An Unlucky 13th Random Phone-Clearing Dump

OMG, what are these pictures of these gorgeous, mysterious, and lovely Goth women doing on my phone?!?

I swear, the security for these mobile devices these days is less than ideal, quite frankly.

I...I am just shocked and appalled at the situation. That someone would put these on my phone without my knowledge is frightening.

Well, I'll tell you what I am most certainly NOT going to do. I am definitely NOT going to look up the band Obsidian Chants on YouTube to come across more imagery like this.

And I am most certainly NOT recommending that you do the same! No siree, Bob,

Anyway, where were we? Oh, right, back to business.

Did someone order a 12-inch sausage?

OUR urine!

Hey, I thought we took care of the kinks at the beginning.

Have a nice day.

Can you feed rice to the kraken?

I'd need to see the credentials.

McGod Damn It.

At least double check to see if it's not the same one.

And you waive Disney of all responsibility!

It puts Harry's to shame.

How's it hanging?

It's a lovely award.

What didn't?

I, for one, welcome our new feline overlords.

Spread them cheeks.

Zangief approves.

The disappointment.

This is Tattooine. This is Tattooine.

Oops.

Give them a little chop suey.

Winners don't do drugs either.

Mercilessly.

Spare no details.

Where it belongs.

Fuck this game...and I'm someone who's beaten Ninja Gaiden.

A dinglehopper is all you need.

As an uncle, I am at a loss.

This also works with Bigfoot.

That microwave just clashes.

This thing is so strange.

I'm at a loss.

It could've been anyone.

At least there are tissues on the nightstand.

Or Cortana.

Call next time.

He's narrowing it down.

I, too, am worried that this was the case for a lot of people.

:(

Neigh.

What a wily character.

Among other things.

How's your sex life, Joseph?

Yikes, where'd the pixels go?

Like the hero walking away from an explosion.

His nickname is Eileen.

Still better than a Cybertruck.

If this were in a video game, you still wouldn't be able to go around it.

They deserve it.

Get it up.

Facts.

9 out of 10 cats are victims of non-consensual cuddling every day.

I'm looking forward to it.

X needs to promote its video capabilities. Maybe call it xvideos or something.

I know I'm inspired.

My mom is a muggle, sadly.

*sigh*

*double sigh*

Or pay off debt.

Narrator: They, in fact, could not do it.

Don't call me out.

Can you believe it?

Well?

It's your one gift.

And you say she's just man's best friend.

Diplomacy = 1

And my sword.

Seriously.

Now that's worth crying over.

Go with Pauline this time.

Emotional damage.

Use your words.

Shame.

Exterminate!

Marked.

Those who know.

It's an Amaz-ing box! Fuck, that was weak.

Through the fire and the flames....

Any takers?

She's a freak.

Applause.

Why now?

I need to go see this.

Yeah!

Yeah, I mean did Jesus REALLY mean feed the poor?

Floyd got the good shit.

If the tail is raised that means you have mail.

Binge goals.

I can concur.

I can testify that I do need help.

Co-workers can be the worst sometimes.

Lzzy tax with extra cheese!

Void tax!