TheOleWeenus
43722
5259
81
Apr 28, 2013 12:12 AM
TheOleWeenus
43722
5259
81
AVerySexualMidget
Who. Who the hell has been watching me. For the record, all of these have perfectly good reasoning, which is 'fuck it'.
Powerpal2015
I think "fuck it" works mostly with the last one.
wompwompwomp
Beauty takes a lost of god damn time and effort. It doesn't take a long period of sexlessness for it all to feel futile. I say efficient.
Chucklefruit
As a man.. I feel very oatmeal about this.
OutForBrains
Reading the truth hurts a little bit.
thatslovely
Really? I felt a wave of relief knowing I'm not alone in the struggle!
TheOleWeenus
At least we know we're not alone
whatacompletejoke
When I lived alone, I kept a robe by the door and stayed naked all the time. Less laundry to do...
ImTheWalrus
That sounds like heaven.
thatslovely
You're a smart one.
TheyHidInTheDayAndAteGuavas
Oh my gosh, I do that!
tentsie
Are you a genius? Here I am, wearing clothes like a barbarian D:
whatacompletejoke
say "OH! I was just stepping into the shower," to explain the robe). 2/2
HeartCondition
THESE HAVE TAUGHT ME THERE IS NOTHING ORIGINAL ABOUT ME
pumunk
I THOUGHT I WAS BEING EFFICIENT BY STRIPPING ON THE TOILET.
Twobirdsonestonebullseye
Yeah, what's wrong with that?!
WhoIsTheDodie
I'm the first one home n have get dinner ready time is a luxury. N being nakey for a few mins before everyone gets home is pretty schweet.
TrapperJohnsOldLady
I KNOW, RIGHT!?!
FisterMantastic
I'll admit that it sounds pretty damn efficient.
SweetSigns1787
You ARE being efficient. You are.
Toxicempanada
Me too! I have a 3 hour commute so I always have to pee real bad and I hate wearing pants/shoes at home. How is that scumbaggy?!
PastaIsLife
As a dude, jeans really do never get dirty.
th3kingslay3r
Isn't that the fucking truth brother!
modifiednerd
According to my fiancé, this is really true.
biffoboffo
You are the male counterpart!!
KnathanTheKnight
They still get dirty from your own sweat, hair, and skin. You shed 30-40k skin cells every hour. :P
KnathanTheKnight
http://health.howstuffworks.com/skin-care/information/anatomy/shed-skin-cells.htm
ImVeronicaCorningstone
I have enough underwear that I could go without doing underwear laundry for approximately 2 months and wear a new pair every day
TheOleWeenus
You must be very proud
ImVeronicaCorningstone
It's one of the only cool things I can say about myself so yeah
MrsMonkey
I collect underwear but I don't know why. I wear the same favorites all the time. So I just have a bunch of newish ones taking up space.
sheblindedmewithscience
I do too, and I literally just bought new underwear for the aforementioned reason. That's what happens when you have to pay for laundry...
ChapsHannigan
I have about 3 months worth, and I do the same thing. I despise doing laundry, especially when I have to pay for it!
GoAvadaKedavraYourself
ls it bad l relate to all of these? Well except l usually use toothpick to clean my nails.
TheOleWeenus
I often use a pen cap to clean mine
ACatNamedVirtute
I'm a guy, but I use a screwdriver so a toothpick isn't all that weird to me.
randocommand
i use tweezers. and i also use those tweezers for other embarrassing things that i am not willing to admit.
weesmithy
I use folded business cards. Mostly because I compulsively collect business cards that I have no need for.
Annikizzle
Reading these has caused me to re-evaluate my life.
Supernerdtastic
So you can change to meet some unspoken expectation of society? If I cared to begin with, these habits would never develop.
Annikizzle
Nah, because I used to think I was the only one who did these things. It feels go to know others do them too, haha.
NurseFeelgood
I'm just going to put this earring away now...
SoonerbeerSnob
My wife is guilty of the 2nd one. Its like the walls are growing hair.
mremaknu
It beats letting the hair run down and clog the drain.
beathelas
About that last one.. I'll let it slide.
bobbi21
As a single guy, I don't care if you didn't shave if you'd say yes to my sexual advances.
dontbeadebbydownvoter
I feel like people watch me in my natural habitat and make memes about me.
TheyHidInTheDayAndAteGuavas
:( Yeah, I'm used to this now
acidjuicemotel
Do.. do girls really do that last thing? Am I missing out on all these honeys b/c none of them shaved?
TheyHidInTheDayAndAteGuavas
Yes, please signal intent in future, so we are ready
somerandomgirl
Speaking for all of my single female friends, a LOT of the girls who commented here, and myself: Yep, more often than you'd think.
iknowumad
My girlfriend does all this and I could never care. And she's a nurse so I couldn't gross her out if I tried.
maggiethecat
New undies MUST be washed before wearing- some sweatshop worker in a soapless country was probably last to touch them prior to (cont)
maggiethecat
shipping, or they were handled in-store by who knows who, or (the worst scenario!) they might have been TRIED ON by multiple shoppers... ICK
sheblindedmewithscience
Yep. I wash my new undies because of this. For the same reason, I also don't try them on at the store to be kind to future buyers.
UggMcBugg
I'm so scared because this IS me. I never realised how disgusting I was until someone wrote it down.
birdiebridget
You aren't disgusting, because if you are disgusting then I am disgusting, and I refuse to accept that. Let us revel in our disgustingness!
UggMcBugg
okay. we're not disgusting. Just happy. like this : http://fromatovegan.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/atovegan_poplar_pig6.jpg
ChiefClancyWiggum
The point of the snack is that the huge feast won't be ready for at least another hour!
IWonderWhereIPutMyStuffSoIMustBeWonderWoman
No more clean underwear? Turn them inside out.
TheHardestArtery
Like Lister of Red Dwarf!
sheblindedmewithscience
Yeahhhhhh. I do that. Yikes.
TheNextBestUsername
And the jeans, they're still in the "never gets dirty" category at this point, yes?
HobbitHouse
I considered this this weekend when forgot to pack them for a trip...rejected it.
miasanmia
RE: the last one - if a guy like you enough to make sexual advances, he not going to let a little fuzz put him off.
skellious
from a guy - exactly, in fact some of us prefer it.
miasanmia
I'm not a guy but I know prefer it in my partners of either gender.
miasanmia
And if he does, it's a good sign he's probably a bit of an asshole, so no loss.
TheyHidInTheDayAndAteGuavas
But you won't know till you're there, naked.
takedatbabydatbabyaintmine
As a guy, I don't give a fuck if you shaved.
sometimetowaste
I love you
ellocin
theneworigional
or if its period time.
paranoidandroid2107
I have no idea why you were downvoted but take my upvote.
wronggengirl
thank you! Its like wtf do you want me to do, STOP having a period? I'm sorry you find it gross, but wtf do you expect me to do? +1!
Nerdyohyoumeanawesome
My hero! haha
chivmuffin
As a guy, there are some of these which apply to me as well...
skellious
as another guy, I absolutely agree. I find hairless women weird. we grow hair naturally, so shaving it all off seems strange to me.
WhoIsTheDodie
So u like furry legs, got it
wronggengirl
I had one guy tell me he won't sleep with/fuck a woman who isn't shaved. (I do, but he was just giving me an fyi I guess?)
TheyHidInTheDayAndAteGuavas
Lies
marshizzle1
As a freshman in college who lost all of her shit that was once together, YES, AND I NEED HELP.
geonerd
This is exactly how the 'freshman 15' happens.
JustASmallTownMinnesotanImgurlLivingInALonelyWorld
............... this is why I'm single.
GetOffMyLawnYa
No. None of these matter.
lpulicefarrow3
Lost my shit at the last one
veronicamarsdestroyerofworlds
So horribly accurate. I have missed out on several excellent hookups because of yeti resemblance
spiritussancto
SO TOTALLY TRUE! letting someone see me unkempt is a relationship trust milestone
TheEllipsisQueen
it's so damn true. Some days I think "should I? Just in case?" but then I think "nah... I'm too fucking lazy today."
allygator777
you might want to go find it
Supahotfire
Yeah as a guy I'm usually too happy that I'm having sex to care
Tamster
Men, if you think you're in and she pulls away -don't be upset. This is quite often the reason.
spacecowboyein
ugh, i don't know if the last one makes me feel better or worse about my rejections. if they'd said something i woulda told them i dont care
MisterNoGo
inorite
werwerwere
It doesn't mean that it never will happen though! It probably will next time when she's better prepared ;)
iamireland
I was thinking the very same thing, but a woman has to be comfortable with herself naked, it's not all about your feelings on it.
TheOleWeenus
I, too, am Ireland
itsawerewolfbarmitzvah
Sir you are a gentleman and a scholar and I can't upvote you enough.
fletcherhonorama
YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAIRY MY LEGS ARE! most dudes don't have this much leg hair.
jesii
i think you underestimate how much i dont care about body hair.
ItDoesNotDoToDwellOnDreams
I love guys that don't care about body hair. They are the best. Not that I don't try to keep it in check anyway. But it's good to know.
jesii
yea man, all i care about is if its actually clean. if it is, good to go.
opad
Many of us wouldn't really believe and fear you'd laugh after
hailthefish
Eh, my boobs sweat enough that I prefer to wash my bras fairly often. Which sucks because I have one that's actually comfy... :(
anitabieror6
Yes! I had a friend who put anti perspirant under her boobs. Im paranoid about breast cancer otherwise it seems like a great idea
iaccidentallybuiltafirewhileiwassleepwalking
You can just put some deodorant powder instead, if you're worried! (my friend has big boobies, and that's what she uses during summer)
ScootyBoots
Foul Bachelorette Frog describes my ideal woman. I want to make un-showered love to her on a pile of our dirty laundry.
catnapz
Here I am.
ellocin
hailthefish
So, uh.. want my number?
K0R0I0Z
+1 to you ScootyBoots, do the nasty with the dirty!
Ellelouise
Hi.
AnaemicRoyalty
Hit me up. haha
th3kingslay3r
Imagine the smell of that room afterwards! DOESN'T MATTER HAD SEX!!
JacksCompleteLackOfAUsername
How you doin'?
RIPSlurmsMckenzie
In all seriousness that's what I am looking for too. But more of the I want a girl with natural beauty IE w/o makeup.
DorfFortress
Yes, I know I'm a horrible person for sticking my hair to the shower wall.
fauxsquirrelcoats
i think this is the logical thing.
monicarasaurus
I'm not alone?!!? Ohhhh I like that this is a thing and I'm not weird.
apotatochip
what I wouldn't give to have a girl around to be sticking her hair to the shower wall
vanner
I am 1000000% more impressed by your name. BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
DorfFortress
SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!
vanner
Armok grant you many mugs of Prickle Berry Wine, and hordes of ripe, puny elves to slaughter! Granted you not drown everyone first.
brbabiding
as a long hair guy, i wish my hair stuck to the wall instead of clogging the fucking drain. my roommate hates me.
GulDukatja
It will if you stick it to the wall instead of rinsing it off. As long as it's wet, you can stick it.
brbabiding
picture me rubbing my head against the shower wall before rinsing
GulDukatja
You get hair stuck to your hands after you shampoo, right? Put *that* on the wall. Don't rub your head on it. Funny image, though.
TheOleWeenus
It has to be done
DorfFortress
I'm glad someone understands.
TheOleWeenus
Me too, me too.
emilymr27
i mean, as long as you clean it off post-shower... what else are you supposed to do with it?>!?
weesmithy
Nah, as long as you do the fun swirly-swipe at the end to ball it up and toss it. I love the swirly-swipe.
hette
Blaaaaccch. How is it possible to enjoy fishing gross hair out of a drain?
weesmithy
No no no, the swirly-swipe is to get it off the wall, where you stick the hair so it DOESN'T go in the drain!
weesmithy
(I hope this never gets quoted out of context. It just looks...wrong.)
Supernerdtastic
brb printscreeening to post to reddit. 8DDD
weesmithy
NOOOOOOOOOO! (Oh my god, I'm going to be SO internet famous!)
ILikeAnimalCrackersWithApplesauce
I DO THIS TOO
apella
As a man who used to have long hair: this.
ImVeronicaCorningstone
the sticking to the wall isn't the bad part....it's the not cleaning it off afterwards that makes me cringe!!!
cosmonautkoala
My roommate and I get into fights about this all the time. She ALWAYS leaves it on the shower wall and leaves it there -___-
GetOffMyLawnYa
Use her toothbrush to clean it.
cosmonautkoala
Oooooooooooohhhhhhh you brilliant, evil, genius
ImVeronicaCorningstone
my roommate has DARK brown hair and she does this too....I'm blonde so it's hard to see but I also DON'T DO THIS!
cosmonautkoala
I have dark brown hair and my roommate has purple hair...she always tries to blame me for the hair when it's clearly her -____-
lmhx
If you don't stick it to the wall, it will clog the drain!
HobbitHouse
this. i have to think about this.... nope, still better to just occasionally unclog drain.
DorfFortress
Exactly!
DorfFortress
Also I noticed this morning my toenail polish is still there, I don't even remember when I painted them any more.
ItDoesNotDoToDwellOnDreams
Three months was an understatement. Try like six. Maybe my nails grow slowly...
DorfFortress
December, I think?
holyshnikes
I only have toenail polish left of my big toenails. Just the top half is left....I got a pedi right before Christmas. *sigh*
WhoIsTheDodie
Then comes the night you can no longer add another coat n u have chip off all 6 layers.
GalacticPussy
why does toe polish last FOREVER!? It's a phenomenon
DorfFortress
Yeah, I've always wondered how it stays on forever, yet I put it on my fingers and it scratches off within a day.
Supernerdtastic
If you dont have carpet in your house & wear flippies more, nothing is really hitting the nail to chip it. ^^
DorfFortress
I have carpet, and wear socks and shoes, yet it persists.
emilymr27
i feel like my sneakers preserve my toe nail polish.
Supernerdtastic
Jesus. This is the girliest convo I've had in ages. D:
Supernerdtastic
Really? I notice mine chipped more when I wore shoes. xD
shortkitty
I have carpet and wear socks and boots basically every day, yet the toe polish still lives!
TrixieFox
My big toes have been painted since I got married... last october.
breadstickez
Mine is still on from November. And the paint from November was painted over the remaining paint from my HS graduation last June.
kittymack
I paint my toe nails and finger nails twice a week - it's my obsession!
Aymack
As a man that pays extra attention to girls' feet, I strongly respect that :p