Seagulls, peck at my head

Something really, really bad happened to me on the same day that I went to see Episode 8 with some friends. That was the only connection, but it was enough that every time I saw Star Wars anything I was right back in that moment for a bit (triggers can be really fucking lousy and outwardly nonsensical like that, it sucks). I've had to steer clear of Imgur on May 4th since then, but there's no way to avoid ever stumbling across references to an IP that popular short of, I dunno, cutting myself off from society and going to live in the woods.

At some point I stumbled across a post on here of Seagulls! (Stop It Now) that I forced myself to watch through as part of my efforts to desensitize that association, and it was memorably the first reference to Star Wars since what happened that brought me anything but a crushing feeling of disassociated emptiness. It was just... too stupid and funny to watch without cracking a little smile. Ever since then when that trigger has activated, I look that video up and watch it again, and it helps me shake it off.

Today I was getting ready to count myself out of the internet for the next 24 hours like normal and I realized that it just doesn't hurt like it used to. Some combination of getting some distance and closure to that day, getting a slow drip of exposure therapy from the odd meme on here, and forging this new association have finally let me reclaim that trigger. SW just doesn't send me to that dark place anymore, and the sense of relief is incredible.

Really, sincerely- thanks.

For the uninitiated- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U9t-slLl30E