MattyMan01234
197597
15380
808
May 26, 2016 2:35 PM
MattyMan01234
197597
15380
808
Kilo11
Life hack #768. If you stop calling them life hacks, humanity will like you again
grandmastonguekiss
I'm eating bread with broken glass and rubbing vodka on my teeth. Bloody, Drunk and nauseous, but I learned to life hack.
Savushkin
Netflix has a proxy detector, so Hola Unblocker won't allow you to watch any of the shows- just see them listed, in a cruel mockery.
theSaint17
1. Also not 100% on the Shell free air hack, BUT in most states gas stations are required by law to give u free air/water for your
theSaint17
2. Vehicle, just ask the clerk inside go turn the air on for you. I live in Cali and have never paid for air from a gas station.
PrincessNausicaa
Some of these are immoral.
ArcaneM37
And most of them are false
smllsliketeensprt
About the French fries, they will also spit in them.
totallyofficialdalton
Dear Tesla, I've been a big fan until recently...
MethrandiroftheHighCouncil
Fun Fact: A guy bugged Tesla so much about the delay in getting his Model X that they blacklisted him from purchasing a Tesla
RichyR
"Just have your free fucking car, alright?!?"
ReluctantGeek
Let us know how that works out for ya...
balencedrago
Ah yes, i too enjoy sending out time traveling letters to historical figures. Just last week i sent one out to Paul revere letting him know1
balencedrago
well... ive said to much
TheTipTopTopHat
I got myself a pair of lanterns from some church.
pessimus
#130: How to be a lying dick.
HeyOhBotchedToe
Lie Facts
DrewF650GS
Excuse me miss, please wait here while I get my slit lamp from my car to measure your pupils. Will also need your medical record to compare
Idunnolel
if i sit in bed for 365 days a year for nasa i can make 62k / yr.. hmm
MissTCShore
You'll also weigh 400 pounds, so you can go a year without eating. Then at the end of the year, buy a loaf of bread and break some glass...
Justareallyniceperson
Some of these....no...MOST of these are either Complete bullshit or helps you be a shittier person.
spudcosmic
Ha. EssayTyper is a joke website. It just copies the Wikipedia article of whatever topic you put in.
thirdusername
ye my professor noticed <.<
khaleesimotherofkittycats
Which is hilarious, because dumb asses who can't be bothered to work for shit will have to face consequences.\
DoctorWatchamacallit
so what you are saying is they have successfully created a lazy moron trap/
kublaikhan
Then explain how I was able to type an amazing essay on the Fluidity of List of Seinfeld Episodes in under 4 minutes!
crii
I asked it to type me an essay on the topic of "Hitler Did Nothing Wrong", and it typed me an essay on the history of mt. Dew. 10/10
khaleesimotherofkittycats
Which is hilarious, because dumb asses who can't be bothered to work for shit will have to face consequences.\
Gr8tgOoglymoOgly
I just scrolled... to say.... fuck you.
MuayThaiKitty
#2 Oh you say you don't like me?! I disagree! *drags person out of the sun* Ha!
Yiffer5000
I laughed harder than I should have...
suhdudes
#130 is literally fraud. Are you telling me to commit a crime, imgur?
takethatwizardglick
I took notes using WingDings, it didn't help me remember anything
goldengodtroy
Dvdonme for redbox is bogus
AyTeeLien
Hola doesn't work with Netflix anymore. They done wised up...
BelayzBoy
Instructions unclear, ate glass sandwich.
wretchednetch
Toothpaste on ink doesn't work. You're just gonna waste your time.
machounicorn
Rubbing alcohol is better, depending on ink & fabric type. It usually works well on ballpoint pen ink on cotton or polyester blend. Ymmv.
drakma
Hairspray sometimes works, too.
MalinorTheMagnificent
The one about living for a year without eating if you weigh over 400 pounds is bullshit. Your body will eat your heart muscle for protein.
colonelraleigh
Only if you have astonishingly little muscle anywhere else.
MalinorTheMagnificent
If you weigh 400 pounds you probably have very small muscles from non-use.
goodguygonebad
Mom... why are your pupils always dilated?
briedis
That's how far I got until I scrolled to comments
iamalreadyaghost
Drugs, for having to deal with your shit daily
pineapplepuppy
(If you meet someone for the first time, how do you gauge pupil size?)
ImGonnaRickRollYou
Don't worry about it Oedipus
TheTipTopTopHat
Motherfucker...
ImGonnaRickRollYou
I see what you did there.
junedug
https://media.giphy.com/media/IUZtGhVO8hZ6w/giphy.gif
RetroPhantom
Don't know if this is sweet or creepy...
brownsugga
DUUUUDE!!!
napili1
*Sigmund Freud's ghost grows stronger*
Zarlicious
Igotthatreference.gif
NotAWeebISwearToNepNep
Calm down there, Habsburg
xgilgaladx
And tuck that jaw in! (Prognathism is not attractive, yo)
SerialKitten666
The pupils dilate when you see things you love actually applies to like anything you "love", it's not about romance. It's also never 100%
Moobbles
Works the same for 'intent to murder' too. Saw it on the web, so it must be true.
goodguygonebad
excuse my language but can't a guy just make a mother fucking joke!!??
VeeTheGee
Heh.
kawaiikittyDICK
To download some hidden jews, just put "SS" at the end of the URL.
KapnKershaw
I hear they're everywhere.
AttackPenguin666
Pretty sure weighing over 400 pounds does not mean you can live for a year without eating
DrTacticalKeyboard
I recall hearing about a man that did just that
srishsalmon
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2495396/pdf/postmedj00315-0056.pdf
srishsalmon
Here's a study in which a 456lb man fasted for over a year, though he was under constant medical supervision and took multivitamins
AttackPenguin666
And you wouldn't survive in the wilderness or the desert for example without food. The effort required to survive would burn huge calories
AttackPenguin666
Interesting. However the multivitamins he took were extensive, replacing everything but pure calories. He would likely have been weak.
babyhipposareadorable
Fuck the McDonalds one. As a McDonalds worker, I will make fresh fries for anyone who asks. I will not give you salt for your unsalted fries
ariafiresong
So, if I got unsalted fries for my mom, but wanted salt and pepper for my burger, I'd have to go to a different place?
benjmonster
so a person with salt sensitivity who legitimately needs significantly less salt on their fries is just screwed? excellent customer service.
babyhipposareadorable
No they can ask for no salt, and I'll make them fresh with no salt, but if they ask for salt packets at the window, we're fresh out
benjmonster
so no customer service. not surprising.
babyhipposareadorable
Well fuck the assholes who come in and try and trick us into getting fresh fries by asking for no salt. (1/2)
babyhipposareadorable
Like I said, I don't mind making unsalted fries but if you're doing it to "hack" us into fresh fries, fuck you. You're not funny (2/2)
frontrangeatlantic
salt sensitivity...? lol
benjmonster
also, do you always 'lol' when someone mentions a malady you've never heard of?
benjmonster
yes. while they shouldn't be eating fast food in the first place with that ailment, they're going to anyway, no reason to make it worse 1/2
benjmonster
with bad customer service. http://www.webmd.com/heart-disease/news/20001025/salt-sensitivity-increases-heart-disease-death-risk
AsABiologistWhoIsNotFunAtParties
zero sympathy for anyone who has increased heart disease risk and visits a mcdonalds.
Bristolian
I looked into the eyes of someone I like and their pupils only expanded 43%. Do they like me back?
WeAreAllStonedAsFuck
We are the 2%
Mentok
They're horney but also have light indigestion
yesyeswhateva
Sorry, no.
KapnKershaw
Cop a feel and get your answer!
StandardDeviant
They just like you as a friend
HotelFourSix
Life Hack: threaten strangers while using a weapon and they will give you money for free to leave them alone!
MyLightBulbJustBurnedOut
Neat!
CptJohnYossarian
Lower your food costs by using the weapon on yourself!
WeAreAllStonedAsFuck
Lmao
GodzillaHarddiskson
You can save money on a bullet if you instead target a cop!
SnarkeyMonkey
The elevator hack is BS...
fnordy
Always wondered about that one.
SurvivalNeverGoesOutOfStyle1
As an electrician who frequently works on elevators I can absolutely confirm that it's BS
IReadTheUsername
As a person who has ever taken an elevator, I can also confirm. Without the trade skill.
TurdsOfWisdom
Seriously. You'd never get picked up if you were on a middle floor in a building.
DangerousNoodle
I've used it as a delivery driver, worked every time. It's an emergency trick for medical and police personel.
YoWhatUpGlasgow
It doesn't stop me trying
fooker
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHf1vD5_b5I complete bullshit
Aerolfoz
Saw another one on double pressing a button to cancel it... does not work either. Would have been incredibly useful too, elevator is random
Aerolfoz
suddenly despite not pressing anything (Say loading/unloading so it's open a while) it will have 2-3 buttons pressed and goes there...
procrastinatorsunite111nextweek
I feel like it probably wasn't BS but was mainly used for emergency situations until they implemented the key system that they have now
SurvivalNeverGoesOutOfStyle1
It's never been a thing.
procrastinatorsunite111nextweek
Wonder where the thought came from then
SurvivalNeverGoesOutOfStyle1
Hmmm . Good question.
andrewprice
Could be BS, but on AskReddit a guy said that he made it up as a joke circa 2000 and it went viral. He was shocked people believed it.
HaydenMcLaen
Saying something is unsatisfactory just to get free shit is scummy as all hell
[deleted]
[deleted]
JPRiddles
Not gas, air.
MrSomeguy
I missed the word "air", oops.
Pacdude167
It's also how companies will stop sending stuff out when people do actually have a defective or unsatisfactory product.
SnaggleToothedTiger
'cause corporations have so much to lose...
ThatJerkYouKnow
"hacks" *air quoting intensifies*
Dogfoodlidildoofgod
I don't even know you!! *Concern intensifies*
Sairvous
Its highly unethical.
LoganSchott
I won't say it if it isnt true. I bought the xbox one a year ago. It died like 2 months later and i called and bitched and gota free xbox1/2
DudePlayinADudeDisguisedAsAnotherDude
Who gives a shit? It isn't like companies aren't scummy as hell. With a shit ton of profits. Fuck 'em.
LoganSchott
2/2 and one year gold and 3 games of choice. So yeah.
HaydenMcLaen
Yeah, if there's actually a problem that you did not cause, then it's alright to call. Otherwise it's not
LoganSchott
Yeah. I played it probably 3 times in that two months. I did nothing wrong. For once.
TheMortimis
I normally like you comments, but my recent viewing of this comment has been unsatisfactory.
PeanutPirate
Oh no! We are dearly sorry for your experience with us. Here is a more satisfactory comment as well as a free upvote! -Imgure
HaydenMcLaen
What?
secondcoming
HaydenMcLaen
Oh god damnit I'm dumb