Today is my cakeday.

Jan 5, 2017 2:36 AM

DrinkBootySweat

Views

84707

Likes

1675

Dislikes

154

How Pete became a legend.

Repost. Don't know why, but this is never not funny to me.

funny

No cake for you

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

haha, this was hillarious

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

dudes got a smokin hot wife

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

@ISeeNipple

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Classic Pete.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'd fuck him. I'm a straight man. But yeah. Get in here.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Elastic Snap-Hole of the Love Bear

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I've always assumed Pete was actually ex Bears/Broncos QB Kyle Orton. http://www.dolfansnyc.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/qb-orton.jpg

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

The scar looking thing on his left (our right) cheek definitely matches the photos I've seen of Kyle Orton

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Googled his height. He's 6' 4"... Google doesn't mention it being two measurements though.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Might need to update his Wikipedia page.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Put your thumb over his eyes.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Pete is my fucking spirit animal.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I freaking died at two measurements.

9 years ago | Likes 106 Dislikes 4

Yet were able to type a comment. If we were playing "Guess Who" I'd say you're Frankenstein's monster!

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 2

hello pete. happy cakeday

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

He has a hot wife who likes to drink. She just might be worth putting up with Pete for.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

No one gonna mention the epic photo?

9 years ago | Likes 56 Dislikes 0

I feel like I've seen him somewhere before...

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Make love to me Pete, please!

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

*concern*

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I strive for this level of excellence...

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

TAKE ME!!!

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

He's a keeper

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

v

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Could be a midget with a huge dick

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You can still get around with a 4-banger. So I hear.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Is that Pete Rudd, Paul Rudd's brother?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Man, Sesame Street has changed.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The amount of sex this guy has on regular basis... Mind boggling.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Plug your damn phone in Pete.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

This is a screenshot from a person viewing Petes profile posted to a separate website.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The last line makes this whole thing

9 years ago | Likes 388 Dislikes 3

I show this to all I work with. Love it.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

v

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I am 37 years old and 6 seconds. Those are two measurements

9 years ago | Likes 81 Dislikes 2

Wow! A tiny man with a 6 foot penis! This I have to see.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Does it make your whole week?...

9 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 1

8in shy of a foot into my week

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

How about your hole weak?

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

I don't get it.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Or is there no joke, and he's 6 foot tall and 4 inches long, and just stating the obvious for comedic effect?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

I'm very sure it's a dick joke. 6 foot for height + 4 inch for the Wang= 2 measurements

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

[deleted]

[deleted]

9 years ago (deleted Oct 21, 2024 11:33 PM) | Likes 0 Dislikes 0

Which I also said hours before you figured it out

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Never mind, I got it now (Without stating that it was 2 measurements, one would think that '6 foot & 4 inches' (6' 4") is one measurement.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I never saw it that way, thought it was two measurements from the start, so last sentence seemed oddly Captain Obvious to me.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

*walks away, silently murmuring "Silly Americans and their silly Imperial... So salty..."*

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0