PineappleIsDeliciousOnPizzaFightMe
105729
1668
35
Sep 12, 2023 1:21 PM
PineappleIsDeliciousOnPizzaFightMe
105729
1668
35
HypnagogicHallucinations
You don't want a retelling, you want to read the original Grimm fairy tale.
boxmeister
Sooooo Morticia Addams?
SpectreA19
I mean...my wife has lips as red as a rose, hair as black as ebony, and skin as pale as snow....
koolerthanjinx
AllTheGoodOnesWereGone
A good tip for writing characters is to never describe any feature that you can leave to the reader's imagination. "Just then the most beautiful person in the world walked through the door." leaves everything up to the reader's own ideal. Leave it undefined unless it's actually relevant.
SubnetTwelve
so after all the stepmother was the good one.
dednaHtfeLmI
nope! still a bitch
Imapseudonym
It's a perfect description for Morticia Addams.
Zap117
Well these stories are old and usually allot darker than the Disney version of them
MidlandRedux
Harlan Ellison wrote this story about sixty years ago. Other fantasy writers have made the effort. But, there's always room for a new twist.
greggbert
That doesn't sound like a monster it sounds like Anne Hathaway
slyvonschwarz
Hair white as snow eyes red like blood, the CURSED cursed remake yall missed
afnoot42
But she wasn't invited into the dwarves' hone
mafiacarstarter
Sometimes, things are assumed to have happened in stories without actually having them included explicitly in the text. She lives there, and the dwarfs don't complain. It can reasonably be assumed that she is welcome there.
Grinch01
Nobody invted her to the house of the dwarfs so she couldn't enter if she was a vampire
Nightchime
If we're taking the story literally, I'd also enjoy a retelling where the evil queen gets around the "love's first kiss" clause by just orchestrating it such that the kiss happens *before* being cursed. Can't have a second first kiss!
CyborgScribe
This is why my mistresses eyes are nothing like the sun
TheStreetForce
Canofminus
Yeah, "works" if you ignore the whole "who's the fairest of them all" thing.
delecti
In the "Indexing" books by Seanan McGuire, fairy tales are repeating archetypes, and the main character is "a Snow White" living in the modern day. People find her to be exactly as unsettling as that description would lead you to think.
STRiPESandShades
"Fairest" by Gail Carson Levine also explores this where she's considered piteously ugly by everyone and needs to overcome some extreme self-esteem issues because of it
[deleted]
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BotDrawA
[NSFW] @RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Cybergoth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and skin white as snow, in style of David Finch"
BotDrawA
[NSFW] @RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Cybergoth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and skin white as snow"
BotDrawA
[NSFW] @RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Steampunk Goth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and skin white as snow, lollipop"
BotDrawA
[NSFW] @RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Steampunk Goth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and skin white as snow"
Malinut
The tale of Snow White was told by the victors.
mafiacarstarter
I thought Frankenstein was told by the Victor.
nitemayr
I feel like these people have never seen "A Goth" before
ranbro
Red lips, black hair and white skin reminds me of most of the Japanese women I know.
whatbuttondoipush
Probably arsnic poisoning
q34tw4
"she'd look like a walking nightmare" you can tell this person is clearly airing out some insecurities or has something else going on because wtf.
mafiacarstarter
You aren't paying attention to the words. Skin is NEVER white as snow. That shit would look freaky. Like kabuki, but clearly without the makeup. It's the sort of thing that your deep lizard brain would see as wrong and bad.
q34tw4
You arent paying attention to the fact that there are so many pale ass people out here om the world. Hell I work with 2 of them and one wears sunblock whenever the sun is out because she gets easily burned. What is with people on the internet thinking they have seen every person. And both of those pale people are hot! "skin is NEVER" gtfooooo
afgncap
She wouldn't be just pale, pale is nice, she would like like Zuckerberg on a beach.
mafiacarstarter
Yeah, I can get a sunburn from sitting too close to a bright student. If my skin turned as white as SNOW, I'd get to a doctor as fast as possible.
DoNotQuitYourDayJob
@BotDrawA Snow White, with lips black as ebony, skin red as a rose, and hair white as snow
BotDrawA
[NSFW] @DoNotQuitYourDayJob Here's your drawing of a "Snow White, with lips black as ebony, skin red as a rose, and hair white as snow"
BotDrawA
[NSFW] @DoNotQuitYourDayJob Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Psychedelic Snow White, with lips black as ebony, skin red as a rose, and hair white as snow"
DoNotQuitYourDayJob
@BotDrawA Snow White, with black lips, red skin and white hair.
BotDrawA
[NSFW] @DoNotQuitYourDayJob Here's your drawing of a "Snow White, with black lips, red skin and white hair."
BotDrawA
[NSFW] @DoNotQuitYourDayJob Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Snow White, with black lips, red skin and white hair., puppet in style of Wendy Froud"
mistermixelpix
I have run out of words for how tired I am of "omg this old fairy tale is secretly really scary." They're fucking analogies you goddamn walnuts. Jesus christ.
wintermute93
If you're going to be this pedantic you should at least know what an analogy is, lmao. The word you're looking for is "simile", you absolute walnut.
TresusIbor
Shut up and drink your fucking Ovaltine.
JayDeeDubs
Retelling these stories with new wrinkles is a big part of why they've persisted for hundreds, sometimes thousands, of years.
mistermixelpix
It's not a new wrinkle to go "omg what if fairy tale but scary?" That is the oldest wrinkle imaginable. It's what every hack fanfic writer has been doing since people learned how to write. The only more cliche bullshit is "omg what if the whole thing was in the main character's imagination?"
JayDeeDubs
"Omg what if fairy tale but scary" usually *was* the original version, which then got toned down, sanitized and bowdlerized. Thanks for coming out though
mistermixelpix
Hello there! I took a course on fairy tales in college, I know the origins of these things. Fun fact, Snow White was never a horror story about a vampire, the "scary" part was that it was intended as a cautionary tale for little girls about having sex before marriage, which is why the snow/virgin white girl is nearly killed by a blood-colored apple only to be saved by a prince who marries her. Good attempt, though! :)
JayDeeDubs
A whole course wow! And now you're the sole arbiter of how fairy tales are allowed to be retold. That's quite a feather in your cap. But fortunately I took a learning annex class once on things that are painfully obvious, so I know that 1) this was always a *hypothetical retelling*, and 2) fairy tales are not allegories with direct, one to one meanings.
bannedagain80
explain the analogies please.
mistermixelpix
Okay so check this out. It's a COMPARISON, but it needn't be ABSOLUTELY LITERAL, right? Like if I say "the guy was the size of a grizzly bear," you might notice he wasn't ACTUALLY nine feet tall and 700 pounds, it's just being descriptive.
LustrousShadow
I'm assuming you meant something other than "analogies," but I can't figure out what.
PrastaryOrk
Metaphor.
mistermixelpix
No, I meant analogies. They're not meant to be literal. When they say "skin as white as snow" they didn't mean literally fucking 255,255,255 RGB, it was just saying "very pale skin."
mistermixelpix
And yes I know every elementary school student thinks "omg it says like or as so that makes it a simile" but analogy is ALSO valid here because it's a comparative statement.
SomeDetroitGuy
An analogy is argumentative. A simile is descriptive. This is not an analogy. "Snow White was as evil as a Nazi" is an analogy.
mistermixelpix
This is 100% incorrect. The literal dictionary definition of analogy is "a comparison between two things, typically for the purpose of explanation or clarification." I swear you guys need to take 15sec to double check what you say before posting.
SomeDetroitGuy
That is a simile not an analogy.
LustrousShadow
Ah. Since you were bitching about people coming up with adaptations of fairy tales, as though the bowdlerized versions most of us love aren't just examples of the same, I read that as you calling the fairy tale in it's entirety an analogy.
mistermixelpix
Well in fairness that's ALSO true. The origin of the story is that it's a cautionary tale about sex. The girl is "snow white" (as in virgin white) and she eats the red apple (representing menstrual blood), which leads to her near death. I took a college course on fairy tales, oddly enough, focusing on Russian stories but also more general ones. MOST of them are about sex lmao
WenTheEternallySurprised
The whole post starts with "If". It's a thought experiment. It doesn't say "Snow White literally had...white skin." It says "IF Snow White literally had...white skin". You need to back off the vitriol and put in some basic reading practice.
mistermixelpix
Fun fact: there's a second post which says "which would also explain..." followed by a summary of the story, implicating that the "if" from the first post is, to them, a valid interpretation because it supposedly explains how the rest of the story proceeds, and that's what I was taking issue with. I realize there were a ton of words after the first one but believe it or not the rest of them are also important.
sturmhauke
Fun fact: you don't need a shovel, you're digging that hole deeper just fine on your own. Good work buddy!
WenTheEternallySurprised
Yes, they were playing the game with the first post. IT'S HOW LANGUAGE AND CONVERSATION WORK, you angry little muppet. Fun Fact: Being randomly sarcastic and caustic does not make you look smart. It makes you look like a fucking idiot with a false sense of adequacy.
RummageSaleBubbler
Or she's goth? @BotDrawA { Goth, Cybergoth, Victorian Goth, Gothic Lolita, Steampunk Goth, Haute Goth } Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow
ISayShenanigans
A goth Snow White sounds better than whatever Disney is churning out with the help of prunes.
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Goth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Gothic Lolita Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow, at Burning Man, butterflies, serene, divine, magical"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Haute Goth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow fighting a thick swarm of flies at a lake"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Steampunk Goth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow, wearing an angel wings outfit at Burning Man"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Victorian Goth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow, at Burning Man, wearing silver temporary facial tattoos"
RummageSaleBubbler
Pretty sure I met Snow White at Burning Man this year.
Soufange
How was the rain?
RummageSaleBubbler
We took 12-13 gallons of water from the floor of the Hexayurt.
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Gothic Lolita Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Haute Goth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Cybergoth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow, in a giraffe onesie outfit"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Cybergoth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Victorian Goth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Steampunk Goth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow"
RailedRobin
Nightmarish. Truly nightmarish.
RummageSaleBubbler
Is it though?
NurdleOnTheBeach
Yes. Please stop gumming up the comments section with this "AI" rubbish.
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Porcelain statue of Goth Snow White, lips red as a rose, hair black as ebony, and face white as snow"
LordOfDaemon
This is closer to "face white as snow"
Eiladar
"Fingers as wobbly as used prophylactics"
JayDeeDubs
Neil Gaiman beat you to it
Sensiblyinteresting
Just read the comic because of this comment, the art was beautiful, loved the rendition
SpaceMarineWithAnUrgeToPurge
Of course he did.
Nathanyel
The "Simpsons did it first" of literature
DrRad
It was a good read.
potatotheloaf
You beat me to saying mail gaiman beat you to it
mafiacarstarter
Does that mean we get to just beat you?
OddestMouse
While we are all celebrating Neil Gaiman, check out 'Signs of Life', a collaboration with the Fourplay string quartet. the album: https://neilandfourplay.lnk.to/signsoflife & a review: https://www.everblack.com.au/2023/05/11/neil-gaiman-fourplay-string-quartet-signs-of-life-review/
Aelonwy
Red as Blood, or Tales from the Sisters Grimmer by Tanith Lee beat Gaiman to it by more than a decade.
MelodiousDissonance
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alianMoonCat
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PrincessWendyB
THANK YOU
JayDeeDubs
Well, fair enough
Dishware
.
DoNotQuitYourDayJob
Oh, Tanith Lee, I remember reading, what's the english name, something like "Tales of the flat earth"? With antihero demons as main characters?
deblou
Oh this sounds exactly like something I would enjoy.
hahway
Yup! Good old Azhrarn
RummageSaleBubbler
@BotDrawA Snow White in "Snow, Glass, Apples" written by Neil Gaiman
NurdleOnTheBeach
Asking AI to mimic something illustrated by an actual human being is incredibly disrespectful. The artist is Colleen Doran & you can find her work in print and on her social media.
xlr82xs
"Dear NurdleOnTheBeach, as Neil Gaiman once said, 'Make good art, but remember to find solace in the gentle whispers of the waves. Let your worries be carried away by the tide. Relax, for creativity thrives in the embrace of tranquility.'" -- ChatGPT 3.5
KilliK69
@BotDrawA Neil Gaiman as Snow White
BotDrawA
@KilliK69 Here's your drawing of a "Neil Gaiman as Snow White"
BotDrawA
@KilliK69 Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "A priest, a rabbi, a minister, and Neil Gaiman as Snow White walk into a bar"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Snow White in "Snow, Glass, Apples" written by Neil Gaiman"
WilliamKeith
It was illustrated by Colleen Doran.
RummageSaleBubbler
Yep, I was pointing out this is the name of Neil's book. But let's do your better prompt... @BotDrawA Snow White in "Snow, Glass, Apples", illustrated by Colleen Doran
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Snow White in "Snow, Glass, Apples", illustrated by Colleen Doran"
Kukabuksilaks
@BotDrawA Snow White in "Snow, Glass, Apples", illustrated by H.R. Giger
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Snow White in "Snow, Glass, Apples", illustrated by Colleen Doran, at Burning Man"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Snow White in "Snow, Glass, Apples" written by Neil Gaiman, in a bell jar"
doppelfisch
Rose McGowan vibes.
RummageSaleBubbler
Ok, let's see.. @BotDrawA Snow White portrayed by Rose McGowan
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your drawing of a "Snow White portrayed by Rose McGowan"
BotDrawA
@RummageSaleBubbler Here's your (experimental extra) drawing of a "Snow White portrayed by Rose McGowan, assemblage art sculpture made of recycled materials"
dasobserver
What title should I be on the lookout for?
nubblebun
Snow, glass, apples
Smidge204
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snow,_Glass,_Apples
TracynKyrayc
Thanks !
[deleted]
[deleted]
deblou
Aw man, popups EVERYWHERE. Booooooo!
[deleted]
[deleted]
Ingellvar
SunBrolem
God damn
YsgramorsSoupSpoon
That plot
BrokenAnimal
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ConfusedAxis
Department of Transportation
celestedrake
Nice.
truemetalman
Holy fuck Neil, go a little harder why don't you?
BlueDsc
Ohey, I actually own one of the books that has this short story. The book is called Smoke and Mirrors.
Equinox42
Smoke and Mirrors is good. Check out the Neil Gaiman Reader if you more short stories from him (there are few duplicates but it's worth it.)
ThisUserNameMightBeTaken
Dotting here for something to read later.
DoomBuggie
**doot
CrimeBrulee
Jesus Fuck that's dark
kinarism
It was the ending of that plot synopsis (clearly spoilers ahead) that really brought it all home. "The prince and the princess have the queen imprisoned throughout the autumn, turning the people against her by vilifying her with lies that would morph into a fairy tale with a "happy ending."
BlueDsc
It's a very realistic ending.
wintermute93
Also the full text is only 5000 words, you can read the whole thing here instead of the plot summary: https://thedreaming.moteofdust.com/1999/10/10/snow-glass-apples/
karvec
Funny story, I went to bookmark it and I already had it bookmarked!! What a coincidence!
yummilicious
BrokenAnimal
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080080
deblou
If I could give multiple updoots, you'd have them my friend. Doing the real "god" s work! 💜
ItHappenedInThe20thCentury
an @ExtraUpvote for this hero here, please
farfie
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HappyOutsideDeadInside
Filing dot!
myotherusernameisalreadytaken