Horny Phone Dump

Jul 16, 2026 3:43 AM

LeoFloof

Views

8741

Likes

314

Dislikes

20

(Sad horny noises)

Who will save this drowning man?

.

.

.

.

.

Boy crazy, boat crazy, booze crazy? Ayuh! We sure are!

.

.

.

I bet you do, though.

Local wisdom.

I’m only nice to people I’m trying to lure into sin.

.

.

.

Jokes on you - I’m in therapy *and* medicated!

.

I’ve been coming into my early cougar days…

.

.

Not much of a coffee drinker, tbh.

.

.

.

.

.

Except I’m *also* out of spaghetti :(

.

Fucking shrinkflation. #thanks_obama

.

.

.

.

.

.

The Wizard of Earthsea

.

.

.

.

Just a little infographic I made to help educate the public. #public_service_anouncment

.

When I first saw this one I panicked thinking, “how does Imgur know that I’m Italian?!?!” For once I was hornier than I was hungry.

I hope you come again - I look forward to servicing you.

Local bar delivering more than drinks.

Is that so much to ask??

Cat tax, plus a pic of the man who watches me shower every night.

#memes #phone_dump #funny

#9 braless women eating fruit are certainly my downfall

1 week ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 1

#38 what book series? Like a single one? Because it’d take hours to write them all down and I’m not at all sure how I’d refine it.

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#24 Story time: this is how i outed myself at work.

There was a bunch of caution tape lying around from when maintenance fixed a crane. Some of the guys were tying it on to people's walkie talkies (on their back hip) to make it look like they had tails. Someone did that to me and when i noticed i tied this knot, put it loosley on my wrists, grabbed his hands, elevated my elbows so the cuffs slid to his wrists, & pulled them tight. My boss asked why i knew that knot, im like "why do you think?"

1 week ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

#27 I made $10 today, I can do both! :D

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#31 I haven't gotten stroked in like 4 years. And based on my life, it'll never happen again. 😕

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#6 A+ absolutely do this

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#4 Mass surveillance and the feeling of always being watched is not something I desire. This is boot speak.

1 week ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I need an adult, not a ruling body systemically subjugating the population while pouring resources into keeping all but the elite in a permanent wage-slave status.

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You're right

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#19 straight to the poly-chat with this one

1 week ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

1 week ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#17 saving this little frog guy for when i finally meet a neurodivergent bisexual who isnt going to therapy

1 week ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

o/

1 week ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Hey! I’m in therapy and am still very weird.

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

want to chat and tell me about your therapy and how weird you are?

1 week ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#new years resolution

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

An inspiration.

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#47

1 week ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 2

get it girl

1 week ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#38 Animorphs was probably a bad choice

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

#48 And Lt. Barclay

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The main reason I don’t use AI is because of the environmental and social impact, along with the fact that AI is theft.

But also

I know myself well enough to suspect I’d go full Barclay.

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#7 this is why maga is full of incels

1 week ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#23 not much of a weed smoker, I’ll take your coffee, you can have my weed

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Nice dump.

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#33 I don't have enough manly chest hair to show.

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#48 and shields at 10% and failing.....

1 week ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I once had a doctor compare me to France, and my sluttiness(?) to a fortification wall.

“If there are holes in your wall *anyone* can get in! The Visigoths, the Romans, anyone!”

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#40 dammit how do I find a sparkly unicorn?

1 week ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Firstly, you're gonna need about a gallon of LSD...

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The same way I find a crew to fill my battle cruiser.

Don’t follow my advice. I’m so very, very single. It’s a ghost ship over here.

1 week ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0