avanishprajapati
397333
10111
227
May 6, 2017 3:48 PM
avanishprajapati
397333
10111
227
Sagromus
Nice thoughts!
hopethisisarelevantname
Agreed...although when I'm in the shower I usually think "is that too much shampoo?"
infiniteblurs
Could have lived without the "over 30" ones :(
WirenutsInYourButts
The sharing a meal with a stranger one is a very pleasant thought :)
Inmydayimgurwaspronouncedimgur
That's the one I don't get ...
KillingGod
That's why I buy a full Chicken and throw half away. My anti social behaviors are far too advanced for you, Human.
FerrousBuehler
For thought number 1, many of those tribes know people are out there but wish to not be contacted. Then we do anyways and they get sick
MaggGyver
Check out the stories of the people of North Sentinel Island, in the Indian Ocean. Considered the most isolated group on Earth.
photog
https://youtu.be/MMhMov-1VqU
Eichimaru
That was amazing. Thank you!
AkiyamaRuss
I always wondered if that "Do not contact" tick box actually worked.
FairyGodzilla
Probably works about as well as the do not call list
TheActualDonKnotts
Some Shower Thoughts: "I should wash my butt crack again. Just to be sure."
StonesOnTheHill
#6 I'm afraid of being alone in the woods. Imagine tripping, falling, blood spouting out some wound, and even if you can call for help (1/2)
viila
Yeah. In the wilderness other people are just about the last thing that I'm afraid of.
rollercostarican
rub some dirt on it
StonesOnTheHill
You know chances are slim that anyone can assist you, or even find you. (2/2)
[deleted]
[deleted]
[deleted]
[deleted]
fregeek
That's what happened to a friend :(. Went climbing alone, fell, broke neck. Died 2 days later few hrs before being found.
exponant
I have done several solo backpacking trips. I have added a mirror to my 1st aid kit.
Whilo
Instagramming your food is just pressing a button compared to actually paibting every stroke.
cousteau
Making your phone the actual artist. Instagrammers are just patrons.
miserableprincess
as for the time travel one, its easier in the past to change the present because you'd know exactly what action to take.
RustyNeX
Hindsight is a wonderful thing
OobedoobScoobyDoobyBenubi
#3 you can't "change" the future, you can't change something that hasn't happened yet. Whatever route it takes was the only possible outcome
creepwood
#11
one of the perks of not reproducing
RideTheStimutacs
Coffee is more like coffee-infused water, not just "coffee flavored".
cousteau
What about instant coffee?
CaptainADHD
#9- There's actually a webcomic that explores this idea pretty thoroughly. See Dr. McNinja Issue 8: Punch Dracula.
Csel
I love later Dracula saves Earth's timeline with his Moon Laser, he didnt the first time because no one asked, "they usually hate the laser"
ivm4
#1 So, like aliens' Prime Directive.
Mithi
More a question of hygiene. You don't touch something that you know to be highly infectious.
jeandolly
"Stay away, this planet has a bad case of humans !"
Mithi
Even worse, they are thinking meat! http://www.terrybisson.com/page6/page6.html
Quilboar
better than a king? my standard of living is only good if i have slaves and armed men at my command.
Noughmad
Yeah, that one is very subjective. Yes, I have TV and a car and better food, but they had castles and servants.
Whiteoaks
If coffee is only water with coffee taste then shower thoughts are just coffeeless flavoured indoor rain relfections.
Skippeh
#1 = the zoo hypothesis
YarTheBug
kgbofficer
Just now picturing someone at a bonfire standing in place just slowly spinning rotisserie style while everyone else is having a good time.
MrWoodchip
I've done this in the past. It was cold and I'd just gotten there.
YarTheBug
You need a lovely companion "moon" to keep you company and co-rotate.
ImScOtTmAlKiNsOnAnDIGoTdIaBeTeS
This comment just made my night bud! +1
YarTheBug
Happy to oblige. How you find your moon for the night or month or life! :D
IWishIWereNotAllergicToCats
#2 that's not what farming means.
smallskillerofhambino
The strangers in cars thing makes no sense. I know OP is referring to Uber, Lyft, etc but people were taking taxis long before them.
Showmeyourotters
Right like as kids we were told not to get into strangers' cars bc we weren't old enough to be doing stuff and making decisions w/o parents
hopethisisarelevantname
Also, children can't always defend themselves as well as adults can.
ChillaAquila
I was in an Uber and the driver had a bowl of mints in the centre console. I've only just realised the significance of it...
LosPer
Taxis are licensed by the government...doesn't mean much, but someone has checked them out and has their name and number.
gabiinunderland
IIRC a background check being done on me when I started lyfting. As well as my entire driving history. I could be misremembering
LosPer
they say they do that. But it's not the same as government licensing.
smallskillerofhambino
Fair point.
EccentricNimoy
#8, One must master painting the taut naked white lobes of apples before moving on to live models :P
METAAAAAAAAAL
And that's the reason the sky is below me? Nice to know.
EccentricNimoy
SMH, I meant #7 lol
EccentricNimoy
#7, oops
RoutemasterFlash
Pretty sure you can't "change" something that hasn't happened yet.
Flyms
But you can change the difference between your prediction of the future and the present (which will be the future)
RoutemasterFlash
True, but who's to say your prediction was correct anyway?
Flyms
You try to make it correct. Most people try to change their predictions while some people try to mostly change the world. Thats the 1/2
Flyms
difference between artists /engineers /creators and scientists.
CaptainADHD
#7- A still life paintings actually originated as a deep meditation on the nature of life and representation within art.
Wicyaer
make up whatever bullshit you want still life food paintings are still just renaissance Instagram.
FraudulentPepsi
So...like instagram?
TheFamousNecromancerMrBones
Messi definitely wouldn't be a normal guy. He's highly competitive with the physiology to be an incredible athlete. He would have done
TheFamousNecromancerMrBones
Something similar at the very least. Every world famous athlete is literally different from a normal person at a cellular level.
TheFamousNecromancerMrBones
Higher percentage of type 1 muscle fibers, better lactate and H+ ion clearance, more room to lower diastolic bp, it's just facts.
dildobiscuit
Messi's physiology was flawed. Had a growth hormone deficiency growing up. Signing to Barcelona academy allowed him to get treatment.
TheFamousNecromancerMrBones
His GHD would not have affected his percentage of type 1 muscle fibers, nor would it have pit him at a disadvantage in soccer where a lower
dildobiscuit
He came from a poor family. Hadn't hit puberty when his teammates had. Was tiny. He needed treatment. Football allowed him to get it.
TheFamousNecromancerMrBones
Center of gravity is beneficial. It actually potentially allowed him to play better as a result.
dildobiscuit
If he didn't get treatment he wouldn't have been an athlete. Do some research mate. It's well documented.
CaptainADHD
#17- Just fuck you right to hell, buddy.
Moshugaani
I'm turning 30 in a couple of months. #17 caught me off guard. :<
HippyMama86
This one fucked with me.
theHUNGERian
Telescopes without mirrors exist.
ICouldntComeUpWithAGoodName
I like your name... Makes me quite Hungary.
theHUNGERian
I am a Hungarian and I must have been hungry when creating my username.
cousteau
But they're not powerful enough to spot space vampires.
merelyadequategooglymoogly
...for a reason.
ExpectedDickbuttGotDickbutt
How Can Mirrors Be Real If Our Eyes Aren't Real?
pomegranatearmageddon
https://xkcd.com/1791
nanman
StunnedGoofy
Existence telescopes without mirrors.
MostIndeedlySo
So, our eyes are real? Or aren't real?
iwaswasdoingfinelurking
Space telescopes are reflective type.......lenses can't be used in Hubble telescope
SiegwardOfCatarina
And Venus is within our planets goldilocks zone.
astrangehop
I remember there was a choose your own adventure book with a venusian vampire...
n8crafter
yeah, but venus is also wearing a winter coat
rrlyrae
that's why i get annoyed when someone announces another 'earth' in other solar systems. from the data, it could be another venus.
Jeddaven
Those are meant to be planets that have a high chance of being similar to Earth or amiable to the formation of life.
Debauchery
Venus is a hellscape last time I checked. There's no way in heck it's going to be even close to habitable. At least for now
SiegwardOfCatarina
Never said it was habitable but it's within the zone where liquid water could exist. Unfortunately a runaway greenhouse effect nuked it 1st
Mitchz95
So is Mars. Hopefully someday we can terraform one or both of them.
10tacles
We don't need to terraform Venus. The temperature and pressure in the upper layers of the atmosphere are pretty good and since it have a
10tacles
dense atmosphere we could set floating colonies there Entire floating cities with their own atmosphere isolated from the planet atmosphere.
SiegwardOfCatarina
The problem is any resource we'd need we would have to bring. The surface isn't reachable.
tornbetweenscyllaandcovfefe
I doubt it. Mars' atmosphere is too thin and Venus' atmosphere is too toxic.
YamatoIouko
Mars and Venus both have super-weak magnetic fields; that's actually why Mars' is thin and Venus' is so toxic.
Mitchz95
Right now, sure. But give us a couple centuries and we might just have the technology and infrastructure to pull it off.
ThePizzaGuyOfJustice
Mars would be significantly easier than Venus. Easier to add atmosphere than remove it
Flyndaran
Mars has more than enough water and gravity to hold onto an atmosphere for millions of years if we heated it up and gave it enough comets.
swinglinered
Mars could hold an atmosphere for a long time. Crash a bunch of water comets/asteroids into it, give it a heat trap layer/space mirrors...
Bliss412
If people can survive in LoL, they can find a way on Venus.
Radix865
Venus has other serious problems that are very hard to fix even if it was terraformed, like rotation rate of 243 days.
Rangrok
They're being phased out though. It's harder to control the imperfections inside lenses, compared to the surface of mirrors.
ImScienceGuy
It's not just because it is harder to control imperfections, but also because lenses have dispersion, and mirrors do not
theHUNGERian
China and Japan are pumping out high quality refractors with no end in sight. Astrophysics, TEC, and Televue are still going strong.
Rangrok
True, but I meant the most expensive long-range telescopes almost never use refractors, especially when looking at non-visible wavelengths.
theHUNGERian
Ah, agreed! I was thinking of the consumer market. For research, nobody would build a refractor.
YamatoIouko
Wait. Are most people on here NOT interested in them for research purposes? >.>
planetfinder
Yeah but refractors suck.
rrlyrae
not when you're looking for space vampires.
theHUNGERian
https://cdn.meme.am/cache/instances/folder596/500x/9158596/dwight-schrute-false.jpg
planetfinder
High chromatic abberation, high cost, short lifetime, for anything bigger than 2" reflectors are better
theHUNGERian
Have you ever scanned the Milkyway with a 4" flatfield apo + 31mm Nagler? It changes you, man.
YamatoIouko
I see your four-incher and raise you the Hard Labor Creek Observatory in Rutledge, Georgia.
theHUNGERian
... also, I'm not saying that reflectors suck.
theHUNGERian
And if you do photography, reflectors have diffraction spikes. Some love 'em, I dislike 'em, so I have a refractor (and an 11" SCT).
YamatoIouko
Do photography? That's like...the thing where you combine the red, blue and green-filter passes into one image, right?
TheHeathLedger
#4 Step 1: Rob a bank
picardsaysengayge
Run, Lola!!!
DesmondDodger
VirtualNaut
Step 2: As a manager at the bank claims the robbers stole more than they actually did.
Shardikprime
Motherfucker thats called a JOB!!
wildcatfan4life
One step solution: Find Big foot bring him in alive.
imhoots
Profit!
cousteau
Step 2: avoid police's bullets in this order.
Startrekker95
Up, up, down, down, left, right
viila
left, right, B, A
LehdaRi
Invest in next Facebook.
DrunkSnowWhite
Step 1: Cut a hole in a box
MAYORofTITTYciti
Step 3 profit
FajitaPrinceofAllMexicans
This reminds me how I was talking to myself how it's entirely possible to invent a new, harmless form of energy to revolutionize humanity1/2
FajitaPrinceofAllMexicans
but the only reason we're stopped, any of us are, we don't know the blueprints, but if we knew -how- we could do it in a garage. 2/2
RamiHu12
There is not much real money in cash (or gold, silver). Money is 0101010100111001
sailingthesoutherncross
The average haul from a bank robbery is only $6,000.
Atharaenea
Only?
d0o0o0d
Stickups are for losers. Serious bank robbers use the internet. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2016_Bangladesh_Bank_heist
IsDisassembled
Blame inflation for bank robberies being less worthwhile.
Bricklemeyer
It's because you can't get into the Vault. You only get what's in the drawers, and possibly ink packets that will invalidate the haul.
cousteau
Including frustrated ones?
BillogUncle
Step 2: Put mask on
HexGenderedPlasmaHorse
no one cared who i was until i put on the mask
GrimDarkRealities
I think maybe you should do this, and maybe a bit more prep work first...
psychologicaltrap
Or win the lottery.
Flyndaran
But are you really rich then or after you get your first pay out?
GrimDarkRealities
http://www.joemygod.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/lotteryFOx-660x330.png
TheHeathLedger
Step 1: Rob. A. Bank.
GBMaker
You've got this all figured out, huh?
Humanadvisor
Banks are some of the worst places to rob. Rob anywhere else and you could turn more money
TheHeathLedger
Step 1: Rob. A. Fucking. Bank.... Deposit the money in another bank.
HerrBisch
Then rob that bank. It will have more money because of all the money you just deposited.
absolutezero182
Rob an armored truck on pickup day
ikbenlike
#12 Venus and Mars both are in the goldielock zone too, though
FelicisAsphodel
Just throwing out that that's not supposed to be an image of Venus, Earth, and Mars, so it's a little misleading
ikbenlike
Yeah, I realised that too, a bit afterwards
RideTheStimutacs
Yeah, their situation is more about sustainable atmosphere than location.
Flyndaran
Mars is about how it lost its magnetic field. If it kept it, then it would've almost certainly kept its atmosphere and be teeming with life.
FairyGodzilla
there's also a theory it got smacked along the way, stripping most of it, too. And I think it's MS faded from the core activities cooling
Flyndaran
That seems highly unlikely. But it does have intermittent localized hot spots and very weak fields.
Warmblood
We still don't know for sure if the development of life is extremely rare or almost inevitable given time and the right conditions.
Flyndaran
True. We know that once life starts it's damn near impossible to stop. But we don't know what's needed for it to start.
Warmblood
We currently have a sample size of 1. But finding life anywhere else, even extinct lifeforms, would help answer that question.
skwint
Venus is sustaining a more impressive atmosphere than we are. It's just a bit too impressive if anything.
FairyGodzilla
we have Venus envy
HueJanus
God damn you, that's beautiful. +1
FraudulentPepsi
Those Venusians. Global warming. Didn't listen. Tsk tsk
Ben1045
I hope people realize that Venus' atmosphere has been way different than ours for probably over 2 billion years.
skwint
It's wasn't their fault - they were using clean coal. It was all a conspiracy by mercurians.
FraudulentPepsi
Mercuria first!
matchstickmetropolis
#3 but everyone DOES radically change the future. True, we don't think it, but that doesn't mean it's not happening.
mithiwithi
It's more that we don't know what we're changing the future FROM or TO, or which actions could have that effect.
NotAMeatPopsicle
Certain events are predictable within a certain probability. Travelling 60kph with certain known variables can be calculated within reason.
AmArschdieRaeuber
I think that is exactly what #3 is implying
ExplainThisJoke
I think it's combining the idiom "change the future" w/ literally changing the future. The idiom suggests "having a positive effect"
glutenfreepotato
But what if you were always going into the past and thus couldn't change the present or the future?
mithiwithi
Ah, the Discworld Troll theory of time. To them, the past is forward, because you can see it, and the future is behind, because you can't.
glutenfreepotato
Really? I didn't know the name of the theory it's just what makes sense to me lol
matchstickmetropolis
You will probably enjoy Terry Pratchett
glutenfreepotato
Guilty as charged I love his books
ZomWataar
But no one thinks they do.
ExplainThisJoke
We don't think we don't change the future. we just don't think we can change the future in the way we want it to
skwint
I do and am changing the future in enormous and drastic ways. I just don't know what they are and have little control over them.
NotAMeatPopsicle
Driving a vehicle at 60kph has factors predictable outcomes and you do have control over them within certain parameters.
skwint
I was thinking in terms of chaos theory, and me scaring a butterfly which stops a thunderstorm.
NotAMeatPopsicle
Still not a constant/absolute. Mathematically possible, but predictability is *extremely* low from our current frame of reference.
PhiIIipJFry
it's actually the exact same problem, people dont feel they can control the way in which the future acts. Which is applicable to both.
BlazeMarshall
We don't know what happens in the future is the problem. In order for change to have meaning, we must know what was changed.
Bricklemeyer
In order to change the future the future would already have to exist. In order for the future to exist, it would need to be fixed. If
NotAMeatPopsicle
You're assuming that the entirety of the future is fixed rather than malleable with some events having more friction than others.
Bricklemeyer
the future is fixed it can't be changed. What?
flamingflamingo
I met the love of my life on an internet forum 15 years ago. If I hadn't been convinced by my friends to sign up, I'd never know he exists.
hblb229
That's the point
Ozarck
Some believe that we do not change the future, as every physical action is simply the reaction to a previous one. Everything is inevitable.
matchstickmetropolis
I don't disagree, but by that logic, time travelers also could not change the future. Their actions would be predestined in the same way.
Ozarck
Obviously. I personally believe otherwise. I think human action is free and of consequence. We matter, and are not merely matter.
matchstickmetropolis
Personally I'm on the fence. Can I ask how you came to your conclusion?
matchstickmetropolis
Although maybe that'll be difficult in 140 characters :/
Ozarck
Quite a challenge for 140 characters. It all comes down to that immaterial 'I' am something other, yet 'I' interact with the material world.
LanceSackless
Btw its impossible to change the past. If someone went back in time and killed hitler, it would've already happened
LanceSackless
Always already happened*
NotAMeatPopsicle
Except that that past was part of the future. You're forgetting looping.
Rockers202
I disagree. When this baby hits 88mph, you're gonna see some serious shit.
Litten
You don't change the future, you make it.
FraudulentPepsi
I'm going to get up tomorrow and change some breakfast
Bodybag
yeah, you can't change it if it hasn't existed yet. it's just the outcome of your actions.
MostIndeedlySo
"The future has not been written. There is no fate but what we make for ourselves."
Toaster34
The issue is the past has occurred so it existed, but the future doesn't exist so it can't be changed. Assuming time is a straight line.
gunterleeds
But time is a flat circle....
Splodgey
WHAT WAS WILL BE. WHAT WILL BE WAS.
clearlymd
Actually can't change the future either really. Free will doesn't exist. There is a multiverse probably but we get shuttled along passively
razmann
we know what happened in the past, so we somewhat know what altering an event would do. we have no idea what the future holds, so we (1/2)
razmann
pretty much just fumble through, hoping for the best. (2/2)
matchstickmetropolis
But that's just your frame of reference. It's as easy to imagine that the future is fixed as it is fluid. It could be either way.
Flyndaran
Only if all physics is wrong. Sure, let's just pretend thermodynamics, entropy, and what's obvious is just an illusion... hippy.
matchstickmetropolis
Can you explain your position more? Genuinely curious.
Unravelled
.
NotAnIroningBoard
Space is gender fluid now
C0mtraya
Did you just assume my spacetime??!?
ConsumerOfStories
...okay, #8 is messing with me more than it should
KuuroiYuki
"Below" doesn't exist, except as the surface area of the planet. That black line around earth is the border between 'below' and 'above'.
KuuroiYuki
You could decide to use 'below' and 'above' in respect to the perpendicular of the solar system, but...
Revrot
Imagine you're on a giant hovering platform, and the terrain of Earth turned into air and cloud, then you look down into the deep blue.
rockerBOO
the "sky" isn't that large :P
Revrot
I mean, the sky is about 100 miles high, but people aren't..
SuperBobKing
It is more accurate to call "below" closer to the center of the Earth, so it really isn't.
stevenwonder
found the flat-earther
sockmarks
Yoo-hooo~!
SomewhatOxygenated
Remember that you can't see most of the sky - the Earth is in the way
septillion
The real reason it's misleading is that you aren't 100 miles tall. If you were, the earth and sky really would look like it was below you.
creepymustacheguy
Don't see what's so misleading. The Earth's a sphere, it curves away from us in all directions. The air surrounds it equally from all sides.
septillion
it's an accurate representation of the earth, just not of people.
ImgursLibertarian
You'd also have to lay down with your face on the ground in Florida to breathe, and walk about 30 steps to the great Lakes to drink....
ImgursLibertarian
And then lean over and shit in new jersey. Because that's what I've heard about new jersey.
matchstickmetropolis
Its misleading. Its a subjective orientation, when really, the enemy's gate is down, so to speak. Equally towards the ground from any point.
ChellFreeman
What?
ImOnlyHereBecauseTheAppMakesYouMakeAnAccountGoodbyeLurking
Enders Game
ChellFreeman
Oh.
albinoscion
+1 Bean
pooplols
Just the best fucking reply ever. Freeze my legs, I'm going in fuckers
matchstickmetropolis
I would like to respond with a relevant gif from the film, but (I'll be that guy) it just didn't live up to the book.
triplecriticaljur
Wait, there was a movie based on the book??
CheshirePhoenix
Yup, and it completely missed the point of the book, in favor of "mind boggling" special effects.
scatterspark
You have taken one for the team, my good sir, and I applaud you for it.
desperateenuf
are you a professor?
matchstickmetropolis
Lol, not even a little bit
ImOnlyHereBecauseTheAppMakesYouMakeAnAccountGoodbyeLurking
Ender's Game