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BTW I did get my (much needed) hysterectomy and I feel great!
Apr 7, 2021 2:35 AM
4reddit100
92743
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ScaryTransgenderPersonInTheRestroom
It’s my goddamn body, I should be able to do whatever I want with it. Want bigger boobs? NP! Don’t wanna get preggo? Now hold up a minute...
mrsdowneyjr
But people are fine with people having children. That's a lifelong choice too
maugriman
As an adopted child, you're damned right im baby
CreaturesThatCrawl
I was told all my 20s that they'll take my baby maker out at 30... now I'm 30 and fighting with my insurance company.
notsosubtle
Congrats! Had mine in June 2020 after a literal decade (and me almost dying in Mar. 2020) to get them to approve it. Feel SO much better now
doedelbuesi
i'm really glad my family has always been very supportive towards my decision to not have kids and get my babyfactory defused.
Onsvaltti
No regrers here, either. My fiance suffers through her own periods tho, but luckily I know exactly what to do ?✨
breakingthorns
My friend was 32 when she was told this. Apparently 32 year old women aren't old enough to make their own life choices.
Mermaidgirl916
Like women don't know their own mind! Good for you op.
valen00
Well it *is* called a hysterectomy for a reason ;-P (this is sarcasm)
Mermaidgirl916
That was honestly hilarious. Nicely done.
valen00
80% was in the setup, you have a nice day now ;-)
Spinosaur
Funny how women who are too young for sterilization bc they might change their mind are also old enough to decide to have a child
peachesforme
keep in mind some of these fuckers thing a 12 year old is old enough to have a baby
Astral134
Cat is baby.
Killerismycat
1/2 Adoption in the US is absolutely fucked. We tried to adopt a few years ago and they want us to be practically millionaires.
Killerismycat
2/2 In addition to having an issue with a managed mental health issue from when my wife was 15
Talisign
Was going to say something similar. 9 months of pregnancy and childbirth is the easy way.
HellfireJags
While doctors making sure you understand irreversible procedures is important, it is your life, your body, and your choice. Speedy recovery.
dfhowes
Can confirm. We adopted twice. http://imgur.com/h2uAje9
IPlayWithFire
Some people cant get over their biological evolutionary imperatives such as the need to pass on ones own specific genes above all others
IPlayWithFire
... And it shows ...
PerpetuityPhoto
Parents who try to push their kids to have kids are weird... It's like they're like "Y'ALL FUCKIN' YET!?"
Zmokahontas
Haha! I think the same. Why y’all want to know we fucked?
sparkletempt
Anything permanent about your body should be taken seriously and yes, adoption is real parenthood too.
ScorneontheCob
Baby IS baby!
kuhzoo
... but how will you know what time it is if you don't have a period anymore?!?!
SeasonCat
Glad you feel well afterwards. Keep on keeping on!
couch11
CONGRATS!!!!I got my tubes tied when I was 29; 16 years ago Woot!! I never regretted it.
NavaHo07
Told someone I worked with I was considering adoption and they said "you don't want a used baby". Oof_size -> large
pandagrrl
Holy fuck what an insensitive thing to say :(
NavaHo07
This is the same person that told me he would join that oregon wildlife refuge from 2016, so he's a giant asshoe
pandagrrl
If its too personal ignore, but did you make a decision? I wanted a baby but now im not able to have one and hadnt considered it until now
NavaHo07
We decided to have biological children. Adoption is still in the table for number 3
ThePickles
“THINK ABOUT THE CHILDREN!!!”...you mean the millions that don’t have homes that need good parents/family? Those real children?
[deleted]
[deleted]
blueharmony
And do you mean today or in the decades during which this woman might choose to adopt? I am thinking ‘millions’ is right.
mcivxx
In the US there's ~115k kids in foster care with the goal of adoption. You mean there's only ~5k adoptable kids in the reat of the world?
Jusmar
It's way higher than that. Not in the millions and not in the u.s. which is where the majority of this website's content and user base is.
oddyberry
And how is that still a good number?
Jusmar
It's not, but it's far from their hyperbole.
eggmuffin
Found the American.
Jusmar
Talking about American numbers on an American website that fixates on American issues. My bad.
eggmuffin
Is this your first time on the internet? Swell. Get this: Nobody gives a shit where the imgur office is.
Ryanator50
how is it exclusively an american issue?
Ryanator50
lol there's a lot more than that bruh.
stoicgoof
Worldwide or just your country? And 120k is still kind of a lot.
Jusmar
Our country actually.
and 120k is a lot, but it's a far cry from "millions"
stoicgoof
120k also doesn't take into account all the kids that child protective services won't take out of the home because they don't have anywhere+
stoicgoof
For the kid to go. I get what you're trying to do. Correcting hyperbole. And maybe that makes the situation less daunting to solve. Which I+
stoicgoof
You seriously felt the need to dig up a comment from like a year ago? I stand by that comment, but I fail to understand what you're trying +
stoicgoof
To accomplish with that.
valen00
Now now, you can't expect a closed minded person to think about something outside America. (I'm not saying Americans have a monopoly on/
valen00
closed mindedness, they just act like it)
stoicgoof
We're #1! We're #1! We're #1!
TheMouseOfMadness
It's our only export
rouxmorgue13
wife had one fourteen years ago for endo. We never looked back and adopted a wonderful son. Happiness is out there go and get it!
armyguy
Smells like outdo.
thatwastooclose
Now thats wholesome.
Pinnchy
I have endo, I'm 40 and have no desire to have children and they still won't give me a hysto
Xedi22
That’s cruel. (For what it’s worth, r/childfree on Reddit has some doc resources and lists for various regions.)
Kbantar
My partner has endo and another uterine issue. She's been given the run around for over year as things get worse. :(
JessSpile
And for the kid: He got himself a set of parents who chose him. He wasn't 'just born' by you, but chosen. That is such a cools thing! :D
tardisRetardis
I have endo and on my way to 3rd op in 2.5 years. They won't take it out because "theres still a chance". PEOPLE! I JUST WANNA POO PAIN FREE
Squeezidelic
This! I want to bang without being stuck limping in pain for weeks.. "but what if you change your mind?!"
LifeIsHardAsOneThirdOfASmore
After my 3rd surgery said enough and had everything taken. What they don’t tell you is endometriosis can still affect you after a hysto FML
tardisRetardis
In which way. As in, remaining tissue still grows? Nooo. Don't kill my dreams
Squeezidelic
Did it help at all?
stupidhorseface
Can't you just demand it? I mean, it's your body and should be your own decision
Kbantar
That would likely make it "elective" and therefore not covered at all by insurance. You'd have to be massively rich to afford it.
tardisRetardis
I live in Europe. And no sane person would electively take their uterus out. I hope
Kbantar
I can imagine some hypothetical woman that just really hates periods/kids and for whatever reason doesn't want continual birth control.
Kaleopolitus
Maybe if they live in a European country. But even in the NL, I can't get a vasectomy without a my GP approving it because I'm under 30.
tardisRetardis
I do live in Europe. I mean, at least I'm not in debt. I don't dare to think how much would that cost in USA
Squeezidelic
If only it were that simple. I've been asking for over a decade.
rouxmorgue13
still a chance for what? more pain and suffering. get a second or third or fourth opinion. there are better doctors out there
HotDamnDammit
Removing the uterus doesn't remove all the lesions. And they typically leave an ovary so you don't get osteoporosis from the loss of hormone
tardisRetardis
Yup, I have my primary gin, went to 3 clinics, they all share the same opinion. :D
twintigpuppies
I'm 26 and have been looking to be be sterilized since 18. No luck yet. It;s really cool that Im apparently to immature to decide to not 1/2
Zmokahontas
If you’re from the US, PR has many gynecologist who can do that. No questions asked. My gynecologist supports this.
twintigpuppies
I’m actually in Canada. My issue is getting a referral from my GP and then waiting for an appointment with the specialist, which is 1/3
twintigpuppies
Usually about 1-4 months away. And then then say no, say maybe in a few years or (as my last dr did) just didn’t call me for our phone 2/3
twintigpuppies
Appt. They do not accept msgs and have no email address, the only way to get ahold of them is hoping to catch the secretary in btwn patients
twintigpuppies
4/4 I wish doctors would give a fuck about me, but I don’t matter to then unless I have babies,so I’ll just stay on the pill forever I guess
twintigpuppies
have babies, but old enough that I could be 'mature enough' to take care of multiple babies. HOW OLD DO I NEED TO BE TO NOT WANT BABIES?!2/2
Crustypeanut
50. Once you're too old to have babies, you're old enough to not want them. I guess. Its stupid I know.
twintigpuppies
It’s such bullshit
Crustypeanut
Agreed. Friend of mine wants it but they won't let her for same reasons.
WeMistbornsNeedNotMakeSense
Yeah, giving birth to a baby doesnt count as parenthood. It's the care-taking part that does.
sociaCorgiPlayer
True
redstaterefugee
Saying that giving birth is the only decider is incredibly insulting to fathers.
Caper2566
Your body, your choice. Period.
Wonkable
Or lack of period
evilcarp
Unless you are a man. Then it is your body and your choice if you are rich.
Draevan13
You'd think, but my sister (32) has been trying for years and every doctor, male or female, refuses to do it. "You might change your mind".
Squeezidelic
I'm 30 and have gone through the exact same thing. It's so frustrating.
CerisCinderwolf
Isn't that grounds for legal action?
Nick3571
Y’all know having your tubes tied and hysterectomy are different things?
[deleted]
[deleted]
Wobblestone
The doctor gets to make that decision when they decide their career path, not when it threatens others freedoms. Time to find a new career.
ChrisMorray
I think you meant abortion and that's not what a hysterectomy is.
Crowscrown
Yes I did. Oops
KingKelloggTheWaffleHaggler
Did you mean abortion? Adoption is an unfortunate typo.
Crowscrown
Yes I meant to say abortion. Damn
KingKelloggTheWaffleHaggler
It's alright, typos happen.
EverNotRelevant
No periods. That's one upsides of a hysterectomy
natachan
And pregnancy
MorrighanWolf
That's not a 100 guarantee sadly.
JDJersey
It's funny how some people are more worried about a possible hypothetical future person than the one they're taking to that very much exists
confanity
I suspect it's more complicated than that, and also that the primary culprit is the projection of private fear about big body-based changes.
3141592pancake
IHaveAForest
27yo seeking hysterectomy. Its exhausting mentally, physically, and financially. And I hear the children speech every single time.
Squeezidelic
I feel your pain. 30 and still trying with a big hit to my quality of life.
r6popo
Tell them straight up it affects quality of life, then have them WRITE on your chart that they refused the surgery and why.
IHaveAForest
"My period effects my quality of life." Is not something any single doctor has ever taken seriously from me. "You just got the short straw."
r6popo
The sad reality is stuff like PMDD can take an average of 12 years to get diagnosed.
ShouldersDeepInAHorse
You're worried about actions that will severely decrease the quality of life for a future person? Sounds like a great argument FOR abortion.
NCPBullet
Dude exactly. I know it's nothing on this level but I get the same shit about wanting a vasectomy
notthejediyourelookingfor
why'd you have to mess up my day? I started thinking about what you said and that to myself and now im sad.
Willowknowsall
Fuck the patriarchy!!!! Being like, but you are but a woman how could you have any higher aspirations than breeding??
Aeixious
I was born with a defect in the vas deferens that caused a repeated infection of the bits. When I was 15 I decided I wanted a vasectomy 1/3
Aeixious
because if its not there it cant get infected. I went to 6 doctors and waited 3 years to get a vasectomy because I might want kids 2/3
Aeixious
someday. I'm gay. Even if I wanted kids, I'm almost certain its anatomically impossible. I mean, my bf hasn't gotten me preggo yet. 3/3
manwithsevenlivers
Am I a dummy, or is a vasectomy just tying the tubes, not removing the dingly danglies?
Aeixious
Usually just the tubes, but I got the whole thing out
Ironblitz
Invisiblecurse
Even if you weren't gay there is no reason to wait 3 years.Can you not just freeze some juice for later use?
Aeixious
I could, but any child I have has a chance of having muscular dystrophy so I'm good with the no kids thing tbh.
rayvn
Keep trying!
RoyalWithChz
Also, who tf gets a hysterectomy voluntarily? It’s not like getting your tubes tied - you’re doing it for a medical reason.
Tentrees
A whole LOT of women would, if they could, if it was affordable. Either they don't want children or are tired of periods, PCOS, etc etc..
RoyalWithChz
Oh. Shows what I know.
r6popo
PCOS, PMDD, Endo, etc are all medical issues
Spaceman292
I don't think that's strange. Seems pretty sensible. Are you the exact same person as you were ten years ago?
sylvnal
By that logic, we should never make major decisions. Ever.
Spaceman292
No, you just have to consider the future when you make an irreversible decision. And you don't get pissy with a DOCTOR for making sure.
Squirrelprophecies
It isn’t a matter of making sure when they are flat out refusing for no other reason than your possible ability to make babies.
lookingOknaked
You dont think person planning to undergo major surgery considered future? If nothing,it's their life,let them "fuck it up" if they want to
Spaceman292
It makes no difference to me, I'm just assuming that usually people want to avoid fucking up their life.
KinkExpert
I mean. Have you met people? They can fuck up their life, but the doctor doesn't have to be a part of it. THAT is up to them. Fair?
axelfive
Is it any of your goddamn business?
Spaceman292
Calm down bro it was rhetorical
Flowerlady0
Chill. it's up on Imger for everyone to debate. That being said, go for it it's your choice.
axelfive
And that was my officially submitted rebuttal
Flowerlady0
No problem. It's not your goddamn business either
SugerFreePolos
Even when I say I'm certain with my choice, they're always like oh hun, you don't know your own body
anengineerandacat
Shit way to say it but generally speaking opinions change as you creep towards 30; a combo of hormones and seeing others with kids.
Squeezidelic
Just passed thirty. Still haven't changed my mind. Been asking for 10 years but there's always some excuse.
SugerFreePolos
Granted that's understandable but I give reasons like I don't feel like I'm capable, I think it's selfish when I could adopt and there's
SugerFreePolos
Enough people on this planet as it is and I will never change my mind on that..... And still they're like awww sweety no
anengineerandacat
I hear you, been working with my wife on the same topic; at first we were cool with adopting but she woke up one day and wanted one herself.
LordNergal
It's 100% lawsuit prevention. They're not worried about either the hypothetical person or the person in front of them; they're trying 1/
teapartyyy
It’s the same in Sweden where you would not be able to sue over that. We just don’t get to chose and are forced to suffer.
LordNergal
not to get sued for millions just because of that one time it turns out the hypothetical future person matters. 2/2
SmashLobDrop
That could be true, except it's the same for every other developed country that doesn't have lawsuits like in the US. So no, it's sexism.
SmashLobDrop
And to be clear : the "What if you change your mind" argument still holds. Doctors don't want to "snip snap" constantly.
SmashLobDrop
It's just NOT all about lawsuit. And the worst part is, women doctors are brainwashed the same way that women should absolutely have kids.
Corrodias
Don't be too confident in that 100%.
LordNergal
I'm at least 37.29567692% certain about it. With +/-3 error ratio.
belthasarthegreat
Then your sig figs are wrong
LordNergal
Also: This is why women are frequently mandated to have pregnancy tests, even in cases where it's physically impossible for them to be 1/
kholli
The problem is that people lie. Often when pressed many women will go from "No chance." to "I don't think so"
LordNergal
pregnant, prior to surgical procedures. That the 99.99999% can be trusted doesn't offset the court costs of the 0.00001%. 2/2
r6popo
What. No.
drunkenvalley
No, it's first and foremost a bullshit sexism problem. Look to abortion debate. Far too many want to be involved in your child-rearing.
Raygereio
Yup. These assholes see women just as baby making factories.
dickblack12
Ironically, so to trans exclusionary radical feminists!
drunkenvalley
Yarp. It's fine for men to get sterilization, but women will be subject to endless barriers because "What if you change your mind?"
DeLuchtmeister
I got so much of this shit before my vasectomy. I've never been more content with a choice I've made!
BabeAfett
I've actually never heard of men being denied a vasectomy. I'm interested to hear if men have the same pressure to procreate from their docs
PenguinsAreOkayIguess
I went to a vasectomy clinic. They just made sure it's what I really wanted to do then snippity snip. Very lax which was nice.
morelikeconsham
I have heard of it, but not nearly as frequently.
motherofgods
My husband, even after we had 2 kids, was asked to reconsider in case I died and his new wife wanted kids.
BabeAfett
What the actual fuck?
motherofgods
Right?! Made me wonder what goes through their heads when people ask for these procedures
tlisx
Woooooooooow. That's fucked up.
motherofgods
Agreed. He actually took a lot of offence to the question
tlisx
Wow. Did you get a different doc lol
RoseNoire66613
This meme just hurts too much. Nobody understands how much I don't want kids. My Gynecologist refuses to let me get a hysterectomy.
HelpfulCorn
Get a mirena IUD. It's even more effective than sterilization and stops your period.
redstaterefugee
I got my tubes tied when I was 26. I didn’t realize at the time how lucky I was to have a gyno who respected me. Best decision ever.
TheobromineAddict
Are you in the US? There are 43,000 practicing Ob Gyns in the US. Wherever you are, find a new ObGyn that respects your wishes.
natachan
I'd go elsewhere and explore options about tube ties. Can you also try different contraception for your bad periods too? Maybe implant?
r6popo
How is it even their choice
Arokthis
ChildFree.reddit.com can help.
witchykitchen
Dotty
WaterWaiter
That's how I found my doc who gave me a tubal at 25
Squeezidelic
I am so jelous! Congrats! :) Just turned 30 and still no luck.
WaterWaiter
I just turned 30 also! Try referencing the sidebar in the subreddit. I wish you the best of luck finding someone to do it!
thezookeeper
I'd be curious how many guys have the same problem.
Shpielers
If you're single and under 30 with no kids, it's hard to get snipped. Possible though
evilcarp
As a man, my Dr refused to do a Hysterectomy. I was quite angry and didn't want to here his excuses.
thezookeeper
The nerve of the Dr!
jaken98
for the longest time in the US military health care system, you had to be 26 or older, married with 2 kids to get snipped
vtoria98
Get a new Dr. They provide a service to you. YOU should be the one in charge.
TheRealPumpkinQueen
I had two outright refuse. It's ridiculous.
Squeezidelic
Easier said than done in some places. Spent 5 years on a wait list for a family doctor in Québec.
vtoria98
Yeah thats crazy. Took me 15 years to find a Dr. So I know
leat
They can refuse to take it all for health reasons but its unethical to refuse to tie your tubes based on their own beliefs.
RackhamTheRed
It's an elective procedure. Unless you're employed at a hospital you're not bound by anything to carry it out.
Squeezidelic
It may be unethical, but frustratingly, it's entirely the norm.
RoseNoire66613
Oh, yeah, my mistake. That's what I meant. She refuses to tie my tubes. Which feels even worse.
valen00
Get a different one, hell tell this one you will go doctor shopping till you get what you want and their options are help or get lost.
RoseNoire66613
Doctor shopping it is ! I'm too cowardly to tell that to her face. I don't want to see her ever again, anyway. :D
Manuforti
I had the same problem. Document it is for medical comfort reasons due to horrific periods. Then they have to take you seriously
leat
Not sure how laws are where you are, but look into ethics and finding a new doctor. No one should have power over your body but you.
RoseNoire66613
Ty you so much. I share your opinion. I won't be seeing that one ever again, I'm looking for another one. I live in Belgium, if that helps.
ElviraQueenOfDarkness
You can also get your tubes tied. Same result less fucking up your hormones.
LateNightBunnyParty
You're thinking of oophorectomy. Hysterectomy is just the uterus, not necessarily the ovaries too, which release hormones.
ihateeggs
I had mine tied and had an ablation after. No periods. Gyn didnt want to do the riskier hysterectomy same result. Its awesome
RoseNoire66613
Oh, yeah, my mistake. That's what I meant. She refuses to tie my tubes. Which feels even worse.
rollerskateorgies
It's their job to ensure you understand the procedure and consequences, but how can they legally refuse?
Zmokahontas
Look for another one, girl. They’re good ones out there.
RagtimeRaver
Yikes. Might be time to find another gyno.
TheRealPumpkinQueen
Doesnt matter. I had two seperate ones refuse. It's the same for every woman. Men can get snipped but women cant. Now I have a kid.
TheRealPumpkinQueen
I love her very very much, but my life has taken a complete 180 and I sometimes mourn tge life I used to have. And I despise the docs.
HollowTubeCalledProctoscope
No matter what is the reason I need to see my gyn they always want to tell me I should have kids. So condescending. I use IUD, works great!
BumbleButts
Same I've been asking docs (in the us-- no surprise) for over 10 years and they refuse.
BabeAfett
I had to go through 4 gynos and about 2 years of consults with the last one to finally get it done. Hang in there.
Squeezidelic
I'm in Canada yet haven't had any luck.
IsuckAsthis
I was told I would need my husband's permission (not consent, permission!) to get one, as a single Australian ...
HollowTubeCalledProctoscope
U writing your comments from 1800 s?
oopski3
Wow! Same here in Boston, but that was 30 years ago. Fucking patriarchy
twintigpuppies
Report them to every authority you can find
3inches
A single childless female in Australia is unable to get tubes tied according to the medial board until they hit menopause
3inches
It's so stupid.
SlackerTactical
It's bs, but I'll pretend to be your husband if it helps you out
divinexspirit
Oh gods... I fee this so deep. I've been wanting one for years, but it'd be an "elective surgery" for me, seeing as I don't have any
divinexspirit
issues that would cause me to need one, and it's been a run around for years, acting like I'm ridiculous for NOT wanting kids, because my
glenngriffon
My family told me for years that I would change my mind about kids when i got older and my hormones hit. Then when it became unavoidable /
glenngriffon
to ignore that I was capable of not wanting kids even 30 years later they all stopped talking to me and inviting me places with them. /
glenngriffon
Apparently no one in my family saw me for me, they just saw someone that could add children to the family. Till I didn't. Then I was no one.
divinexspirit
area is very conservative, and women SHOULD eventually want kids.
twintigpuppies
I’m with you my friend. Been trying for years and they just fucking ignore me
TheRealPumpkinQueen
Same here. I'm sorry. :(