KarenFromTheHOA
48941
1025
38
This is the story so far. I love the couch jokes and I hope you love them, too.
Aug 2, 2024 12:16 AM
KarenFromTheHOA
48941
1025
38
This is the story so far. I love the couch jokes and I hope you love them, too.
Hashbrown123
Germhole
TinyRavenFeathers
digitreal
Vance's couch may pull out, but he sure doesn't.
KarenFromTheHOA
Because children are the future
Whatdoyousaytoanicecupoftea
Raileks
runs on platform trying to ban birth control but gloves up when banging the upholstery. such a hypocrite.
OaksParcel
He'll turn that couch into a loveseat
MyPotatoHasAFirstName
Weird, creepy, dead-eyed couch fucker
UnattendedDeviant
Here's one for your collection.
koops
He needs to goto the sofa king store.
KarenFromTheHOA
Wikipedo
Not just weird, but Sofa King weird
UnattendedDeviant
Here's another
bildschoen
#17 Why IS there always loose money in the couch?
Because J D Vance always leaves a tip!
CrisprCAS
MeshHatMafia
The radical left is desperate enough to make this race about anything but the issues” says Vance…when really it’s just us chucklefucks making fun of him , when actually our paid politicians are making shit happen lol
DarthRastus
#15 That’s a nice couch.
PossumPoop
Elrohn
Small Hands and Couch Fucker.
Sounds like some Mexican tag team wrestling duo..
CityYeti
J.D. Vance did not have sex with a couch*
CityYeti
*Maybe
KarenFromTheHOA
Can't prove he did. Can't prove he didn't.
Blabulus
"Its not a white couch, but it has absorbent cushions and I love it anyway!"
OldBikerDude
KarenFromTheHOA
Chikun31
Why do people still use Twitter?
rainevasquez
I was an 11 yr old boy once. And I can confess without shame that I did indeed fuck the couch cushions. And not just once, many many times. It’s not an embarrassing story to me, and don’t see why it’d be to him. Then again, I’m not a douche bag like he is
memesis
You’d still make a better VP than Shady Vance
Remamian
I feel this way with anything sexual, American society makes fun of people with kinks of any kind. But realistically everyone has kinks, they are all valid, and we need to stop shaming people (Feet on gets it bad, for instance)
Chimpanzeezeetop
PokemonTrainerBrown
Is that the couch that they used to have at the Newport Beach Marriott Villas!?
Zzzinthevalley
He’s pretty weird
RoboUnicornFishBalls
pfshfine
I definitely stuck my dick between the couch cushions when I was around 13. Horny teenage boys will masturbate with all sorts of crazy shit. It's weird, but not unusual.
Wikipedo
I wouldn't, but he would (again)
iamdeadlol
Not without protection, I won't! I have standards.
RetiredPlumber
Ah yes, ScotchguardTM!
KarenFromTheHOA
Makes it easy to hide the evidence
jayman0123
chatawillybilly
JD's couch potato
imreallyjusthereforthecats
KarenFromTheHOA
imreallyjusthereforthecats
lddiaz
The fact that everyone thinks that; yeah, he seems weird enough to do something like that, says a lot.
chansuke
This guy's PR team must have loved waking up to a new alert that the AP pulled it's fact check about couch fucking because they couldn't prove your boss has never fucked a couch and it gets carried on major news orgs. Imagine getting called to a meeting where the only subject was couch fucking rumors.
KarenFromTheHOA
It's not even that weird as these things go. It's just funny to think about him trying to get good Christian votes with this story following him around. And yes, he does look like he could do it.
zubax
Say what you will about the left, but the right is light years behind the left when it comes to meme.
DancingSwine
Because to the right being funny = being cruel to someone
TheManWhoStaresAtTurtles
Or even having a sense of humor in general. The atrocities that dribble out the side of Donald Trump's head that his cultists excuse as "he was joking!" tells you they find that shit funny.
Calistrasza
"...to completion." He didn't say he didn't fuck a couch, just said he didn't finish.
Alistairetheblu
There's no way that's a legit statement they put out...right?
mithiwithi
Highly unlikely, if only because of the reason it's giving to disprove the purported IKEA accusation.
onlyawfulnamesleft
This generations "never inhaled", but so, so much weirder.
KarenFromTheHOA
He just pumped twice and then heard the door unlocking
Holzter
I've got a few to donate
Holzter
Holzter
Holzter