No where else to vent

I have just had it with life lately. Nothing ever goes my way, even a "vacation" lately was mostly just awful. One thing after another and I don't know how much more I can take, seriously. This will probably die in usersub but hopefully any responses I get will make me feel better.

TL;DR OP has the worst luck and needs to vent about shitty vacation/life.

At 34 years old I have experienced more loss than most people at this age. This year I lost my last living parent. Because of covid I couldn't even visit him in the nursing home for months before he passed nor was able to check in on his living conditions. I honestly think he was being neglected there. Even trying to find a mortuary and get him cremated was a whole ordeal in itself & very stressful. Because he was staying with me for a while before the nursing home I had to isolate myself for months because it would've been fatal for him if he did get covid. I hadn't seen most of my family & friends in over a year as I live hundreds of miles away from them, I know this is the case with lots of people as well so I know I'm not alone there. I recently had to pay for his cremation services and it was not cheap!
During this time I lost my job due to covid and couldn't find one until December 2020 where I took a lower paying job because I had/have no other options. I'm extremely underpaid but at least I have health insurance now. I went back on my antidepressants after not having health insurance for almost 2 years; I feel like it is not helping me like it did before and its been months now. I think I'm just in a worse place mentally and I don't know how to dig myself out.
So, first "vacation" since covid; I was invited to a girls trip. It's been 6 1/2 years since my mom passed away and I was invited by her best friends on their usual annual trip this year. They had said all these years they wanted to do something my siblings and me since my mom passed and this was the first time I was invited to something. All of these women have known each other most of their lives. This trip made me realize that 10 women is way too many for a vacation & I saw how fake some of these women really are. I took days off and I have no paid time off, I bought my flight to the area, bought a bunch of food to cook & share during the trip. I was so excited! Now I wish I didn't go & waste my money I need now...
The day of I busted my oil pan half a block away from my work taking a dip too fast & my car needs work.... Oil everywhere... cost me $800 to replace and install the new oil pan. Great. Get on my flight and head to the area.
I get to the airbnb to meet the ladies and the first day/night was actually very decent. It was nice catching up with the ladies. I had no idea the trip would go so bad after that. This trip was labeled as a river/lake & tubing trip. We all brought tubes and had matching shirts that said "floating on the river killing my liver." So, second day we were supposed to go to the "river" but because of the drought here in California it was too low for us to go in, so there were a couple lakes in the area and that was the back up plan. So the ladies decided instead to do something else that day without even asking me nor my best friend what we thought about the plan change. They were going to caverns in the area instead that had 260 stairs. I came with my best friend who has an injured knee and is disabled because of it and can't do stairs. So we could not go obviously. I let them know I was a little upset they were changing the plan but they assured me after the caverns they would meet us at the lake. I was fine with that plan, I wasn't expecting to spend all of our time together as one group anyways. So they get to the caverns and there are so many people they would have to wait for the 2:30 tour, they were there for the 11:30 tour. So all but 2 of them decided that they would wait for the caverns and ditch our plan of going to the lake. Fine... they promised we would go the next day... So, My bff, my godmother and my moms best friend went to the lake. It was an ordeal in itself because we were trying to fit the tubes (they drunkenly blew up all the tubes the night before- 10 tubes!!) inside the car. We realized this was not possible and we would have to take 2 cars at least. Then we realized a car was blocking my godmothers car, so we ditched the tubes and went without so we could all fit in 1 car. This took about an hour trying to get these tubes in and everything before we finally left.
Finally I was enjoying some nature. I live in the city and just needed some fresh air & beautiful views. We were there for a couple hours and then headed back to meet everyone for dinner. So apparently, everyone had other matching shirts in the same color except my bff and me. It was awkward being out in public being the only ones without the matching shirts & I was feeling left out, but this isn't the first nor will it be the last time that someone/people make me feel this way. I wasn't super upset about it at the time and didn't say anything except to my bff about it. Everyone reassures me that we are spending the day at the lake tomorrow. They wanted to go to a different lake because the one we went to was a little dirty/muddy. It was clear that something was up because most of these ladies didn't really care about catching up/talking with me. I mostly bonded with 3 of the 10 (other than my bff) the whole time.
Ok next day and I was expecting to go swimming again and hopefully using the tube I bought for this trip. The day of we find out there are tiny leeches in this other lake, so no one wants to go anymore and none of them want to go to the lake we went the previous day. Ok fine... I am just trying to hang out with these women I haven't seen much in over 6 years. I came there to hang with them.
Unfortunately... my moms best friend has really lost it over the years. She was pathologically lying even. Her mental health is in a bad state right now and it was awful to see. She is also one of the loudest, and I mean loudest, people I've ever met! My bff had a migraine due to the stress, high heat & humidity and this ladies loud voice for many hours. So while people are deciding what they want to do on this day I tell loud woman that my bff has a migraine still and if she's right next to her to just be cautious about volume. We were the only ones in the room and she immediately left to go outside to bitch to the other women that now she "can't be herself" around my bff and immediately thinks she has something against her now. She is so upset she doesn't even realize bff is sitting outside and hearing everything she is saying about her. Then one of the other ladies mentions that my bff is sitting right there. She continues to go on and on about it and she is the way she is and everyone just needs to accept it.... great. My bff calmly says that she has learned to advocate for herself and that her feelings are really hurt. While this is going on one of the ladies who is outside the group, she was brought in recently because she is one of the ladies ex sister in laws, leaves and tells the women sitting in the house that my bff is attacking loud woman (verbally)! So then they're talking shit about my bff... until my godmother comes in the house and corrects them on what actually happened and that it was completely the other way around. Because of this incident bff no longer wants to go out with the group. Very soon before this incident everyone decided to check out the small downtown area of the town we were staying in.... everyone had their floating on the river shirts on, even though it didn't apply, I thought that everyone wanted to match again. The 2 ladies who actually spent time with me that weekend convinced my friend to go and that we would separate from loud woman purposely "accidentally." We leave after everyone else left to head to the town. We show up and realize that EVERYONE had taken off their shirts except the 2 ladies that came with us. I was starting to get upset but didn't say anything while we were out... instead I decided to start pounding drinks instead because I have some bad coping skills. After checking out the area and eating dinner & drinks everyone decides to go back to the airbnb. On the way back one of the ladies who had been ignoring me most of the trip came back with us. Now I am already very blunt & honest but after drinking I really don't hold back. While we were waiting I let her know I was butt hurt about the shirt thing. They had left us out the day before and then that day everyone was wearing them and took them off before leaving. We didn't even get a picture with everyone wearing those matching shirts. She apologized at the time and said it was an oversight.... they had gotten the shirts before they invited us. I told them they could've let us know and we could've bought our own shirts, like the shirts we were currently wearing. Then, when we get back word gets around that I am upset about the shirts and now all of a sudden its a big deal that I'm upset and voicing my opinion about it. Half of the ladies decided to hide in their rooms the rest of the night. One of them apologized that night and didn't realize I came on the trip to hang with them, she assumed I would want to do my own thing..... like WTF! Why would I go to some tiny ass hoity toity town with nothing to do to hang out alone?? I had voiced my opinion the day before about about the plan change and that I came there to hang with all of them. So it's bullshit this was even a thought. The next morning we were leaving and multiple of them apologized to me before we left. I was so ready to get back home, I missed my cats (pictured above.) I had to change my flight from monday night to monday morning so I could come to work because my boss wouldn't give me that day off. So I took my flight super early and came straight to work. I was so tired, exhausted and mentally drained & hurt& I accidentally left my phone on the plane! Luckily they were able to find it after about 20 minutes of waiting and 2 people going to search. Made it to work late because of that.
This same week my bf and I were celebrating dating for 3 years and I was so mad I took time off to go on this shitty vacation when I could've taken the time off to spend with him. We have different days off and live over 60 miles away from each other, so we don't see each other very often, mostly just one night a week when I get home from work. He took off that next weekend so we could spend some real time together and we planned a day trip to Malibu, ca. Well the day comes and of course my cat (pictured right) is acting weird and is constantly trying to use the bathroom repeatedly and constantly, even on my bed. Meowing more deep than normal and I knew something was wrong. Her vet is closed that day so instead of going to Malibu we had to take her to the emergency vet 20 minutes away. I thought it was a UTI because she had one in the past so I paid for the urine test, ultrasound and vet fee. They then let me know that the tests say no infection but said they saw irregularities on her kidneys and wanted to do a blood test to see what was going on with her. So I paid for that and the blood test came back fine, her kidneys are not working 100% but working fine enough she doesn't need special food or treatment. They said that it could be a rare condition as her urine was too close to water and should've been more concentrated; or that her urinary tract was inflamed, as they cannot see that on an ultrasound. They suggested fluids and an anti inflammatory & for for me to monitor her water intake. Finally 3rd payment to them and it was over $700 total for her care. I really need to get pet insurance, I realized. She's older and they showed me her teeth and some are so bad they need to be removed and are causing her lots of discomfort. I feel awful, I can't afford that now. We spent 4 hours at the vet and were unable to make our day trip. We got back home and she was tired but acting JUST FINE NOW... They suggested it could even be a behavioral thing which shocked me because she's an angel. Its been 5 days and she's been acting her usual self with no bathroom issues.
I have the worst luck ever I swear. I can't even have fun ever. Nothing ever goes in my favor, my plan never works out. People treat me different and poorly because I'm fat, I know this is partially why I was treated so poorly on my "vacation." I wish I could call my mom.... I wish I had more family that actually cared. I'm so depressed I don't know what to do. I don't even think I have enough to pay rent after all of this.
I really just needed to vent, even if no one really cares, it wouldn't be out of the ordinary, maybe one person will. If you made it this far, wow. Thanks for caring and reading and I am open for messages too. I feel like I almost have no one to talk to other than my bf and bff.

Cat tax obvs.