SurvivalModeForTheWin
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Nov 20, 2022 4:07 PM
SurvivalModeForTheWin
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cutewittyslightlysarcasticnamehere
Yep, you could lose the job. But you get to sleep at night AND you've got your soul. A better job will show up, if you need it.
KodiakDDS
Fuck that, you did the right thing. Leave abusing special needs people to cops
Bhockzer
Write everything up from the teacher hurting the student to the response of your coworkers. If you are fired, send it all to the local paper
HandsomePenguin
SPecial EDucation?
freckledkink
Yes
inscrutablehorse
Thanks!
alienflavored
Thank you. Never let anyone pressure you into losing your ethics.
DancesWithHippos
Good for you, anyway! There's no excuse for that and we need sped teachers like you instead. If the system corrupts itself, at least u tried
DancesWithHippos
And really, there are plenty of trade jobs that pay way more than teaching if they DO oust you for that. Some of them involve helping kids 2
SurvivalModeForTheWin
This job gets my son in a good school system, and gives me the same schedule as him.
SindarElla
Document everything. Good luck.
DancesWithHippos
No doubt there are many reasons to stay &you certainly deserve praise, not punishment for your actions, but don't despair if they do fire u.
EMTsaidwhat
As some who works in EMS thank you for reporting the misconduct. Documentation is key to protecting vulnerable populations.
Deleteded
If you do, be proud that you did the right thing. Regardless of the consequences, you're a good person and I'm driving proud of you.
bekindtoanimals
Thank you for having integrity. Fuck them
Bleedingyamato
You did the right thing regardless of what happens to you. I’m sorry your coworkers are terrible people.
MajorPoopyPants
You did the right thing. Sue the bastards.
KenKorte
Parent of special needs child, people like you stand in the way of our greatest fear, abuse when our child is away from us
rej787810
As a former SPED employee, tell the parents you did this and tell the parents what the teacher did. If they're any good they'll raise hell.
rej787810
You did the right thing. The parents have every right to know. And they could end up taking care of the problem teacher for you.
brianingram
Document tf out of everything from this point forward & seek a transfer. Otherwise, prepare for war (wrongful termination/retaliation).
CrimeBrulee
My wife's passion is children with disabilities. She quit SPED 2 years after getting her degree. Moved to therapy bc schools are so toxic.
elemcsere
That was my original profession too. Lasted 4 years. Now Im a corpo rat. At least it pays
PiratePeter
How so if you don't mind me asking? Teachers to teachers? Or mistreatment of students?
YallNeedSlaanesh
Sometimes both. I experienced the teacher to teacher first hand, which is more common.
CrimeBrulee
140 char answer: The culture has gone rotten. It's all about hitting specific metrics that children with disabilities don't figure into.
Jesssmash
From someone who has a SPED kid, THANK YOU for advocating for them
Headcase444
Call a lawyer.
TyrTheTired
If it's any comfort, most sped folks I know would be on your side in this. What happened, exactly, if I might ask?
Johnniecr0atia
Are you part of a union? Even if you're not, contact the local branch of the NEA or whatever relevant teachers union is near you.
notkvothethebloodless
(1)So your coworkers are mad that you turned in another coworker hurting a special needs kid??? How soon can we expect an investigation
notkvothethebloodless
(2) into every single goddamn one of those fuckers? Cause that sounds like misdirected guilt and shame to me.
ThreeLeftsMakeARight
Do you have a union? Talk to them about retaliation.
SurvivalModeForTheWin
No union.
ThreeLeftsMakeARight
What state
SurvivalModeForTheWin
TN
LDSmithereens
What is sped?
SurvivalModeForTheWin
Special education
FeedTheRats
Context?
soon
Hard to imagine that the majority of people who chose to go into that field would condone harming children.
mycatToastwasafatasshole
Some people like that job bc it puts them in power and provides them with easy targets. The same reason some people become cops.
BunchaCrunchOfHuman
Sped has a lot of para educators who aren't choosing the field so much as landing in it. Plus sped kids can be violent and it takes a toll
BunchaCrunchOfHuman
But the teacher is still the adult and should be able to handle the stress without hurting the kid intentionally or unintentional
MarMarrr
Exactly! It's a tough job and kids will act out. I've been bitten, spit on, hair pulled and had to block punches. Not everyone can handle it
SurvivalModeForTheWin
Yep. Can’t even count the number of times I’ve gone home bruised or bloodied. But I manage to not hit back or anything like that.
Likander
When I was young SPED was still new to schools and abuse was not only condoned but encouraged in many cases.
Likander
We weren't even people to most of them, and they made sure we knew it. It was quite an unpleasant "learning" environment.
SurvivalModeForTheWin
I’ve noticed that a lot of my coworkers seem to forget that our students are…people. They only see the disability.
Pyrolillycherry
I'm so sorry
LovesToSpooge517
Unfortunately abuse is all too common in caregiving fields like SPED, healthcare, etc. very hard to separate the behavior from the person.
LovesToSpooge517
Source: my parents were/are healthcare professionals, and abusive.
PosthumousExile
I'll say it a thousand times. The police know my dad is a pedophile. They won't do anything about it. He works in pediatrics in home care.
ElectricNoodle
Could you post anonymously online? Pretty f'd
BatLadyRielle
I read an article recently about a 7yo who was stressed out and spitting, so a cop cuffed him and held him on the ground for 30+ min while-
BatLadyRielle
2 sped teachers chatted with the cop about the weather. https://www.cbsnews.com/news/hundreds-of-elementary-students-arrested-at-us-schools/
SurvivalModeForTheWin
Yeah, no. I’d be getting arrested, too, because they would NOT do that to any of my students.
BatLadyRielle
right? I couldn't even imagine just standing by while they did this to any kid. I gotta wonder how the parents of other kids there feel...
BatLadyRielle
if they'll do this to one kid for spitting, what could they do to another kid having a REALLY bad day? hurts to even think of it.
Lovingimpaler
Abusive people often seek out situations in which they have opportunities to victimize under the radar.
SurvivalModeForTheWin
Yeah. I realized she’s never done anything to the one student we’ve ever had who has conversational speech skills and could tell parents.
Lovingimpaler
Stay strong, you did the right thing.
Taxicat
You’d be surprised. Trying to track down the study, but I read that women who were bullies in high school often go into teaching and >
soon
The comments to my question are eye opening.
Taxicat
Wish I could still find that study for you. Had it bookmarked somewhere but not sure where.
Taxicat
>nursing, both of which offer them the same sort of power and authority over a captive audience as well as the public perception of >
Taxicat
>the moral high ground (makes it much easier for them to get away with the abuse). Same study found male bullies preferred the police.
smutfiend
Turn in the other assholes for being assholes.
SurvivalModeForTheWin
I wish it worked that way.
CurbYourClassWar
Doesn't work like that. That's how you get fired. HR will choose the easy route which is getting rid of the employee making waves.
SurvivalModeForTheWin
Yeah. I was warned about that by a former employee.
zylokun
So they're siding with the child abuser?
QQTrain
No good deed goes unpunished.
notyoubizness
I hate that saying SO MUCH. But it isn't wrong.
BORGALOOGIE
Appreciate this dark-humor proverb, I wish we could live in a society moving 2 steps forward and 1 back, not other way around. All forward.
jackal12345
All helpful urges must be circumvented.
TotallyNotTheNSAGuys
thats my new creeeeed
MornieAlantie
Let all oz be agreed, I'm wicked through and through.
Bigblackdick69
Since I cannot succeed in saving you, I promise I attempt to do again
Heisanevilgenius
I've been rewarded for good deeds and punished. We don't do good deeds because we expect rewards. We do them because they're right.
Heisanevilgenius
The motto of people who never do good deeds to justify not doing them
KingMagenta
Why are good deeds punished though? It's a rhetorical question of course, but it shouldn't be this way
Idonotkillpeoplethatismyleastfavoritethingtodo
Because bad people control the world.
TheRealArclight
because of shitty ppl..
Mentok
"shouldn't be this way" - applicable to human nature and most of human history.
TuckerCarlsonWarnedYouTheredBeGirlsLikeMe
Our entire society is built on stepping on someone else's back so showing empathy and compassion goes directly against that.
Rheios
I'd argue the world itself is. Nature is just brutalizing something else for food/territory/mates pretty much all the way down.
SneakECoyote
The wicked twist the truth in a way the honest and good cannot. In a cynical society it's easier to believe you're just another villain.
NoQuestionMarksInDeclarativeSentences
Lack of accountability/public shame.
ColonelCasual
Because when someone in power faces consequences those who are equally guilty are quick to lash out, lest they be next.
ImmortalChild
I was an EA who complained about a teacher who screamed in 5yo's faces. Guess who got a letter in their file about it ?
ArsenalThePhoenix
did u sue them?
ImmortalChild
Sue whom for what?
spiderzim
The 5 year olds
katiekinsman
I reported a Sped teacher for what she did to her kids in the classroom. I'm the one who got in trouble; the art teacher.
PiratePeter
You're a good person. I hate that the right thing is jumbled in today's law. Absolute ridiculousness.
katiekinsman
I really wanted to stomp a whole in the womans face when I watched her interact with the students. She had no business being a teacher.
JohnSmithterms
As a parent I would very much have liked to have known that and made sure it never happened again to future kids.
ImmortalChild
She made a kid poop his pants out of fear and I nearly lost my job over it and I'd do it again. It was an awful year.
Twrecks123
So…just curious. Was that teacher in AZ?
ImmortalChild
Nah, I used to live in Toronto.
Twrecks123
Ah, I have a family member who was fired for this after abusing kids for 10 years and teachers and admin just letting her get away with it/1
Imetjkrowling
Dis you tell the parents?
ImmortalChild
Obviously. And obviously parents complained about her. Teachers are v difficult to fire if there's a union. She was bounced to a dif school.
Promethianfire
Unions need to stop protecting bad people. I'm looking at you, police unions!
NoQuestionMarksInDeclarativeSentences
Gotta record these fuckers.
CatskinnerKeen
If you also record the kids it's absolutely a crime.
SurvivalModeForTheWin
Not necessarily. Most of our students’ parents have signed “media releases,” meaning we can take photos and videos.
ImmortalChild
Easy enough now but this was a while back and in hindsight maybe I'd have done things differently but it's in the past..
PiratePeter
Like what? I hear these stories and they make me so sad. My son is non verbal autistic and I worry every day I'm sending him to school.
ImmortalChild
Out of the 30ish teachers I've worked with she was the only awful one. I'd have worked harder to get her fired, worried less abt myself.
Kaileeb92
Sign up for the union if you haven't already. They can be a double-edged sword, but they're able to help folks like you if it goes sideways
Steamjack
Double edged in what way?
Kaileeb92
in that they get teachers representation and bargaining power against the school board/county/state, but they can also get people 1/2
Kaileeb92
transferred who should have simply been fired and possibly jailed 2/2
Steamjack
The first part I know, the second part I doupt. It's not a legal entety and even if you're shit at your job you should have the same rights.
SurvivalModeForTheWin
We don’t have one. 1. Right to work state. 2. I’m an assistant.
ratfaceddog
If you don’t have a union, what does RTW have to do with anything?
SurvivalModeForTheWin
It means unions have no power in my state, so they’re useless.
TransformerStuffedAnimals
Document everything, with dates. Whistleblowers are protected by law. But proof of retaliation is key. Even small stuff, if it seems off
TransformerStuffedAnimals
Document it. The one with the best documentation wins the court case if they choose to retaliate.. Good for you for doing the right thing.
Kaileeb92
that's an oof. how's admin at your school?
SurvivalModeForTheWin
My admin is taking this seriously finally. (Not the first time I’ve had to do this.) But he is afraid of/has a crush on the main teacher 1/2
SurvivalModeForTheWin
who is mad at me. (Not the perpetrator, just someone who sweeps it under the rug.) So…I’m worried. 2/2
Kaileeb92
Ah, yes. Nothin like thirst to derail the best laid plans. Here's hoping he remembers his backbone and thinks w/his big head. do the other 1
OliverKlozoff1269
Assistant sped as well...we're union and hiring! Hmu :)
SurvivalModeForTheWin
I’m stuck in my city for 6.5 more years.
stankginchfurbuger
What were they doing, exactly? What was the harm being caused?
Larktonguesinadicecup
Yeah. Before I cheer op on I need to know if there was real harm or they got someone good fired over something minor.
Larktonguesinadicecup
Coworkers response makes sense if op overstepped. Context required.
SurvivalModeForTheWin
…Do you think it is ever okay to deliberately hurt a student?
Larktonguesinadicecup
I think some people may disagree about what is and isn't harmful.
Larktonguesinadicecup
What was it?
SurvivalModeForTheWin
Tiny 6 yr old with Down Syndrome pinched her. She pinched the child back, tauntingly said, “It hurts, doesn’t it,” & berated her for crying.
tacoaboutit
Thank you! Thank you for doing the right thing and being an advocate for that kid.
vicmango201410
Hell Yeah
rifte0201
Being morally just is the most difficult thing to do in today's world. Thank you for it.
HowlerTwo
If I ran a company, I'd offer this person a job if they got sacked. We need more people like OP in our lives/society.
oarttam
Working with special needs clients can be much like being in an abusive relationship but you are paid to take the abuse.
SurvivalModeForTheWin
Yes. But if you can’t deal with it, you find a different job or transfer to a different setting.
LooseyGooseyBrett
What is sped
ratfaceddog
S Pecial E Ducation, apparently.
esycs
Special education I’m assuming
Floridiot
Searching shows it's often a derogatory term for those in Special Ed
NineByNine
what banana rotate at
Bonnsdoxy
Special education
TheCrochetedSunflower
I haven’t heard SPED used in awhile is it still used commonly in the profession I’m only curious because I’ve usually heard it as an insult.
thezookeeper
Fun fact, in my district special Ed also included the gifted and talented program
Bonnsdoxy
My MIL was an assistant in a special needs classroom. Probably why I know of the phrase.
NoQuestionMarksInDeclarativeSentences
"Working in SPED" is fine. Calling them that isn't.
TheCrochetedSunflower
Thank you very much for the differentiation.. that explanation is incredibly helpful and educational.
Giant2179
Yes, it's still used in the appropriate context. My daughter is in a sped classroom
TheCrochetedSunflower
Thank you very much!!
Elbowdeepinabeepbeepsheep
I was in a SPED resource room class. The teacher was an alcoholic and a bitch. Had to get my mom to bring me home more than a few times.