UpvoteFairy3001
244138
7556
812
Before I get into this, I know not all women are guilty. Please don't crucify me.
My boyfriend and I were on a date, when I handed over my card to pay at the bar, I was told "you should be making your man pay for this." First of all it was his birthday and I wanted to go out. Second I have money. I hate how some women think that their boyfriend should pay for everything they want. Hair, nails, clothes, everything. I don't buy my boyfriend his shoes and he doesn't pay for my hair appointments. It just pisses me off so much. If I want to go out, I don't expect to get my meal/drinks/movie ticket paid for. I simply do not understand people who expect everything handed to them on a silver platter because their boyfriend has a job. If you're old enough to go on a date, then you're old enough to pay for your damn self.
/Rant over
FP Edit: yeehaw front page. Thank you guys for not calling me an idiot and sharing your "I once dated this bitch" stories. All I want is for men and women to have the same manners. I hope you all have a wonderful day
Edit 2: I'm trying to upvote everyone's comments, even those I disagree with (it's kinda in the name) but there are so many. To clarify some things: we don't split 50/50 I pay for my stuff and he pays for his. There are always exceptions for the rule. Also this isn't nearly as unpopular as I thought it would be, it's the upper middle class girl friends of mine that made me think I was crazy. They've been handed everything and that's what I always see in movies.
raosion
I don't think this is that controversial an opinion, except among traditionalist.
JubleEarly
OldHansLanda
NotSoArtzie
AidenT92
Story of my life
BillogUncle
My girlfriend and I have an agreement where I'll pay one date and she'll pay the next, within reason.
Evelae
My bf and I did this as well. One of us would pay for the meal, then the other would pay the next time.
Derfalke
I do that with my roommate. You pick, you pay, and we alternate picking places.
GoldenSun3DS
You're dating your roommate?
DatBlackDude
Isn’t that just marriage ?
sarcasticresponse
Marriage is just dating with extra steps
Idontlikemyusernamesoimchangingit
That's how my husband and I did it. Over time the more your finances mingle, the more casual it becomes as well. I'll pay for things if (1/2
Idontlikemyusernamesoimchangingit
I have more on hand, and vice versa; and just swap money between us for various bills if need be. Separate accounts still, autonomy is good.
Nemi12
Why is it that whenever I see an unpopular opinion puffin on the front page, it never actually contains an unpopular opinion?
UpvoteFairy3001
Bc unpopular opinions are unpopular. I legitimately did feel as though others wouldn't agree with me considering my girl friends dont
mandadadada
If you want real unpopular opinions you should look at what's getting ultra downvoted at usersub. Not FP
ManMashine
Because this is Imgur. Nobody wants to hear or see anything that throws them out of their comfort zone of entitlement.
RatoMolhado
a) I think it's a rather popular opinion b) Fuck whomever said that
grobesviech
I'm so charmed by the correct use of 'whom'
RatoMolhado
Fumbleskunk
I think it's indicative of a healthy relationship when each partner volunteers to pay for about half of the expenses
ThisUsernamelsNotAvailable
I've felt almost forced to pay the whole bill before by people serving my girlfriend and I before. I find it extremely rude from a stranger.
amoeba15
Next time look 'em right in the eye and say "This is a business dinner meeting. I'm the client."
ThisUsernamelsNotAvailable
Hahaha good idea
KyloSolo
I went to dinner with a girl friend, both agreed it was not a date and we’d go Dutch. Later heard she was mad at me for “making” her pay :/
Uisap
Or she was hoping that you would pay and thus showing interest in her?
KyloSolo
She wasn’t my type.
HoboTerry
Shut up!
ManMashine
explain "going dutch" pls. Is this like "going commando"?
willi828
Splitting the bill
ManMashine
Ah, thanks for clearing this up :)
Aeriys
Dodged a bullet mate
KyloSolo
I guess, I just found it weird that she told people I made her pay when we made it clear we’d go Dutch.
BigSoftie
You sure she wasn't mad at making her pay for your expensive taste? Just cuz splitting the bill should not always go halfway.
powershit
Pay separately yo
lookingOknaked
Where I'm from, splitting the bill means everyone pays their own shit.
FuckYeahImAwesome
That makes sense. One time, friends wanted me to split and pay £30 when Id spent £13. I said no.
KyloSolo
I hear ya, we were in college and both poor AF... went to Friday’s, each had 2 drinks.
SomeDetroitGuy
That's a good point. I hate the people who go out, have three drinks, appetizers, the most expensive entree, and dessert then want to split
SomeDetroitGuy
the check evenly when all I got was a salad and a diet coke.
MaxieMooo
This. Went out with a bunch of "friends" once, I had a drink and meal that only totalled like £8 while some people had food over £15, and
MaxieMooo
everyone got mad at me for not wanting to "split the bill between us all" even though my food cost half or less than theirs..
SoniChan
One of the things I love about Japan is "betsu betsu." You pay only for what you ordered. It's super common and you can do it everywhere!
powershit
I call that common sense here in the States
SomeDetroitGuy
In the US, the vast majority of places will split your check which makes this whole "split it evenly" thing even more annoying.
SmolTenk
In germany too. The waiter will usually ask if you are a group.
TakeItEasyPolicy
My wife controls our finances so now she pays for all our dates
Shitheid
We do the same. I make more money than him so it all technically comes from my account but it works for us (His money pays the actual bills)
WinterGrasp
If someone is generous to pay for everything it should be accepted but not made into a habit.
Iforgotthetopic
There should be no standard and people should be able to make that choice.
spacecowboyein
My gf drives 2 1/2 hours to see me on the weekends and has to pay toll fees, so I pay for everything when she's up here. I also make way mor
mastikator
Heyyyy, no standards. Now you're speaking my language
RageMonk
I think its more the idea that some people have that it's expected. I would always offer to pay the first date, but I always felt it was..
RageMonk
More because I was supposed to than because I wanted to.
Emracruel
This. I personally don't feel right if the girl I am with pays for anything on the first few dates. It is nice when they don't just 1/2
Emracruel
Assume that I am going to pay though.
OhhHaiMark
I say you switch it up, sometimes he pays sometimes she pays. If you really enjoy the persons company who cares who is paying for the meal
DruncleCal2000
You are able to make that decision. But as a man. There is insane pressure to pay on the first date.
WWisLife
The person who did the inviting should pay.
PenisShapedPoops
My sister's standard is to pay for every other date with her guy. I think that's a nice one I'd also take.
ISeeYouvePlayedKnifeySpooneyBefore
To each their own i say, a nasty comment like OP mentioned is way out of line
igivetheinternets
Isn't it time for reparations for 100 years of male date subjugation!
idrinkiknowthings
Whoever invites whom! If you picked the restaurant, you pay. You can’t know that person’s budget.
WWisLife
Exactly
elganif
This is the way I like to do it, and just take turns who plans the date
UpvoteFairy3001
I agree. It's when the guy doesn't have a choice that upsets me. But others shouldn't judge if a girl pays for the date.
kirbyvictorious
Exactly, shut up and let a bitch live
DinaRaven
Guys always have the choice. Nobody forces them to pay. They might feel pressured, but it's their choice to give into that pressure.
AstronautChicken
And it's starting to get where others judge you for always letting him pay as well. That's also his choice.
Chivocat
Good choice of words in you meme. Overprivilged women taking advantage of well meaning men. You know how to get your points on imgur.
c0smicj0ker
Everyone has a choice. Just don't do it. And if someone expects what you don't want to offer don't date them
snarkybat
When I step up to pay, they ask to split. When bf does, nothing. We enjoy having me pay with the card to our joint account.
Junktrunkjunkie
I've always thought that who ever asks/planned the date should usually pay. after all if you plan something expensive as a surprise and →
WWisLife
Yup.
Junktrunkjunkie
→ they aren't prepared to pay for that much it's kind of a dick move.
AMacGyver
My wife and I usually went Dutch when we were dating. Now it all comes from the same place anyway, so it doesn't matter who pays.
ckels
My husband and I always joke about “he’s paying” or “she’s paying tonight” but it’s the same credit card/acct, only diff is the wallet used
textilelover
All of our money goes into the same account as well. I'm more fiscally responsible so I pay the bills, but it's joint money.
iluvgrumpycat
Same! I'm called "Master of Coin." Hubs is kinda clueless about finances so I handle everything. He has access, but rarely uses it.
QuazMasta
I pay the bills cuz i'm obsessed with making sure we didn't get charged wrong. In 3 years, I think I've found one false $10 charge and >>
QuazMasta
one time her sister rented an Amazon movie on our CC (shared Amazon acct). Maybe I should be less obsessed...
ThePeoplesOpinion
Some people don't do dates. Some people eat their double wrapped pucks of McShame in their cars and cry silently.
ManMashine
ablecreature
*McCar*. *McCry*
DankM3M3GetUpVotes
*Mc Kerchow!*
ImReallyVent
I’m married and I do this. Am I doing something wrong?
BillogUncle
That's what me and my girlfriend done before we got together. Was perfect
newdoug2017
foxmsfDD
Like a gentleman
WoefulWombat
I eat in my car because driving home would make the food cold but I also don't want to be around people.
ilovefluids
I used to order 2 burger combos for takeout...one for the ride back home and the other to eat at home
McGreed
damn, that reminds me that it's valetines day soon. Let's go for the 8th year of shame ;)
Inappropesmagotes
Like a real american
Inappropesmagotes
Disclaimer. I am american and this is a joke.
coffeecats19
"double wrapped pucks of McShame" shit hahahah
Sickofnotliving
This hits close to home.
EvilDeadTed
ThePeoplesOpinion
I needed to see this.
dremth
My girlfriend and I eat fast food in our car together all the time. It's your own private restaurant with your choice of music.
kirbyvictorious
Don't cry in your car while eating fast food. That is a slippery slope my friend. You won't be lonely forever! You have me as a friend at
kirbyvictorious
Least. Not great, but here if you want it, like the drunk train wreck chick at the party
marylanddd
yeah but does the guy pay for the double wrapped pucks?? or do they split it?
ThePeoplesOpinion
He is alone. A true man can wallow in his own painuggets alone
theportraitssecretinattackmode
+1 for McShame
RememberTheC4nt
Because the McShame tastes good and no one wants a bite. Or?
ThePeoplesOpinion
The McShame is just a euphemism for every fast food puck hucked or chucked your way.
classybroad
Could you stop watching me eat? It's rude.
SidewalkCrack
The best comment I've read in a long time. Hilarious!
Emilenemane
Thanks for not lyin like a prick :)
Gafflesmaxx
cattywumpus
I do that occasionally. I have a husband, but dates are expensive. We stay in and eat rice with rice.
UpvoteFairy3001
I was the same 2 years ago. I feel your pain. I used to go to the park and eat my Sonic Cheeseburger
psyduckdontgiveafuck
Man I wish our Sonic wasn't a cesspool.
Nuckfugget
I am you 2 years ago, cheeseburger and all.
admiralcrackbar
On the up side I'm about to go sleep in my large bed all by myself and not have to worry about sharing anything.
UpvoteFairy3001
It really is the best. I had a twin until this relationship. But it's LDR so I still get it to myself for most the year
GentlemanWendigo
Shit, I was too ashamed to eat my feelings in public. I cried into my cheeseburgers alone in my room like a pitiful slob.
UpvoteFairy3001
I was ashamed of my family seeing me eating fast food. I eat while driving like instinct.
Itsmechrissy
That actually sounds nice
Ecastillo
I don’t know about you, but that sounds kinda peaceful to me. It’s like a personal picnic!
aeolk
Hell yes. I live with my gf, she has two kids but I also enjoy moments where I can order food just for myself and chill
tehPhreakmang
Damnit now I want sonic
ChangingMyNameToHideFromStalker
... Sonic? I'm assuming this is a fast food chain and not a blue hedgehog!
UpvoteFairy3001
Yes fast food. I'm assuming you're not from America and if so you're west coast
1KingPhantomLurker
Wedt coast has Sonics! Route 44 slushie plx!
1KingPhantomLurker
West... fat fingers ftw
brownbricks
Cali here. We have Sonic, we just have to go out of the way to get it. It seems to do violent things to my body anyway, so.
brownbricks
And to be perfectly clear, I'm not some asshole Californian bragging about how well I eat. 99% of what I put into my body is pure shit.
ChangingMyNameToHideFromStalker
You're correct. New Zealand. :)
WhyAmIHereIShouldBeWorking
I was having a nice day being single till I read these, now I'm just sad.
RememberTheC4nt
When I have seen the posty mood goes like :" hello darkness my old friend..."
UpvoteFairy3001
It's okay, there's someone out there for you :)
LittleKnownOne
Bull... crap. There is not someone for everyone. That is a lie and shouldn't be used to give false hope. Step 1 matters more.
Mechlai
I'm all dressed to go out for a 10km walk for exercise to get a bit more fit for this reason.
MrRandomUK
Who was Lrrrrr? Only he gets to demand pop culture platitudes!
Thisismyusernamenotyoursitsmine
Be out there for yourself!
SirBaconDog
Or no one, either way you are fine
kirbyvictorious
Humans are designed to pair bond, I've only heard of like two people who can't find a long term mate before retirement. Itll happen
UpvoteFairy3001
An if there's no one, there's always tequila!
TooFewGuitars
I'll admit I prefer to pay but looking back at my last relationship, it would've been nice if she paid for something. Or cooked. Or cleaned
meskarune
Me and my bf are like this. I cook and clean his place and do whatever chores when I visit and he takes me out to dinner 1-2 times a month.
TooFewGuitars
Or washed a dish... Now that I think about it she didn't help out with much of anything
Fireguy97
There is a word for people like that. - Ex.
SexualConsent
Hindsight is 20/20
marshawnlynchatapressinterviewsaying
Dude, did you date my ex wife?
TooFewGuitars
Nah this one had never been married... But sorry for your luck
FrozenFoodGuy
Was about to ask the same thing! And the one time she did pay for something, she nearly expected worshipping...
powershit
Sounds familiar. Well until she cheated, then I knew she was capable of putting effort into something lol
TooFewGuitars
Yeah mine cheated too... Maybe we've stumbled on a pattern?
powershit
Sure did. Bitches ain't shit but hos and tricks
Zodgrod
My now wife when we were dating paid for the whole date every other date. This impressed me to no end
KRUPTA80
Id prob order the fattest lobster in town wenever it was her turn to pay.
PissedMahPants
That’s why you’re single and lonely
KRUPTA80
Thats why your sad n hate your life...no sence of humor mate.
CelestialMeatBicycle
My girlfriend and I do the same! We’re both aware of each other’s financial state, so we each pay when we’re in a better spot.
FallenPredators22
I wouldn't let my now wife pay. At least not for the first few months. She even tried to beat me to the theater to pay. Didn't work lol
spaceasaurus
That’s what me and the spouse do. Also, if its my turn to pay, it’s your turn to pick where we eat. Thems the rules.
EarthAnimalArmy
this is why they now married, he knew there was no one better :)
Zodgrod
Yes indeed
SectionF4
That's how we do it. Although, it seems like I'm always buying sushi, while she gets the check for pizza. Oh well ( :
YerAGrizzardArry
My wife and I took turns buying rounds at a bar when we had our first date. Got things off to a great start.
Zodgrod
Yeah it makes things an equal playing field, no need to feel obligated
Ojkillsdrinkapplejuiceinstead
An equal....paying field?
TigerlilyOz
That sounds fair to me.
insilico
Sometimes when I pay they give my bf back my card/the receipt anyway. My name is not androgynous..
Donkey1521
My now wife was similar. We lived in different cities and every time I went to visit her, she would take me out to a nice dinner. Once we 1/
Donkey1521
Got married, I paid off her student loans (~$50k). She repaid me by blessing us with two awesome kids. Good relationships are two-sided. 2/2
sleep112
As I’m drowning in student loan debt I find this to be the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard
fairycheese
We've been asked "so who's turn is it?" Probably as we were out on valentines day in jeans and hoodies together.
StoptheInfamousElGuapo
the thing is that women as a group have been conditioned to feel that men OWE them. I REALLY like seeing women who stand up and say "this
StoptheInfamousElGuapo
isn't right!" To claim that they want equal treatment but want men to take care of them and do the hard and dirty jobs and keep society
StoptheInfamousElGuapo
running. Karen Straughan is a female MRA youtuber who breaks down this phenomenon in several videos.
FaptainPicard
I had an ex who accepted when I paid, but when she did she apparently wrote it down. When we broke up she tried to give me a bill.
LeSethX
All my exes and I alternated on paying for dates, groceries, and mutual items
waking86
This is exactly how my wife and I dated also. I took her to McDonald's. And she took me to fancy restaurants.. kidding. McDonald's is gross
caoranach
For bf and me it kinda goes untold that the one who got the highest income that month (it varies) spends a little more on "we" - stuff
CeatharLaoghgPT
This happns me with my gf, she will pay atleast every other time, sometimes more often! Then I go spoil her a little. Equality matters!
ldanton
That's how my BF and I do it - I pay for every other date and so does he
MidlandRedux
I met my wife back in the 90s. It never occurred to us that I would buy everything for her while we were dating. That's prostitution.
stinkingyeti
My ex wife has many flaws, but paying for going out wasn't one of them. Basically the one who had the idea paid for it.
BendOverAndIllShowYa
I went on three dates with a girl. She never even offered to get the check, not even a gesture and didn’t say thank you Now she’s married...
DaveByTheBell
my now-wife was the first woman I dated to ever offer to pay. Needless to say I wanted to hang on to that
Crandillo
My fiance and I do this. We like taking care of each other and eating out is fun as fuck.
UpvoteFairy3001
That's how it should be. Either split the check or alternate. And if I want to go out but my bf doesn't, I'll pay when I win the argument.
Zodgrod
yeah we're not in the 195-s any longer time to be equal
Sockengockel
I recommend alternating! There are psychological effects making you appreciate a free dinner every other time more than always paying half
ArtOzz
..."when I win the arguement"...WHEN. Lol.
NameNotFoundException
I mean, there's not really anything to pay unless she wins the argument. I get what you're both saying, but still.
c0smicj0ker
Yeah I always just alternate with my bf. Then we feel like the other is "treating" us to a date. It's nice. Splitting is great when you
c0smicj0ker
First start dating tho and your not sure how many future dates there will be.
Rkhbusa
Or how about whoever gets treated just always appreciates it and doesn’t expect it like a spoiled slob
NorfolkInWayMan
You mean always then ;-)
UpvoteFairy3001
Nah, sometimes he does want to go out
ABluntForce
My wife and I never kept track, and still don't. If one of us is broke, the other gets it. And whoever wants to pay for it otherwise, does.
ABluntForce
We like to treat each other when we go out. Even though we have a joint bank account, we still have our own money.
ABluntForce
My parents were the same. They made a point out of supporting each other when they needed to, and their relationship was always good.
ABluntForce
The only argument is about if one of us fucks up and overspends to the point of overdrafts. And it's not a big deal, just inconvenient.
WhiteningMcClean
As a guy, it doesn't even have to be 50/50. Splits can be based on financial availability. If your SO is poorer than you, pay every so often
kirbyvictorious
My husband and I were broke when we met in college, but I had an allowance and he had meal plan money, so when I wanted food he'd refused to
kirbyvictorious
Go with me at first. Would refuse to do anything but talk, wouldn't ask me out because girlfriends are too expensive. He used to be so weird
kirbyvictorious
The TLDR is we did free/cheap stuff instead because I honestly do not care because I am not a hooker
DamnThatSoob
When girls at bars expect a free drink and I'm like "aite PEACE" because they are basically hookers to me ^^^
kirbyvictorious
That's how I am when a guy offers me a drink...I'm like what do you want and he's like nothing and I'm like >.>
YOURSTUPIDITYISRAPINGME
CreateYourOwnNormality
Person who asks for the date should be prepared to pay, but the askee can offer to go dutch. Once you're dating steady you share the costs.
garbagedonut
Maybe that was true a bunch of years ago dude, but if you've both got jobs just split the fucking thing. 1/2
garbagedonut
If she's got no job and lives at her parents house then I guess the dude can pay, but who'd want that whole situation?
CreateYourOwnNormality
Everybody? You choose your partners after a financial background check and a deposit, or by 'I fancy them/enjoy their company'?
mandadadada
I feel like this post is absolute attention-whoring to please bitter dudes who go out with women who don't wanna pay for anything, this is>>
mandadadada
Such a common thing, people splitting bills that you can't even call it a "unpopular opinion". There are both men and women who will use >>
mandadadada
Others for money, sex or whatever they wanna use you for, that's just bad character, doesn't have to do with gender, shit come in all shapes
CreateYourOwnNormality
The word 'boyfriend' is key, it implies relationship. If you're too much of a child to have a conversation with your partner and resolve
CreateYourOwnNormality
who pays/both pays/go on cheap dates coz one person earns less/richer person pays for expensive stuff, then you're not being a partner.
iamthebeeker
I offer to pay more times than I actually want to pay. My husband hardly takes me up on it. I think he is just glad I offer.
BunBunIsMyName
Why don't you share finances, you're married. I'm always confused by this notion lol
ioverthinkthings
My ex and I did this. Neither of us ever had to ask permission to buy things the other might find unnecessary/stupid. It worked for us.
Sublime1981
This. I had an ex, despite not keeping a joint account, would always interrogate me about purchases I made. 1/?
Sublime1981
I made way more money, I paid our rent and bills, the most she contributed was some grocery shopping. I never questioned 2/?
Sublime1981
why she was always buying new clothes, new shoes etc. but I buy a damn video game and I am getting a lecture on finances. 3/?
willi828
Money is the #1 reason for fights. Some independence can do wonders for a married couple.
iamthebeeker
Newly married as grown adults. This works for us. We have different ways of managing money. No arguments.
SaikyoStyle
Water is wet.
UpvoteFairy3001
Water makes other things wet however, water in and of itself is not wet.
JohnnyWindchimes
As a man, you pay for the first date if you asked her out. It's the courteous thing to do. After that, it's fair game to split whatever
SheriffHD
shared finances and joint account. she lets me use the card to feel more manly sometimes lol
Marty40k
It's nice to trust someone like this, but are there some safety features for that joint account? Or can she just empty it at will?
UmmonPrime
same here.. I joke with her all the time that it's "her turn" to pay for dinner when we go out. No his and hers money. Its our money.
ManMashine
That's really sweet. Also shows a high amount of trust. Respect.
Nobodyslogan
My wife and I have a joint account.... so it makes no fucking difference who 'pays'.
LupusIgnis
My now wife and I created an account for shared expenses after dating for half a year. Freedom and responsibility.
twominutesforhighsticking
Yeah when it's super expensive I tell my husband that he has to pay for it all. It comes out of joint I just like saying it.
AnimeBarbie
Eeek. Irritating. I'm sorry :( We have a rule in my house; if it's my idea, I pay. If it's his idea, he pays. If we plan to do something -
willi828
This is the societal norm, not just for romantic dinners.
AnimeBarbie
- together in advance, we split. Seems fair to us ;)
AnimeBarbie
*Excluding birthdays or things like that. His birthday, I pay. My birthday, he pays, etc. Its about being fair and not holding your partner-
AnimeBarbie
to ANY expectations- including financial!
AmyRene
Every time ive tried the man acts insulted and tells me to put my money away...smh.
fandsor
No kidding. I've had to fight to pay my own bill. That's where the relationship ends. I shouldn't have to fight to pay my own way.
UpvoteFairy3001
I think for the first date or two that's fine, but after being together for a few months it should be equal.
Sublime1981
I've never acted insulted, but I can be very persistent about wanting to pay for a first date at least. You are generally talking about 1/?
Sublime1981
dudes that have been conditioned from birth that this is the way it should be. It's like indoctrination, you can't just shake it off....
Modversity
During the summer my husband didn't work, so I'd e-transfer him most of my pay because he handled the finances, but still kept some money 1/
Modversity
In my account in case I wanted or needed anything, this included picking him up beer on my way home or going out for supper. Just because 2/
Modversity
He was a stay at home dad, doesn't mean he didn't deserve to be treated nice too. Not all women see it this way, but more should. Thank you.
willi828
Youre a wonderful wife.
193chjk
I believe whichever side makes more money should pay more. Relatively speaking.
Sublime1981
Admittedly, I make alot more than my gf and I like to have a good time eating out and run up a bill. I understand 1/?
Sublime1981
she can't really afford to be dropping nearly $200 bucks on a meal for no particular occasion even though she offers to pay or split 2/?
Sublime1981
every time, I will usually let her grab the bill if were just grabbing a cheap meal somewhere.
Sublime1981
I also like to tip a significant amount. Makes me feel good brightening up someones day.
PsyduckIsMyFavoritePokemon
That’s how me & my bf handle things. We try to take turns but I usually cover 2 for his 1. I’d rather cover more than not be able to go out.
lagavulin16
Ooo, we could implement income based dating law that mirrors tax law!
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
I think when you first start dating you should split, but once it becomes serious if there's a big income gap then the one who makes more /1
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
should pay more. Mostly because I don't think you should have to subsidize the going-out of strangers just because you make more. But /2
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
once you're a team it only makes sense to do what works best for both of you. Which is, either limit the cost of dates so the lower /3
InkyBlinkyPinkyAndClyde
earner can always afford their half, or have the higher earner pay more. /4
OneBeardOneNation
Agree with this. Once dated a girl who had a bunch of student loans. I'm lucky I got scholarships, so i'd pay more than her. It makes sense
PolishPancakeWithCanadianMapleSyrup
That's how me and my bf do it. He makes twice as much money as me so he offers to pay twice as much.
whatsisname
That's what my wife and I did while dating, after we were together long enough to disclose our incomes.
Znailmonkey
I've gotten so much shit whenever my girlfriend payed for dinners, she's often told them to fuck off.
W0lfMan26
Where do you live? And Who is saying those things?
UpvoteFairy3001
It's fucking awful! If she wants to pay she can pay. Also people should mind their damn business.
RickySpanishhhhh
Server to me: "Really? You're making her pay?" Gf (also a server) to server: "How about you mind your own fucking bisiness? It's my turn!"
rghtwo
Pretty sure "mind your own fucking business" WAS the tip ;-)
W0lfMan26
51CorgisInABar
Hope she didn’t tip for that
TheHellbilly
Only entitled cunts expect to have everything handed to them.
AKittenPrincess
I’m a woman ,My SO(male) stays home /takes care of the house chores and such and I bring home the $$ and if we go out I pay.
UpvoteFairy3001
Have you met people? It's safer to assume everyone is an entitled cunt than so assume they're not
mandadadada
Some people are better judges of character than others @op you should try ;)
TheHellbilly
Yep. People suck, individuals are sometimes ok.
Calclance
I have never felt it was expected, I think it is merely a part of the dying act of courtship.
HoboTerry
Bitch, court a man.
Calclance
As a man I prefer to court women, primary my wife.
bootninja
it made sense for the man to pay for everything back when women were chattel and didn't have any means of supporting themselves.
bootninja
as women have become independant and joined the workforce it doesn't really make sense anymore, so the practice is dying.
Calclance
I personally like it, but I like doing things for people especially the ones I love. Now that I'm married its our money anyway but I still 1
Calclance
enjoy it. I also often pick up the tab for friends as well.
Ilikeitwhenyoucallmebigpapa
One of my female friends thinks like this. She assumes her 'man' should pay for her hair, nails, meals etc. Told her I would Never date her.
Misora
Was out with my bf and a female friend of his commented on how she needed a good man so she could eat out or get nails whenever she wanted.1
Misora
Told her I have 3 degrees and 2 professional licenses. I do those things whenever I want with or without him.(I also make 1.5x what he does)
ManMashine
What was her response?
IndianJoe
I would pay but choose what for. Nails ? Ok, this lengh and color. You don't like it this way ? Well it's my money, so that or nothing.
Twiggeh
Thats cool 'n all, ill pay for what you want. You pay later, in bed. That´s sexist? Too bad, pay your own shit then.
TheLesserOfTwoWeevils
That's a) a dick move and b) hopefully a condition you are springing before hand. No-one owes you sex if you bought them stuff.
Twiggeh
No, whats a dick move is whining about getting equal pay as men and then demand men to pay for everything. Everything in life is a trade.
TheLesserOfTwoWeevils
Demanding your partner pay for everything is also a dick move. The two are not mutually exclusive.
Twiggeh
Yeah, thats what im saying dude. Pay your own shit, or expect to pay some other way. Noone rides for free.
seijirou
If you just want a prostitute the ones that admit to what they are will be less expensive and more talented. More bang for the buck!!
Twiggeh
Nah, i just want some equality, you know :D
UpvoteFairy3001
One of my friends is the same way. She doesn't have a job and he makes $12 an hour. She has always had everything handed to her. Shame.
Ilikeitwhenyoucallmebigpapa
That's the thing this woman makes like 70k a year. Shame because we have great chemistry otherwise.
UpvoteFairy3001
Wait she makes $70k a year and wants her boyfriend's to pay for her shit??? What in the hell.
[deleted]
[deleted]
RichHammond
Ilikeitwhenyoucallmebigpapa
Yea because "A man is supposed to take care of his woman". Stupid antiquated bullshit if you ask me.
robindawilliams
Sounds like the kind of girl that preferred the old ways, wanted low career expectations and minimal voting rights but to be taken care of
WhatDoYouMeanIcantStickmyFingersthere3
To be fair, some men like paying for such events. Not that we know you can't, but because we were raised that it represents a gentlemen act.
TyrantJester
The fact is that "gentlemen act" is why it has come to be expected, and those days are honestly long due for being over.
willi828
See but i dont think it has to be restricted to the man. Paying for someone is showing you can take care of them and that you would like to.
flapperfemmefatale
you can take care of someone without spending money, though.
HoboTerry
No. They just want the pussy
WhatDoYouMeanIcantStickmyFingersthere3
I mean, that'd be nice. But I've paid before when I've gone out with gal friends, where no intimacy was present.
ManMashine
I don't like that and hate that it's "expected" from a guy. It's like paying for a hooker.
mandadadada
It's not expected of a guy, unless you're hooking up with the wrong kind of people, namely selfish, cheap people who want to use you>
mandadadada
If you hook up with these people all the time, you're a bad judge of character and you won't be the first man who gets overly enticed by >
mandadadada
Looks and forgets personality counts too. Ofc I'm not saying all ugly people are nice, far from it. But you choose who you go out with
WhatDoYouMeanIcantStickmyFingersthere3
I'm not saying its expected, but some guys really dont mind paying. And also wont get upset if she pays once in a while.
UpvoteFairy3001
I do realize my post doesn't apply to everyone. But it's all I see in my generation. Girls wanting everything but not willing to pay $10
WhatDoYouMeanIcantStickmyFingersthere3
Oh no, I fully agree with your post. From my generation, that's just sometimes hard to allow a women to pay. Hell I'm like that with 1/2
mandadadada
Dude honestly splitting bills are so common, I think your post is crap. That's NOT an unpopular opinion. Decent people will split a bill NP
WhatDoYouMeanIcantStickmyFingersthere3
2/2 my wife now and she uses our joint account! The look of her paying with our money versus me paying!! lol
TORGUEFROMPANDORA
upvoted your other comment to put them in order
WhatDoYouMeanIcantStickmyFingersthere3
Not sure why it always puts 2/2 on top of the 1/2. That always bugs the crap outa me.
UpvoteFairy3001
Because the 2/2 is the most recent comment.
UpvoteFairy3001
My dad is the same way. When my parents go out he has to pay and he has to drive. Its so weird to me
WhatDoYouMeanIcantStickmyFingersthere3
lol I always drive as well, unless my wife allows me to have a drink.
Donth101
I insist on driving whenever possible with my partner, but that's because her driving frightens me.
UpvoteFairy3001
I always insist on driving when my bf visits because it's my car and he's from the UK. American roads are big and he's not used to them
tyjet3
True, but the problem is the women expecting it. Hard for it to be an out of the ordinary gentlemen act when its expected of you.
Sublime1981
This. It's super confusing now, and having re-entered the dating game recently, I was really worried about what to do in the date 1/?
Sublime1981
situation. Would she be offended if I paid? Would she be offended if I wanted to split it? Women seem to differ in that regard 2/?
Sublime1981
and even suggesting something against their stance on the matter seems like playing Russian roulette. Fortunately I found a sane woman 3/?
Sublime1981
That offered to split our first date, not leaving the decision up to me, because I was honestly freaking out about it 4/?
lyricallove
Not disagreeing, but what if a woman was raised to let the gentleman pay?
tyjet3
That's kind of my point. The man may think "oh I am such a gentleman for paying" while this is just the norm for her. The weight 1/2
tyjet3
of his act is lost on her and has no impact, doesnt sound like a great start to a relationship when he feels he has done something special.
BroadFjord
I think it's time to stop teaching kids "a gentleman pays" and start teaching "a good person brings something to the relationship." Lot less
BroadFjord
room for misinterpretation creating really shitty people.
WhatDoYouMeanIcantStickmyFingersthere3
Yes and no. Teaching young boys to be a gentlemen is hardly creating shitty people. You're thinking about entitlement.
BroadFjord
I don't see a huge disconnect between the "gentleman" idea of "If you're a good man, you should take care of your girl and pay for
WhatDoYouMeanIcantStickmyFingersthere3
I do. The latter that you describe makes it feel like a chore. If you dont do it, you're a terrible person.
BroadFjord
everything" and the entitlement of "If he's not paying for everything for me, he's not a good man, it has nothing to do with me."
AnimeBarbie
I used to date a guy that was STRONGLY like this. One time he threw a fit because I bought myself a coke from a gas station while he was-
AnimeBarbie
-browsing around. Like a full blown fit. Because I paid for myself. Didn't talk to him much after that.
ManMashine
No offense but… that sounds like the dude was the most beta-male ever.
AnimeBarbie
There are also a ton of women (like myself) that were raised to do the same thing. I like to pay for things. It makes me feel good. If your-
AnimeBarbie
partner isn't allowing you to pay for events/dates/etc or even chip in, it can be viewed as an ego blow. If she insists, just let her pay!-
AnimeBarbie
At least for her half anyways! haha!