DarwinFinch
338706
8369
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Had a guy come up to me while I was out at night to share the 'good news' with me and went on to tell his life story about his heroin addiction and how God cured him of it and how he could cure me too. I told him I wasn't interested but he kept insisting. I ended up having to wave some police officers over to get him to back off.
I get this one a lot at uni. People trying to make a joke, but it often falls flat as I say 'Ha! Yeah I guess I am lucky!'.
SO MANY PEOPLE think it's okay to just ask me this outright. No 'Hi how are you?' first, just straight into the nosiness.
No I don't know them. We don't have cripple meeting every Thursday.
Am I? I'm inspiring simply because I'm getting on with life?
Oh so there's a reason I'm in pain every day, can't walk, and can't live independently. Please enlighten me!
Yes, more than one stranger has asked me this. The answer is yes. My condition involves no nerve damage, my body is normal, just a lot weaker.
Why does God give away such shitty battles?
This is the most common one I get. At least monthly someone will come up to me while I'm minding my own business, usually touch me, and ask if they can pray for me. I say "I'd rather you do something useful and donate to the labs working on a cure for me'.
Front page edit: Wow! I just made this out of frustration. Didn't realise so many people had experienced similar encounters.
For those of you calling me bitter, fuck yeah I am. Who wouldn't be?
giveittomestraightlikeapearcidermadefrom100percentpears
The only thing ive ever said to a person in a wheelchair was "d'you realise there's a public toilet less than 20 meters from where you are?"
giveittomestraightlikeapearcidermadefrom100percentpears
There was a guy leaning out of his chair, pissing against a wall near Notting Hill station... Actually nearer Portobello... Winds me up.
likebluewaffles
I have a friend who's in a wheelchair, me and her dated briefly. The sex though was amazing.
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
Me dated briefly
thewheelsofpottsy
I'm a 21 year old wheelchair user. A complete stranger walked up to me and said "what do you call a prostitute in a wheelchair?" 1/2
WholesomeCrackwhoresForSale
GODDAMNIT I WANNA HEAR THE PUN
thewheelsofpottsy
Park and ride....yes, park. And. Ride. *sigh* (I did chuckle later on actually....)
WholesomeCrackwhoresForSale
hahaha ty ^^
IMadeThisOnlyForDestinyCodeBegging
Oooh shit... We didn't send you the invitation to the wheelchair races that we hold every Sunday?? Fuck... Gary really dropped the ball here
ScientificHooligan
You mean you don't wheel around in gangs?
RaiXira
If I couldn't walk for whatever reason, I'd try to start a wheelchair gang.
bananasarenotfreee
Crips
PianoMan2112
No, because everybody would be singing "Thry see me rollin', they hatin'..."
rederik13
I see IMGUR is treating you equally, you get the same shit as anyone else.
alliwantispcb
a lot of wacko's tell me "god has a plan for you" when they notice my paralyzed arm. makes me want to punch them with my good arm
RedStarBeograd
You should do it, and say "this was the plan he had for me and the fate for you".
ScaleScentedAnalDildo
"Yes, He was accommodating enough to leave me this" *flips them off with the good hand*
finallancer
Okay how about can -we-have sex? Do you hear that one often?
Spotaholic
My fiance uses a wheelchair. He was dressed in a nice tux one night for a party. After the party, he waited for his ride outside. 1/2
Spotaholic
He had several people come by and give him money while he waited for his ride. He tried refusing many times since he took it as an insult.
bluetractor
That seems odd! Why were they giving him money?
Spotaholic
They assumed that he was poor because he was in a wheelchair.
UseTheSource
Do you look at a lot of butts, especially at concerts etc? My ex was kinda forced to do that (she was in a wheelchair, do you know her?)
CardinalXim
My dad's in a wheelchair, and so claims to be an expert on what sorts of underwear people have on.
ninmonkey
I forgot what page was open when I came back to my computer; So your comment was completely out of context.
UseTheSource
butts are never out of context
BarsnBolts
Yes I do and the concerts/festivals it's an amazing view! Also a lot of females are willing to give lap dances! Source: I'm in a wheelchair
UseTheSource
That does not sound too shabby at all. Next festival I'm going to take out our wheelchair
MiauFrito
Where can I purchase a wheelchair?
CaptainHughJass
I saw one for a hundred bucks at a flea market once.
Mogierk
you got $48,000 just lying around? thats how much mine was
Squeezelor
Do you mind me asking what kind of chair? I'm assuming power for the cost. Got a new one myself and trying to see if I got a good price.
Mogierk
http://www.permobil.com/en-GB/English/C/Products/C500-Corpus-3G1/ i have this or close enough to this one i got mine 4 years ago
MiauFrito
wat, was it one of those rocket powered ones?
Grybush
I had a friend she had no legs and all she really wanted was for people not to act like thats all that she was
QueasyRider
Congrats on the sex!
AwesomeName
No, no, you misheard. The question was "can WE have sex?"
lickingtoads
I was in a wheelchair for nearly a year. Sometimes in the supermarket I'd get up briefly to grab something up tall, and get furious glares.
VetVed
'Phoney!'
NotAgainRichard
"Spina Bifida, not paraplegia, dorks." *throws can of peaches*
lickingtoads
"The power of Poptarts has healed me!"
LearnedCoward
I have a friend of a friend who sometimes uses a wheelchair for heart-related stuff. I saw her get out of it+someone started shouting at her
lickingtoads
I've had people take photos of me on their phones when I do that. Like they're social crusaders or something.
llamallamaredpajama
"Jesus, help me reach the peaches on that high shelf" and then "can I get an amen" when you got them. :)
lickingtoads
"Mein Further! I can valk!"
Room9856
I went to a baseball game and got looks because I stood up for the national anthem.
lickingtoads
Good for you, people are dumb.
TobiBoone
I'm legally blind so have a cane but can see a bit, a stranger accused me of faking when i stopped to answer a text for a ride.
lickingtoads
What a dill hole. That sucks, it's a damn shame some people don't think before opening their mouths.
TobiBoone
I know right? I of course smile and tell them what's what while internally cursing their descendants.
lickingtoads
"May all your children smell like hamsters,"
TobiBoone
"May your children never cease to ask for a pony."
StarPine
YOU MUST BE UNABLE TO MOVE YOU SHAM!!!! /idiot
lickingtoads
FALL OUT AND LIE LIMP ON THE FLOOR LIKE THE WORM YOU ARE.
lickingtoads
That got dark unexpectantly.
CurseUrSuddenButInevitableBetrayal
I'm sure people were trying to be nice (and some ignorant). I see how it can be annoying at times. but the responses comes off a bit bitchy
LucaDan
I am terribly sorry for what you are going through. I really do hope they find a cure.
Room9856
I wouldn't say I'm sorry because they could take that as offensive. I know I do because I'm still alive and know things could be worse.
46853
We are building robotic exoskeletons...
Squeezelor
They already exist, used a lot for spinal injury recovery treatments. Unfortunately not too portable yet.
dawarrior
maybe you're just not invited to the cripple meetings?
TheLordLucifersBannedAccount02
No-one likes @DarwinFinch. No wonder she's not invited to Cripple Meetings.
graehall
She might be a blood.
otakudan
I wonder if they have ginger ale and graham crackers?
FartBoner69
Marshmallows https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zYnEWPs2RCU
diphenhydraminehcl50mg
Just don't mess up and go to the crip meeting across the street. Unless that's how you roll.
EightYearOldsDude
Oh that's good
missladymondegreen
yeah, they're actually on Wednesdays, friend...
MyCatWatchesMeMasturbate
On Wednesdays we wear pink!
objectorbit
I know I am.
objectorbit
OP, I'll pass along the word to make sure you get invited. The cupcake nights are not to be missed!
AloofCylon
Pretty sure they're on the third Tuesday of every month anyways.
ohnonotthisagain
But...Batman...
myrrlyn
Has a crippling addiction. We go for support.
FartSmarterNotHarder
Damnit I knew it!!
TheRealStalinWhoIsStandingUp
i second this
CookiesNCraem
this is them right? http://i221.photobucket.com/albums/dd218/SPORTS123/crips-south-park-t-shirt.jpg
Stoneagedudeman
We had one every wednesday at 1515 on the 4th floor at the hospital i was in. Buncha jokers.
SociallyAwkwardFemale
There are a few of us! I suffered a spinal cord injury and was paralyzed. I was told not to attend meetings 1/2
echocall
She's probably like lame ass Christopher Reeve, not crippled from birth.
AirplaneRaces
So you're saying that being crippled due to an accident or disease of some sort is lame?
turokcito
It's a reference for a South Park Episode.
AirplaneRaces
So I was told.
Snarknado
Quite literally
AirplaneRaces
Well played, take my +1.
myrrlyn
I mean, yeah, in this case it literally is
AirplaneRaces
...Well played sir. +1.
ChasePoppins
It's a southpark episode....
AirplaneRaces
That... Would explain it. I have never watched that series. Forgive me @echocall D:
HaveGinWillBabble
you're not missing much.
ohnonotthisagain
HET GUYS, I FOUND THE RATIONAL ADULT PEOPLE!!!
SociallyAwkwardFemale
for spinal cord injury patients because I was successfully-ish starting to move my legs and walk again. 2/2
Griffinator96
I believe that was done in south park. Didn't end well.
Ohhhlookaunicorneatingasamurai
Wheelchair Wednesdays at Steak and Shake.... Oh I see why she doesn't go.
Ohhhlookaunicorneatingasamurai
Wheelchair Wednesdays at Steak and Shake.... Oh I see why she doesn't go.
DorLugas
Comments like this is why I imgur.
DragonOnSteroids
You have to apply to applications@illuminati.com
LearnedCoward
http://www.illuminatiofficial.org/join-the-illuminati-members/
krauraurgg
wheelluminati.com*
SilverWingsofMorning
dude, that's a lamp store. they sell lamps.
PiccPicceringtonVonChesterburgElderberryTheThirdEsquire
Man that's a front. You need to know the secret chandelier order to get into the back.
SpoonOfDoom
"Yeah, I'd like to have three chandeliers, please. And could you please ship them in a... *triangular* package?"
Ohhhlookaunicorneatingasamurai
What front? I just got my new suit from Kingsman, like it?
PinkFloydianSlip
They do have a Kingsman collection of attire. http://www.mrporter.com/mens/designers/kingsman
SilverWingsofMorning
Ms Chandelier Bong
FXTPD
I got invited to a crips meeting before, some guys in red clothing shot at us and nobody was even crippled...
FXTPD
2/2 Yes its a south park reference, new shitty android app doesn't let me copy and paste, so I can't post a link to an image.
IMakeLotsOfReferencesAndRemakes
It's true. We heard that one guy tell her how lucky they was to able to sit all day and figured she was okay without us.
Thoraxe123
im not gonna lie, a cripple me sounds rather violent
CrippledCentipede
first time i'm half relevant for something hehe... sorry
JrElmoe
OP has too much bloods in him/her
NightsKing
As a cancer patient, I've been told all these things except the sitting down thing
TraitorousTrump3
"Am I? I'm inspiring simply because I'm getting on with life?" Yes, yes you are.
Halfsharkhalfbee
Not anywhere near the same awfulness as cancer but fertility issues get many of the same responses
PussyGotYourTongue
Mental illness gets the same sort of reactions. People see the scars? Here we go again...
TobiBoone
Legally blind and have cp, god can take his big plan and give it to someone less lazy then me.
LearnedCoward
As an autistic person, I've also been asked everything except #2. I've even been asked #7.
DarkUranium
Neither was OP ever asked #2. I mean, it's an observation, not a question ... can't really ask an observation.
NightsKing
http://media2.giphy.com/media/11TT5yMvJ3btU4/giphy.gif
LearnedCoward
Pretty much.
llamallamaredpajama
I had to go back and count them to make sure someone really asked you if you could have sex... wow
RickyBobbyShakenBake
ugh fuck cancer.... I hope that you are coping well and are being loved lots.
NightsKing
I'm actually doing great. I was done with with chemo and radiation therapy 6 months ago :)
EscargatoireMunch
No, I think he was asking #7.
RickyBobbyShakenBake
Great news!!! hope you're feeling like yourself again! :)
NightsKing
I'm feeling great :) I finally got my hair and beard back!
theycallmeMrGlass
At least you can have sex, which is nice.
flyinghamstick
I'm reminded of that short film with Michael Cera as a cripple who tries to have sex with a woman. Makes me feel sad.
RuptlyTV
at the cripple meetings
Kargathia
... I honestly have to say I have wondered about that before.
VitriolicGhost
Me too.
TheWorldMayNeverKnow
It really depends on the person.
Kargathia
The answer will change, but I certainly wasn't surprised more forthright (and less tactful) people than me went ahead and asked.
vinctell
I hear a few of these too, just because I'm a lesbian. But "Can you have sex" turns into "How do homosexual men have sex". Uhm... idk?
46853
Butts
akki14
"together"
makescreamogreatagain
"Well I imagine it's a lot like any other kind of sex. There's foreplay, insertion of the bad dragon, leather, the usual Christian stuff."
EscargatoireMunch
Like this? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjnrLt3VuSM
astropapi1
I knew it would be this video, fucking love it!
PianoMan2112
To be fair, men have both of the usually required parts, so it's easier to figure out.
llamallamaredpajama
"in da butt" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-qc-ntq5qw
Astrogod07
We take off all our clothes, get into bed, and then we shit all over the bible. True story. Every night.
VitriolicGhost
Omg I knew it.
Weddell
...sensual.
RedStarBeograd
that's hot yo
JamesBluntThatSmartassCunt
Then we jizz on it.
MyHeadsLoud
I have invisible illnesses. They come with some surprisingly similar issues but more disbelief. Sometimes im envious of you.
BareLulz
Oh, you don't look disabled/whatever your dx is. Yeah, umm what am I meant to say?
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
But you look so healthy!
thewheelsofpottsy
2/2 "park and ride!" He then tried to sit on my lap asked me out. Is that really your best chat-up line?
Salpinus
PLEASE post the 2/2 in a reply to the first comment. And no, he wasn't classy at all. A proper chat up line would be somewhere along 1/2
yogurtisthespawnofsatan
I had an adventure trying to find this part of your story. I met Carmen sandiego along the way.
thewheelsofpottsy
Yeah sorry, the app messed up majorly when I was trying to post reply to my part 1 with part 2, always happens when you don't want it to, eh
WholesomeCrackwhoresForSale
I found Madeleine McCann
thewheelsofpottsy
Yeah sorry, the app messed up majorly when I was trying to post reply to my part 1 with part 2, always happens when you don't want it to, eh
GlitterInTheDarkNearTheTannhauserGate
First thing I thought of http://www.ted.com/talks/stella_young_i_m_not_your_inspiration_thank_you_very_much
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
I love Ted talks.
Gilbot9000
Commenting here so I can watch this later.
kendermouse
Don't you just /love/ the "god will cure you" ones? Those are the ones that make me want to rip my ears off and throw them at the speaker.
StarkkMed
As a religious person, I hate those too - they are not sensical at all.
LearnedCoward
Most of these are people believing in the Just World Fallacy, mixed with pity porn.
DarkUranium
kendermouse
http://img.pandawhale.com/87523-Doctor-Who-upvote-gif-Imgur-kCZb.gif
AParticularlyAverageWank
What's so wrong about it? Maybe they're trying to give OP hope that one day they'd be well?
MimzytheBun
Because its incredibly presumptuous to tell someone the magic man in the sky did it and they should be happy for that fact alone.
AParticularlyAverageWank
I'm talking about the meaning behind the statement. They're basically saying that things would get better. I don't see how that's bad.
sillyblackcat
It also leads to some victim blaming. If God didn't cure you its somehow your fault since he cured me etc.
MimzytheBun
The sentiment may be well meaning but its condescending to tell a non-religious logical adult they should be happy bc you believe God did it
AParticularlyAverageWank
Yet again, I'm talking about the basic meaning of the statement. If you want to focus on the religious part and ignore rest, then so be it.
ATimeTravellingRobotFromTheFuture
Saying that Odin will cure them of a very real medical condition gives no hope. The All-father is fantasy to many and "one day" is too vague
Barman42
Though I'm not sure Mjolnir to the back would help...
Barman42
To be fair, Odin *did* cure the world of frost giants.
DarkUranium
AParticularlyAverageWank
It's encouragement, is what my point is. If someone told me things would get better, I'd be thankful for that. Not be a prick about it.
davepermen
Everyone who tells me with a certainty (esp based on faith) that life gets better can fuck off. It might, it might not. They don't know.
GetYourPantsOffNow
Giving false hope is a dick move. I get that they're trying to be nice but supporting them is the best way.
AParticularlyAverageWank
Of course supporting them is the best way, but the hope is not false. Maybe they WILL get better.
skunkydrunk
abled body people don't understand, it's not like they called you hurtful names. while stupid, they mean well.
TobiBoone
I agree, it isn't cruelty as much as ignorance.
CandidGamera
There's a German figure of speech that translates to something like "The opposite of 'doing good' is 'meaning well'"
sciencemech
They should also know that disabled people are people and still deserve respect/privacy lol
TheLordLucifersBannedAccount02
Oh don't be stupid. No-one deserves privacy. Right @NSA?
DarkUranium
So, Lucifer is in league with the NSA ... why am I not surprised?
balthcat
Some above are clearly not "meaning well" they're being careless. Like "what's wrong with you" without a greeting first. It's rude.
LearnedCoward
Last time I broke my arm, I've had random strangers come up to me and ask me how I broke it, without any conversation whatsoever.
balthcat
That's arguably curiosity, not caring. It MIGHT be bad conversation skills trying to be social. But it might be rude curiosity.
Elroydb
Most people aren't stupid. They don't know any better. My brother was in a wheelchair and I still stepped on his toes more than once
DrCaticus
yeah, my best friend is in a wheelchair, the best thing to do is to get to know them. their usually much different than you would think.
beautifulpeanutbutter
I'm able bodied and probably ignorant, but I think most of those are well-intentioned and ok, except for the touching to pray.
YouCantKeepJetpackingAwayFromYourProblemsBrian
Well-intentioned, yes, but I can see how it would get annoying when it happens all the time.
BareLulz
Matthew6-6: When you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. IE No showboating.
StarkRG
Meaning well is not enough. Stupid people should endeavour to be less stupid.
ElNein5
I think the problem is they don't know they're stupid, generally
StarkRG
Hmm, that is a conundrum. It's too bad there isn't some kind of government-sponsored program that could provide knowledge and skills...
ElNein5
I admit, I am only familiar with the American schooling system
flipx99
School only teaches facts, many of which are useless. I'd certainly would have taken a social skills class if my high school offered it.
StarkRG
School definitely doesn't teach facts, or it didn't when I was there (it was terrible back then, but I think it's worse now)
StarkRG
For example they teach critical thinking and how to apply knowledge and skills to things they weren't originally used for.
CPatricoo
Yea I dont need to offer classes on not being awkward. Shit happens yo.
StarkRG
They shouldn't be offered they should be fucking mandatory.
StarkRG
Also it's not about not begin awkward, it's about not being stupid and not being an asshole.
Its1111MakeAWish
I've heard the pray for you comment makes a lot of people angry, but they're appealing to the highest power they believe in...for you (1/2)
itsamazing
I've been on both the giving and receiving end of the 'pray for you' one and I learned very quickly how insulting it could be
Room9856
People prayed for me while I was in the hospital I am a skeptic but if they want to pray for me I don't get bitter about it.
usernameisrightjustified
They can pray without announcing it to the world. It's like they want brownie points.
BareLulz
Matthew 6:6
Ophilia
God knows everything, He already know whats happening Or is he the ultimate bureaucrat and does nothing without an official request?
Its1111MakeAWish
I've never thought about it that way, but that's not what I think. There may be some who think that, though. Seems a bit cynical to me.
Mos2414
Everyone is different, but my prayers are usually appeals to receive the strength to deal with a certain outcome. I don't ask for God to...
Mos2414
change the circumstances. It's a cop-out.
typingtreemonkey
Just because the intention was good, doesn't mean it's not irritating and sometimes rude. This isn't like the holiday greetings debate.
Its1111MakeAWish
I have a hard time believing it's rude. Like I said, thoughtful intention. Just let people be, y'know? If THEY want to pray, there's no harm
typingtreemonkey
Why share it? Can they not pray for someone without broadcasting the intention? Why not let that stranger who's tired of it be?
typingtreemonkey
"I mean well, so be grateful instead of resentful when I go up to you and pity you or make you a martyr without knowing anything about you"
Its1111MakeAWish
It's not an act that's supposed to be done out of pity. If that's ever happened to you, I'm sorry on behalf of that person. ):
Its1111MakeAWish
So honestly, it shouldn't matter if you believe/think it's nice/not, they're being nice, just say thank you, and move on from the subject.
Acalia
I've had people say that they'll pray when my parents passed. I always thought it was a nice gesture, regardless of me not being religious.
Its1111MakeAWish
That's what it's intended to be!
Protean2648
Why do they ask permission? Because it's not about the praying, it's about showing how devout and nice person they are, just to pray for you
Protean2648
And as a former cancer patient: Fuck them. They want to help? Start supporting stem-cell research. Prayers don't feed me.
Its1111MakeAWish
But I don't think people ask that to prove a point...
Its1111MakeAWish
I suppose that depends on the person in question. I don't think you'll find a general answer for that.
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
I'm an atheist and Christians ask all the time if they can pray for me and I'm like I can't stop you but it seems like a waste of 5 minutes.
serpentinebaboo
That's pretty rude of you. Just be thankful they care about you enough to do that. Even if you think it's pointless, it's an act of love.
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
I just tell them that I can't stop them but it seems like a waste of time to me. It's rude to me that they are trying to reconvert me
AxelBeingCivil
Are they being nice, though? If all it does is make you feel like people see you as an object of pity, not a human being, is that nice?
Its1111MakeAWish
I hardly think it's being a good Christian if someone prays for you because they pity you. It's supposed to be a nice gesture.
leafspring
I'm sorry but half of those sound like you're projecting your own anger onto others who are simply curious or even trying to be courteous.
Trianglesandwitchesarebetter
Yeah the last one surprised me. It was just someone offering the most valuable thing they have..their faith.
PeanutButterSandwitch
Yeah but a stranger coming up and just offering to pray for you instead of someone you know or at least talked with sounds uncomfortable
backtobackpanicattack
I'm about 25-40% with ya, but I reckon hearing some of these for the gazillionth time is going to wear down anyone's patience.
balthcat
"Oh it didn't scan? It must be free!"
babbzilla
If phrased properly and coming up organically in conversation, I wouldn't really consider it rude to ask how they got to be in a wheelchair.
babbzilla
I can see how it would get annoying to have to repeat the answer. But I get curious about people when I talk to them. Getting to know them.
SlapMySalmons
She doesn't have to be an asshole about it. Like that last one, what if they're poor..it's the thought that counts
itsbre
Exactly. 5,6,8, and 9 areppl being caring. It may get annoying, but its not their fault your angry; they're trying to make u feel better
kapitanextreme
Yeah cause a person in a wheelchair is a curiosity to be prodded like a museum exhibit
leafspring
Anything that is different from the usual sparks curiosity, nothing bad or malicious about that as long as you're respectful about it. 1/2
leafspring
Which some of the examples clearly are not, no doubt about that. 2/2
TineyTurtle
i don't know, man... most of these are pretty rude things to ask a stranger out of the blue
twentysomething
I think when people constantly look at you and see a disability instead of a person, you have a right to be a little angry.
AxelBeingCivil
This! A thousand times this! A little sympathy is nice but too much and you feel like that's all people see.
Shalako1
It's okay the first hundred times but half way through your life time it gets a little grating. Sure it's the 1st thing people notice but...
StarPine
THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS that.
Shalako1
No one likes being reminded every time they meet someone new how different they are from the rest of humanity.
[deleted]
[deleted]
Shalako1
oh I wasn't disagreeing with @leafspring I was just explaining why someone would be jaded.
PikaCheck
My son has Cerebral Palsy and I hate it when people tell me I'm lucky because I don't have to chase him everywhere. Fucking assholes.
TobiBoone
Then my parents were extra lucky, I have cp and am legally blind!
PikaCheck
So kind of you to be such a considerate child.
TobiBoone
I know right? Not only did they never have to chase me but I'd never wander more than arms length!
PikaCheck
I would give anything to see him walk and not have to worry about whether he'll be able to live independently when he's an adult.
StarPine
Hello (minor) Cerebral Palsy buddy! Are you going to the meeting this Wednesday? When I say "dancing makes me nervous" they have no clue.
onecupshort
Wow. People are so out of touch to say crap like that.
PikaCheck
I've talked to another parent who said an elderly man told her he'd rather smother his child to death than raise one with CP.
onecupshort
Wow
PikaCheck
I think for the most part people are trying to be supportive by pointing out the "bright side" of things, but they don't always think first.
PikaCheck
Granted, you still run across truly hurtful and ignorant people- but fortunately it's not as common today as it once might have been.
onecupshort
When my sister in law had a miscarriage a lot of well meaning people said horrible things. I just wanted to yell "think first!"
IronMannequinMrkXXI
#3 Is that not synonymous to anyone being asked why they're sick, or how they got injured? It doesn't seem nosy, just curious.
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
1Not comparable but I'm mixed race and sometimes the first thing people say is "what are you" they don't greet me or anything just establish
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
2 that I'm different. Usually I respond with American b/c it gets people flustered. Still just asking without anything else seems rude.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
I just see it as a curious question. Some people don't want to say that you're different, they're just interested in where you're from.
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
But asking "what are you" as opposed to "what ethnicity are you" is fucking rude.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
If they ask "what are you", you don't even know if they're asking about ethnicity. Could be asking if you're a Stormcloak or an Imperial.
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
Yes yes I do know. I've been on the receiving end of that question my entire life. When I say "American" they say 'oh I meant your race"
2b87
If it's the first thing people say, then you're being defined as somebody with something wrong, not a person.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
That's like saying if someone asks your name first, you're being defined by a name, not as a person. It's a part of you, not apart of you.
Room9856
Yeah they should probably at least try to talk to them before asking.
Room9856
I prefer a person ask me what happened over giving me weird looks. I know people are curious. At least I am.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
If someone's staring at you like a moldy piece of gum then that's rude, but curiosity needs to put the knife away and stop killing kittens!
Room9856
Yeah but that person is rude to anyone they're doing that too
IronMannequinMrkXXI
No, I meant that it's okay to be curious, just don't treat someone like dirt in the process.
Room9856
Oh gotcha
everythingisnominal
well, i don't know you, but if i went to ask a stranger why he's sick, he would tell me to mind my own business and i woulnd't blame him
everythingisnominal
; sometimes it's just better not to ask and roll with it...
IronMannequinMrkXXI
On the off-chance that you do ask, it would be better if they didn't assume you're treating them as something less than them, instead of 1/2
IronMannequinMrkXXI
just asking a simple question. 2/2
BareLulz
It's because people see the chair, not the person.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
If I saw a chair instead of a person, why would I bother to ask the chair what happened? It's more because they care.
Squeezelor
(1/2) It's the phrasing that rubs the wrong way with me when people ask me. I'm aware there's genetically something "wrong" but I'm still
Squeezelor
(2/2) a normal person in my own eyes. If they asked "Why are you disabled?" that is better, still not a great question to ask immediately.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
If I had swine flu and someone asked me why I had a protective mask on, I wouldn't tell them to stop being nosy. I'd tell them the truth.
LearnedCoward
I would cough on them.
EscargatoireMunch
No one cared who I was until I put on the mask. -- Stephen Hawking Maybe
DarkUranium
Stephenman... no --- Hawkman?
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missladymondegreen
2/2 if i don't answer i'm a bitter jerk. there is no winning.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
Maybe I just have no soul, but when I was stuck in a wheel-chair I didn't feel bad. In my mind what was done was done, and nothing could 1/2
IronMannequinMrkXXI
reverse it. 2/2
IronMannequinMrkXXI
Nothing but time.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
Besides, I sawed that damn tree in half and made a bonfire when I got my legs back. I'm still working on how to saw gravity in half, though.
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IronMannequinMrkXXI
The people asking what happened aren't always being rude, but it's okay to punch someone if they're looking at your kid with disgust.
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IronMannequinMrkXXI
And that doesn't just apply to kids with injuries. Any kid deserves to see someone kicked in the berries if the person is acting disgusted.
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sillyblackcat
Think about the answers: "I have a cold" vs "I have a serious disease"/"I have been in fucked up accident". People have right to privacy
IronMannequinMrkXXI
And people also have the right to be curious without unknowingly being branded as a nosy asshole.
sillyblackcat
I'm curious why this girl at work is no longer engaged - my right. Yet I am not going to ask her about it - not my right. we're not friends
IronMannequinMrkXXI
You don't think you have the right to ask a question? Some people want to be asked, but you'll never find out unless you try.
sillyblackcat
If we ever talked for longer than a minute then sure. I respect others privacy. Don't ask strangers very personal Questions out of nowhere
IronMannequinMrkXXI
Who knows? Maybe asking will lead to comforting, which may lead to friendship, and thankfulness for taking an interest in her life.
emuthegreen
Would you go up to a bald stranger and ask how chemo was going?
LearnedCoward
People with alopecia get this all the time.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
That's a stupid comparison. The stranger could simply have just lost his hair. Someone didn't wake up one day fused to a wheelchair.
LearnedCoward
If they don't know you from Adam and wouldn't ordinarily say a single word to you, then it's being nosy.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
Unless they're just using it to spark up a conversation with you.
LearnedCoward
In which case, they want to talk to you. Still, I would choose a less awkward conversation opener.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
It's only awkward if you feel insecure about it. Why feel insecure? The people you know will understand, and the people you don't you 1/2
IronMannequinMrkXXI
probably won't see again. 2/2
LearnedCoward
From any one person, it doesn't bother me that much. But from many people over the course of 30 years? 60 years? (1/2)
LearnedCoward
I won't blame people for not knowing each and every little right thing to say, but some proper judgment is appreciated.(3/2)
LearnedCoward
This stuff builds up, and there are certain issues that may be sensitive.(2/2)
politicalhack
Asking how someone broke their arm and what condition/disease makes you wheelchair bound your entire life are not the same thing.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
Why not? If the defense is that you're a person, too, then I'm going to treat you and the guy in the cast just the same as any other person.
Room9856
People aren't all the same. Hell some people think you're weird for even talking to them.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
Any other person, I'd ask them about their condition, and wouldn't give them the cold shoulder if they got curious about what makes me me.
politicalhack
It's just a much more sensitive issue.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
Why would you ask to be treated regularly, and then ask of people to treat a certain part of who you are in a special manner?
politicalhack
I'm not asking anything. I'm saying how I feel as an able bodied person.
IronMannequinMrkXXI
"Treat me like a regular person." Well, I'm going to be curious towards a "regular person", too.
CoconutCyclone
You're going to walk up to a "regular person", randomly in public, and ask them a personal question with no other introduction?
DavidAmazing
As someone who is too awkward to figure it out on my own; if we're headed in the same direction, is it rude to ask if you want a push?
jillton
You just reminded me of my friend who took a guy (in a wheelchair) out of the nightclub we were in and pushed him around the hotel lobby...
CPatricoo
It was never awkward for me to push someone I casually knew in a wheelchair. I cant possibly see me offering it to people I didnt know.
AtlantisSkye
If it looks like the person is struggling, I ask if they need help. Usually they're grateful.
Crowlands
I've been asked by someone in a wheelchair user to help her up a hill. Usually, if they want/need help, people will ask.
Iwanttowakeup
Yeah... My friend go yelled at by a girl in a wheelchair when he held a door for her. I guess she was already having a bad day :(
iguessidontknowhowtospellimaganative
Had a coworker on crutches do this to me. She had surgery or some ahit, and I hold the door for anyone. Real fucking awkward
ibelieveicanwalk
Better to ask than to just do it. I hate people "helping" without asking. Most wheelchair users will ask for help if they need it.
screemonster
I remember reading about someone who didn't let go of the wheels fast enough and broke a finger when someone "helped" her without warning.
ibelieveicanwalk
Plausible. The worst is the sudden feeling of loosing control, like suddenly falling.
screemonster
Comparable to first time on a motorbike when you're used to a pedal cycle? Having it pull forward under me was definitely disconcerting.
ibelieveicanwalk
More like when you walk down steps thinking there are no more steps but there are one more. Except worse and more annoying.
caycaymcay
I use a wheelchair and I don't think it's rude to ask. Just respect when the answer is no. Some people don't and it's really scary.
plainoldusername
After that he got really excited every time he saw me on campus and would go out of his way to come talk to me. (2/2)
Troniac
Aww, how nice. =D
HarryDresdenIsMySpiritAnimal
Probably nicer than asking if you can ride in their lap.
Ambooty
There was this man in Rome who played techno music from his electric wheelchair that could be heard 50 ft away, so everyone heard him 1/2
Ambooty
2/2 and got out of his way and smiled at him as he went by :)
fartalert
Yes is this OK? Seems awkward, but fun
unclescientist
As a wheelchair user, I hate when smone pushes me on the flat ground. Don't forget, that pushing urself is exercise as for healthies walking
ChasePoppins
Wait. Is that what Chairies call able bodied ppl... Healthies! Fucking love it. (P.s. I'm now using Chairies :)
unclescientist
Haha :D Blame symbol limit) I wanted to write healthy people, but it didn't fit))
2b87
I'm a wheelchair user, and yes it is, "we" can ask for ourselves, now if we are really struggling, and you ask, and we say no accept that no
GitToDaChoppa
wut
2b87
We can ask for help if we want/need it
FelixG
Having known a person in a wheelchair and asked this question: Only if you are friends with the person or if they are having issues.
ArthurBooRadley
Have lived surrounded by people in wheelchairs. Usually if it seems to you that they're struggling, then just ask if you can help.
spikytortoise
I was always taught a wheelchair should be considered an extension to the 'body', and you don't touch unless invited. Is that wrong?
BareLulz
Nah, thats right brah.
meccit
Not rude to ask anything, but maybe making assumptions on what a wheelchair user needs though. If you DON'T ask and push, it's kidnapping...
utahsoprano
As someone who works in a nursing home...always encourage people be as independent as they can be.
CandidGamera
I'd ask if I could offer help (not "a push") if the person is visibly struggling or in distress.
AlpinestarRidingDouche
I onced pushed someone up a hill, and he thanked me for it. I felt great, ha.
practicalfrost
it is rude. if we need help we'll ask it.
YouCantKeepJetpackingAwayFromYourProblemsBrian
I don't. I figure if they would like help, they'll ask. I'll hold open the door without asking but I do that for everyone anyway.
M00N3EAM
In my sister's case, you have to be really fucking close. Like bfffl. Or else you make her feel like she's not moving fast enough
BareLulz
Yes it is.
captlush
The people who get offended when others go out of their way to do something good for them are insecure
flamingflamingo
That sounds like it would be really creepy.
unresponsivenipples
My roommate in college said it's cool but not to push her like a maniac.She said a lot of people suddenly start Tokyo driftin her wheelchair
tpkraft
How Paul walker got his start.
scabab
I did this when i was young and stupid and the wheelchairee got scared and jumped out -_-
gimmecoffee
Wait a minute.... He jumped out??!!
orkestrzhopa
did you miss the part where people with weaker bodies also use wheelchairs, not just those who are paralyzed?
scabab
yeah he jumped out and landed on concrete and idk i think i just walked away...
norill
It's never rude to offer help. Except when it's rude.
Shinotsa
Unless you're experienced with doing so, I'd say not. You'd be surprised how easy it is to bang their toes or hit the brake/wheel on some
plainoldusername
When I was in college there was a steep sidewalk. A kid was wheeling up it one day and was struggling so I pushed him up the walk. (1/2)
SluttyToast
He told me that he was steeply in my debt. Never saw him again. (2/2)
scabab
-_-
UserSubrero
Lmao holy shit! I didn't even realize plainold didn't say this! I had to come back after I saw his reply down below and I thought wtf...LOL
SluttyToast
,':)
AgamemnonsMemes
I would also like to push you, perhaps up a hill and down the other side and ride on the back and go WEEEEEEE.. Is this inappropriate?
Pseudomenos
It never is
Chistoid
If some random person in a wheelchair asked me to do that, I'd make him or her my new best friend.
cocoakoumori
Did that to my dad. We nearly died a few times. Worth it.
HelloIsThisWorking
Propably falls into a same category as if you asked someone can you hold their hand while walking to the same direction
ChainsawHandsJoe
I assume he meant if you're friends.
balthcat
I would hold someone's hand if they could drag me along without causing significant discomfort. I don't think that's a good comparison.
AnimosityTowardTheContrivance
...should I stop doing that?
Rimasticus
I didn't mind at all...but really, no number. :(
ColonelCouch
You. I like you.
aShogunNamedMarcus
Also, if you're in an electric wheelchair, is it rude for me to walk like this behind you?
SomethingCleverBand
I'd say it's pretty much mandatory.
TellusEidolon
That Is a glorious gif. Gave me a good chuckle.
AngelsinmyMouthfield
So glad the song is in my head now
koflan
I was so hoping it was that gif
Istealfromthefrontpage
Hold on that shit is funny as hell to me let's play that again
MyHouseOnMars
Gotta play fitting music to go with it though.
TheBMachine
I'd probably have a good laugh, then back up when you're suspecting it the least.
Pokelad
You. I like you.
UnrulyCactus
I'm not in a wheelchair and I would be flattered if people walked behind me like that.
QuantumSupersexposition
As long as you are dressed in exactly the same outfit as is illustrated, yes.
TheWorstPirateYouHaveEverHeardOf
I could get an outfit and do this if you are in a wheel chair :D been tempted to do this for a long time now!
QuantumSupersexposition
Rimasticus
What about hitching a ride?
Laimbrane
This is why Imgur is amazing. +1
dreidle
I was briefly in a wheelchair and I personally felt it was awkward if I didn't obviously need assistance. ie rough terrain bad icy patch
clutchthepearls
ass N titties...ass N titties
NineByNine
only if you aren't dressed exactly like that.
OkSureNoProblem
Would definitely have you in my entourage.
swatz
Maybe, when you could do it in front and lead the way. :)
WhereOnceThereWasAYachtNowThereIsNot
I don't know any wheelchair users, but unless struggling, I'd NEVER offer that. Be like asking a short person if they want to be carried.
VitriolicGhost
Okay that made me laugh out loud.
voodooprayer
In a wheelchair. Agree very strongly with this sentiment
blankeyed
As a short guy I want a mother fucking shoulder ride .
PicturesfromPaddy
I want to be carryied!
docsierra
Short female here. Carry me around all you want!
spunzombie
Wait , so .. I am not supposed to offer the midgets piggybacks ? This explains so much.
Mustacheuaquestion
Dude, fucking carry me. I'm tired.
SSColonelHansLanda
As a short guy, who told you we don't want to be carried? We really dig it if you offered to carry us on your shoulders
iLoveItWhenMyFingersSmellLikePussy
BUT WHAT IF THEY REALLY LIKE THAT?!
SomeGeographer
I'm a very short female and i'll take a piggy back ride any day of the week!
schmobius
I've always wanted a jet pack.
IusedtobeapervertIstillambutIusedtobetoo
I'm 6'6" how you doin? ;)
WhereOnceThereWasAYachtNowThereIsNot
As I told others, y'should probably ask for it. If it happens without asking, they probably aren't carrying you somewhere nice...
Grimrir
I would love the opportunity to carry people around. most of the time I have excess energy to burn and people nice enough to ask? done.
jrau18
But what if I WANT to carry them!?
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jrau18
Not at all..
WhereOnceThereWasAYachtNowThereIsNot
Was taking the piss but everyone seems to think my tongue out smiley'd post was legitimately accusing you of rape... jokes don't read well
DragonLordG
N… no. Asking if you can carry them because you want to carry them is the opposite of how rapists think.
WhereOnceThereWasAYachtNowThereIsNot
I was implying (as a joke, obvs) that his comment came off more like "I want to carry them more than I care for their opinion on the matter"
chloramphenicolderivative
not really rapelogic to ask if they want to be carried?
WhereOnceThereWasAYachtNowThereIsNot
Christ kids, chill, I was shooting the shit. Tongue out smiley and everything! Bloody sensitive souls, you lot
WhereOnceThereWasAYachtNowThereIsNot
Apparently no one got/found the joke I was making funny so fuck it, buhleated.
CarlosPerfectHair
As a short guy...yes I do.
DrKriegersClone
http://38.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7qahjQS5e1r0wb4wo4_250.gif ?
Grimrir
bruh, Hop on. I skipped leg day and some extra weight training can be made up anywhere.
CarlosPerfectHair
Yay! I'm helping!
suomynonA
CarlosPerfectHair
Yup, that'll do it!
TheWorldMayNeverKnow
I wouldn't mind Fabio carrying me around everywhere.
suomynonA
me neither
WilhelmvonSchlapphand
As a tall guy, I need you as a flagger so that I don't run into other short people when I walk around corners. I don't want to walk into ppl
Snooj
Guys, Fox is pretty desperate, you might make a series out of this.
CarlosPerfectHair
I'm down but we need a name for it.
CarlosPerfectHair
I don't know quite what you mean by 'flagger'. It sounds kinda kinky but I'm willing to hear you out.
WilhelmvonSchlapphand
It's that like that truck that drive in front of wide load trucks, those are "flaggers", which are different from floggers. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
EmergencyAbortionSavingsAccount
I wish people would offer me piggy back rides
molestmymonkey
OP seems bitter at those who might be concerned. I understand some of these, but the way some of these are worded, especially the last one.
molestmymonkey
Kind of reminds me of the kid with the upside down face in family guy.
mycoffeeartjourney
Depends on your belief. I'm pretty sure I don't need someone giving their meal to Vishnu cos I have a cold
molestmymonkey
I'm diabetic but I don't complain because people go buy candy instead of giving money to the CDA or something.
Sacurason
I don't think being diabetic attracts the same amount of attention as a wheelchair, unless you have other complications. When you hear...
Sacurason
...the same useless platitudes over and over again, it gets old.
molestmymonkey
That comment was based on the last post in this submission, asking people to give money instead of praying.
cocoakoumori
With the last one, I feel like y not both? I'm agnostic but flattered as hell when people ask if they can pray for me. Depends on situation.
molestmymonkey
Instead of being bitter about people wanting to help out, yeah, why not ask them if they can make a donation too.
cocoakoumori
Exactly. I think it's really sweet tbh. But then, there is also the "You must have done something and God's punishing you" prayer. Not cool.
molestmymonkey
Couldn't have said it better myself in 140 characters or less.