Resistance1000
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If he clutches his chest and drops dead in front of a crowd during a rally on live TV, the internet will be crashed by MAGAt conspiracy theories about who killed him before his bloated orange corpse hits the floor.
ActionJohnnie
In my town every day, people die in alphabetical order, according to the newspaper.
CaptainScarfish
With the prevalence of BlueAnon conspiracy theories on this web site, I'm certain it won't be the exclusive domain of MAGA.
huffnpuff72
America? Its the whole damn world.
Jamnew60
I am hoping for the 2 for 1 special on the headlines: Trump Dies, Putin Dies.
therealalansmithee
#2 I’ve told that joke for decades without the Soviet reference because there is always someone on my list. there used to be newsstands. Also, my punch line is, “When the son of bitch I’m looking for dies he’ll be on the front page
VindictiveBathToaster
If Ronald McDonald ended this man’s life, he should be celebrated as a hero.
Eschscholtzia
There are a few im waiting for..
ElbowDeepInSaintCelestine
If he died, on stage, in front of a crowd, from natural causes, MAGA would still find a way to blame "far left extremists" and "terrorists".
joeyecho101
firlefranz
#2 What about „Happy Hour“?
cabalin
At first I didn’t recognize him without his diaper
gardenias
I'm pretty sure Trump will make it to the end of his term, but that means the next president has the option of sending him to Iran to face execution for what he has done to them.
BDBottom
Kissinger didn't get dropped on Plaza de Armas from 10000 feet. Subsequent administrations failed for fifty years to thank him for his service as the Butcher Of Chile, so trump getting a one-way trip to Teheran ain't in the books.
GenStrike
Dare to dream
ThatGuyFromJustSouthOfTheMiddleOfNowhere
Madalchemist2018
Remember, stick to the story, no matter how he dies couchfucker did it.
Photeus
They are going to make up conspiracies anyway - run with it and blame the person who benefits (and is also an enemy). Works pretty well.
Madalchemist2018
🤜🤛 spread the word.
imnotinthewitnessprotectionprogram
The front page of every paper - He ded
skarreslave350
The biggest cheer he will ever receive will be after he no longer can hear it.
Resistance1000
That's the best part about Mitch McConnell's "recovery." There's a chance he'll find out some of what was said about him when people thought he was dead.
jridley
I mean, we were saying the same shit all along, so...
thechelonianshelmet
I hope it's live on multiple countries, & protestors cameras (so it can't be stopped from being recorded), on his way to another shitty rally, as he does his little lost tottering wander on the red carpet, he clutches his chest, massively sharts himself, so everyone can hear his sloppy farting as it pours down his trousers onto the carpet, then falls straight forward, smashing his evil face into the ground, the weight of his bloated body forcing a last pathetic wheezy squeak out as his last word
Resistance1000
Can you be more specific? ;-)
jridley
Poetry.
trippingthelightfantastic
SavageDrums
We've had a couple of key ones...
ps238principal
MAGA's demands for an autopsy will be at odds with what I think will happen: A mad scramble by his "family" to get his body cremated before any coroner can catalogue just how unhealthy and messed up his body is, especially his brain.
raitchison
Not just that, but if he's cremated without an autopsy then no crazy conspiracy theory about his death can be disproved.
forestfart
I want to know whats up with his brain! There must be some kind of injury or worms in there!
bertchstudio
It's just parental neglect and mean relatives
DukePhelan
They have lied about his health during his life since day one I am not sure how him being dead will change anything.
They will just come out 'Best corpse we have ever seen! He looks like he should have gone another 50 years at least! The LGBTQ+ antifa obviously killed dear leader!'
SprinklesMckitten
"The president was, as the autopsy prooves, unfit to sign this contract and i am legally not obligated to provide payment.
i will ride this suit until 2060 or until i die."
SpartaWolf117
I'm atheist, but i pray every day that when his heart explodes it's on live broadcast and we get 30 different angles
Ardback
A-aaa-aaaa-aaaaaa-men !!!
Ifekinlovesauerkraut
Yep. And at least 10 cameras should record him shitting his last shit.
somethingstupidandclever
Ive been hoping for an angry mob led by his and Epstein's victims or a republican led mutiny helped by the SS. Nothing too well orchestrated. Pitchforks and torches.
imnotinthewitnessprotectionprogram
It will be the most watched thing on tv since the super bow nip slip. He wants ratings this will grant him ratings
lurkyloos
speedonthis
Prayer is just focussing your thoughts and energy on something to manifest a result, religious folks just feel like they need someone on the other end to listen to them.
Korrd
I think prayer is specifically an attempt to communicate with some other entity. At any rate, I used to say to people that as an atheist I can't pray for them, but I'll hope really hard. Same thing, really.
speedonthis
That's pretty much what I'm saying.
Resistance1000
Another good one would be for him to die during one of his naps in the middle of a live-on-TV cabinet meeting. The psychophants will gradually stop talking and wait for him to wake up and then their panic when they realize he's dead will be a joy to behold. Their only protection from spending the rest of their lives in prison will be as dead as Dear Leader. Bricks the size of minivans will be shat in large quantities.
frozenlake247
Notably this would also call out all the “it’s just a bad picture” and “he’s not really sleeping” BS. Like “oh, if that wasn’t a long standing issue then why did no one notice it died in the middle of a meeting?”
imjustagurl87
This and when he finally dies, he shits himself so fierce everyone can’t make
Up their mind to run or check his vitals.
Resistance1000
Every time he dozes off, I keep hoping he'll let loose with a 2-minute fart or that he fills his diaper while he's sleeping. The reaction of everyone near him will be priceless and then Karolyin' and Jabba the Cheung will be in the worst panic of their lives as they desperately try to spin it.
imjustagurl87
Hahahahaha! YES! I want to see people lose their lunches all over the room. Just like that Family Guy episode “Ipecac drinking contest”.