FrankenTurkey
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6136
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I'm calling it a social experiment
My favorite is Jasmine
absolutelynotme_irl
Tikityler
At least he got In N Out Burger #1
juneth
Sphagetti cake changed my life
iamthisguy247
As a dad, #1 speaks to me. Sometimes I'll think "oh, I'll fap in a little bit" then it's "Shit, they'll all be home soon". Then it's awkward
Maechas
The look on Adam Sandler is one of just pure "Tired of your shit".
SugarSmack
The Correct Answser is: Emailing a coworker the picture of your face pasted onto the body of a cat is not professional, Scott. Please, Scott
Breki
The amish don't wear suicide vests because they can't wear buttons.
UrsaUrsa
Seriously? Why no buttons?
GavinScreaming
You need new world inventions like buttons when you have God to hold your pants up!
SolidifiedSarcasm
That first one... it gets me
Pikachufighter
#14 disturbs me alot.
Pikachufighter
Some out of million people are getting fined for the fault of some dumb idiots, who think they do the right.
TeamToasterNeverForget
@ the one with johnny depp, they got a divorce so im assuming he actually wanted her dead??
ramonaflowers13
This actually breaks my cold black heart.
FightingRevengeOfYourMom
I'm so tired of Johnny Depp. Even in a random imgur photo I just want him to stop everything and go away.
rinimai
#21 With those nails? I don't think so. They will shred their partner's insides.
creamiestGreen
Shitpost
vandflasken
Wanted to check out The Jewish-Japanese Sex & Cook Book and How to Raise Wolves. It cost $285.. Well fuck.
jimieratchet
How the unholy crap is #2 unprofessional?
mikeatike
Unless you are a professional meme maker...
NuclearButtPlugFromPlanetX
http://imgur.com/AWUKghN
Mazzyyy
I ain't no princess.
LinguisticBitch
I wouldn't want those nails in my vagjujube and chocolate button even if she's hot.
DickPicEnthusiast
Vagjujube is such a childish way to refer to one's vajayjay.
LinguisticBitch
Well, as a lesbian, i like thinking a lady's part is candy. And I love jujubes.
DickPicEnthusiast
On that note, I remember hearing about a 'pink jelly bean', but as a gay man I'm not familiar enough with vergrubas to know if it applies .
LinguisticBitch
I don't think you would want to know. I mean, it wouldn't make you comfortable. But in scientific purposes, it's the clit.
DickPicEnthusiast
The little man in the canoe? I'm not really disturbed by it, just not interested, that's all. To each their own, I guess
imlostlolol
I thought I was pretty racist, bit can someone help me with the axe joke.
imlostlolol
Wow thanks guys. I learned something today
CorneliusCornwall
In the urban community "ask" is sometimes pronounced "axe" so it stands to reason the inverse be true
PompatusOfLove
Black people pronounce "ask" aks (Axe)
ForThoseWhoHaveHeart
Some black people say axe instead of ask so he reversed it. Like "hey let me axe you a question". So instead of axe they would say ask.
timberwolfc14
i love kylos lovly bosom
timberwolfc14
lovely
Coldshade
Finnish? You're a savage, that's what you are!
qwasson
I always upvote kitty tongue
Spookyactionman
Adam Sandler looks like that because he is trying to eat with his family and some twat is snapping a picture of him without permission.
Sprixxen
He looks like that all the time...Seriously, he just looks tired and worn out and like he's depressed all the time.
JackScagnetti1
How do u know this? From all his movies?
Sprixxen
Ya. Most recently The Ridiculous Six. He looks so miserable. Before that was Jack and Jill. Idk if it's just aging or he's actually sad.
yourmomisminenow
2 in the pink, 1 in the stink
kiddub
One time I saw this hottie taking a selfie with a homeless guy. He looked really depressed and I thought, how awful. It was Adam Sandler.
ProfessorWasp
Your point?
kiddub
Adam Sandler always looks like that.
rudejohn
I was at a resort in Tampa around father's day one year and Adam Sandler walked into their nice restaurant with his family. He looked happy.
kiddub
Cool. I'm assuming he's a nice guy, not trying to slam him.
rudejohn
Well, he didn't talk to anyone, so I can't vouch that he's nice or a jerk. He gave people kind of a cool "good afternoon" nod on his way in.
pancreas
Yeah, Adam Sandler's been in a rough patch since his last few movies bombed. Lost his house and everything.
memeseekoo
lost his house? he's worth like 320 million though? I googled and found nothing about losing his house?
pancreas
memeseekoo
I guess so. lol... I am pretty oblivious and gullible.. What was the joke?
rudejohn
I was at a resort in Tampa around father's day one year and Adam Sandler walked into their nice restaurant with his family. He looked happy.
TheSleepyIrish
Got some female hands doing the shocker... I can get behind that!
nottheactualcannibalshialabeouf
...Just don't let that get behind you.
MostOfYouArePathetic
With those nails? No way no how D-:
MrGatsby
My thoughts exactly.
pharmboy
You mean in front of that?
PompatusOfLove
Hooters isn't about hooters anymore. Shame.
thisisprocrastination
What's it about?
thisisprocrastination
What's it about?
SmilingHitler
The hokey pokey
CaptainMaximum
That fucking guy in the white chair. I want to BE him.
Twichy717
So, uhhm, Greg, what makes you think you would be good for this position?
ScreamedStableBoy
Definitely got a "deal with it" persona
HelpfulHomo
He looks very regal. Like you'd need an appointment to appear before the truckthrone.
CaptainMaximum
Opulence. He has it.
YarTheBug
*portable white chair of judgment
GeneralZappBrannigan
I saw a guy with a hammock set up in the back of a truck once, but this equals (maybe beats) it
OaksParcel
They call him Slow Horn.
CaptainMaximum
Shh. He is legend.
thebookih
"I've been expecting you, Mr. Bond."
TrippingPocahontas
for a while i thought you were talking about the little boy staring at the butts
BeardedWonder82
I misread white as wheel and kept scrolling through the pics looking for a guy in a wheel chair. I'm not a clever man.
CaptainMaximum
but i love you anyway
MiasmaCorrigan
The true trash king.
MrRandom314159
I'm sure you're all wondering why I gathered you here today.
Nathanfake
that's indian morpheus
CaptainMaximum
I'd take the red curry.
CommisarFuklaw
painterandagentleman
Underrated comment right there
FeelTheMightyCrotch
As a "proffecional mover" thats how one of the guys have to ride, but we make hamocks with straps and paths
ScreamedStableBoy
Erm professional?
RedDwarfIV
As a professional cyclist, "professional" =/= "good"
DeanSledgehammer
Looks like a man who has his shit together.
kingofsomeplace
"I call the-" "I CALL THE BACK CHAIR!!" "-DAMN it!"
istherelifeonmars
Life goals
Dalon5
I hear Amish isn't all rainbows
Hazaz
Neither is being a fat, drunk, lapsed-Catholic. But... I manage to get buy without killing folk.
DanivbDH27
A someone from PA Dutch Country, can confirm.
idunnogoddamwaterbottles
I don't mean to be an idiot but... Did they kill people?
slimstebow
A whole lot of raping
sarcastico
They drink like fish. drunk fish
tubbywolf
Oh have you seen that ghost rapes of Bolivia documentary too?!
MostOfYouArePathetic
No one said they were... But do they strap explosive vests onto their children?
roburtguy
well do they?
dpidcoe
I think this calls for a science experiment.
sionistic
I don't get the axe joke
DragonBapt
Neither do I. We're not racist! :D
oneofthosemeddlingkids
You should be glad, I think. I don't get it either.
dpidcoe
The accent often associated with black people makes "ask" sound like "axe", e.g. "lemme axe you a question"
ijustwantmycatandmycouch
Really? None of you? Can't tell if joking. .....
ijustwantmycatandmycouch
I don't know why i got downvoted. I was going to explain it if people genuinely didn't get it. Imgur is hard today :(
MostOfYouArePathetic
In a lot of African American dialects 'ask' is pronounced like 'axed', it's once of those things you'll notice from now on if you listen
Vectorman2
I could explain it to you, but by laws of the joke I would then be turning you racist.
Sororita
"Ask" is pronounced as "axe" in ebonics. Source: Mother was a janitor for a school and learned ebonics from coworkers.
NotATotalFag
Source: Big L - Ebonics
CheesegettiChef
Also, in some parts of Louisiana, they say "axe." Source: My white cousins in Louisiana who say "axe."
ForThoseWhoHaveHeart
Some black people say axe instead of ask so he reversed it. Like "hey let me axe you a question". So instead of axe they would say ask.
44no44
Is that a common black thing? I know tons of white people that do it, but none of my black friends do.
livychan1103
I was thinking the same thing! (From Florida, if that helps with context :P)
manualoverride
Sounds like I have successfully avoided black people enough to not know that. YAY, not racist!
wolfswool
"Yay I avoided black people! I'm not racist!".... Lol
manualoverride
wolfswool
That's why I laughed, I thought. STOP CONFUSING ME
JapaneseStudentTadashii
Some black people say "axe" instead of "ask". This is the reverse
nahemah
Yeeeea, about the Amish...try to read some confessions from people who lived in those communities
Harcorepkurharcoreprkur
I mean, wasn't there an entire reality show about a woman trying to help people escape Amish communities.
derptang
I think that FLDS not Amish
CheckOutMyFavorites
They more or less treat women and children exactly as extremist muslims do, without the bomb vests
Csel
each Amish community is separate from the next, their rules and practices differ based on what the local bishop decides.
Nobahdi
Just like a despot!
MostOfYouArePathetic
They strapped explosive vests on their children?!?!
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MostOfYouArePathetic
But they don't strap explosive vests on their children? Because that's literally all the Amish second of the post is about
ilikesomethings
Very very sexist. Treating women like they aren't really people. Women can't eat until men are done so there's a lot of malnourishment too
TheWombatStrikesAgain
No, some are just giant dicks who endanger others with their backwards and sexist ways. And call me an alarmist, but that's bad too.
MostOfYouArePathetic
But they don't strap explosive vests on their children? Because that is literally all the Amish section of the post is about
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Grimmsly
Dude all my neighbors are Amish, some are cool (new order) but then you have the old order Amish and those people are bat shit loony
humptyblargh
Yeah, but I'm absolutely convinced they haven't beheaded even one Englisher.
Grimmsly
The farthest they've gone is cutting off other Amish people's beards, that's basically a beheading in the Amish community though
TOASTEngineer
That stuff's very probably made up. I mean, I don't _know_, but I grew up in an Amish neighborhood and hung out with a lot of Amish. (cont.)
TOASTEngineer
There are Amish assholes, of course, but that doesn't mean anything. They're very traditional, which some people interpret as sexist (cont.)
TOASTEngineer
but it's not like you can't leave, and both sides of the male/female gender role dynamic hold up their part of the bargain.
BenShambrook
Man I know a bunch of Muslims, their really nice guys, super friendly etc. I think ISIL must be made up...
TOASTEngineer
... *sigh*
BenShambrook
There are plenty of well documented cases of awful abuse in Amish communities. But you think their made up cause you knew some Amish People
TOASTEngineer
There are plenty of well documented cases of Muslim people crashing planes into things, that doesn't mean that's normal.
diddlydee
I am not American. I would be very interested in a post about Amish life!
Kiwi31415
Seconded. Most of my understanding of it comes from Weird Al.
Meqad
* @sarah
nahemah
there was one on imgur a while ago
TOASTEngineer
They make everything themselves, work hard, and are pretty much the chillest people possible. People like to make shit up about them.Dassit.
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oxymorin
Dot
aboxacaraflatafan
Having grown up with a ton of Amish, that contains a lot of personal experience that doesn't match everyone's. It's hard to talk about 1/2
aboxacaraflatafan
any religion at all when it's so varied. That person's [somewhat disturbing!] experience is not unheard of, but it's not everyone's. 2/2
yeahitsmesorry
Of course each is a portion and not wholly representative
CristhianIR
No religious belief/behavior is totally free of some extremists or crazy fanatics. Respect. Responsibility. Don't be a jerk. Super simple.
freyjaboo
Except it's kinda across the board abuse with them
GrizzlyWicks
No it isnt. some are great people its the person thats good or bad not the religion, skin colour, or gender
joeyjojosharknado
Belief systems can be good or bad too (or rather, have more or less propensity to cause shitty behaviour). I mean, that's pretty obvious.
anonyx
Their beliefs generally have the women and girls left starving off scrap from what I've read. Like, extremely commonplace and not a one off.
anonyx
Happy to be wrong though
Kiwi31415
I believe Pastafarianism is free from crazies (apart from that guy that tried to fuck a jar of spaghetti sauce)
Hobohead
Sick reference bro
MugsMoney
A guy in DC has his entire house plastered with giant Obama billboards and flies at least 3 Spaghetti Monster flags out front at all times.
Kiwi31415
Probably the same guy.