jansenart
148385
4242
58
I'm stone cold sober and I knew EXACTLY what she meant by this.
So I made a spreadsheet with the phonetic American English pronunciations of each letter.
...and I applied a sort.
H R A B D W E F L M N S X I G J K O P Q C T V Y U Z
No, it's not useful.
No, I'm definitely not the first to think of this, I don't even imagine that.
That being said, here it is, ready for whatever you want to do with it.
FP Edit; Uh, hang on. Wait... no.
yourbassist
DanielPucci0
Zed
itsfunnythatwordsmeanthings
Aye haitch u
Moridin23
The V I B R A T I O N made him do it
RebeIScum
Yeah my man beth
pigzunderground
Zed!!! It's English not French, it's Zed in English! Down to the French, Boney lost the war! God save the Queen!! ☕?
jansenart
American English, as emphasized
pigzunderground
I know, I was trying to be funny. American English borrows the pronounciation of Z from French, that's the history of why it's Zee in AmE
RideTheStimutacs
Q is spelled cue. G is spelled Jee.
jansenart
Queue as in stand in the queue. Gee as in G as in Gee-forces.
RideTheStimutacs
Kyu and djee
SnowpersonHitInTheFaceWithALackOfCreativity
Can we also do something about the numbers eleven and twelve? It's oneteen and twoteen. I will also accept onety-one and onety-two
JanglesPrime
That's sorta how it works in Japanese. 11 is 10+1, 12 is 10+2, and so on.
SnowpersonHitInTheFaceWithALackOfCreativity
I've recently been reading The Man in the High Castle. It's fascinating how Japanese culture could integrate with Western culture
YoloSwagginsAndTheKnightsOfTheRoundTable
So this is sorted phonetically to the traditional alphabet..?
iusedtodream
Still works with the song so I'm cool with this.
jansenart
Now I know my HRA's, next time won't you STOP ME PLEASE
coralto
It has to rhyme with A not C. Now I know my HRA’s, THIS IS CRAZY ANYWAYS
jansenart
Who was trying to rhyme?
besttom
Thanks, I hate it.
DionysianMask
Thanks, I hate it. +1
Lurker4815162342
#1so weak. Your bloodline must end with you. Here in Finland 9 cups of coffee is considered just enough for breakfast.
NomDeImguerre
#2 Fun fact: the Dutch alphabet only has 23 letters. The KLM keeps flying away.
miertam
this should be a cryptology seed..
jansenart
Well, not anymore.
opwankenop
Wait a minute.. is G 'gee' or 'jee'?
jamieoc
In Ireland, gee is pronounced with a hard G and is slang for vagina.
FlyingDutchGirl
Fonetically, it would be djee
opwankenop
Djeereat! :)
FlyingDutchGirl
That straindjeee djeeraf is kaint of djeereat
wozat
Guh
Katateochi
I feel there must be a file explaining this, perhaps in a Graphics Interchange Format?
SmoeAhsolse
It's pronounced gjeef.
Elementalist01
it would be jee
toomanymemesandnotenoughmemeory
It’s a damn shit show, but I’m down!
safaripig
Zed, eh? ?
saldrSleepTaker
My favourite spelling of it
jansenart
That's why I said "American English" and also it changes nothing.
TheBisexualestBoyInTheVillage
Haich?
Qwah
Zeds dead baby!
poot85
Bring out the gimp
poot85
Gimp's sleepin
poot85
Well, I guess you better go wake him up then, don't you
LTP88
Yeah, Zed mate.
ahorseelbowdeepinme
Who else sang the song to confirm it still worked?
JeffGodofBiscuits
ArtOfKarolMichalec
A ął be ce cie de e ęł ef gie ha i jot ka el eł em en eń o ó pe er es eś te u w iks igrek zet ziet żet = Polish
mormacil
a bay say day e ef ghay ha i yay ka el em an o pay err es thee u vay way iks ei zet = Dutch
ArtOfKarolMichalec
Yay vay way = jewish
mormacil
Only three letters? That's gotta be hard
ArtOfKarolMichalec
I was kinda playing on the "Oy ay vey" exclamation
TwoBitGreaser
Green11ndys
We also took aspects from the Norse and their Elder Futhark runes.
OneDayWeRodeTheMountainCrestAndIWentEastAndHeWentWest
So you're saying S is descended from Z, Z is descended from I, and I is descended from Z? Classic english.
JanglesPrime
Language is funny. Zeus, Jupiter and Tuesday all come from the same root word.
MithNL
What if you alphabetize the alphabet by the new alphabet? And keep going, is there an alphabet singularity?
jumpbus360
What's next? Trying to convince us Americans to go metric.
simplefishy
WilliamInman
Genius
margaretfoster0710
Love this episode.
trapdoorogre
I love this scene.
legalisegaymarijuana
Why did he need to take them outside if he was just going to put the fire pit anyway?
Mockingbirb
iwonderwhatthemaxusernamecharacterlimitis
Smoke
hye1901
I disagree on the H. It's obviously pronounced Aych
pandagoose5
This, among other things, bothered me, as well
ReverseTrapTsukasa
Go with ecchi for a giggle.
Raydeeo
I am still so so so bothered with how you decided to spell out Q.
WhatBackWaterCountry
And that zee isn't zed.
SmoeAhsolse
They specified American English.
jansenart
Raydeeo
I mean yeah England made sure I had to deal with it when I waged war on and colonised the majority of the western world.
SmoeAhsolse
You must have been very busy.
Raydeeo
Me specifically no since I didn’t live in a colonised country. But since they did I have to deal with English being global language
BassMonkeyBravo
The "ueue" is just showing you how to properly queue.
Raydeeo
Of course! It makes sense and even further devaluates the English language ?
Raydeeo
The English language in general, that is.
TurdFerguson420
Should be Kue or Cue.
Raydeeo
Or kew
kerms
Or Kyoo.
Raydeeo
That pronounce very differently in my head
slinkiisu
I named a character in STO Kew for that exact reason
Raydeeo
STO?
slinkiisu
Star Trek online
itsfunnythatwordsmeanthings
Where are all my “haitchers” at??
superhans1988
https://i.imgur.com/h0eQX1v yooo we here bud!
BrotherEstapol
As an Aussie I absolutely can't stand this. Please pronunce H correctly!! Damn those Irish Nuns!
PunsExceptTheyAreAFewHoursLate
MopingMechanism
My first imgur comment:
BrotherEstapol
Copperbrat
Y'all pronounce the h when saying the letter then just fucking ignore it when it's in a word: 'ospital, 'ello, 'oliday, 'ouse.
kaitlynbutwiththeromannumeralsVIII
H with a H all the way
AR33
https://youtu.be/j4hvh5e8-nw
BlueDub
letthecatout
But Q could be cue
Pottsofgold
And U could be ewe
laiskamato
Kjuu
Santarana
but... its been sorted according to the traditional alphabet...?
itchytoesnoclothes
Exactly
ahorseelbowdeepinme
Interestingly enough, after the fifth time ot goes back to the traditional order. Weird.
Awimachinegun
Depends on the spelling, but I don't think that's true. Check my other comment.
ahorseelbowdeepinme
No, I made it up for comedic effect. I'm sorry if I made you do that work.
Chrjstoh
Just remember tho, the alphabet has never and continues to not needing an order
ProfessorSnugglesworth
It does still need an order, otherwise we wouldn't be able to alphabetize things but, yes, the order is completely made up and arbitrary.
Awimachinegun
I made this. https://www.reddit.com/r/dataisbeautiful/comments/l9irr0/alphabet_recursively_alphabetized_by_letter_name/
mandymarvelous
Right! Thats what i thought! If the alphabet was realphabetized to be in alpahbetical order, then doesnt that void the original alphabet?
mandymarvelous
And thus create an infinite alphabetical loop?
qmoodo
To stop the metaphysical loop, just say it’s alphabetized by the song known as, “The Alphabet Song”.
qmoodo
and then be satisfied in the knowledge that the song is in incorrect order but it’s permissible due to creative license.
KoRplussomeletters
Japanese has a "traditional" order for its syllables that is according to a poem called the Iroha. It has every syllable exactly once.
Dodilei
I think it's impossible, with english phonetics, to make an alphabet sorted by itself.
jansenart
Unfortunately google sheets doesn't have a metalphabet sort and I don't know enough code to make it have one.
DreamingOfTacos
Met-alphabet, or metal-phabet?
Chadkos
Add a new column on the left and put the number position for each letter and then sort on that new column with everything selected :)
3Davideo
RECURSIVE ALPHABETIZATION
DrArsMoriendi
Exactly, cheap cop-out. The alphabet should be sorted by its own phonetic system, otherwise I'm not impressed
ThatShiftyMonkey
What?
JustHere4TheComments
I don’t know
iCanOrderPepperoniPizza
The new order of letters is based off the original alphabetical order. I don’t even have an analogy for this.
1337firewife
The way they "resorted" it puts the phonetic alphabet in traditional alphabetical order. Even resorted it's ABC for some reason.
germerica
im with you bud
CoxZuckerMachine
Meaning you could realphabetize the alphabet a THIRD TIME based on this
ENCHANTMEN
If you do it enough times, would you eventually reach a sorting that's sorted according to itself?
ENCHANTMEN
The answer is yes! The ordering is R, A, H, B, D, W, Y, U, I, E, F, L, M, N, S, X, C, G, J, K, O, P, Q, T, V, Z
SpiderProof
If you did that over and over, I wonder if it would arrive a self-consistent state, eventually loop around, or on forever.
CoxZuckerMachine
Also its ambiguous like, is Q "queue" like op says or "cue"?
blipko
Can someone please do it?
CoxZuckerMachine
You think I ain't thought about this since elementary school? I just never had the AUDACITY to up and make the Google spreadsheet
jansenart
I prefer the term "gall".
TerrorGuy58
Hairy brass cahones
TheCuntCrusader
KurtHamster
... And then again with the new result.. It will never end!
torillatavataan
Using the more or less official letter names, it actually ends _very_ quickly. It converges to ARHBCQDWEFLMNSXGIJKOPTUVYZ in just two steps.
torillatavataan
In other words, if that were the alphabetical order, then the English letter names would be in alphabetical order.
MalucFieri
If you skip letters like H that no other letter begins with rather than re-ordering them it ends after a 3rd arrangement. I think.
IAmTheBadW01f
That's a good call, great simplification! That's the sort of thinking that gets problems solved! -former math teacher
MalucFieri
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/10mB3G1NiW8NwfCeVGiEtJZEoHHUG_vxoOpIOlWunXig/edit
Ghlargh
Someone (not it!) needs to iterate this to see if the iteration comes to a stable end point or if it loops.
ENCHANTMEN
It finds an end! RAHBDWYUIEFLMNSXCGJKOPQTVZ
candar
Y'all are fuckin heroes
[deleted]
[deleted]
SlightlyToastedPostItNotes
Dot
thisgoesto11
This will start an endless feedback loop that draws increasing power until it crashes civilization completely. Dot.
NullResult
.
Cruxex
.
MalucFieri
Don’t you worry. https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/10mB3G1NiW8NwfCeVGiEtJZEoHHUG_vxoOpIOlWunXig/edit
fatcatfishface
.
ImOPsMom
Heheheh dot
Selekta
It’s Monday where I am, get on that shit, .
LovepieCreampuff1031
.
vuckho
.
737ngjock
.
SergeantTerryJeffords
.
FlamingoAsFuck
.
TakeAFannyGallop
While we’re fixing the alphabet, W needs to be renamed to double-vee.
thenewandy
And 'V' can be single-vee too while we are at it.
thenewandy
And 'N' can be one-and-a-half-vee-but-a-bit-wonky
Ferlin7
I like the cut of your jib.
AwesomeTeddybear
It needs to be renamed WEE, like in many languages.. you're not the French, with your four-twenty-ten-nine in stead of ninety-nine
RocinanteBelongsToMars
In Russian they said fuck this and made it one letter. В
LexWisdom
Having English as second language, please don't do that. Let that in life happen it's hurting no one! I don't want to relearn!
ChairmanLMA0
billyrayvirus
But it makes a the sound of two U's, not two V's.
WinoCrimesand69s
Isnt that way because in Latin roots, the letter U was written as V?
Articate
Not really. It makes a double u sound. Louu for low, not lovv (love)
zachCherubicSlug
Then shouldn’t M be ‘double n’ as well?
Revadarius
It's double u in lower case, and double V in upper case... Fucked me up as a kid.
ChainedMonkey
As I write them both upper and lower case look like UU and uu respectively. Guess it depends on how we were taught as a kid.
TwoSeamer
It's called that in Czech, much like other languages per the comments
djmarquart
But it comes from U, just like V does. If anything V needs to be renamed 'Pointy U'
Justlikeyouropinion
OlafJS
It is like that in Norwegian, "Ve" (V) and "dobbelt Ve" (W). If we wanna specify we can say "enkelt Ve" (V)
ReverseTrapTsukasa
I'm going to call W, President Bush
signer94
In Denmark we say double v "dobbelt-v"
TheRibThatGrewBack
Why it's called that: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sg2j7mZ9-2Y
awkwardllama
Not the way I write them...
TheRealPumpkinQueen
It is in Norsk
endomorph
In German it's "Uuh", "Fow" (V), "Weh/Way/Weigh", "Ix", "Ypsilon", "Tzett"...
OhNoNotThatGuyQuickEverybodyHide
In my handwriting I actually make a double-u, I know ai'm not the only one.
mattdubois
En français it is
Polysloth
Surely it should be Madonna boobs?
ultrafloral
I prefer Lara Croft boobs
Polysloth
I've been playing those games recently, the original v the most recent is crazy
Falknot
Listen very carefully for I only say this once, the painting of madonna with the big boobies?
Polysloth
Ze big boobies?
unclesporky
While we're fixing the alphabet, we don't need X or C. You can write foks, or boks, or zylofone. And C just duplicates K and S. >
unclesporky
Meaning, you could just write kar, kat, plase, rase. The only novel use of C is in CH, and that could simply be changed to KH.
Vesane
DoWGray
Can we get rid of the useless ones (c, x, q) while we're at it?
morbidconcerto
C!? But my name!
Ghlargh
What do you mean, Morbidkonserto?
Millsslslsls
sertainly we kan.
Nizedk
It will be too kvality of very high klass
Vesane
SirRichardOfHead
In Finnish it is! "vee" and "tuplavee"
fartgirl
Or ”kaksois-vee”, twin-v
SirRichardOfHead
Juu tokihan.
zanoii
Hoppla!
GuyWithDog
German goes with Wee for W... But V is Vau and could be Fau as there's no phonetical difference anymore
ArtOfKarolMichalec
Same, Polish w is Vu, v is fau. But we dont actually have V, X and Q in our alphabet, only in foreign words
slinkiisu
It's Ver for W and Fau for V. Of course Y is Upsilon so fuck German.
Exceptionelli
What was the difference before?
vorodar
Roman alphabet used the V sign for a U letter. It's easier to carve in stone. That's where the W comes - two V signs.
Nippledeepinahorse
You know what's always struck me as bullshit about it being easier to carve? The fact that they used a b c d e f g o p q r and s with no //
Nippledeepinahorse
Difficulty whatsoever.
HerrHat
How would one pronounce this UU and how would one use it in current English? fire example in "Work" its not U.
vorodar
"uuork" is closer to how you'd pronounce that word than "uork". Although, do remember hat Latin is quite far removed from modern English.
ianmalkaviac
W just makes both sounds the U makes, in other words a double U sound. That's why is called the double U
ScorneontheCob
I found out that in Welsh it actually makes a deep “uye” kind of sound, only language I’ve seen where it makes sense to call it double U
MudTheFarCus
'W' is a vowel in Welsh too. That's why so many words appear to be unpronounceable. E.g. "Cwrw" (beer) and "dwr" (water).
Ferlin7
I love learning about languages! It's fascinating! In another life I might have studied linguistics.
capngoat
With Australian English the order changes a bit. They pronounce H "haich".
muggybonehead
Haitch is an Irish-ism that has entered the UK like wildfire. It may have been the older pronunciation though. IDC, I mean IDK.
jansenart
It's already that in Spanish. I like our weird-ass two vees that are spelled UU.
Jooga
And Finnish..
Henell27
Finnish too
Beezlebubble
Depends on how you write it...I use loopy ms and ws
pip1
uwu
DargonBall
Double uWu
Ketheres
Finnish as well. We don't even use the damn letter in any of our words.
Robvp
It's double v for Spain spanish and parts of Latin America, I'm in Mexico and we say double u
TheOrangeLady
Danish too
Misterdruglicious
for a second I forget double v in french
Saismirk
In spanish you can say either double-v or double-u, we won't judge.
johnzaku
French too
Misterdruglicious
I forgot for a second and I am bilingual since birth
ThisNameIsNotAboutYou
And German
raadoo
I think all the Romance languages call it double v. ... Cause that's what it is!
Ferlin7
Unfortunately Brazilian Portuguese hasn't fixed it yet. I heard that European Portuguese is half and half.
raadoo
The more you know!
geesetreats
In French it is! "Vay"/V and "Doobla Vay"/Double V
thotterpop
I think German, too... In their language. Ok, it's not a vowel in their language
UsernameAlreadyTaken058
No, we pronounce V as "fau" (as in fountain). It's a hard F sound in most words (but not all). W is simple "we" (as in were).
derJake
More like vay than were, because it's a labiodental.
UsernameAlreadyTaken058
So if you see names like Volker, it's not pronounced like "Wolker". It's pronounced like "Folker".
StellarJay77
Yes but wtf is up with your pronunciation of Y?
derJake
It's greek "i", so perfectly valid name and the same in Spanish.
geesetreats
What, you don't like EEGREK? LORD OF BILE AND SINEW, HARBINGER OF GORE, DESTROYER OF ALL THAT BRINGS MERRIMENT?!
StellarJay77
It brings phlegm is what it brings. Also the French G is still the whole reason we have the "how to pronounce gif" debate still.
ollikahn
it's gif not gif
CaseU
It should be ‘wee’
AmyBethMegJo
Yes, it is the only letter that doesn't have it's own unique name.
ImJoeCooper
uoeno
In Dutch, it is. But pronounced like "whey".
CaseU
Precies mijn punt!
NebulaSwitch
Well after that much coffee that's to be expected
Hemelsblauw
EckiTheGreat
In Germany it is
NotQuiteEntirelyUnlikeTea
And in French.
NickKater
And v is fau
MajorBraindamage
German has the "Ypsilon" instead, which needs fixing as well
ThisprogramcannotberuninDOSmode
And in Dutch
somethingawesomeandgreat
And my Axe
Raydeeo
And Sweden
Imkeepingthisusername
Not in Norway, it's 'dobbelt v' there, but the v is pronounced as w and there's no vowel for the v sound.
ollikahn
and my sword!
emjay9010
Nah, I gotta disagree. How do you write it by hand? Not type font, by hand. It deffo looks like 2 u's to me.
Goldensands
Because your testicle drawing is so much more valid in 2020 than the type font.. it’s two V’s.
emjay9010
Lol are you stuck in last year or what? And who's gonna tell all the pen companies that they gotta go outta business since no one uses them?
GeneralParn
Both correct. In french it is double V rather than double U. English chose to name it after the lowercase and French the upper case.
GeneralParn
If anyone does not understand just look a a cursive lower case W and a cursive capital W.
Ferlin7
Be careful with logic. It's dangerous to use on the internet!
JanglesPrime
My initials are WLV. When I write them with one stroke they make a lightning bolt.
JanglesPrime
I'm just saying you have never seen me and the Flash in the same room together.
emjay9010
Nice try, Harry! :D