I found my Dad last night

Feb 5, 2017 10:25 PM

accipita

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He hadn't replied to texts or calls for a couple days so I went round to check if he was OK. I found him curled up on his bed, cold, stiff and still. Every time I stop a think for a second I can feel it again. I'm not here for the fake internet points but I've seen you guys offer kind words in situations like this time and time again. I'm 27, I didn't expect to be planning to bury my Dad this young.

Lost my dad at 24, and time has helped more than everything. Atmosphere's song Yesterday was surprisingly soothing. I'm sorry for your loss.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

I lost mine nearly five years ago, lean on those around you, being sad is not weakness allow yourself to process and mourn. Sending love op

9 years ago | Likes 180 Dislikes 0

THIS. You have to let yourself mourn and stay well. Keep yourself fed and hydrated. I'm very sorry for your loss, friend.

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

Be kind to yourself, let others be kind to you. Grieve, cry, scream. Be kind to yourself. Prayers.

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

Remember when people say asinine things about life or God's plan or whatever, they have no idea what to say--they're just trying to help.

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

Yeah. It's a difficult thing to do. I've been on both sides and there's just no right words.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

If anything helps i lost mine at 13, it was heart attack, it sas fast and cold, still fill the pain, if you want dm me i can help

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Was not sas°°°

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

@op it's never easy. I lost my mom almost two years ago. Before I turned 23. I'm 24 now. It doesn't go away. You'll have nights that it 1/?

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Hits like a brick wall. Other nights it will just be on your mind a lot. If you need someone to talk to, send me a message. 2/2

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Ten years. I'm 27. Sometimes it still hits me.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Sending you love op

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Never have shame in your grief, use alcohol sparingly, sleep when you can, take 1 week to cry, sleep, and eat crap, then slowly move forward

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Sorry for your lose too op

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Dad at 19. Sister at 20. Mom last year at 31. Still have two sisters. I feel for ya.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

God damnit. *Hugs*

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

My mom died three weeks ago, OP. I'm so sorry. It doesn't get better, but eventually it gets easier.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

I'm 26 and sat in the room while mam took her last breaths in November. It's the most jarring thing in the world. DM if you need to x

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

My mom tried to kill herself last year. I thought I was going to have to bury her, at 26. it was so terrifying. I'm so sorry.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

So sorry, @OP. Thinking of you and hoping you find some peace. Be well.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

It's shitty OP I lost my dad when I was 18 and my mom when I was 23. It's hard but you can make it through.

9 years ago | Likes 30 Dislikes 0

Lost my dad at 18, im 25 now. The pain fades but never truly leaves us, such is the same fortheir memories, influence and sacrifices for us.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I buried mom in September. It was sudden as well. Be close to the people that you're close to. I'm sorry for your loss.

9 years ago | Likes 1339 Dislikes 1

Lost my dad last september, , oldest bro with no job, was angry at my dad b4 he passed, life is 2 short to be angry at some1, stay strong

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I, too, lost my mom in September. I'm sorry

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

I made the call to extubate Mom several years ago. It doesn't go away, but it does get better. Hang in there.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

If I can offer any sort of advice it would be to let yourself grieve. Be a mess for a bit, it's ok.

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

September 17 for me. Graveside service. The minister was awful, but my cousin sang In the Garden, same one as at my dad's funeral.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

When i was 17 my mom killed herself. This is why i tell everyone i love that i love them every time i see them or talk to them.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

It’s so difficult. We are legion that lose to suicide. It will get better, but will stay always, too. Wish U Peace...

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm 27 now. Took a while but it did get better even though it is still with me.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It's been 28 years since my father took his life. It will echo down the halls of yr dreams forever, sadly.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I'm sure it will, but so will she. At least won't forget her.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It's been 2 years since my mom passed. I'm 24. Msg. Me and hang with loved ones. Only their body is gone. Take your time fam. Take your time

9 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 1

It's been ten years this July for me. I'm 27.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I'm 24, that is my worst nightmare. I couldn't begin to imagine. Sorry for your loss.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Ya just find your way honestly. Not always gracefully. Ask all the questions you can now

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Lost my mom 6 years ago now. 8 weeks from diagnosis to death. Still really dealing with it. Much love and hope to you right now.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

I like the "Be close to the people that you're close to"... Nice. Solid. Sound.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

My mom died in September too, I still feel lost 1/2 the day. One moment if she is still around, one moment as she is gone forever.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Take ALL the time that you need. Grieve. Don't let anybody - ANYBODY - tell you "you have to be ok now and act as usual" just cause they say

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It can be a day, a week, a month or a year - only you can make that call. I lived with my mom for 30 years till her last day. This doesn't

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

just pass you in a few weeks. I have concentration problems, sleep badly every other day, nightmares, feeling of emptiness and loss...

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

When I think after a week it got better it starts all over again... You have to get used to the new situation. Talk to people.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Losing parents always sucks. I lost both of em in a accident at age 7. After 15 years still can't get over it. Hope your grief pass buddy.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I buried my mum in September aswell rodent, my condolences.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

As a vop who has done several DOA jobs, I'm sorry. I'm honestly tired of having to break the news to families, but a million times over 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Would rather find them than you. I have seen some undignified last moments. Best wishes.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

28. Buried my dad last week. ✊ watched his eyes roll back and take his last breath. ???? you're never really ready even if you're ready.. ?

9 years ago | Likes 82 Dislikes 0

I don't want to meet the person who is "ready" for that, ya know? You're human.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

From a part of distant family I know that "ready"can be a possible thing but it's difficult to put into words. >

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

> Mainly when a loved one is in such a state that they are essentially dead within the mind.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I did that in my late 30's, and you're right, you aren't.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

It's an experience you'll never forget, and be grateful that you were there with him. That's how I feel about being with my mom, anyway.

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

My mom died in my arms. You're never ready.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

I'm so so sorry. But glad he had a son who kept close enough to notice not getting daily contact. You were a good son, and he was lucky.

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

I'm sorry. I know how you feel. I'm 15 and lost my dad in October, sudden heart attack. Words cannot express the pain you're going through.

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

But stay strong. Stay close with the ones that love you and support you. They'll keep you sane, they'll keep you alive and strong.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Remember your dad as who he was. The moments you loved with him. His favorite movies. His laugh, his smile, his frown, his anger. Remember

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Remember it all. They will shape you for years to come as he has. He loved you, always know that. Always.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Amazing words from someone so young. Truly... thank you.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I lost my mom at 19. Grieve on your own time and don't be surprised if shit hits you like a ton of bricks five months from now.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Or five years. Took me a long time to let myself mourn. There were things i had t forgive first.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Yeah...it'll be five years in March for me...lost my mom at 17. Every now and then a memory will resurface and I have to sit down and cry.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Me too. It sucks when I dream about her

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I found mine at the end of a rope when i was ten. Dont bury the feels it will only blow up in your face. You have my condolences.stay strong

9 years ago | Likes 38 Dislikes 0

I can't even imagine... F*ck. I have a child of my own and the thought of what you described brings me to tears thinking she would see this.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Jesus I'm sorry. That's so awful.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Plot Twist: Moustachel's parent is an acrobat and does trapeze.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 9

But seriously though, my condolences. Dwell upon the good times and the loss will almost feel as if it never happened.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 3

That's almost as bad as the attempted joke. Don't minimize someone's loss. You're either an asshole troll or have social problems.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

@canisiel if you ever feel like you don't have many close friends or family is distant at times please know you can seek professional help.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

@canisiel just make an appointment with a councilor and show them your comment here. Be very happy, your life can get better with some help.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Nice try. But still go fuck yourself

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 1

More or less same thing happened when I was 12 to my mom, whatever you do don't bury it, it can only hurt more and longer if you do

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

My mom killed herself too. I'm glad I'm not the one who found her. That terrifies me. But my heart hurts when i remember my dad begging her

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

to wake up. I don't know how he survived that.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

27 - one year younger than me when I lost my mum and dad (I'm 44 now). You never get over it but learn to live with it. Take care my friend.

9 years ago | Likes 921 Dislikes 1

He'll, I never got over my grandfather and other grandmother dying. This was more about the cause for me which felt unjust. Take care.

9 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 0

Sorry for your loss. Lost my mom when I was 14. I really wish she could have been there to guide me through my teens and see me get married

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

I lost my dad at 13 and 15 years later have thought that everyday, you learn to adjust not accept it

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

What do you mean you never get over it? Are you always sad?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

No, I mean you can go through your day and a simple thing can remind you of what you’ve lost (not that you dwell on it). 1/3

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Hard to explain I suppose things like wanting to ask something about your family history but can never get an answer to. 2/3

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Also, if someone in (say) their 50's talks about seeing their parents I realise how much time I lost - makes me wish I could do that. 3/3

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Ah I see. Thanks for the answer. I guess its unavoidable

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Or you become a parent, and wonder how happy your parents would, how they will be missed as grandparents. Oh shit, I'm crying.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Was 25 when I saw my dad off... been 13 years now... you never forget

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I found mine dead when I was 17... There's only one thing you can do, in this situation. Fight! Everyday!

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Live the life your father wanted you to have. And always think about him

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

He's only a thought away. They all are.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

beautifully said! As long as we keep them in our minds and hearts they are not gone. As an atheist, that was the only comfort I could get

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Wow

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

24 when my dad died. Smoking-related illness. He struggled for a long while, so it was more of a relief. He was happy and not in pain. He >

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

> was 70. I'm very much the youngest in my family, so it really sucks in some ways. Take care OP. <3

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Hello, fellow 44 year old.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 2

So true Alfhooker. Both my parents and only brother died in 1999. I miss them every single day, but you learn to live without them.

9 years ago | Likes 48 Dislikes 0

not even a parent. I still miss my uncle. love furiously

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I have nothing to say except I can't even imagine this. I'm so sorry *hug*

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

My brother's name is/was Tommy. Smile.

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Awe :)

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I have nothing to say except I can't even imagine this. I'm so sorry *hug*

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I have nothing to say except I can't even imagine this. I'm so sorry *hug*

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0