Alyssandre
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Hello, my name is Alyssa(ndre) and I destroyed my face:(
I want to apologize for the annoying personal post, but I am desperately seeking advice or treatment tips for my torn apart face. Not only do I fear for the permanent damage, but I am also bound to my room in shame and embarrassment until I am no longer absolutely repulsive.
This could also serve as somewhat of awareness for one of many consequences of meth and other hard drugs. I was surprised when I learned that the notorious Faces of Meth are actually caused by the addict themselves, picking at their face. In my experience, I've seen many many people disappear into the bathroom for up to hours at a time. That behavior is viewed as almost normal and is often shrugged off, despite the long-lasting scarring that is the result.
Some of the best feelings in the world...
... come from accomplishments, such as receiving these chips or keytags. Living a clean and sober life is an amazing experience that is rewarding in so may ways. I reached 90 days this last round, which was the longest stretch of sobriety I had ever had! (: I'm truly looking forward to getting back up on my feet and passing my high score.
Now, back to this mess:(
These pictures are roughly 16 hours in. I'm puzzled about the somewhat large area across my high cheek that has turned a shade of purple. At first I thought it was a layer of skin fixing to shed, but now it looks special. Could it be bruised or something?
I'm so sorry, a selfie!!:o
Added purely for comparison, this was taken less than a month ago. Sure, I'm wearing some makeup and it's not lit to display my flawed skin, but my face was nowhere near as bad as this here now. :c
<3
I don't know what to expect, but I have faith in the Imgur community and can only hope for the best!
With each hurdle I struggled with in recovery, I found it best to put that energy out into the rooms. The help and support needed would always come thru to help me over.
Puppy Tax!!
Hippy!!! The shih-tzu who brings love and happiness everywhere she goes (:
Puppy tax
Thank you so much for reading and any attention. Please share any knowledge or comments you have towards this type of situation. I am not a regular poster, but am so alarmed and concerned that I needed to break thru and ask my fellow imgurians(:
Have a really good day today, everyone! May you find a pleasant surprise at some point today to help brighten up your day!
EDIT: Update/Follow-Up Post! -> http://imgur.com/a/bfFiw
deathventure
See a dermatologist.They'll be able to assess the situation and offer better advice, as well as some medical treatments that will help.
themadspeedster94
Either way I think you're very pretty.
AlexTwoKraft
If I had to choose between medical advice on Imgur and seeing a doctor I'd totally go for the latter. Good luck with the recovery.
FlashlhsalF
I know this makes sense but over 33 000 people have seen this, there are inevitably many many real doctors that will see this
impeesa
seek help- find a sponsor, see a doctor, then seek help again- addiction is a chronic disease and needs to be treated like one- please.
Alyssandre
TY I have a first meeting with a new sponsor scheduled later this week(:
impeesa
Stay strong please- seek help often we are not meantt to do this l ife thing alone- reach out to me if you ever want to talk-
AlfredGaebeli
I still think you re pretty. Just stay the fuck away from drugs!! Thats all the advice I have.
Butterlumps
I really have no idea, but as a guy who not only got hit with the acne stick, but got tied up and beaten with it, I sorta feel ya.
Waitthisparachuteisarucksack
TOP TIP : don't ask for tips from strangers, see a fucking doctor.
TheAmanda4life
it's best to see a dermatologist but Cocoa Butter always helps me with my acne and self harm scars. they fade within a few months
ChocolatePizzaMemes
Rule 1: Don't look for medical advice on the internet. Go see your doctor, who will probably send you to a dermatologist.
RandomlyComments
True. Everything is cancer or death.
Smays
Go ahead and go to a dermatologist, but the skincareaddiction subreddit is also full of people who super helpful.
joapet
As a Brit I always forget some can't just go to a doctor without having to pay for it. But I feel this is one of those times when you should
IceyStars
Sigh, it's called National Insurance... something you do (or at the very least should) pay for
BubblesSayingDecent
You still have to pay for national insurance. In England only the antibiotics and other prescriptions cost money.
simplyshiny
You don't need internet help, you need a doctor.
bludongle
OK first off the problem. You skin is currently ejecting previous toxins in your system which is what is causing the major contrast. You do
bludongle
Need to seek a dermatologist for antibiotica as you likely also have a minor infection as well you need to ask what vitamins you need to
bludongle
Rejuvinate the proper oils in your skin which sadly can take more them a month to have effect until then you won't know if there is perma
bludongle
Scarring. If there is laser treatment can likely fix it if there isn't kudos. Get supplements eat healthy and stay clean.
DrCocksMD
Dont do meth. Trust me I'm a doctor.
zzloganzz
Become deadpool
FernandoRumdebum
TittyfuckingChrist you must have smoked your kneecaps off. Hope all works out for you, looking past the scars you're cute as shit
ozythemandias
Yep, I learned about this in rehab from a crack addict. Sucks. We deal with the consequences of our choices for the rest of our lives
ozythemandias
And there are always consequences. Glad you're sober, stay strong
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
She was just on meth 16 hours ago. She picked her face apart.
ozythemandias
The scars are gonna suck
L3DRP
She can cosplay deadpool.
Alyssandre
Oh my gosh. Yes. TY! I've referenced him twice now irl when talking about my face and no one ever understands:(
MermaidEden
don't ty him OP, he's being a dick, not helpful xD
Userxy
You have a great attitude, stay clean and healthy! :)
onthe6ball
no need to hide, you're not repulsive. life leaves marks, inside and out
J4CKER
Very true, but i'm still sure she would rather clear it up? she is gorgeous still, but she would be even more stunning with it sorted
TanithRosenbaum
This needs more upvotes.
FavouritePet
Yes it sure does. You have a beautiful smile and lovely eyes. I'm sure there's a lovely girl in there too. Keep trying your best xx
Verax
This comment, so so true.
ImSynnical
this, I used to care so much about what people thought of me and how i look, The self hate is worse than actual judgement. Live and let live
minuteye
Hiding and isolating yourself from the world is likely not going to help your recovery. Most people will assume it's bad acne and ignore it.
jonahandtherabbit
You could try on reddit. R/skincareaddiction has good people.
Alyssandre
Thank you! I will check it out
alexapocalypse
Your body is purging toxins. Drinking a ton of water every day will help. Dermatologist will have prescriptions to help healing.
PersonalityPrototype
Also try oil pulling to help remove toxins. Nothin but swishing coconut oil for 15 minutes then spitting it out.
alexapocalypse
I do that. Works great.
jonahandtherabbit
No problem! They might still recommend a doctor, which I do as well! Important to take care of yourself! Best of luck with everything!
crawler8ed
Don't put tape on your dog.
Alyssandre
okay
syntaxxor
Looks like electric tape
DiscoSockPuppets
OH SHUT UP.
crawler8ed
okay, I said my piece anyway.
Lurkasausrus
Might be weird but try pure tea tree oil. Smells funny but really help the skin heal by keeping out bacteria. A natural choice to try.
Loribob
Not concentrated.. Dilute it 1 to 10 with water or that shit will burn the skin to fuck! Speaking from experience...
pixie327
Not 100% Tea Tree Oil, though, or it will likely give you a chemical burn! Dilute the pure TTO and use as a cleanser.
dirtcreature
Confused. You're still smoking meth? If so, stop. But go and see a dermatologist.
nobodyknowseste
Visit a dermatologist, everyone can have different treatments. Don't just go for over the counter stuff. Best wishes from a med student.
Alyssandre
The Dr at urgent care had to ask for a 2nd opinion& when the other dr left, she advised me to wash with Aveeno. Is Aveeno > Soap+h2o?
nobodyknowseste
Yes it's absolutely better than soap. Still a combination of both is good too.
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
So wait... those aren't just zits? Those are from you obsessively picking at your face while on meth 16 hours ago?
kellax1978
Meth bugs are no joke.
itsimpossibletofindausernamethatisnttaken
Adderall does this too. Some shrink prescribed it to my mom in pretty high dosage for depression. She used to do this for hours after work.
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
Yep, Adderall has at least two different amphetamines in it. Good stuff!
Wombatish
Dermatillomania can be a symptom all by it's lonesome. Sadly I know. My hands are almost tolerable at the moment but that's because I've *c*
Wombatish
*c* been home and able to wash a lot, which can really help disguise.
Alyssandre
Yeah, I couldnt tear myself away for a good couple of hours. When I /finally/ stood up n backed away, only then did I see the full damage
TheOBanger
How much meth did you smoke to get yourself to not notice the damage? Genuinely intrigued.
PitbullsPublicist
get yourself some mittens and lay off your fez
summitshow
With just your fingers or did you use tools?!
sweetbeatdown
I absolutely wouldn't touch it, but it'll probably heal on its own. Since its so fresh. Maybe.
Tvakc
As a pathological groomer, I can tell you your skin will be fine. It doesn't look like you went very deep. Focus on stopping the behavior.
kkbellzz
I'm confused. I thought u were clean for 90 days? I'm wondering what ur face will look like after it heals for a few weeks...
Alyssandre
Yes, relapsed. & I was considering posting an update if ppl were interested. Idk tho cuz it seems too far away for something so unimportant
Baconstips
I would love to see your accomplishment :)
kkbellzz
Ok I understand. I, myself, am in recovery and relapse is part of recovery. Plz don't give up now. A relapse doesn't mean u have to give up
ididntwantitanyway
I'd like an update, if only as something for you to look forward to posting to maybe keep your mind straight a little longer. Good luck!
Joonbug
So it sounds like you relapsed today as well? Please be sure the tell someone that you have relapsed who can help you through this day.
Alyssandre
Yes, I relapsed nearly a couple weeks ago now and I have told ppl. Now that my face is all fd up, I have to come clean to my family today:(
WhatTheFrench
Good luck in your recovery.
Joonbug
Good luck, and let them help you. I understand the shame, but remember to take it one day at a time. This can be day 1 for you.
Skeetskeetnojustkiddingthatsgross
Unfortunately time is what you need :( no quick fix. If you have fresh wounds keep clean until scabbed. I know you'll want to but do NOT (1)
Alyssandre
THANK YOU! very useful advice
Skeetskeetnojustkiddingthatsgross
Of course! You're getting a lot of "see a dermatologist" and I'm sure you've thought of that or you wouldn't have asked here lol. I know its
Skeetskeetnojustkiddingthatsgross
So hard to be patient and try to balance the mental aspects of it AND recovery but time and healing will help both.
Skeetskeetnojustkiddingthatsgross
Pick the scabs. Seriously, scar city. Once there's no risk of infection moisturize moisturize moisturize. Silicone scar gel is magic if 2
Skeetskeetnojustkiddingthatsgross
Used properly and religiously. Once you have "good" scabs you can start with that. Time will heal it. At the end of a few months if you're 3
Skeetskeetnojustkiddingthatsgross
Still see more scarring than you'd like, then consider regular microdermabrasion/facials or laser resurfacing (way more $ for the latter) 4
Skeetskeetnojustkiddingthatsgross
Skin has to be 100% healed b4 you can do either but young skin CAN recover if given the right support (moisturize). You got this!
Crazy49er
Go see a dermatologist
l1ldreamstar
at first I thought you said Demonologist and cackled a bit.
trippinoctopus
But the dermatologist won't give her upvotes
cvJoint
Yeah fuck real life and health
BenHurovic
You will get a prescription for the best stuff. Way better than any home treatment.
nlghtmancometh
The best stuff, really, they're going to make you a winner again. Right now you aren't winning.
chickenfriedriceisdabomb
I lol'd, you snuck that shit up on me and I like that about you. We aren't winning anymore, we need to start winning in trade and at border
kmikl
@OP: Seriously speaking, a dermatologist is going to be your very best option here. A derma. will be able to best assess your skin.
pawesomeopossum
Yes, because that's always doable for someone 90 days clean from Meth. No insurance? Good luck.
VernonLamb
Yeah, start with getting a culture swab for staph. Then let it all heal. Then chemical peels.
aydris
Yeah this advice is best advice. Dermatologists would be able to access your skin and the kind of care it needs.
ruferto
yep, at a glance, you'll be alright but professional help is needed
GunPonTooth
Looks like perfume allergies to me...
oaberbyamd
I thi k she will get aore reassuring advice frim us than from a doctor. She will go to a doctor with an informed idea because this community
oaberbyamd
Is awesome.
oaberbyamd
Sorry is new year and I'm drunk and it shows. Happy new year to all of you!
dandelionbomb
You definitely need to get antibiotics.
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DoorbyTheHouseShelf
Jokes aside, No lol that will make you itch more.
McKill
I wish I could downvote this comment into oblivion. Jerk.
30SecondsToFail
As a mobile user, YOU THINK YOU CAN ESCAPE MY WRATH
Sharknado2012
Seriously, you uppity tools need to learn how to take a joke. Calm down
DickWhiskers
Lol i got banned for a day for saying that. Unreal.
DoorbyTheHouseShelf
For real, probably non-drug users. Clearly OP isn't going to take that as sound advice. Addicts joke about our drug use all the time.
Hirox
Seriously there could be staff infection there. They'll put you on antibiotics. Happened to me. Thought it was zits, but it was staff.
AcousticKaboom
Yeah, that's exactly what I thought it was, until it turns out I developed a nickle allergy from a belt which gave me a staph infection.
Hirox
Also. If they suggest something called Acutain (spelling?) One of the side effects is SUICIDAL TENDENCY. You don't want that
kong210
I think that was one of those side effects that they had to include as 1 person committed suicide one time while using the product.
wwny
Accutane is for acne. Since the skin was damaged in a different way, I don't think a doc would prescribe it initially.
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
No, it IS acne. Bad acne. She just picked at it.
aPurpleLiger
Good information regardless
IHateApostrophes
Even when it is severe acne you don't get accutane until you've tried other things first. And we always warn patients about this side effect
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Hirox
You're right most docs don't go right to it. I was just trying to say avoid it if she can.
baubaugo
Staph
donkeymoney
Stahp! Just, stahp.
Hirox
Thx
megatrep
Thanks
donkeymoney
Thank you very much.
Derfalke
There is a staff of staph.
FlamingGranny
It's staff because they work there duhhh /s
Mycatisaninja
I don't know about Dermatology, google does, but I know addictions, and you're not repulsive for trying to better yourself. *hugs*
Alyssandre
TY I feel repulsive inside n out right now though, since I fell off of recovery. I'm hopeful I'll get back on track, but, until then, ugh1/2
Alyssandre
Everything is a struggle x(
PersonalityPrototype
Challenges give you a chance to show who you are, show yourself who you are, kick that shit, shine from the inside out.
Mycatisaninja
How long were you sober? Just remember that period as a fact you can make it when the dark times and itches come in. There is light.
Alyssandre
I reached 90 days, the longest I've ever had off any&all drugs. I just need to get past the first few days, those are the hardest
Mycatisaninja
I find that the third week is the hardest. The first few you have withdrawals, but by 3 weeks, you're starting to feel better...and can slip
Alyssandre
I'm considering going back to rehab, itd really get my ass back on track and 30 days under my belt when I'm finished
Mycatisaninja
Whatever will help you. Are the twelve steps not fulfilling for you? Some people don't click with them.
keaoli
GO to a doctor?
oscarosmosis
A psychiatrist. ....that's OCD behavior
GreenMeggsAndHam
No its not. It may be Obsessive/Compulsive, but the act is due to drug use not a separate disorder. A therapist might be very useful.
pikzee
A dermatologist specifically
Saiunderscore
No no. That makes too much sense sir. She obviously wants help from the incredibly intelligent imgur community who all have PhDs.
thatswildman
not easy for everyone. especially since in america a dermo is considered cosmetic and almost never covered.
thatswildman
i.e. you have to pay ridiculous ridiculous bills to see one, even for one appointment.
thk5013
This. That's what they are there for!
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
This whole post seems odd... somethings off...
[deleted]
[deleted]
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
Like... more meth!
pikzee
I don't really understand why she came to imgur for such specific assistance. I think a support group or family would be able to offer more
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
Right?
Alyssandre
..out to Imgur's wide audience could be beneficial. Didn't know what to expect, just hoping for ideas n suggestions for speeding up process
Alyssandre
I tried googling treatments/fixes for (meth) face picking and only got results for compulsive behavior treatments. I figured throwing it (1)
Sockpuppetmastermind
I agree.... weird... It looks like acne
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
It is acne. She got high... picked her zits... then took photos and wrote signs and posted to imgur... Just feels weird...
dhaskjdhawyajhdbsdbgwakjhbdnmcckclkklkl
what?
ohthechestpain
The only thing abouot her that looks like a meth user is the things on her face. The rest of her face and hair etc looks normal to me.
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
Those are zits and wounds.
ohthechestpain
yeah thats what i mean, if those things were really from meth use, wouldnt also the rest of her loook more.. shitty?
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
Stimulants can cause repetitive behaviors like picking or scratching over and over again. It's plausible she got high just picked her face.
BenWyattCalzoneKingandIceTownClown
were missing a piece of the puzzle here and i hate to be that dude but its expected from a drug addict even after they're clean
MileHighLivin
Yeah... 16 hours into what? She's posting for awareness, then asks for help. Something definitely seems unusual to say the least.
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
16 hours since she was high on meth and picking her zits.
MileHighLivin
Yeah I just re read and caught that I missed she's asking for skin advice. Near the end it sounded like a "send me to rehab" thing.
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
2/2 signs, wrote up a thing and posted on imgur. Changed her profile description right after doing so.
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
1/2 I think it's odd she didn't know she could get medical treatment. I think the whole story of got high, picked zits, took pics, made
ESPN8theOchoa
But she said she was 90 days clean?
WeaverOfDreamsAtTheLoomOfTheMind3
was
TharsisDBard
Attention seeker. She has more problems than acne.
TheJerrySmith
so kinda shame on you for trying to minimize it
TharsisDBard
Nope. I'm actually maximizing it.
TheJerrySmith
i love how the term "attention seeker" is used to make problems seem less serious. It's still a serious issue and affecting her life
TharsisDBard
Not minimizing it. Just is. She needs help probably. "Attention seeking" is an actual medical term. Which is how I'm using it.
TheJerrySmith
Yes thank you, I'm in the field of psychology, so I know the term. You clearly used it as an insult.
WontSomeonePleaseThinkOfTheChildren
Don't be a dick. Clearly she needs help.
TharsisDBard
Yeah I know. That's why I said what I said. It's not a pejorative. It's an actual mental issue. She needs real help, not just skin care.
Alyssandre
Yes, that seems to be the top advice, I'll make an appt tomorrow since today's Sunday. I was hoping for some sort of at-home treatment
thegearheart
This looks like an immune disorder my cousin suddenly developed. It almost killed her. Go to a hospital!
SnapKylePop
What came of this? Has your complexion improved?
TheRealMisterSavage
Seeing a dermatologist would really help here!
ApplesdaKitty
yeah calling the doctor at home to meet at their office. please get better. dont let your progress go to any waste, you have made progress.
elahrairah
Treat it like a cut. wash and clean gently. leave the makeup off so it can breathe a little. You're not trying to impress anyone today.
BenHurovic
You do not have to be ashamed of going to the dermatologist. They see stuff like that every day. Without make-up.
Cereaza
Doctors see the worst shit, and they're like, "Hmm, ok. Looks like your hemorrhoid popped. Let's take care of that for you.
Sporkeldee
A dermatologist can prescribe some creams to help with scarring. May eventually need some grafts for the worst of itGood luck you're pretty
difficultdifficultlemondifficult
Definitely see a dermatologist immediately (try to get a same day appointment, tell them the situation). Otherwise in the meantime be 1/?
difficultdifficultlemondifficult
as gentle/careful as possible.Don't put anything crazy on the open sores,wash your hands before touching your face,DO NOT put on makeup. 2/?
difficultdifficultlemondifficult
Wash your face with a mild cleanser (cetaphil,etc) pat dry with a paper towel. A derm will prob prescribe some topicals to help with 3/?
difficultdifficultlemondifficult
healing and preventing infection. Once you're healed, then you can discuss options for the scarring. This may include retinoids, laser, 4/?
Onzid
Give your skin time to recover before you go back to using makeup. The more time without makeup, the faster your skin will heal. -notadoctor
Mycologics
I can't believe you didn't think of going to the doctor first... honestly. If my face started to look like that only a little I'd have gone
ohthechestpain
right? why are people downvoting you.
JamesCannotsay
Urgent care is open, or E.R.
TheNextGuy
Go to a dermitologist they specialize in skin care
gabbyh
I'm on mobile, so I can't PM. For the long term, I use the garnier dark spot corrector line. I had MRSA that left me with bad scarring (1/2)
gabbyh
(2/2) and as long as you use it regularly and keep your face clean it really helps lighten up marks and scars. Hope that helps a bit!
TheMayorOfTittyCity
It's not a wine stain on the sofa. It's your body and you are stuck with it your whole life. Doctors > random internet DIYs.
MrCurramba
isn't there an emergency unit you can go to today? even in my 3rd world country you could get good medical attention on sundays
Alyssandre
Yeah, there's urgent care. I didn't think this would qualify, but it wouldn't hurt to go I
Alyssandre
Something that I could do myself today, anything to help, bcuz I live at a Sober Living community and have plans w parents today.
BatmansUnderPantsAreSoSoft
Don't go to a doctor, go to a dermatologist, doctors are an absolute joke
SuckAnElf
You do realize a dermatologist is a doctor, right?
EloraLyon
Keep in mind that the body's biggest organ and toxin filter is skin. In addition to anxious picking, all of those chemicals have to leave1/?
etang600
You could also use dermatolistoncall.com . You upload pics and a doctor will form a treatment plan . It's pretty cheap too .
DiscoSockPuppets
a dermatologist will recommend some stuff but in the mean time, try vitamin D, Biotin and soothing lotions like cocoa butter serums.
mellowdrama
This is pretty serious. Infection is way worse than vanity. I'm sure you feel ashamed to have your parents see you, but they need to.
sillyblackcat
My advice is DON"T TOUCH IT. No creams no home remedies. They might help a little but they can also harm a lot. Don't risk it.
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sillyblackcat
What a lovely person you are :)
etang600
Knowing people that went through this , doctors will put you on an antibiotic and after a few months will recommend laser therapy .
laufox
Aloe vera gel might help tooand when it has healed and its gone to scar tissue, apply bio oil very lightly to help reduce scarring..
laufox
Also... Find something to preocuppy your hands so you're not tempted to pick
jigslinger
Vitamin E lotion helps with scarring.
ToastMasterLex
Don't put any creams or makeup or lotions on it! Just keep it clean. If it gets any darker, call someone professional sooner.
Anddew
15lb of concealer. Seriously tho just see a doctor and for your plans with your parents I'm sure they don't care about how you look
EloraLyon
your system. Through skin, kidneys, liver, etc. Drink a lot of water to help flush and see that dermatologist asap.