M4ckM
50340
2922
91
That moment when a fart turns rogue and it got you rushing to the bathroom like....
Happens to the best of us...
Aug 3, 2016 6:33 PM
M4ckM
50340
2922
91
Happens to the best of us...
dontmissme
The walk to the bathroom after he nuts inside you...
RD84
Well, you'd be Russian too...
ThePhDJ
what a ridiculous, ridiculous sport
PeterMerkin
Holy shit... 1 hour and 29 minutes into the race? That's some dedication to look that silly for that long.
jjn010
There's a race called the "2 hour speedwalk" and the goal is to walk as far as possible in 2 hours
ronnoct
What's crazy is they'll go for this long and the judges will DQ them at the last second for having both feet off the ground. Wild stuff
LonelyOneironaut
I wouldn't even want a gold medal in speed walking. Even if I was the best in the world I would just nope it.
Ironblitz
"you won an olypmic gold medal! Wait, why is the event scraped off.." " MIND YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS THAT'S WHY"
WayOfTheLethani
We joke and make fun but then you realize that these people can walk a mile faster than most of us can run one. As in ~7min per mile.
51CorgisInABar
Makin my way downtown...
OfficialNedFlanders
What the shit is this?
cptcr
No wrestling... but we got people who walk fast
Unverified
And this is in the Olympics....
dorkbot3000
Bob Costas took heat for saying "a contest to see who can walk the fastest is like having a contest to see who can whisper the loudest."
magila
Olympic Shart walking?
SantaCandyPadlockPeaceSpaceship
someone explain to me the origins of this "sport". I mean come on....
stupidinbredstackofmeat
She won't hatch any eggs walking that fast.
CaptainMuricas
This is a sport in the olympics, but Baseball is not. WTF
iDevilsdocry
Announcers: "And here is Toyota representing their new Prius".
MontanaPimpHand
Is this really a sport?
madradglad
Where is everyone else and what place is she in
Cheeseweenie
Asking the real questions.
MisanthropicAnthropoid
You came in like a cotton ball!
CMortar
So, what defines speed walking? Like, how did it differ from jogging/running?
isuckatbeingfunnysoipostcoolgeologicfeatures
The arm swinging, perhaps
gonetodublin
theres a certain position you have to keep your legs and arms as well but im not sure what it is
hillywut
You gotta have one foot on the ground at all times. Heel has to be down on one foot as the toe on the other foot comes off the ground
EadEchiC
Has to invent a leg race that white people could win. Doping doesn't count Russia
Pugnatrix95
Well you have to look extremely fucking stupid whilst doing it and you're good to go
thejadedcynic
True, but they're speed is deceptively impressive
Pugnatrix95
Yeah and the speed of a jogger or sprinter is even more impressive, i literally see no point in speed walking unless you can't jog
raytadd24
I think one foot has to be on the ground at all times.. My source is that one Malcolm in the middle episode where Hal becomes a speed walker
AlliterationAlert
Same
AerinRavage
*joy*
edaji88
This was proven to be incorrect in am episode of QI. Both feet can be off the ground, they just can't be noticed by the human eye
OverReactiongif
You are correct.
Wakborder517
Holy shit this is the first thing I thought about.
18yearoldBlackDynamite
every time
a55mu11e7
haha an that stupid looking helmet you could scratch your ass with.
ForensicsHound
Wtf did I just watch?
soundguyg
power walking?
Solkanarmy
I cannot believe that two stoners would think of this and call it a sport, let alone that a committee has apparently put it in the olympics
LilLarrySellers
Weird
BritishBatman
so what the fuck sport is this?
Kangarou
Speedwalking
BritishBatman
that... that's a sport?!
Kangarou
According to google, race walking. But, yes. In fairness, the distance for the competition is 50Km, so it's still impressive endurance-wise.
Kangarou
Correction: 50km for the men, 20km for the women.
ineedtostopeatingrice
Swiggity swooty! She comin straight for that booty!!
loungeking1
Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop,Gotta Poop!
TheyEatThePoopoo
Gotta eat, Gotta eat, Gotta eat, Gotta eat, Gotta eat,
TheUnsolicitedDuckPic
Gotta Poop, Gotta Poop, Gotta Poop, Gotta Poop, Gotta Poop, Gotta Poop, Gotta Poop, Gotta Poop, Gotta Poop, Gotta Poop, Gotta Poop
TheLunaDiviner
Story time: in high school a kid shit himself during the mile in gym class. Just dropped a twozie out his shorts while running. The (1/2)
TheLunaDiviner
(2/2) school knew by the very next period. Ruined his life for the subsequent 3 years
acosenti
I feel like race walkers are the furries of the Olympic world.
NotAnUberUsername
I need to ask this: How did you beautiful conjure up this sentence?
WorfsPruneJuice
Hal (Malcolm in the Middle) would disagree.
DrEXTREME
Its the weird cousin that the family doesn't talk about.
PitbullsPublicist
1 more day til olympics!
byohzzrd
I watched Olympic soccer today, Brazil vs China.
ClydeFerret
Womens soccer starts today
Ironblitz
It's hard to take an event seriously when one can wear dangling earrings and not worry about it.
Koshunae
Have you ever tried to walk as fast as you can for a 1/4 mile? Shits hard enough for 30 seconds
theicklestone
Have you ever watched female athletes? Some of them wear ABSURD jewelry regardless.
TheSatanCat
Maria Sharapova, for example. ALWAYS giant dangling earrings for tennis matches.
theicklestone
Yeah my first thought was Serena. She was wearing a huge, thick ring and on her racket hand!!!
maincarrot
i don't understand race walkers... what if... what if you go too fast, but going fast is the point?!
BartWillemsen
It's not about going to fast, but you need to "walk" as in, you need to have at least one foot on the ground at any time
krill3
At least one foot has to make contact with the ground at a time
maincarrot
ah, tricky.
gonetodublin
it's a very physically taxing event
BartWillemsen
As a sprinter myself I don't think I can withstand the urge to just run..
Zimno
mfw some guy is going to accidentally win when he's just looking for pokemon
TheBiggestOfAllTheButts
I know a few people who do it. Maintaining proper form us a bitch and it kills your hips
FluentPenguin
What about the walking doe?
N0ticeablyFAT
So is fucking in a mascot costume; doesn't make it a cool thing to do.
Zoodpy
I would actually watch the Olympics if there was a mascot competition
thewhifflingtit
Rude. So few furries even do that, why bring it up?
CrapBaskets
That is the most awkward walk I have ever seen
Frizcapt
From an evolutionary perspective: we have a more efficient mode of travel with similar stride, it's called running. This wastes energy
wetfart92
I thought the most efficient mode of travel is skipping
Deiterhaman
My favorite title for this posted before was "when he nuts inside of you, walking to the can"
OldnSpicey
"...one foot must appear to be in contact with the ground at all times. This is assessed...common distances vary from 1.8 mi up to 62.1 mi"
pdxenburg
"appear"
OldnSpicey
Yeah, I had to condense the rules and shit. I guess the quicker you can move one foot while the other stays on the ground the better.
Maens
Looks like she's continuously dislocating her fucking leg, lmao.
helen8perrie
Yeah, they walk 7 or 7:30 minute miles though!
EinsteinsFitAsAFiddle
Took this as a PE course in college (only one that fit in my schedule) and can confirm, the "proper form" is hella awkward
Deiterhaman
Didn't know speed walking to the John full of dog water was a class anywhere
Deiterhaman
Define "proper form"
BecauseDogsDie
You always have to have a foot on the ground. To do that makes you walk weird
Deiterhaman
By proper, I meant for the perverts of imgur to explain how to walk after a guy nuts in you. It's like you two are moral!!!?
EinsteinsFitAsAFiddle
You're supposed to swing your hips and pump your arms like that. For reference, we were expected to do a mile in about 10 minutes.
Quessan
what's the reasoning behind keeping a foot on the ground?
EinsteinsFitAsAFiddle
I guess if you have two feet off then technically you're "jogging" which like cheating. Actually kinda difficult to keep from jogging
forgetthisnoise
Does it hurt your lower back and hips?
EinsteinsFitAsAFiddle
I dont remember having that problem but I did get shin splints a little bit.