who aren't there yet, has a happy marriage (22 years!) to the love of his life, and is successful in his field.
itstheendoftheworldasweknowitandifeelfine
Be a man. Be real. Be human. Fuck the culture we were raised in. Love the people you care about deeply and tell them that you do.
margaretfoster0710
Yes! I love this! You go, boy, lol!
cadesama
My husband is an emotional, affectionate man and a successful mechanic. You deserve to be and love yourself.
MicroverseBatteryReality
Problem is most women don't even support feminism in that they push away men that express their weak emotions in favor of strong stoic men
EngorgedPhallus
And as a strong stoic man, I'm somehow a mutilated piece of shit for enjoying being masculine.
Crawmak
That's another aspect of toxic masculinity, little girls are also taught to seek men who do all those shitty practices
Htdgdhfffff
Yep. You learn that at a young age
MicroverseBatteryReality
So via natural selection, women promote toxic masculinity. Sad but true. TM will never disappear until women stop fucking those guys.
SkatingWeeb
the world needs more sensitive men, and i dont mean ones that fake being depressed for attention. (cough, ethan, cough)
Uonnay
Wait you got a career?
SerialChickenLover
I am the same kind of man and it’s confusing how much the same people will praise and condemn my sensitivity when it suits their interests
MemesAndDreams
Can feel that brother
Winterous
Stoicism is good and healthy, just don't presume you're made of stone.
MicroverseBatteryReality
Def of stoic: a person who can endure pain or hardship without showing their feelings or complaining. AKA women don't want emotional men.
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
Who are you to say what all women want? Every guy I've dated has been emotional, including my husband. I don't want some robot, I want a /1
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
human being for a partner. Emotion is a massive part of being human. Bottle it up all you want, it'll still come out. Usually as anger, /2
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
which is still an emotion. And I definitely don't want some insanely angry dude as a partner. Who would??? /3
JustAnotherVictimOfAmbientMorality
That's ... not what stoicism is.
MicroverseBatteryReality
Really? Cause I just googled the fucking definition and that's EXACTLY what it is.
JustAnotherVictimOfAmbientMorality
Lit. the 1st google hit explains it's a way of altering your feelings in relation to hardship, not suppressing sthem, but sure, keep arguing
GringoPieAsshole
That's exactly what it means.
culinarydream7224
Lot of dudes assume I'm gay. It's so much easier to associate with women and gay dudes because they're used to developing....
culinarydream7224
...personalities, whereas most straight dudes fit into the same mold in a slightly different way.
eathotdog
My names chad and I like football and hunting, or my names chet and I like buisness are the only two personalities for most straight men
culinarydream7224
Well they do have other interests, but generally think you want to fuck them if you try talking about those. Season 1 of Sherlock...
culinarydream7224
...captured the sentiment perfectly when some random person asked whether they were gay the moment their relationship went further than...
Neurisko
Yeah most dudes are like Family + Hobbies = Personality. A lot of women are like that too, though.
ultradongle
I was just telling my wife this the other day. I hang out with her and the women at gatherings because I like the conversations better.
TheMadOnion
Me not wanting to murder be a harmless snake because it had the audacity to exist in my yard. Neighbor: should have killed it like a man....
Rheios
Sounds like a very weak person, tbh. Real power isn't displayed in gaudy shows of force but in the confidence of not needing to display it.
TheMadOnion
No I have to prove I'm macho by murdering something a few hundred times smaller than me minding its own business, for no reason at all. Haha
belortik
Any time some says "act like a man" my response is always "everything I do is acting like a man because I am one."
jmartkdr
I don’t have to act, I am one.
KorbenMyManIHaveNoFire
I love snakes, so I thank you for respecting that it’s another living creature
TheMadOnion
Snakes are my favorite thing after cats. I was merely admiring the snake in my yard. Then my neighbor took exception to that. Lol
TheMadOnion
Like fucking excuse me my first instinct isn't violence for everything I do.
Kaileeb92
Steve Erwin is smiling down at you
TheMadOnion
Steve Irwin was my childhood hero, I was devastated when he died. :(
criticallyours
He would have been proud of your understanding of the snake and its nature. Keep it up.
OldEricCool
People like that need to learn that mercy can be manly. No need to be so afraid of the world that you have to kill a harmless creature.
upfr0mhere
Okay but I consider the spider that crawled ACROSS MY FACE while I was as half asleep to have committed an act of war
OldEricCool
It was probably on its way to defend you from other bugs!
ImmortalChild
Feminism has become such a loaded word but the reality is that it benefits everyone. Be mad about it but it's true.
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ImmortalChild
graehall
Those who despise it want to make it a loaded word. I don't give them that power. Feminism is dope. It benefits erryone & I'm into that shit
ImmortalChild
I'm into you being into that shit :)
n0n53n53
it's almost like people intentionally distorted the meaning to make it worse than it is. CRT anyone?
naught101
Anarchism, socialism, unions, ...
ICreatedThisAccountToPostPicsOfMyTwoCats
Crazy ad its literally defined as "the advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes" which i think everyone agree on
kookyabird
Men opposed think it must result in them having less rights, and women who misrepresent it want to be above the other sex.
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
It *will* result in them not having extra privileges just for being a man. Unfortunately there are too many men who want to keep those /1
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
privileges, and think they have a right to, at the expense of women. And too many women standing beside those men, too. /2
ParanoidCarrot
there are two types of Feminism, the orginal old one equality for all, and the new one that has nothing to do with equality
ArkoneAxon
The problem is that it's been badly subverted since the 1960s. That's why Emma Watson decried the association of feminism with misandry>
ArkoneAxon
and called for it to be more inclusive. Later she gave interviews about how she was harassed and criticized for daring to suggest that men>
ArkoneAxon
could be victims too. (This is why I call such people "pseudo-feminists." Because they sure as hell aren't the real deal)
SufiJiuJitsu
I dunno Bell Hooks. The quote has a specific definition & Western view on what a patriarchy is and involves. It's not the same everywhere.
BruceLorneCampbell
I'm a strong independent man who doesn't need you to tell me what i can, and cannot, be mad at.
ImmortalChild
Feminism supports your choice, dude. Be or don't be mad about it, but if you want to stay in this Chili's bathroom, you gotta dance!
BruceLorneCampbell
I was making a bad attempt at being tongue in cheek <3
ImmortalChild
You can just say you wanna dance, man. It's all good ;)
Number1Sir
Oddfish
bell hooks actually gave Feminism one of it's most popular definitions: "Feminism is a movement to end sexism, sexist exploitation and
Oddfish
oppression." That was always the goal, though the movement has obviously changed with times and participants. Everyone here should read some
Oddfish
bell hooks. She was very important.
ArkoneAxon
It does. Unfortunately... https://www.pbs.org/newshour/economy/column-why-millennial-women-dont-want-to-call-themselves-feminists
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Ikwilstroopwaffels
Does Anita Sarkeesian make your peepee smol?
ImmortalChild
Sir, this Chili's bathroom glory hole is a feminist establishment and I invite you to leave if you can't handle it.
graehall
That's a disingenuous argument you'd hear 20 years ago. 30 years ago was the 90s bud. Feminism has progressed awesomely since then.
alex5775
Got a source on your data there?
ArkoneAxon
Ever heard of Valeria Solanas? Decades of self-professed "feminists" defending her and making half-joking references to the SCUM manifesto>
ArkoneAxon
are why women say, "I don't support feminism, I believe in equality." https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-47006912
SmugandFurry
MenOnFemisim.com, maybe?
graehall
The claim "Feminism was ok back then, but now it's gone too far" is the #1 talking point of sexist idiots wanting to seem like they're not.
ArkoneAxon
Yeah, tell it to Andy Warhol.
graehall
If your argument's a feminist killed a man so it's bad. Buddy the # of women killed by sexist men is historically staggering, hence feminism
JStengah
It's only loaded because whiny dudes are so invested in misrepresenting it.
palmo
Like critical race theory
Se7enPr1me
Dont forget the self proclaimed feminists that do that job even better
WibblyWobblySineLine
Literally, I used to be against it. Until I actually learned what it was from actual feminists, and not the lies told outside of it.
alaest0r
Im against tumblr-feminism and fad wokeness. The cult behavior and demonization of mens rights groups. I never had a problem with what 1/
alaest0r
If claimed it was about, only how it was used in practice by self-proclaimed feminists who don't know much about feminist theory or history.
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
Tbf, a lot of those men's rights groups are demonizing themselves, by spending all their time hating on women and feminism, instead of /1
ImmortalChild
Bingo :)
TheEvenPrez
Yep. If an ideology can empower people it gets politicized by reactionaries. If it’s toxic then The narrative is “everyone gets a say”
WeekendWarriorMark
Don’t forget loud whiny women that are invested in misrepresenting it (this is both lipstick feminist bashers & ultra conservative females)
kookyabird
I feel like women who abuse the concept of feminism are at least somewhat worse than men as well because it helps add fuel to the men.
TheGiantIdiotTeddyBear
There's misrepresentation at both extremes
graehall
"I'm more of an egalitarian, you see the problem with feminism is it has 'fem' in it & that means it's bad because I am a sexist moron"
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graehall
"It's people who criticise feminism who are the *real* victims" :P
alaest0r
Not what i said but sure, strawman away. I deleted before i saw your reply lol my point was dismissal of criticism so thanks.
kindpanda
Tbf previous waves is feminism were a bit less about equality. To be against feminism now though is absurd
RaineGrae
In my experience, its mostly women who misrepresent it. A lot of them are really misandrists or only fight for the female side. Its rare +
RaineGrae
for me to see other women speaking up about how fx. family court is in favor of the mother and similar issues where men need support.
JStengah
It's an inversion of a problem that feminists do seek to fix. The reason courts favor the mother is that women are stereotypically seen as
JStengah
the default caregivers, which also keeps them from getting hired or getting promotions (due to the belief that if they get pregnant they'll
Kamasu0Tra
Welp, time to harvest some downvotes. The purpose of feminism is the advancement of women's rights, and that's great, it's fantastic. It's
Kamasu0Tra
not another word for equality, and it's not about advancing men's rights. All of this is fine, so long as we don't shit on those who work to
Kamasu0Tra
advance the rights of men in regards to things like paternity, sentencing disparity, and social issues like men being viewed as pedophiles.
JStengah
Gonna save you some time, every "men's rights" issue is an inversion of a woman's rights issue. Feminism seeks equal treatment, not special
Kamasu0Tra
Gonna save you some time as well; if you can't bother to wait and let me finish two comments before making a reply, don't bother.
JStengah
I accurately predicted your complaint though