NoRose
70942
1380
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Thanks to @berdwin for getting my parenting hacks started!
Feb 20, 2024 2:28 AM
NoRose
70942
1380
32
Thanks to @berdwin for getting my parenting hacks started!
dreyfusslugado
Now THAT is the right way to raise some kids!
Nonada
I've never understood the appeal of telling kids about Santa Claus, and I don't say that judgementally. I found out Santa wasn't real when I was in pre-school and it had literally no impact on me (which also made me the class asshole who told everyone that Santa was fake), but that's also why I don't understand this idea of lying that Santa's the one bringing gifts. Again, I'm not judging, but this is a very big cultural norm that I've never understood and I'm in my 30s now.
ExquisiteConundrum
My kiddo is 10, and they know Santa isn't real. But they still like to pretend. I'm sure this Christmas will be different. They start middle school in August and im sure all will be revealed and they will be too good for Santa. And I'll be sad.
shadolance
I sorta discovered the thrill of gift giving on my own. So much so, that it's now my love language, if you're into that phrasing. There are few things in life that compare to the feeling of finding the perfect gift for someone. It far exceed the joy of getting anything material.
Delerium1973
I imagined witch lady falling and breaking her leg in those slippers.
daytimepajamas
This is freaking genius.
r3dl8dy
Sigh. I wish I had read this a couple years ago.
grantbaines0
My kid was recently told at school that Santa wasn't real by the class asshole, he didn't really care. Turns out he was in it for the presents, not the delivery method
jursamaj
Are you thinking the rest of the kids aren't in it for the presents?
grantbaines0
I'm thinking it's not necessarily a blow that needs cushioning
cellfreeDNA
We’re about ready for this at my house. I love this approach.
SkamanSam
The wife and I decided 10 years ago we would do this when our kid starts questioning Santa. He just turned 10 this Christmas and I think he's ready. We will be talking with him this summer.
Raeilgunne
my parents always told me it was about the joy of it, but if your kid believes in a physical Santa, this is the way.
NCPBullet
My parents told me it was about fun. Then I ask but why lie? They say did you have fun? Well....yeah... "ok then let your sister keep having her fun this year, now you're part of the gift givers. And the let me pick out 2 gifts for my sister. One from me. And one from "santa" also me :)
RTK4740
I don’t know why but I’m bawling my eyes out.
NoRose
I love that we can preserve a bit of magic for kiddos without crushing them when they are old enough to learn that parents create memories out of myths. I didn't talk to my mom for DAYS when I found out she was Santa. This would have been so much more gentle. I had a good cry when I read this, as well.
Tonydemarco
I wish I read this before my kids figured it out in school from asshole kids in their grade
VodkaReindeer
I was ready to be the santa when mom offered me money to play one for my nephew.
Ymris
I preempted something like this...at the age of about like two or three, I apparently announced to my mother "I know who Santa really is! Santa Clause is everybody!"
vericon151
My theory is that Santa doesn’t have super fast travel or time manipulation anything like that… he has mind control.
drduffer
Favorited and, as is the tradition, upvoted. Loved the story and the thought. Now I wish I had little children again. ⬆️
RooGryphon
you better keep me away from kids... ill tell them the truth..... as i will not blatantly lie to a child they need to face reality sooner then later and its better to come from a family member but i will just blurt out facts if i hear them in public
DarkBusterBaron
Or you know let them enjoy their childhood.
RooGryphon
Then stop lying to kids. I will not. This is why we are currently here in terms of society. We have people who hano NO grasp of reality and that there are noconsequences. For ones actions.Why because we lied to them as kids
DarkBusterBaron
You're blaming an awful lot of problems on belief in Santa Claus when it's so much more complicated than that. It's a gross oversimplification and extremely disingenuous.
Revicus
If you're making decisions that require you to earnestly say "you better keep me away from kids," maybe it's time to start making different decisions. Also: "Not acting like a hostile weirdo around strangers' kids" and "not blatantly lying to a child" are completely compatible goals.
TooSoonOldTooLateSmart
Where is the upvote button?
Onlyhereforthelaughs
Had a thing like this at a former workplace. Ran into a coworker at the grocery store, and he had commented on how he spent too much. I knew he was semi-retired, and working this job as supplemental income. So while I was shopping, I grabbed a $20 gift card, and when he was away from his work station, slipped it into place so that he would see it. He was looking around, very confused as to where this gift card came from, and started asking everybody if they saw anything. -
Onlyhereforthelaughs
Nobody did. He had managed to ask everyone but me, which was good, because I am a terrible liar when face to face. But just as I was walking out the door, he called out to me, held up the card, and asked if I did that. ".....maybe?" and I bolted. When he caught up with me the next day, I explained why I did it, and while he appreciated it, he wasn't comfortable keeping it. But neither was I. So, we came up with a joint scheme. He would buy the gift card, and I would sneak it onto -
Onlyhereforthelaughs
a different coworker's station. I chose the single mom first. Then we hit up a couple others. I want to say we did five giftcards before the company started laying us off. He was really impressed by how quick and sneaky I was, so he called me Batman.
BumbleBeeBeardedGingerBear
I absolutely believe none of this. It is, in its entirety, a creative writing project pushing an idea. But i can respect the attempt made. My three year olds would see right through this, much less a seven year old, but its nice to consider adapting some version of this in concept.
jursamaj
I wouldn't be so sure. My sister's oldest kid got the fun of doing all the Santa stuff with her mom. I know they were doing that in her teens. Not sure how they made the transition, but I could see it being something like this.
BumbleBeeBeardedGingerBear
Teens i can see them having the patience, but this parenting advice writing prompt includes all the cliches. 1. Children who listen to long speeches (aka unicorns.) 2. An amorphous number of children theyve done this with (when my kids, who totally exist, turn 6 or 7.) 3. Neighbors that fit super tropes (the witch lady who-idk-doesnt let the kids retrieve their like frisbees and stuff from her yard.)
JockoV
Thank you. The mean old neighbor lady trope sounded very (r/thathappened). Nice sentiment though.
BumbleBeeBeardedGingerBear
Exactly!
Frostycopper
We just never pretended Santa was a real person.
[deleted]
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Frostycopper
It is an amalgamation of several historical and fictional characters.
Raeilgunne
yeah, my parents always gave me one 'santa' gift that was the fun thing, but it was always about the joy of it, not the big man himself.
Crazyaussiecanadian
I get that it's not a popular opinion, but I really hate lying to my kids. At all, ever. Yeah, I'm probably a little autistic. Worked well for us though. Never told the kids Santa was real, never had to tell them I'd been lying.
thetonestarr
Generally speaking, same - except for the Tooth Fairy. We ran with that one, then when she lost her last tooth, we revealed that I was her Tooth Fairy the whole time
PandAnomoly
Grew up in an Asian household, never had to be told he wasnt real cus our parents never knew what to say about him (being immigrants helped keep realism in place) besides always be grateful for what you received. It actually lead to an abashed annoyance at all things Christmas: our family restaurant would get busy but people would be more picky and angry and tip less. We learned not to quite get caught up in the capitalism of it all since it generally sucked in the service industry.
NergalJester
This is what I wanted to do and my entire extended family convinced my wife I was an idiot for it.
Now I've got an autistic 9 year old getting in arguments at school because they believe a magic fat guy is more responsible for their Christmas joy than I am.
flyingmonkeystick
The second best time is now. He’s either going to eventually realise (and who know how that will go if he’s still not able to connect the dots yet) or will keep on believing, which is also not good. Better to do it yourself in a kind, understanding way.
Foxsayy
I like that approach best. I wonder if Santa primes a child to believe in superstition, like religion.
My parents didn't do Santa so that we wouldn't think "hey, maybe Jesus is a joke too." Needless to say, It didn't work out like they planned.
lapus
I'm 48, I have never had the talk about Santa. I think it is all about presentation. It's not setting them up to believe in Jesus, because I stopped believing in him and Santa about the same time.
LadyTaylor
Imo if you teach kids about Santa, you have to follow it up in the future with the "humanity needs the little lies to believe the big fair" speech. Teach them about superstition and the like from a scientific lens, and use the Santa transition as an example of that. Otoh not teaching them Santa's real works if you want to raise your kid to take the world from a more grounded perspective. Fallen angel or rising ape, which side does one want their kid on?
Foxsayy
I could see that. Getting religion ripped out from under my feet was an experience. If that were the case, I would try to get them to discover it on their own, and when it hit them like a sack of bricks, I'd lead them to examine why they believed it in the first place, and how society enforced the lie for them.
Maybe it's a good thing I'm not a parent. They'd be like "Mrs. Deborah I've been standing behind you for 5 minutes and so I don't think you do have eyes in the back of your head." 😅
erinaceus
i think lying to children for your own amusement is always a bad idea.
MatrimBloodyCauthon
https://www.biography.com/religious-figures/saint-nicholas : ) Santa is real!
starhewn
Country I lived in when I was a kid was super catholic, and so, about 60/70% of the time it wasn't Santa that brought gifts, but 'baby Jesus'. That made me very suspicious ofc... how can a BABY deliver all the gifts?
Neurisko
Yes, it's much more realistic that an old man could deliver gifts to the entire world in one night instead of a little baby. That was sharp thinking.
starhewn
tbf as a kid one has no concept of the ravages of age. On the other hand, babies are observably useless.
Frostycopper
A baby would not have the reach to fill stockings
NergalJester
But it's baby Jesus, he can fly with his God Magic.