“Please send this to someone you think needs to hear this” is a bold suggestion. That would be an interesting conversation… “I dunno, i just figured this might be something relevant to a freakazoid like you. No judgement though!” 🤣
To many people are going to see the first part and thing they can leave the eggplant they stuck up their butt. PLEASE GET HELP if you have an eggplant stuck up your butt. We want to laugh at you.
Okay but if we're asking people to be honest here, I'm pretty sure your average medical professional is definitely going to judge. Like, they're still going to help you but ain't no way they aren't laughing at you in their heads (or maybe even in the break room)
That isn't going to matter if you leave it there long enough for it to soften, as she's talking about. You'll pull on the flared base, and it'll just break off.
Damn how long are your sessions that your vegetables can go off before you can get off? Or are you just using already mushy vegetables? Because while it might seem prudent to get some use out of older produce, I recommend you stick with fresh.
You didn't watch the video in the post at all, did you? I didn't say my sessions; I said what she's discussing in the video. She's talking about them softening and getting mushy from being left in. I said a flared base wouldn't matter once that happens. Don't try to make this personal (I wouldn't use a vegetable; only safe toys), and maybe next time pay attention to what's actually be discussed before commenting (or at least read/watch what's been posted before diving into the comments)
I imagine they will be very professional/polite when dealing with the situation. And once the person is healthy again/on their way home. THEN the laughter and judgement.
I'm a paramedic in Indiana. Dildos are indeed more expensive than the 50 cent cucumber you can buy from the store. Plus not everyone has access to where you could buy one safely, or even at all. It sucks, hell it's hard enough to get people to buy condoms since they're put behind those plastic guards. Either you have to call someone to unlock it, or it shouts that someone opened the condom door.
Unfortunately thems the breaks in these type of communities.
You're underestimating how many cases people like her deal with. I'm sure most of them barely register beyond "I should tell them the things I usually tell them after this routine procedure."
I get the gif is a joke, but, for the curious: if those on the receiving end of anal sex takes the proper steps to prepare (daily fiber supplements, some Imodium a few hours ahead of play, and douching to cleanse the bowels beforehand), the chance of a mess is greatly reduced. People with ibs or similar gi issues may need longer prep time than your average person, but, with patience and the appropriate lube, butt sex can be fun for nearly all consenting adults 😊🍑
Tell the truth, they want to know how much trauma there could be. If you lubed up and had fun that's different than if you rammed it in and lost it when you flinched in pain.
Missing an "S" though 😏 "Sous Vide" which is French, and word by word would mean "under empty" and i'm too lazy to ask Google translate to get the proper translation... 😬😄
What they meant was "we don't judge to your face." We don't want people getting embarrassed and not coming in in the future, because, lets face it, this won't be the only time a light bulb gets stuck up there. We WILL, however, talk about it for hours in the break room.
Oh, they'll judge, but it's more on the scale of how interesting it was. Soda bottles or hair brush handles: 1/10. Pickled mackerel would likely be up around 5 or 6. They'll share it with other on-duty, but it's not making it to the next shift.
ChewyTheWookie
MrFancyPanzer
It was an accident!
SquirrelWithATophat
EatYourSoylentGreenAndShutUp
I would judge... https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1NGJjYXltdWJ5dnMyYWowOTlyNXhoamlocHh2NnE1NnN4N24xeWF0cCZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/RBeddeaQ5Xo0E/200w.webp
Tenugui
https://media4.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1aThnNmF2ZnpwamY2bmtocDRpa29raXg0eDR5ZmJvcGYzdXdnOXJ3aiZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/Akzci0gtFZjji/200w.webp
Harm
Thanks @op for sending this to people who need to see this!
narcoleptiKnickers
ActingKing42
this directly under the girl with the cactus is rather.....interesting
puxorb
Ah yes, accidentally.
ThisIsNotTheBestUsername
Can, could, would, did.
rbudrick
Just buy sex toys. Don't be stupid.
GroovyCrowley
There is a party in my ass and I'm not even invited!? https://media4.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1bWNvY2kzOTVqMzdjdGlnaWoyOG5uNDFtdTN5azMxaHN2ZjJ4amJsbiZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/10167zoCnaL5le/200w.webp
Kilwrath
“Please send this to someone you think needs to hear this” is a bold suggestion. That would be an interesting conversation… “I dunno, i just figured this might be something relevant to a freakazoid like you. No judgement though!” 🤣
mytruepersonality
To many people are going to see the first part and thing they can leave the eggplant they stuck up their butt. PLEASE GET HELP if you have an eggplant stuck up your butt. We want to laugh at you.
maddeninglemon
Okay but if we're asking people to be honest here, I'm pretty sure your average medical professional is definitely going to judge. Like, they're still going to help you but ain't no way they aren't laughing at you in their heads (or maybe even in the break room)
Nightcaste
Yeah that's a dildon't
seedye
Also, lubriCANT
DOcelot1
Whatdoyousaytoanicecupoftea
So...what im hearing is that its a cheap way to make vodka!
https://media0.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1YWxmaHY2Y2s3dnFteWdyZWRqMHNxcWp6MTZvNnp0dm92Y2h4ZDFqdCZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/105OwsN7a4UQ2Q/200w.webp
ausernamewhat
Boil em, mash
ihavethelowground
https://media3.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1dXQzd2FuMGh4ZGtoZWw0cXcyMXJvZWN5NW0ybnpzOXljbTFtb3JrMiZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/13pqs1VizKyWzK/200w.webp
BranDohCalrissian
Rectum
chrishallett83
GAT-DAYUMED FLARED BASES, PEOPLE!
firlefranz
Helen Mirren has aged really well, huh?
theshinobi23
That isn't going to matter if you leave it there long enough for it to soften, as she's talking about. You'll pull on the flared base, and it'll just break off.
maddeninglemon
Damn how long are your sessions that your vegetables can go off before you can get off? Or are you just using already mushy vegetables? Because while it might seem prudent to get some use out of older produce, I recommend you stick with fresh.
theshinobi23
You didn't watch the video in the post at all, did you? I didn't say my sessions; I said what she's discussing in the video. She's talking about them softening and getting mushy from being left in. I said a flared base wouldn't matter once that happens. Don't try to make this personal (I wouldn't use a vegetable; only safe toys), and maybe next time pay attention to what's actually be discussed before commenting (or at least read/watch what's been posted before diving into the comments)
Alexap30
That squash did look OK.
NChomsky
StarscreamAndHutch
firlefranz
justheretocommentonce
Lemme do it for youuuu... kermiiiiit
firlefranz
What's green and smells like pig?
Kermit's middle finger.
FredGarvinMaleProstitute
WellWellWellLookWhoItIs
“We’re not gonna judge”. I don’t believe that for a second. But I do believe they’ll save it for the break room.
65454685132465846865163
"we're not gonna judge" top 1 things said by people who judge. I would judge. Dildos aren't that expensive.
franknstincmplx
I imagine they will be very professional/polite when dealing with the situation. And once the person is healthy again/on their way home. THEN the laughter and judgement.
“Professionals have standards!”
ChuckleVoodooist
I'm a paramedic in Indiana. Dildos are indeed more expensive than the 50 cent cucumber you can buy from the store. Plus not everyone has access to where you could buy one safely, or even at all. It sucks, hell it's hard enough to get people to buy condoms since they're put behind those plastic guards. Either you have to call someone to unlock it, or it shouts that someone opened the condom door.
Unfortunately thems the breaks in these type of communities.
alsoAzrael
You're underestimating how many cases people like her deal with. I'm sure most of them barely register beyond "I should tell them the things I usually tell them after this routine procedure."
DarthVaderDidNothingWrong
But you can't cook them and serve them at the office BBQ
beemarr
Not with that attitude you can't.
ilhares
I absolutely judge, but I won't ostracize unless it's something "too far", ethically speaking.
ArmoredWanderer
I would go with "they've probably seen worse, you're not even going to register as unusual"
BeingABotIsRad
Okay, but, like, what if it's not there accidentally?
ActingKing42
is the depth accidental?
executivedisfunction
Another argument for good ol' medical grade silicone.
BeckyLookAtHerButt
"Silicone parts are made for toys." - Sir Mix-a-Lot
causality
"Because it feels good" is apparently a valid reason to shove things up your ass but not a good reason to put q-tips in your ear.
b00guy
Does the BootyMD do butt stuff?
BatmanAndCradleRobin
If you watched the video, you would see that BootyMD does indeed do butt "stuff".
BatmanAndCradleRobin
like as in stuff stuffed in butts.
StarscreamAndHutch
Crispy4Skin
Haven't seen this one in like forever, have an upvote.
whiskeydingo
I get the gif is a joke, but, for the curious: if those on the receiving end of anal sex takes the proper steps to prepare (daily fiber supplements, some Imodium a few hours ahead of play, and douching to cleanse the bowels beforehand), the chance of a mess is greatly reduced. People with ibs or similar gi issues may need longer prep time than your average person, but, with patience and the appropriate lube, butt sex can be fun for nearly all consenting adults 😊🍑
firlefranz
Krackajak78
https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1Ymdrcmo4dncyc2l6ODAzd25iZDNnZ3N0cGV2NjE2Y3hwMWhzbXoyaiZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/l4FGA2XplwqFDcLwk/200w.webp
TheAnswerWasAlwaysMoreLube
Much less mess than I imagined, but I have had a few extra rounds to the shower during.
Frencheeseater
Username checks out !
JRMcgovern
you don't even have to be honest, just say you slipped and fell. but do treat it as a true emergency because the longer you wait the worse it gets
QueenOfTheFey
I mean, everyone knows what that means so you might as well be honest, but chances are the hc pro you're dealing with has seen weirder
Arenlor
Tell the truth, they want to know how much trauma there could be. If you lubed up and had fun that's different than if you rammed it in and lost it when you flinched in pain.
BeckyLookAtHerButt
sou vide!
Titilve74
Missing an "S" though 😏
"Sous Vide" which is French, and word by word would mean "under empty" and i'm too lazy to ask Google translate to get the proper translation... 😬😄
AawesomeAardvaark
Under a vacuum
Clayman8
'We're not going to judge"
Yeah well im sure you will cause its not every day that someone shows up with 2 pickled mackerels stuffed up in their guts
BearableBear
We re not judging until we do.
mrputter
"Honest, doc, they weren't pickled when I put 'em in there!"
UncleMeaty
It could be if you had the right attitude.
forte10
What they meant was "we don't judge to your face." We don't want people getting embarrassed and not coming in in the future, because, lets face it, this won't be the only time a light bulb gets stuck up there. We WILL, however, talk about it for hours in the break room.
StarscreamAndHutch
Or if its awesome enough, medical journals or social media depending.
forte10
Rarely do "things stuck in colons" make medical journals. That Buzz Lightyear was impressive, though.
Arenlor
Oh, they'll judge, but it's more on the scale of how interesting it was. Soda bottles or hair brush handles: 1/10. Pickled mackerel would likely be up around 5 or 6. They'll share it with other on-duty, but it's not making it to the next shift.
Clayman8
So to get top marks, it has to be either more than 2 mackerels, or a bigger fish. Got it.
Arenlor
Also a good story. Could probably squeak in another point if you explained the second one was because you were worried the first would get lonely.
Clayman8
This would give the subtext that they were alive when inserted. That alone raises the points by 1 to 1.5 i think.