She's my little bean burrito

Jul 28, 2024 7:43 PM

ubermonkey21

Views

32165

Likes

853

Dislikes

38

It's true. I'm absolutely in love with my fiancee. She and I both gas each other out. And we always laugh about it.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

No naked flames please

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

This girl needs some fiber!

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

And I'm never gonna meet her, so atleast she's comfy.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The music in the background is "Echo Sax End" by Caleb Arredondo, for anyone who's wondering.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Dont tell the single guys about the period stains...

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

Oh no. Absolutely tell them. If they can’t handle farts and or period stains then they need to stay single forever.

2 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You're damn right she is lol

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Good! We can make a stinky symphony together!

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Chili is musical soup.

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I know she is because she sleeps right next to me. I firmly believe women hold farts in during the day, and then when they sleep, they come shooting out like a machine gun.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Heh, I (a guy) am the opposite. Nobody has ever once commented on me farting in my sleep and, every morning, I 💨 a great volume of wind. Once I woke up thinking I /maybe/ had to fart but went to the bathroom just in case it was something else. A liquid explosion on the john seemed to confirm that I keep everything in when sleeping.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiig sniff

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

v

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

Looks like my big spoon just upgraded to a jetpack

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Accurate

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So what? we can start a contest.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I hope the guy lying next to her chokes on those farts.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Lying* in bed.

2 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 2

Meh, That's one of those that are interchangeable depending on which version of English you grew up with

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

Nope, she's laying pipe right now

2 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

Exhaust pipe

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Am...am I the girl of your dreams?

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

one word

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Good, that means she's well fed and comfy.

2 years ago | Likes 249 Dislikes 2

And her feet are warm

2 years ago | Likes 31 Dislikes 0

That's the farts

2 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

Adding flavour

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Or she's your cup of Choco milk.

2 years ago | Likes 29 Dislikes 2

This happened to me recently while driving down the highway. Picked up my hubby from his job site to take him to the ER from heat exhaustion. Thought it was a toot. Ran up my back like I was a baby in a diaper. 17 years in .... He ain't goin nowheres, ey

2 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

What chemical reaction did I just watch?

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Not chemical, thermal. They just dropped a ridiculously hot metal ball into a glass of chocolate milk. There are a lot of these types of vids. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEXsdxnvOoE&list=PLdaY7AftAv5V6klLhQGi_UDZEeeWxgqOe

2 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

Interesting, thank you for the info.

2 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

I mean i already eat her ass 3 times a week so its not like thats going to scare me off...

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

finding out what would scare off a clayman

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

At this point, even im not sure...

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

This you?

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

...maybe. Why, you got ideas? 😂

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Never understood guys who thought a woman farting or doing any other normal human function was a turn off. My ex(the one who got away. Long story) but I remember she accidently let a behemoth of a fart loose, like the ones that start switching gears, god I fell in love with her even more that day. Not cause it’s a fetish or anything but she thought it was going to be a little squeaker but even surprised her when it hit 4th gear so she starts laughing right along with me

2 years ago | Likes 79 Dislikes 4

My ex wouldn't let me speak of normal bodily functions, farting in his presence, not permitted. My current husband of 20 years defers to my impressive butt bellows, even tho I blame them on our cat.

2 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

It took three years for my ex to be comfortable peeing with the door open around me.

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Everyone knows women fart, they don't poop which is what most men confuse that with. The female body is too efficient and it's bodily functions turn most organic matter into glitter.

2 years ago | Likes 24 Dislikes 0

That's all menstruation is- the monthly glitter extraction.

2 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

Whenever my ex farted and was embarrassed I'd say "it's almost as if you're a normal, functioning, human being!". I don't understand the shame either.

2 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Its a turn off for me because my ex's farts could be considered toxic warfare under the Geneva conventions and I'm not a nurgle worshipper. I mean yeah, everybody does it but no need to go the extra mile dude.

2 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

Never understood people who consider farting a turn on

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

It's not a turn off in the sense of 'women should be pretty sparkle glitter fairies' but it's not a turn on either. It's just not a sex thing. The turn off is stuff like this that blurs that distinction because then it verges into fetish territory and for most people bodily functions like farting aren't a fetish but I think that gets lost in translation to a degree and just comes out to 'bodily functions are a turn off'.

2 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

Just say the butt is sexy and you are a little confused.... This sounds like a teenager explaining to their parents how much they don't find someone attractive....

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1